Prelude to a Raid (656 hits)
Category: NoneRating: -0.07 on 15 reviews (Rate this item) (V)
Submitted by tshia (View user info) at 2004-06-10 04:38:54 EDT
Its design was rather eclectic; this was a necessity. One hundred different master architects, on a hundred different worlds, of a hundred species had had their hand in designing it; the effect was not ascetically pleasing.
The starship hung in the dark chasm of space, all alone. By itself in the vast expanse it would have been impossible to judge its size, there was nothing to compare it to. In actuality this ship was quite large, from end to end it was nearly 30,000 miles, its mass was almost 5 million yotagrams, and the crew was 14 trillion. One end the ship extended in long bladed beak, this section was commonly recognized as the front, behind the beak were a series of bulbous spheres branching off of which were several thick tentacle shaped tubes, the rear of the ship was akin to the back half of a cube. Every surface of the ship was marked, by turrets made to fire projectiles or to release bursts of concentrated energy, or with orifices to launch smaller space craft, high yield missiles, or long range probes, and with giant black scars and craters which were mementos of former confrontations. The ship had power enough to destroy planets, to move stars, to warp space itself, and yet it waited patiently, to meet its better.
Another spacecraft appeared suddenly, one moment the first ship was alone, the next it had company. This new craft was much smaller, barely a spec in relation to the first. Onboard the first ship computerized warning systems began screaming the newcomer's presence, the first ship began to prepare, and the second ship began to move closer.
Onboard the first ship the human Don Andor was awakened by his aide, a creature who went only by the name of Twi'lu. Twi'lu was a small humanoid creature, his skin was pale blue he had an abnormally large head and where his arms might have been instead were two long tentacles. "My lord, the emissary of the crown is here" it called.
A few minutes later Don arrived at the control deck via a web of transportation tunnels that ran entirely through the ship. The tunnels were wide enough to fit a small vehicle, and the occupant inside was propelled quickly through them by the means of artificial gravity. As Don exited the tunnel Twi'lu was a second behind him. Don strode onto the control deck, there were a dozen different beings of varied species operating controls and computers necessary to maintain and control the ship. Those creatures were as expected, the newcomers were not. They were the same race as Twi'lu, there were three of them and they stood together, tentacles clutching computer pads they cackled to each other in their own inaudible language.
Don stood 7 feet tall and was a muscular 280 lbs, about the standard human male; he was dressed with a regal purple cape that was draped over his long black robes. On his head was a crown of gold embedded in which were precious gems from a multitude of different worlds. One of the newcomers greeted him "High Lord Andor of the space faring vessel Omnicide I presume?" the creature inquired, it did not seem very interested in either the question or the response.
"Of course" Don replied glibly.
"May we ask what business you believe you have on sector 3.1134A-21.34B?" Again the creature seemed bored, not at all what one would expect from a guard of restricted space.
"Of course, excuse me for just a moment" Don made a hurried gesture and turned to a large multiple armed insect who was manipulating a large control panel and barked out an order in a language unknown be the three visitors a control was pressed and a screen behind them came to life. It showed another the spaceship, the three knew it as the flagship of their guardian fleet, and this ship was responsible for protecting sector 3.1134A-21.34B from any illegal intruders.
"What is the meaning of this High Lord?" The three had lost their blaze air; they were beginning to get nervous.
"Oh I just intend to show you what we are doing here" Don smiled and made a gesture with his hand. There was an audible moan from the Omnicide and then across the monitor on the wall streaked a bright green beam. It hit the flagship and tore a hole through it. The screen then displayed a flight of missiles bombarding it with hydrogen bombs, the guard ship shattered into a billion tiny splinters.
The three emissaries were now desperate "You have attacked a ship belonging to the Crown! Explain your actions immediately" They began to shriek something else but were cut off by the loud crack of projectile weapons. In a moment they were reduced to three bullet riddled corpses.
The attack proceeded as planned, the royal garrison had been caught by surprise, their flagship had been destroyed before it could activate its defensive screens and the Omnicide had already launched its fleets of smaller ships. The resulting battle was fierce but one sided, most importantly no Imperial ships escaped. Wave space interference generated by the Omnicide prevented any outgoing communications from the attacked garrison.
Later that day Don would issue a report with his royal seal that he had encountered the remains of the royal fleet at the perimeter of sector 3.1134A-21.34B, and that it was likely destroyed by rouges.
User Reviews
Submitted by shitfuck (user info) at 2004-06-12 13:40:25 EDT (#)
Ranking: -2
Awe-inspiring
Submitted by tshia (user info) at 2004-06-12 01:57:43 EDT (#)
Ranking: 0
wow snuggles you actually went back to minus 2 posts, that takes class
Submitted by Snuggles_The_Assassin (user info) at 2004-06-11 00:07:52 EDT (#)
Ranking: 0
Submitted by maiorano84 (user info) at 2004-06-11 00:03:26 (#)
Ranking: 2
I never read it, but this is to counter those fuckers who -2 for no reason.
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Fag.
Submitted by maiorano84 (user info) at 2004-06-11 00:03:26 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
I never read it, but this is to counter those fuckers who -2 for no reason.
Submitted by Snuggles_The_Assassin (user info) at 2004-06-10 23:47:39 EDT (#)
Ranking: 0
My next post: Prelude To a Shit, a Fart.
Submitted by Snuggles_The_Assassin (user info) at 2004-06-10 23:41:10 EDT (#)
Ranking: -2
Oops forgot the +2.
Submitted by Snuggles_The_Assassin (user info) at 2004-06-10 23:40:06 EDT (#)
Ranking: -2
I think you're fat but can I fuck your ass then cum in your hair?
Submitted by conrad (user info) at 2004-06-10 17:10:37 EDT (#)
Ranking: 1
Oops, forgot the +1
Submitted by conrad (user info) at 2004-06-10 12:05:30 EDT (#)
Ranking: 0
Decent prose, though somewhat plagued with run-on sentences. Otherwise good, and though I don't like sci-fi, +1
Submitted by Tom (user info) at 2004-06-10 10:34:59 EDT (#)
Ranking: -1
You CAN do much better.
Submitted by lojope (user info) at 2004-06-10 10:18:23 EDT (#)
Ranking: -1
No Comment
Submitted by Thanatos (user info) at 2004-06-10 09:18:20 EDT (#)
Ranking: 0
Not too bad. Writing was decent, could use a little polishing, especially the dialogue. Also, the size of the ship seemed impractical and exaggerated, more cartoonish than futuristic.
Submitted by JewToastJr (user info) at 2004-06-10 05:24:58 EDT (#)
Ranking: -2
Jr. doesn't think so.
Submitted by Magicaddict (user info) at 2004-06-10 05:23:29 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
Yay for SciFi, although it looks a little like an attempt to outdo Iain M. Banks.
Submitted by Avals (user info) at 2004-06-10 05:04:54 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
Weird, yet interesting.
Proofreading wouldn't hurt though.