My Last Hedgehog (633 hits)
Category: Quotes & StoriesRating: 0.62 on 16 reviews (Rate this item) (V)
Submitted by Euripides Trousers (View user info) at 2004-05-28 10:11:46 EDT
Cromack did what dogs do. He ran to me, jowls grin-wrinkled, with a hedgehog held painfully delicately between his teeth. By now, he was lifting with fleas, nits and ticks - all streaming from the hedgehog's fecund body onto his face, like raindrops on a speeding visor.
My nebulous innocence toyed with making a companion of that find. Atavism, though, made a compelling argument to a bored adolescent alone in the woods.
How do you end a thing that is born not to die, but to begin? I bludgeoned it with a rock. Its spines cosseted it against the blows. I kicked it, chafing my boots, but it rolled through the forest detritus unharmed. Finally, I drowned it. It took 15 minutes, and was harrowing - that living thing, without pity or remorse, only knew how to live. My tears leaked into the stream where I erased its final visceral breath in a small cloud of bubbles, as I simply, solidly, silently stood on it. Those bubbles wouldn't have seemed out of place in a chilled glass of fine Champagne.
In the hollow of my victory, I made a pyre. I gently covered the small carcass with clay from the stream banks, and then baked it. Before it was charred, I took it from the fire, peeled back its tomb, and ate it down to the skeleton. I was surprised at how small it was, and how little it satiated me. I gave Cromack a piece, which he swallowed instantly - like the disenfranchised taking a Valium.
That beautiful animal remains as just that, indelible in my memory. I loved life more after that day, alone in the woods.
User Reviews
Submitted by tuesdaydelay (user info) at 2004-06-17 15:34:46 EDT (#)
Ranking: -2
Who cares?
http://www.ubersite.com/m/36012
Submitted by mikethescottish (user info) at 2004-06-07 11:13:40 EDT (#)
Ranking: 1
Not bad, not bad at all.
Submitted by Scotsman (user info) at 2004-06-07 10:52:02 EDT (#)
Ranking: 0
Bizarre!
Submitted by wazzawazzayo (user info) at 2004-06-07 10:36:43 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
Pretty damn good. Do some more.
Submitted by SausageKing (user info) at 2004-05-28 17:36:27 EDT (#)
Ranking: 1
Looks like someone owns a thesaurus!
Submitted by Envenom (user info) at 2004-05-28 17:16:49 EDT (#)
Ranking: 1
You know what would be really fucking hilarious? If you responded to all these posters with a "No Comment."
Submitted by Burn (user info) at 2004-05-28 15:21:24 EDT (#)
Ranking: 0
little psycho trying to break free are you?
Submitted by AshK (user info) at 2004-05-28 15:06:00 EDT (#)
Ranking: 1
While I am far from illiterate, fewer $10.00 words would be appreciated. A well placed word that is rarely used is a beautiful thing, but I think too many and it is a hindrance to the story.
Submitted by munkeypants (user info) at 2004-05-28 12:40:53 EDT (#)
Ranking: 0
+1 good writing
-1 strange
Submitted by Circe (user info) at 2004-05-28 12:40:16 EDT (#)
Ranking: 1
Your "-1 No Comment" reviews are scattered through Ubersite like tainted little easter eggs. I came to read this, gleefully rubbing my hands together at the idea of returning the favour.
Damn you for being able to write.
Submitted by Envenom (user info) at 2004-05-28 12:22:52 EDT (#)
Ranking: 1
Wow, so you CAN actually type. I thought maybe your keyboard only consisted of 0's, 1's and 2's.
Submitted by BLITZKREIG_BOB (user info) at 2004-05-28 12:22:32 EDT (#)
Ranking: 1
No Comment
Submitted by Fleadh (user info) at 2004-05-28 12:15:52 EDT (#)
Ranking: 1
I liked it, Perhaps an over use of "big words" but interesting nonetheless.
C
Submitted by Dervel (user info) at 2004-05-28 11:37:35 EDT (#)
Ranking: 0
Euripides trousers, you menda these trousers. It's what he would have wanted.
Young Ones reference?
Submitted by Lucky (user info) at 2004-05-28 10:55:16 EDT (#)
Ranking: 0
I can't get my mind around this.
Submitted by youarsoghey (user info) at 2004-05-28 10:21:40 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
Bizarre, but I liked it.