Moonchild (476 hits)
Category: NoneRating: 1.5 on 10 reviews (Rate this item) (V)
Submitted by indigogecko (View user info) at 2004-05-27 03:56:56 EDT
"..want young teachers in technical and scientific fields, young engineers in a range of disciplines, children with good grades in science and a desire to travel.."
There was more, but Jamie didn't hear it as he turned from the viewscreen and called to his father.
"Dad, they're still recruiting for that lunar base."
"Jamie, we've been through this, the answer is still no."
"Dad, I've got the grades and you know how much I want to do this!"
"I'm not having my kid raised by strangers. Besides I'd never see you again."
Jamie carried on the arguemnet knowing full well it wouldn't get him anywhere, this had been going on for 3 weeks, ever sinse they first started advertising the First International Lunar Base. But somehow his dad didn't seem to be coming up with any reasons this time, and then Jamie hit on the clincher.
"..I'd be on the linkup every night, so you'll be the first to know everything that happens. It's an investment in the future dad. Not to mention I'll owe a combined sum of over a grand in bets..."
His dad looked lmore than a little unimpressed with the betting part, but his face softened a little.
"You're really not going to let this lie are you?"
It was time to drop the bomb.. a little dramatic pause and..
"Mom would have let me."
Jamiemanaged to portray vast emotion in those 5 words, and inwardly congratulated himself on sounding so sullen. He sniffed slightly and managed to squeeze out a single tear. He rasised his face to look plaintively at his father with glistening emerald-green eyes.
It worked.
Oh god, did it work.
His dad gave him a hug, holding him tight.
"I miss her too, son", he muttered into his hair, "And if it means that much to you.."
He held the boy out a little to look into his yes.
"It means that much to me, dad."
"Then I'd be wrong to stop you."
Jamie rewarded his dad with a smile that could light a black hole and grabbed him for another hug.
The next bit isn't so dialogue heavy, but this post is getting long..
User Reviews
Submitted by Magicaddict (user info) at 2004-05-29 12:30:54 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
Hmmm...interesting start.
Submitted by AlwaysAnEagle (user info) at 2004-05-27 12:22:52 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
Just wish there'd been more.
Submitted by AshK (user info) at 2004-05-27 11:51:05 EDT (#)
Ranking: 1
I just posted my first story, and opted not to repeat the first part with the second. I just included a link. I didn't really get much feedback on the story one way or the other, but I would just link to the original. This looks really good, I am looking forward to seeing what happens next.
Submitted by WRECKER (user info) at 2004-05-27 11:35:07 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
I dug it. Please do post more tomprrow.
Submitted by indigogecko (user info) at 2004-05-27 11:23:16 EDT (#)
Ranking: 0
I will be posting the next bit tomorrow... worth posting the first bit again with it for continuity?
Submitted by FearBenzene (user info) at 2004-05-27 09:52:22 EDT (#)
Ranking: 1
No Comment
Submitted by Random Joe at 2004-05-27 07:42:14 EDT (#)
Ranking: 0
Emotional blackmail aye?
Submitted by Circe (user info) at 2004-05-27 06:36:17 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
Thank you... thank you thank you thank you... in amongst "i h8 uber" and assorted other angsty badness, I find something worth reading.
Submitted by indoninja (user info) at 2004-05-27 06:23:17 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
I meant to give it a 1, this should balance it out.
Submitted by indoninja (user info) at 2004-05-27 06:22:32 EDT (#)
Ranking: 0
there really isn't enough here to tell if i like it or not yet, you don't really know where it is going, but I would like to see more.