Your Angry Hippo Will Not Prevail Over Doom Itself (679 hits)
Category: NoneRating: 1.47 on 16 reviews (Rate this item) (V)
Submitted by Don'tEmailMe@don'temailme.com (View user info) at 2004-05-27 18:41:18 EDT
It was indeed a very mournful day. A very mournful day indeed. A day that people all over the world would grow accustomed to calling...
"Very Mournful."
What exactly was so very mournful you ask? Well let me first start by telling you a little story.
This is a story about a man and his wife who went on a picnic. It was on this day that he and her realized the severity of the situation. Indeed, the severity was great. How great a severity are we speaking? So great that it is described as being...
"Very Mournful."
Let me begin at the beginning.
This is a story about a man and his wife who went on a picnic. Or is it? Actually this story really has to do with the three legged dog standing by them watching them eat. More specifically this story revolves around the baby puppies inside of the three legged puppy.
These puppy babies will sadly never be born.
Onward with the story, this puppy had a mission. Her mission was to steal the gelatinous mound of fishy substance that these 1930's man and woman were eating. Did she do so? Did I mention that this puppy was pregnant?
At the same time all this storytelling was going on, a little boy drowned somewhere in Japan.
THE PUPPY MADE A DASH FOR THE GILATINOUS MACKERAL OF LOVE, AND SNATCHED IT UP WITH INTENSITY AND VIGOR. SHE RACED! RACED! RACED TO THE ROAD, and was promptly slammed by an 18-wheeler.
*Note* For all sick perverted fucks, this does not mean "had sex with." The dog was killed, and was not "fucked in the bum-bum" by any means necessary.
The driver of the truck noticed what he had done, and immediately ripped open his shirt, and bellowed with intensity unmatched by any human ever before.
The authorities were called, the man arrested, the puppies... never born.
What happened to the man and woman who were going to eat that horrid fishy substance? Legend and Lore has it that the folks were seen at a zoo many a years later feeding the flamingos.
But no, this be not the truth. For the truth still remains with me.
FOR INDEED THE TRUTH BEITH THAT THE MAN AND WOMAN WERE SEVERELY INJURED BY A PACK OF TREE WEILDING PHANTOM INFESTED DEVIL DWARFS OF DOOM!
A sad story, with a sadder ending.
Shortly thereafter the incident, a man of short stature entered the hospital ward, and warned the patients of pure evil and doom in the near future. He described it as being a day of pure and utter...
"Very Mournful"
WHADDAFAHH? You scream in utter disbelief. Well count your hippos before they multply, for when this happens.. you will have a lot of hippos.
User Reviews
Submitted by munkeypants (user info) at 2004-07-30 22:27:30 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
It all makes sense now
Submitted by Quartermain (user info) at 2004-05-28 20:07:10 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
I don't know, I thought this was funny.
Submitted by ohlookasquirrel (user info) at 2004-05-28 18:56:14 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
AHAHAHAHAHA I KNOOOOWWWW WHOOOO YOUUUUU ARRREEEE
okay, maybe not.
Sh.
Submitted by Donitsu2002 (user info) at 2004-05-27 20:19:51 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
Awesome, I'd donkey punch that 18 wheeler if i was the dog.....
Submitted by FearBenzene (user info) at 2004-05-27 20:17:45 EDT (#)
Ranking: 1
No Comment
Submitted by mystiamoon (user info) at 2004-05-27 20:14:30 EDT (#)
Ranking: 1
Hmmmmmm......
Submitted by Adona (user info) at 2004-05-27 19:48:43 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
Great. Sure. Whatever.
Submitted by lojope (user info) at 2004-05-27 19:45:29 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
Again I say, I laughed.
Submitted by digsy (user info) at 2004-05-27 19:40:54 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
This was great, very python-esque
Submitted by DraconianKing (user info) at 2004-05-27 19:37:30 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
It was very odd but I liked it.
Submitted by Rainer (user info) at 2004-05-27 19:18:47 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
Welcome to the world of Extasy!
Submitted by Dufflady (user info) at 2004-05-27 19:12:32 EDT (#)
Ranking: 0
Odd...just odd
Submitted by tlozoot (user info) at 2004-05-27 18:49:36 EDT (#)
Ranking: -1
Not horrible, but...
Submitted by lojope (user info) at 2004-05-27 18:47:36 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
I laughed really hard actually...
Submitted by Yes (user info) at 2004-05-27 18:46:47 EDT (#)
Ranking: 1
No Comment
Submitted by maiorano84 (user info) at 2004-05-27 18:43:48 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
I'm sorry, but this made me laugh. I know this is gonna get flamed though.