drive through (643 hits)
Category: NoneRating: -1.54 on 15 reviews (Rate this item) (V)
Submitted by shane mcpherson (View user info) at 2004-05-21 08:02:53 EDT
As humans, we'll often chant some montra that claims we'll never partake in something wrong. For instance, "I'm never going to cheat on my wife/girlfriend/significant other!!!" Then of course, if you're weak-minded enough, you get some secretary intern that's giving you the eye at work, and before you know it, you find yourself in the sack with this broad. It's a sad story, more or less contributing to the 50% divorce rate, but you'll find it at all stages of intimacy and all levels of life.
In my case, for insance, I had my first brush with the sins of human passion in no where else but high school. I was in tenth grade, and it wasn't a matter of breaking under sexual urges. Well, it was, but it was more or less of just getting swept off my feet from hearing about outrageous sexual events that my classmates secretly had been partaking in, as all the stories quietly accumulated up to a Friday night date. In other words, where I once stood my ground on chastity, I surrendured my moral fiber to peer pressure, all in a week's worth. And at the end, an unfamilar friend brought me to my senses.
It all started in the hallway on a Friday in February, where I stood with a friend of mine named Dan Griffin, who wasn't the greatest friend in the world but seemed decent when you warmed up to him, and my current crush, Julie Gegich, who more or less always had her eyes averted to the man beside her at the time, Dan Griffin. It was there where I heard that Julie, around a year ago, at a party, did what most high schoolers do when they're in ninth grade; made out with a guy for the sheer hell of it. With another girl in the fray, I might add. (9th grade threesome!) The story was told at that time with ill-hearted ease, but me, being rather coy at the time and anti-establishment, I shriveled up into a ball and felt about yay big. Julie, my crush, did exactly what I never saw in her - she actually made out with another guy whom she didn't have a crush on. And, at a party! If I was at that party, I would have said "no thanks" to the beer, told whoever wanted to make out with me that I was saving it for marriage, and offered to drive home any drunk people. Despite the fact that I couldn't even drive in 9th grade, but you get the point.
All in all, the idea was very simple; I wasn't going to believe that it'd be cool to make out with random people just to brag about it the next day (or even, yes, the next year). Nor would I believe that it'd be right in the first place, because at the time, making out was grounds for losing pre-adolecsent virginity, and that was a no-no. I believed kissing was an essential locking of two lips with a subtle underlying of love floating between both partners.
Either that, or I was a prude.
Because, if the Julie cataclysm was bad enough, I heard about another girl in our class who gave this older kid a hand job. Well, humiliatingly, I had to be informed as to what a "hand job" was, at that time. Yes, in tenth grade, I wasn't very advacned in "what you don't learn in the classroom." And, once I found out what a "hand job" was, I nearly skwered my mouth, threw my hands back and yelled "eeewwww!!!" Nearly. Because if I thought what Julie did was bad, then Lauren the Hand Job Girl was a grade-A playboy playmate, and had a lifestyle I'd never want myself.
Yes, everyone, I was a tenth grade prude.
One weekend, where I sat alone at my computer like I did most every weekend in high school, I found the urge to call a girl by the name of Megan Bonhag to see if she wanted to see a movie that night. She happened to be busy, but told me she'd love to catch a flicker the following weekend, so a rain check it was. Megan was fairly pretty, and fairly outgoing, despite the fact that she hated everyone and everything about grades nine through twelve, but I didn't let that bother me. A movie it was.
And, combined with two interactions with sex-craving girls in two days, I wondered what the chances were of me scoring on Megan at the movies next week, to which I then fought with myself to maintain the "moral fiber" I had going within me and promise myself I wouldn't sink to such a level. Nevertheless, I grew a bit flustered and called my sister to arrange a lunch date for the next day. My older sister was a year into a community college, and could drive by the high school to take me to lunch. I'd talk about Megan a little bit, but I'd mostly talk about Julie, and see if Ruthy could give me some insight as to how I could land the girl.
But when we sat down to eat that following Monday, Ruthy immediatley embarked on what a great boyfriend she had. Ruthy was the oldest of three, and rather enjoyed being the center of attention at all outings, and she certainly got the center of attention that afternoon. Not only did I learn of what a great boyfriend she had, but I learned that she drank, smoked, and partyed, and slept with the bee eff on many an occasion. Ruthy now became sex-craving girl number three, and proved to be a partyer on top of that. Great, thanks Ruth. I'll take the bill, okay?
I sort of felt like a character in the roaring twenties, where everyone got shit faced at the Gatsby's and screwed around all the time with absolutley no shame whatsoever. And that as long as everyone else was doing it, it was okay. Unfortunatly, as this growing-up atrocity continued, I talked with Megan the following day to which she shamelessly told me of an occurance the previous year; where she was come down on by a senior in high school. She laughed and giggled and told it with great enthusiasm, until she realized that I wasn't really digging it as much as she was. Suddenly Megan and I were mad at each other and we both wondered if the movie would still be on.
This all accumulated in a single week. By Friday I found myself in a math class with another sophomore, as we were the only two there, working on our homework together, but our work came second to my friend's comedic recollections of the sexual intercourses he'd have every weekend with the jaw-dropping gorgeous Maren Auxier. "It's not like what I did was bad," he'd say. "Besides, I was wearing a condom." The ordeals of this kid and his friend-with-benefits Maren was a fairly common story around the school, and I was totally clueless of any of it before he told me. Just as I was clueless of Julie, and Lauren, and my sister, and Megan. As of this moment, I felt like I could hear anything.
Hey, you, you a virgin? No? Really, so how'd you lose it?
Oh, and I got a letter from Megan that day where she sobbed about how sad she was and worried that I was mad at her because she considered my friendship very special, the whole letter being parallel to the work of a sixteen year old girl. I took it to the restroom to read it and thought it was totally cool to read letters from girls. But of course, I sulked a little and acted like I was bummed, when on the inside, I was screaming, "yeeeeessss!!!" and "I am SO saving this!"
I was changing! Suddenly the thought of Megan and I rolling around in her car with our clothes off seemed super-cool, and definitley let her know that, "oh no, the movie's still on. Of course."
"Really? Oh, thank you Harry."
"So, how much room do you have in your car?"
Well, actually, it went like this: She had a poms performance on Friday which I made my apology after, and when the basketball game was finished, we worked our way to her car to take off for the evening. Like most high school girls are after poms dances, Megan was jumpy as hell and excited about anything. It must have been all that makeup getting to her brain. Anyway, we ended up going to Burger King and ordered a few fries, where I made seriously lame attempts at being funny, but attempts that fell through, essentially. One involved the telling of a story where I saw this TV show once, where a guy really likes this girl and makes out with her at the end of the show, but as it followed into the next episode, we learn that this chick has a...get this!...a DICK. HAHAHaha.... We laughed for a few minutes. She mostly laughed at the way I popped out chuckels and high pitched giggles like I always do when I feel totally moronic and am doing totally moronic things, not at my retarded story. But oh well, laugher is laughter, isn't it?
At the end of the night I got her to drive to the Open Space overlooking the night on the edge of the winter's harbor. After hours of working up to it, I leaned in and gave her a pathetic little peck on the lips. Horrible. And you know what I said? "You don't have a dick, do you?"
Such a lame first kiss. And like a lame high schooler I got online and bragged to all my friends about landing my first kiss when I landed nothing that was bragatory at all. I'm a senior now and I see kids in 10th grade stealing girls from me and doing god knows what behind closed doors. Nonetheless I was on top of the world, even as I hooked up with Megan the next day to go see the movie, where we didn't kiss again, much less make out, like the coy children we really were.
And then my fun came to an abrupt end, that afternoon. Thinking I was part of the pack now, I gloated to a friend of mine who refused to believe me. She thought I was shitting her and that it was all a con of some sort that was put together by my friends to draw some nasty trick on her, whatever that "trick" may be. After a while the reality came clear to her, and then out of nowhere she said right to my face, "Harry, you don't like Megan, do you? No, you don't. So you kissed her for the hell of it? Wow, Harry, you are truly the one guy in this world who would never kiss just anyone." Then she walked away. And I stood there drained of any enthusiasm I may have had for thinking I was now running with the crowd. I now ran with not only the dorks, but the hypocrites as well. How enlightening.
And really, she made a lot of sense. I wasn't like that, however cute or cliché or moronic this message may be. It's not a bad thing to make out with girls, not in high school, especially when that's all kids do at that age, but it's essentially a dumb thing to do something just because everyone else is, obviously. And it's even dumber to brag about it the next day.
So, if Megan was my first kiss, and I was in 10th grade, I clearly got more action from other girls in the years to follow, didn't I? Nope, not since my cute little peck have I landed myself a pair of ruby reds. If I had, then this story would never be told by me again, and instead this paper would be filled with the time I really made it count. Which I noticeably haven't embarked on yet. But all in all, so goes the story of love and heartache, where you...well, sorry, I guess this has nothing to do with either.
User Reviews
Submitted by macadamia (user info) at 2005-05-01 22:45:06 EDT (#)
Ranking: 0
This is Harry Gillen, the author of this post.
If you've stumbled upon this because I used your real name, then I'm sure you're very angry with me. That's okay. What I've written here and what I've said is unexcusable, irresponsible, and flat out untrue in many cases. The comments I've made about Ms. Auxier are untrue, for instance. The way I represented Julie Gegich is irresponsible, for instance, as goes the words I used for Ms. Bonhag and many others. I represented many real individuals wrongly and in a stretched sense, and for that I am sincereley apologetic. This post isn't recent, but the wrongs I've made are ever present. I'm sorry for the things I've said about everybody in this post - you or your identity had no reason to be listed here.
Please understand that it was not my intention to submit this post as a means to entertain people; what it really is is a homework assignment I had to write for high school. At the time this was written and to be handed in, my printer was broken and I needed to be able to access this essay from a printable source. Hence, this website was accessable at my school, so I therefore submitted it here. I hope this at least clears up my motives for writing this, but I'm not excusing my actions; it never should have reached such accessability. And nor should I have written it for a homework assignmnent.
If you have anything to say to me, contact me at Harry.at.gillville.net
And once again, my apologies.
-Harry
Submitted by filemaster (user info) at 2004-05-29 17:37:44 EDT (#)
Ranking: 0
sorry,
my e-mail is rosswell50.at.hotmail.com
Submitted by filemaster (user info) at 2004-05-29 17:35:54 EDT (#)
Ranking: 1
I was talking with Maren Auxier just yesterday.
I use to go to st. Francis, I just finished my last day of high school ever at Central.
My name is Ross Maxbauer, I switched schools after 8th grade
I'd really like to talk to you.
please e-mail me.
Submitted by conrad (user info) at 2004-05-21 14:14:27 EDT (#)
Ranking: -2
Far too long for such meiocre content. Method, is all this Eminemism actually necessary?
Submitted by youarsoghey (user info) at 2004-05-21 13:42:02 EDT (#)
Ranking: -2
No Comment
Submitted by iamhewhoisnot (user info) at 2004-05-21 12:19:22 EDT (#)
Ranking: -1
No Comment
Submitted by euripidestrousers (user info) at 2004-05-21 11:02:13 EDT (#)
Ranking: -1
No Comment
Submitted by DeathJester (user info) at 2004-05-21 10:18:40 EDT (#)
Ranking: -2
You're both wrong, it's 3 times.
Go join him in the naughty corner.
Submitted by mystiamoon (user info) at 2004-05-21 10:05:31 EDT (#)
Ranking: -2
No fucking way I'm going to even try and read this giant block of letters.
Submitted by Herpes (user info) at 2004-05-21 10:02:31 EDT (#)
Ranking: -2
Pressing enter 5 times before you write does NOT count as using paragraphs.
Submitted by Caulaincourt (user info) at 2004-05-21 09:57:40 EDT (#)
Ranking: -2
triple die
Submitted by funk_boy (user info) at 2004-05-21 08:19:19 EDT (#)
Ranking: -2
Just popping out for a bit
Submitted by Method (user info) at 2004-05-21 08:15:54 EDT (#)
Ranking: -2
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Submitted by DCWoody (user info) at 2004-05-21 08:10:37 EDT (#)
Ranking: -2
Dur......parawhats?......hey look a penny!
Submitted by DraconianKing (user info) at 2004-05-21 08:07:09 EDT (#)
Ranking: -2
What the fuck was that? First you have 2 empty lines, then wayyy too many lines of shit.
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Also, spell check this..."montra" its "mantra" bitch.