How to never get burned by this site@work (913 hits)
Category: Computers & InternetRating: 0.77 on 19 reviews (Rate this item) (V)
Submitted by D7 (View user info) at 2004-06-08 09:23:11 EDT
So I've been stealing money from my company by spending time looking at the plethora of fine stories and other collections of nonsense that Uber has to offer. I have on occasion, come across an unmarked NSFW post.
The moment I see a picture loading, my blood starts to run cold. I try to have faith in humanity, and hope this ass-monkey hasn't actually posted some naked something or other. It never fails though, that at least once every few weeks I'm confronted with an ass or a pair of tits that was not marked NSFW. (The most recent was a post on body modification that had a naked tattooed chick on it) Initially panic hits me like a bucket of ice water. It washes over me and I quickly hit the back button. I wheel around like a man who forgets to look both ways and suddenly hears a truck horn to his left. Had anyone seen what I had? Had an attractive yet, feminist coworker just itching to file a sexual harassment claim seen what had been on my screen? Not, yet. I quickly delete all files from my internet catch and clear the history folder.
I work at a large company with a large IT department. For the next hour or so I expect to receive a call telling me that I'm fired for inappropriate use of the company internet. I'm a recovering masterbate-aholic, ( See http://www.ubersite.com/m/28312) (Oh my god, he's pimping one of his old posts what a fucker!), so I can't take these violent emotional swings. I've found a 100% safe way to surf Uber. I go to my internet advanced options (see pic below), and uncheck the show pictures box. This way I can choose the pictures to be displayed. If I trust the user who posts the pic, I right click on it and show the picture.
But anyway, I'm sure most of you are COMPUTER GODS and don't want to be bothered with such suggestions, but I'm sure it will help some of you.
User Reviews
Submitted by DetroitCity (user info) at 2004-07-08 19:48:53 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
I use this site from home, but a nice little bit o knowledge
Submitted by JMcBride (user info) at 2004-07-08 17:48:53 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
Robot9698 is gay
Submitted by Robot9698 (user info) at 2004-07-08 15:05:46 EDT (#)
Ranking: -2
No Comment
Submitted by dakingisdead (user info) at 2004-06-08 22:03:33 EDT (#)
Ranking: -2
Submitted by lawryde (user info) at 2004-06-04 10:51:37 (#)
Ranking: -2
I wish everyone was the same...
..............................................................................................
And because I am a bitch have a minus two for the shitty nonsense you left as a review on that post.
Submitted by dakingisdead (user info) at 2004-06-08 22:00:55 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
Thanks for the reference to the post dude.
The reason that there was no NSFW on that post was twofold.
1 I forgot and hit the button before realising I hadn't attached it.
2 I am tired of opening other peoples posts with allsorts of crazy shit in them that do not have any warning and hide under innocuous titles.
As far as whether you should be looking at Uber at all at your work is your problem. I would probably sack your arse if I was your boss for no other reason than you are wasting the companies time.
Submitted by facts (user info) at 2004-06-08 18:48:21 EDT (#)
Ranking: 0
ssh is all you need
Submitted by fluff (user info) at 2004-06-08 14:22:39 EDT (#)
Ranking: 0
What about not doing these things on office computers then? Oh...i forgot...your missy at home would not like that, too...shame for all the managers with thai-boy-fetish...
Submitted by FilthyAssistant (user info) at 2004-06-08 14:11:36 EDT (#)
Ranking: 0
Nice idea, but that only stops the 'being overlooked' factor. You have to remember that most IT depts are staffed by vicious psychopaths who don't play well with others (trust me, i work in one) and they probably know more about you than your mother does. Our particular setup scans for keywords and fires off an email to me anytime anyone does anything remotely dodgy. We can also see what you type into search engines. God help you if you're a particularly unpleasant manager, as the internet reports detailing a search for "young thai boys" have been known to be 'accidentally' emailed to all said managers underlings. Always be nice to techies - they know how much you're getting paid and how much you spent on leather fetish gear last month.
Submitted by loki (user info) at 2004-06-08 14:05:59 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
Christ, I'm there. I don't know where, but somewhere yesterday I picked up some spyware and since I don't have admin rights to this computer, there isn't anything I can do about it. Right now on uber, it looks like there are hyperlinks on everything. I thought Bart might be screwing around with the site so I clicked on one where I mentioned Smarty Jones and it took me to a horse race betting site. Well, it tried to but it froze up and I got an error message. Yea, pretty sure that's not Bart's doing. I have a call into tech support. The surfing is bad enough, but Explorer keeps freezing up on the site I use to pull up reports for work. It's annoying as hell. For sure they're going to give me crap for this. I hate those fuckers who sabotage the internet.
Submitted by munkeypants (user info) at 2004-06-08 13:13:39 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
I know! I am so afraid of what is going to pop up on my screen!
My ass would be grass if my boss caught me.
Thanks for the tip!
Submitted by I_Have_a_Kristen_Fetish (user info) at 2004-06-08 11:50:47 EDT (#)
Ranking: 0
Not a bad idea. But what if they flag you by keywords?
Submitted by fluff (user info) at 2004-06-08 10:04:37 EDT (#)
Ranking: 1
For your concern....
Submitted by lawryde (user info) at 2004-06-08 09:34:38 EDT (#)
Ranking: 0
Like I said, I don't even want to risk having lesbians spraying shit on each other even up on my screen. Who knows who may be looking over my shoulder.
Submitted by digsy (user info) at 2004-06-08 09:34:08 EDT (#)
Ranking: 1
Nice tip, but if I was boss, I wouldn't care if you were looking at a pair of tits or reading about the news. Either way you're not doing work. Pull yer finger out!
Submitted by BLITZKREIG_BOB (user info) at 2004-06-08 09:31:54 EDT (#)
Ranking: 1
The downside to window washer is that it wipes out any saved passwords. I'm on my 3rd uber account because I never remembered my passwords.
Submitted by jeeves (user info) at 2004-06-08 09:31:36 EDT (#)
Ranking: 1
Jeeves works at home, but good suggestion anyway
Submitted by BLITZKREIG_BOB (user info) at 2004-06-08 09:30:02 EDT (#)
Ranking: 1
Download Window Washer.
It clears caches, cookies, document history, all temp files, etc.
This way if I come across a seemingly normal post that actually has lesbians spraying diarrhea on each other, I can destroy the evidence on my machine.
Submitted by WillZone (user info) at 2004-06-08 09:27:52 EDT (#)
Ranking: 0
thanks
Submitted by itchy (user info) at 2004-06-08 09:26:36 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
This will help me, so +2 for you.
Good luck in your recovery.