The Trix Rabbit's Reprisal- Bloodbath in the bank (939 hits)
Category: NoneRating: -0.75 on 33 reviews (Rate this item) (V)
Submitted by Tom (View user info) at 2004-06-13 13:36:55 EDT
"Ooh, I'm gonna kill 'em all", he whispered fiendishly to himself. "Kill them ALL!!" He laughed out loud and cocked the Colt Python resting in his hand. Holding such a powerful gun made him feel strangely aroused, and he giggled to himself.
After a couple of minutes he realised he should get this over and done with, so he steadied himself, opened the car door and rushed out, chains of bullets flying behind him, wrapped around his torso. He ran straight through the glass wall and through the display of sample leaflets and freebie calculators, spraying them across the floor. He cackled insanely as he sprinted to the front desk, shards of glass all over his face and embedded in his eyes, blood streaming down his face.
"GAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA!!!!!!!!!" He bawled as he started shooting the old people picking up their pensions, blowing off limbs with every shot. Completely covered in blood, he reloaded his gun with his splintered, blooding stump-like fingers, still muttering crazily to himself. He looked at the woman behind the glass's face and realised it was actually Samuel L. Jackson in a wig, beard and all. He pulled the wig off and said "Man, I've seen some crazy-ass shit in my time, but-" and the Trix Rabbit interrupted him, by shooting a hole through his afro.
"Sheeeet, negro, thasall you had to saaaay!" shouted Jackson, pulling out a gun and blowing his head off.
The trix rabbit reciprocated and shot his dick off, closing his eyes in exstacy as the blood oozed out of his crotch and down his leg. The sweet, sweet pain brought him -somehow- to orgasm, and he fell backwards through a glass table and impaled himself on its sharpened leg.
Thus is the demise of the Trix Bunny. May he rest in paled. (PUN!!111LOLOMGROF)
(More photographs of the countryside around my house next week!)
User Reviews
Submitted by iddqd (user info) at 2004-06-15 03:23:44 EDT (#)
Ranking: -2
lojope, just bite the bullet and admit it. you rated this post because of the name, its okay - no biggie, no loss of respect or anything; but for you to sit there and try to defend yourself and give any sort of validation to this post to try and hide the fact you gave it +1 cos it had tom on the top, just looks stupid.
this post is shit.
Submitted by misanthrope (user info) at 2004-06-15 03:13:08 EDT (#)
Ranking: -1
That is quite possibly the shiitiest picture I have ever seen.
Submitted by lojope (user info) at 2004-06-14 15:20:57 EDT (#)
Ranking: -2
Well, you are going to think what you want either way. But I am not the only person who rated this positively. And I did the same thing before when someone wrote a post I liked but then found out they lied and it wasn't their own work. Lying and Theiving = -2 there also, even though that post was awesome and deserving of a +2 based on writing alone.
So think what you want. You are a liar, so what the hell do I care?
Submitted by ubersucks (user info) at 2004-06-14 15:06:40 EDT (#)
Ranking: 0
Lojo, you have been caught out you hypocrite. I was expecting someone to give this a positive rating because it was Tom. Hahaha. None of this bullshit about -2 for being a liar. You suck.
Submitted by lojope (user info) at 2004-06-14 10:06:18 EDT (#)
Ranking: -2
Actually no, I did truly think it was a +1 because I thought this whole series was interesting. The structure and grammar are not appalling, the descriptions are vivid, and I enjoy when writers step outside their own little comfort zone and try something new. Therefore +1.
But lying and theiving -2.
Submitted by iddqd (user info) at 2004-06-13 23:58:54 EDT (#)
Ranking: -2
sorry lojope, this was at NO stage a +1 post, it wasnt even a 0 post. you rated it on the basis of the name, but realising the shitty quality of the writing, couldnt bring yourself to sully even the overused whore that is the +2.
this was nothing like what tom usually writes, even when hes acting his age. the second i finished it, i checked the user info and sure enough it wasnt tom. to take these words seriously as toms is more of an insult to him than anything anyone ahs said to or about him.
yidele, you just look like a total dick for doing that.
Submitted by iddqd (user info) at 2004-06-13 23:53:36 EDT (#)
Ranking: -2
way to go user 4303.
Submitted by My_dixie_wrecked (user info) at 2004-06-13 21:25:24 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
Did you know there was a Johnny Boy before me? My name is unoriginal and uninspired.
Submitted by My_dixie_wrecked (user info) at 2004-06-13 21:23:59 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
There couldn't possibly be two people on ubersite with the name Tom.
Submitted by dakingisdead (user info) at 2004-06-13 20:57:30 EDT (#)
Ranking: -2
Silly.
Submitted by lojope (user info) at 2004-06-13 20:43:58 EDT (#)
Ranking: 0
Submitted by Can_Always_Trust_A_Liar (user info) at 2004-06-13 18:33:12 (#)
Ranking: 0
lojope, I don't mean to criticize, but when you thought this was Tom, you gave it a +1. albeit you mentioned it wasn't up to snuff, but since you discovered it was NOT Tom, you have given it two -2's. i realize this might be because the poster lied or decieved about who the author actually was, but it does look a little, well, ya know.
~*~*~*~*~
Yup, as far as writing is concerned this is a +1 post, whether Tom or anyone else wrote it. However liars get a -2. Liars who also STEAL someone else's story idea get another -2.
Submitted by Can_Always_Trust_A_Liar (user info) at 2004-06-13 18:33:12 EDT (#)
Ranking: 0
lojope, I don't mean to criticize, but when you thought this was Tom, you gave it a +1. albeit you mentioned it wasn't up to snuff, but since you discovered it was NOT Tom, you have given it two -2's. i realize this might be because the poster lied or decieved about who the author actually was, but it does look a little, well, ya know.
Submitted by Yes (user info) at 2004-06-13 18:22:57 EDT (#)
Ranking: 0
bad fake tom, bad!
Submitted by Fluffhead (user info) at 2004-06-13 17:58:16 EDT (#)
Ranking: -2
Don't bother.
Submitted by lojope (user info) at 2004-06-13 17:36:23 EDT (#)
Ranking: -2
Not actually Tom.
Submitted by ohyes (user info) at 2004-06-13 17:13:14 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
beter thn the othesr
Submitted by tsu (user info) at 2004-06-13 16:22:16 EDT (#)
Ranking: -2
Disappointment.
Submitted by Tom at 2004-06-13 16:20:02 EDT (#)
Ranking: -2
I still don't understand why you people blow a load every time you see me post.
Submitted by Tom <On FUCKIN vacation> at 2004-06-13 16:17:03 EDT (#)
Ranking: -2
I go on VACATION and don't poke my head in for a day or two and THIS is what i find. Still some kind of machine allllllllll talking about Tom. Tom Tom Tom Tom Tom.
Tsk tsk, ubersucks. Tsk tsk.
Submitted by yidele (user info) at 2004-06-13 16:04:22 EDT (#)
Ranking: -2
When Tom of darn near anythings writes
I seek in frenzy my daily dose
His style is lame - it really bites
it makes me itch and and vomit prose
tho' sure he is of talent's blessing
to read it you'd have to be blind
It is my duty to enlighten ---
By being cruel I know I'm being kind
Find something else to do - it isn't hard
do something simple - occupy your mind
or buy a sex toy - they're not dear ...
By being cruel I know I'm being kind
straight raise the floodgates of emotion
Sail on the sea of love, your wounds do bind
perhaps you'll find another with like notions...
By telling lies so cruel I know I'm kind
Submitted by sublime (user info) at 2004-06-13 16:02:48 EDT (#)
Ranking: 0
trix rabbit reprisal sounds like creedence clearwater revival, they rock.
Submitted by I_Have_a_Kristen_Fetish (user info) at 2004-06-13 15:55:35 EDT (#)
Ranking: -2
Leave the MS Paint work to Habeeb.
Submitted by jewfuck (user info) at 2004-06-13 15:40:46 EDT (#)
Ranking: -2
|)4 |2331 70/\/\ p\/\/|\|5 u.
Submitted by Spiral_Abraxis (user info) at 2004-06-13 15:21:51 EDT (#)
Ranking: -2
Yeah, I was wondering why this sucked so bad.
Submitted by conrad (user info) at 2004-06-13 14:48:32 EDT (#)
Ranking: 1
Best episode yet.
Submitted by Spooner (user info) at 2004-06-13 14:35:06 EDT (#)
Ranking: 1
This was a 0, then -1, then a 1, -2, 0, and it comes out here. +1.
Congratulations, fuckhole!
Submitted by hcp28 (user info) at 2004-06-13 14:26:44 EDT (#)
Ranking: -2
Fake tom you suck
Submitted by ubersucks (user info) at 2004-06-13 14:26:37 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
AHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA
Submitted by lojope (user info) at 2004-06-13 14:25:21 EDT (#)
Ranking: -2
Asshole
Submitted by youarsoghey (user info) at 2004-06-13 14:08:06 EDT (#)
Ranking: -1
Yeh..this isn't Tom, guys. A simple scroll over the "User Info" button would show that to you.
Submitted by Falconer (user info) at 2004-06-13 14:03:27 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
I don't know why i liked this more than the other 2, but i did. Maybe it was because of Samuel L Jackson. All i know is, this pwns.
Submitted by ubersucks (user info) at 2004-06-13 14:00:54 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
....you're fucking kidding, yeah Lojo? Tell me that was a joke.
Submitted by lojope (user info) at 2004-06-13 13:45:24 EDT (#)
Ranking: 1
Not as good as the other two.