I want to be an executive (547 hits)
Category: NoneRating: 1.18 on 17 reviews (Rate this item) (V)
Submitted by Trout (View user info) at 2004-05-27 14:44:34 EDT
I had to go to my company's head office for a meeting today.
What to wear?
I usually don't have to wear a suit to work but having never been to head office I thought my usual outfit of jeans and t-shirt might not go down well.
So out with the black suit.
Having not wore a suit regularly for about five years I had forgotten that people actually treat you better the smarter you're dressed.
The car park attendant at the airport called my sir, and to steal a line from Homer J it was the first time in a while that I had been called sir without the "you're making a scene" addendum.
I was feeling good.
I went to the check in desk:
Me: Good morning, I'm booked on the flight to London, booking number 1234x, name of Trout.
Check-in Lady: One moment sir
<sir again!!>
Check-in Lady: Yes, here we go Mr Trout. Would you like a window or aisle seat?
Me: <a choice, holy fuck> Aisle please.
Check-in Lady: Gate 17. Have a pleasant flight, the executive lounge is on the third floor.
Executive lounge, what's she talking about?
I decided to go to the third floor and see.
I walked in and handed over my ticket, a quick check later and I was ushered in.
I was not prepared for what I saw.
Newspapers, food, cakes, wine, beer, spirits, coffee, juices. All sitting there, free, for me to consume and read.
I was like a kid in a candy store.
I stuffed my pockets full of individually packaged biscuits and fruit cake and ate as much as I could before my flight. Washed down with all the lattes I could find and tomato juice.
I can't believe the executive lounge lets people loose like that. If I didn't have a meeting I would have been drunk as a monkey.
I'm eating a honey and oatmeal biscuit right now purloined from the lounge.
My new goal in life is to be an executive, all I want to do is fly places and hang out in executive airport lounges eating biscuits. Then flying to a meeting and talking shite and drinking more coffe then doing the same.
For once in my life I felt like a big man.
Executives rock.
User Reviews
Submitted by Trout (user info) at 2004-05-28 17:51:01 EDT (#)
Ranking: 0
Submitted by itchy (user info) at 2004-05-27 21:58:42 (#)
Ranking: 2
Hey, now I'm drunk and I just want to say . . . I love you man.
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Yay itchy, you just went up a notch in my estimation.
You're now at one..... :)
Submitted by itchy (user info) at 2004-05-27 21:58:42 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
Hey, now I'm drunk and I just want to say . . . I love you man.
Submitted by Insanethemind (user info) at 2004-05-27 17:15:43 EDT (#)
Ranking: 1
No Comment
Submitted by Totally_useless (user info) at 2004-05-27 16:24:55 EDT (#)
Ranking: 1
I don't expect anyone a need me for anything.
<hangs head in shame>
Submitted by Trout (user info) at 2004-05-27 16:19:57 EDT (#)
Ranking: 0
I've just remembered the only good bit from the Flinstones movie, when they do a reinactment of Fred's alleged theft on TV (?)
Secretary: What are you doing?
Fred: I'm an executive, I'm embezzling.
Secretary: I'm shocked.
Submitted by munkeypants (user info) at 2004-05-27 16:12:54 EDT (#)
Ranking: 0
"I'm an executive. (Hence my name...) "
as a "pee on" i can appreciate that line!
Submitted by Totally_useless (user info) at 2004-05-27 16:10:37 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
I'm an executive. (Hence my name...)
Best part of all the travel is the massive amount of frequent frier mileage you can collect.
A coworker of mine was looking up his miles last week, and called me over to show me that he had over 175,000 miles, simply from corporate trips.
I need more flights...
Anyone need me a consultation about their telecommunications setup?
Preferrably in Amsterdam or Australia, thanks...
Submitted by Trout (user info) at 2004-05-27 16:05:49 EDT (#)
Ranking: 0
Submitted by munkeypants (user info) at 2004-05-27 15:58:17 (#)
Ranking: 0
nope. I am all woman.
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Score!
Submitted by munkeypants (user info) at 2004-05-27 15:58:17 EDT (#)
Ranking: 0
nope. I am all woman.
Submitted by Trout (user info) at 2004-05-27 15:48:22 EDT (#)
Ranking: 0
Submitted by munkeypants (user info) at 2004-05-27 15:14:39 (#)
Ranking: 1
I want to marry an executive so when you become one look me up...
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An extra incentive............
Please don't tell me you're a man, or 15.........
Submitted by munkeypants (user info) at 2004-05-27 15:14:39 EDT (#)
Ranking: 1
I want to marry an executive so when you become one look me up...
"If I didn't have a meeting I would have been drunk as a monkey. "
HAHAHAHAHA
Submitted by itchy (user info) at 2004-05-27 15:01:55 EDT (#)
Ranking: 1
Sooooooo tempting, but meh, I'm not a dick.
This was funny. I had the same experience the first time I flew first class.
Submitted by Trout (user info) at 2004-05-27 14:52:44 EDT (#)
Ranking: 0
Submitted by Envenom (user info) at 2004-05-27 14:49:28 (#)
Ranking: 1
Meh
Boardrooms are usually like that, even though we don't officially have an "executive lounge."
I thought you were a chick?
http://www.ubersite.com/m/31849
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No, that post was a piss take.
Picture is squattail and hired hooker.
Submitted by Trout (user info) at 2004-05-27 14:50:18 EDT (#)
Ranking: 0
Dammit, my picture of Gordon Gecko didn't attach.
Oh well.
Submitted by Envenom (user info) at 2004-05-27 14:49:28 EDT (#)
Ranking: 1
Meh
Boardrooms are usually like that, even though we don't officially have an "executive lounge."
I thought you were a chick?
http://www.ubersite.com/m/31849
Submitted by BLITZKREIG_BOB (user info) at 2004-05-27 14:47:13 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
Gotta love free alcohol.
Submitted by whataefag (user info) at 2004-05-27 14:47:12 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
I hear the paycheck's not bad either.