My first blind date (1080 hits)
Category: NoneRating: -0.9 on 14 reviews (Rate this item) (V)
Submitted by Scotsman (View user info) at 2004-06-01 10:45:23 EDT
Allright people,
I don't know how this will go down but I imagine I will get flamed to death over this one. Anyway I had moved to a new city and I didn't know too many people. As you do in these situations you go out and get hammered on a regular basis with the people you do know/new workmates and make a tit of yourself pulling every women you see. Anyway I was being quite succesful but, and this is where I'll get slagged, I was getting bored of mindless drunken sex and wanted to meet someone cool that I could have sex with and yes have a conversation. Anyway I signed up for internet dating. It is an interesting place this world of internet dating! Anyway I end up chatting away with a few lassies and finally one of them suggest meeting up.
I turn up a few minutes early. I have no real idea of what she looks like so every passing women got a really close look as they passed...I am surprised the police were never called to haul away the staring nutter on the main street!! Anyway the date is late! Of course, bloody women hahahah. Anyway the town I stay in Scotland is notorious for very large seagulls and yes you guessed it one of them shat on me! Fortuanatly the blind date continued to be late so I ran off to a pub to get cleaned up. Feeling a bit nervous beforehand this took all of that away as I thought it cannot get much worse.
Anyway finally she shows up......yeah not my type....shit! Oh well we might have a good laugh together. We go off to a pub and we start talking. quite quickly I realise this is not going to be wedding bells hahahah She orders coffee liquor (sp??) for a start....anyway we both get a little pissed and yes I ended up snogging her but then like bloody cindarella she ups and says she has to go home at midnight! Pain in the arse this as it was too late to use my back up plan of meeting my mates and yet I was loaded enough to want to party! Bastard!!
That is pretty much the end....hmmm....yeah I am going to get flamed for this!!
Scotsman
P.S. She texted the next day to say she felt we were too different and i never saw her again so I went out and got laid the old fashioned way :)
User Reviews
Submitted by Scotsman (user info) at 2004-06-02 03:45:44 EDT (#)
Ranking: 0
Well I had a feeling it would suck. Basically hammered it down whilst at work.
Thanks for the help Loren. Next time I won't spew my drivel straight out.
As for the manic laughter....that is just a bad habit I have got into on e-mails.
Cheers.
Submitted by Loren1 (user info) at 2004-06-01 16:17:29 EDT (#)
Ranking: 1
Scotsman - I think you sound like a really decent guy. So if you're ok with it, I'd like to offer a little constructive critisism:
Try to not use a thousand "anyway(s)" throughout your writing, and please, you can totally eliminate all the "hahahaha(s)" - nobody wants to read, see, or hear someone who constantly laughs at their own stories/jokes.
On another note, you come across to me as very honest, and I appreciate that.
*smooch*
Loren
Submitted by Yams (user info) at 2004-06-01 15:43:04 EDT (#)
Ranking: 0
Make it funny next time--make me laugh! And learn what commas (,) are for. You have the annoying talent of using "yes" in all the wrong places; lose it. Shat is a funny word.
Submitted by wazzawazzayo (user info) at 2004-06-01 13:31:45 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
I hate the fucking French.
Submitted by Caulaincourt (user info) at 2004-06-01 13:15:34 EDT (#)
Ranking: -1
Stop laughing like a lunitic in the hahahaha middle of sentences.
Submitted by Big_Poppa_Tom (user info) at 2004-06-01 13:02:09 EDT (#)
Ranking: -2
She had to go home at midnight, is she fucking 14.
Submitted by AlwaysAnEagle (user info) at 2004-06-01 12:32:41 EDT (#)
Ranking: -2
Stin, yes.
This was barely coherent.
Submitted by Graeme Souness <tacheman> at 2004-06-01 12:21:11 EDT (#)
Ranking: 0
snogging = french kissing
Submitted by Stin (user info) at 2004-06-01 11:27:36 EDT (#)
Ranking: -1
The only redeeming feature was the use of the word "snogging" - tell me, is that "making out" in American?!
Submitted by lojope (user info) at 2004-06-01 11:12:33 EDT (#)
Ranking: -2
This was boring.
Submitted by kai070169 (user info) at 2004-06-01 10:58:57 EDT (#)
Ranking: -2
I preferred the episode where you died in a fire & came back to haunt Bart & Lisa in their dreams, and Maggie killed you by putting her soother in the air vent of your gigantic bagpipe body. Now THAT'S entertainment!
Submitted by munkeypants (user info) at 2004-06-01 10:58:50 EDT (#)
Ranking: -1
"I ended up snogging her ..."
snogging? that phrase was worth a +1
Submitted by BillsSBChamps (user info) at 2004-06-01 10:51:41 EDT (#)
Ranking: -2
This was 43% shit, 14% crap,13% dead baby, and 30% fuck off, which adds up to STOP POSTING SHIT.
Submitted by Scotsman (user info) at 2004-06-01 10:48:24 EDT (#)
Ranking: 0
Don't even bother with this....this man's is far better! Guess I better learn to write funnier....bit tricky at work though :)
http://www.ubersite.com/m/34694