uber treasure hunt - win a scatburger (832 hits)
Category: NoneRating: 0.48 on 75 reviews (Rate this item) (V)
Submitted by Mr Prickle (View user info) at 2004-06-14 20:19:49 EDT
the treasure you must try and find is:
an example of someone who has entered a 'serious' uber debate (politics, sexuality, religion, whatever) and has, as a result of reasoned argument and evidence presented to them by another user, changed their views to a significant degree. and acknowledged this change of view in a grateful and gracious manner.
the reward for the first person able to find such a treasure:
one big juicy scatburger, with all the options.
There is also the less tangible reward of keeping a small flame of hope (for the future of the human race) burning in the heart of Mr Prickle
User Reviews
Submitted by shandythedog (user info) at 2004-06-17 01:37:03 EDT (#)
Ranking: 0
i see mystia. you 'like' conrad, but your feelings for us are just so much stronger...
perfectly understandable.
Submitted by mystiamoon (user info) at 2004-06-16 20:05:08 EDT (#)
Ranking: 0
Thats just my point Prickle.
I like Conrad and he seemed to like me, therefore he cannot be either of you two.
:-P~
Submitted by MrPrickle (user info) at 2004-06-16 19:06:27 EDT (#)
Ranking: 0
insane - wasted??? i suppose now you will claim our phone scat session meant nothing to you, just a frivolous drugged peccadillo? Ah Youth, so fickle and so cruel.
degreeless - well, you don't fully quailify as you didn't acknowledge to alywasandeagle that her argument had swayed you. BUT, you are the only entry and you HAVE demonstrated the key requirement of rudimentary criticial thought. So CONGRATULATIONS! The scatburger is freezer packed an on its way.
mystia - why? conrad does't seem such a bad fellow.
Submitted by mystiamoon (user info) at 2004-06-16 13:25:52 EDT (#)
Ranking: 0
But.....but.....
Conrad can't be one of you two in disguise, he just can't be....
Oh, I am a broken person at the mere possibility.
Submitted by Degreeless_Capibara (user info) at 2004-06-16 13:04:36 EDT (#)
Ranking: 1
Well I'll have to admit that on my gay marraige post, AlwaysAnEagle pretty much made me rethink my points. I never really had strong feelings on the subject, so it wasn't that hard to sway me.
Submitted by Insanethemind (user info) at 2004-06-16 13:00:08 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
Great, I'm glad you've gotten it done with Jamie. I hope the judges see the light.
It was interesting talking to you too, shandy. hahaha pity I was so wasted.
Submitted by MrPrickle (user info) at 2004-06-16 11:22:22 EDT (#)
Ranking: 0
hhahaha!
don't forget to toss a few sloppy seconds to your old pal!
off to bed now, post the conclusion the instant you hear anything.
Submitted by apollo88 (user info) at 2004-06-16 11:13:35 EDT (#)
Ranking: 0
ohhh the cunts i can almost taste 'em
Submitted by MrPrickle (user info) at 2004-06-16 11:07:24 EDT (#)
Ranking: 0
indeed
bit of a shock talking to a real seppo! not many of those in these here parts.
and also odd as i realised you tend to READ things in your OWN voice, so it took a bit of adjustment to associate the voice with the words of his i've read so many of.
after a while though it began to seem quite natural and normal.
pity he hasn't got a pink cunt!
Submitted by apollo88 (user info) at 2004-06-16 10:55:52 EDT (#)
Ranking: 0
cheers for that.
no the other cunts work was hidden.
should hear early next week.
celebration/sorrow drowning will be much the poorer with out your presence old bean.
yes, must get on the blower/mic.
i heard you had a chat with young mr insane the other day?
Submitted by MrPrickle (user info) at 2004-06-16 10:50:59 EDT (#)
Ranking: 0
well, if they don't pick you they are idiots. but i knew that beforehand.
the breast topic really sounds like an inspiration.
did you see what the other cunts came up with?
it actually crossed my mind to send something to the aussie lads mags a few years ago. i was quite impressed by the quality of the writing in them - no great profound insights into the meanig of life etc, but well-written. much better than in the so-called literary journals. was also pleased that they were amusingly crude - one of them had a brilliant little story about some chap using his kid sister's pj's to mop up his wank juice, and her later on wearing them by accident. (actually, that WAS a profound story)
needless to say, i never actually got round to sumbitting anything.
SO FUCKING GOOD ON YOU FOR HAVING THE GUTS TO DO ALL THIS STUFF!!!!
when do you hear the verdict?? i really wish i was over there to either join in the celebrations or the drowning of sorrows.
from what you've said, you might represent the bolder choice for the selection panel. if they are conservative they might prefer someone a bit 'safer'. but you must be in with a REALLY BIG fucking chance.
again, well done! whatever happens, mighty apollo has made his mark!
once we get on the blower or the mike or whatever i will grill you for more details.
Submitted by apollo88 (user info) at 2004-06-16 10:18:19 EDT (#)
Ranking: 0
limbo.
Submitted by MrPrickle (user info) at 2004-06-16 10:15:25 EDT (#)
Ranking: 0
sounds like you did exactly what you should have.
are you in limbo waiting a result, or have you got the fucking word yet???????????
Submitted by apollo88 (user info) at 2004-06-16 10:12:56 EDT (#)
Ranking: 0
that is it.
waht do you reckon?
gruelling one hour though!
Submitted by MrPrickle (user info) at 2004-06-16 10:07:43 EDT (#)
Ranking: 0
is that the last test?
i imagine you got the fucking guernsy!
or is there some dreadful final twist?
Submitted by apollo88 (user info) at 2004-06-16 10:03:30 EDT (#)
Ranking: 0
I had to go first which sucked.
The essence of what i said was :
" to me, writing is conversation. I am not writing for you, I am talking to you.
the beauty of writing is i don't have to look you in the eye, you are not distracted by my stunning beauty (big laugh) you are listening to what i have to say.
and i have lots to say.
most of it is ill thought out drivel (self depreciation always helps don't you think) but i can guarantee that most of the time it will be entertaining drivel.
kind of like the royal family. (bigger laugh!)
the narrator is me, the narrator is my friends, the narrator is everyone i have ever met, liked, loved, hated and fucked behind a club in the rain with no jimmy on.
that to me is writing."
or some such nonsense.
everyone else was very wordy and started talking about the power for good of the written word, toppling tyrants etc. I was thinking 'jesus this is for ***** magazine, what do they give a fuck for??'
so my jokey approach either worked or didn't.
what do you think then?
Submitted by MrPrickle (user info) at 2004-06-16 09:59:21 EDT (#)
Ranking: 0
sober???
what an ordeal!
Submitted by apollo88 (user info) at 2004-06-16 09:56:14 EDT (#)
Ranking: 0
the third bit was to stand up and tell the people assembled what I think makes a good columnist/writer.
i had to fill 5mins whic doesn't sound a great deal but fuck me. jebus it was hard.
Submitted by apollo88 (user info) at 2004-06-16 09:54:37 EDT (#)
Ranking: 0
sorry mate.
i trimmed a bit and cut a bit of scene setting, i thought it lost a bit of the humour but needs must.
that was the absolute minimium. 400, blob on.
man, i was sweating like i was doing manual labour.
Submitted by MrPrickle (user info) at 2004-06-16 09:50:27 EDT (#)
Ranking: 0
just to remind you, it's 1230 am here, and i have not a drop to drink
i gather you pumped it out a bit faster in the fucking contest???????
Submitted by apollo88 (user info) at 2004-06-16 09:44:21 EDT (#)
Ranking: 0
so
Submitted by apollo88 (user info) at 2004-06-16 09:37:41 EDT (#)
Ranking: 0
yes indeed (economical isn't a dig at lazy cunt is it???!!!)
it was tricky.
so, I basically changed the structure a little, i had a big build up to revealing iw ould talk about man breasts so i cut that and other trims here and there.
still couldn't get the wordage, ws stuck at 480-ish.
I was really stuck then.
Submitted by MrPrickle (user info) at 2004-06-16 09:32:11 EDT (#)
Ranking: 0
interesting
you are very economical writer anyway, one of your strengths. so must have been very tricky.
Submitted by apollo88 (user info) at 2004-06-16 09:30:12 EDT (#)
Ranking: 0
i were were told to read our articles (he had copied them of course), delete them and do the same article again without losing detail in 400 words.
that was rock hard i tell you.
Submitted by apollo88 (user info) at 2004-06-16 09:28:34 EDT (#)
Ranking: 0
next bit was a bit of a shocker.
Submitted by MrPrickle (user info) at 2004-06-16 09:22:20 EDT (#)
Ranking: 0
on with it man!
Submitted by apollo88 (user info) at 2004-06-16 09:12:12 EDT (#)
Ranking: 0
glad you think so!
Submitted by MrPrickle (user info) at 2004-06-16 08:47:07 EDT (#)
Ranking: 0
the man breasts!
brilliant!
what an inspiration!
Submitted by MrPrickle (user info) at 2004-06-16 08:46:09 EDT (#)
Ranking: 0
i can't stand the suspense. must have a ciggie. if only i had some whisky. if only i could actually maintain a fucking drinks cabinent like most civilised adults.
Submitted by apollo88 (user info) at 2004-06-16 08:45:53 EDT (#)
Ranking: 0
good guesses, hw well you know me!
but wrong.
something close to my heart.......
man breasts and the struggle to get rid of them
my breast are after all close to my heart!
that way i can talk about burgers and beer and footy and all laddish things!
(this is after all a lads mag!!!)
clever eh?
Submitted by MrPrickle (user info) at 2004-06-16 08:43:56 EDT (#)
Ranking: 0
800 words in 20 minutes
fuck!!!
not easy. very daunting really, for me anyway being a bit of a slowpoke.
my guesses as to your topic:
- liverpool mangager sacking
- england defeat by france
-cumgaurd theft, sticky keyboard
-osama bin laden matters
Submitted by apollo88 (user info) at 2004-06-16 08:35:51 EDT (#)
Ranking: 0
because a lot of it was adapted and toned down uber stuff, some of it was a bit embarrassing and i don't know, i just wanted to keep things close to my chest.
most of it was before i knew you anyway.
Submitted by apollo88 (user info) at 2004-06-16 08:34:20 EDT (#)
Ranking: 0
so, matt then says the format of todays interview/contest will be in three parts.
the first part will be a 800 word article on a subject close to your heart.
you have 20 minutes.
now what do you reckon i wrote about bearing in mind the question?
Submitted by MrPrickle (user info) at 2004-06-16 08:33:05 EDT (#)
Ranking: 0
btw grasshopper, how come you never showed me any of this shit??
Submitted by MrPrickle (user info) at 2004-06-16 08:31:48 EDT (#)
Ranking: 0
excellent ploy, most in character
Submitted by apollo88 (user info) at 2004-06-16 08:19:58 EDT (#)
Ranking: 0
got to the venue 5 mins early, there was six guys, we were all chatting away when one of them whom had been pretending to be a contestant annouced he was the adjuicator.
sneaky cunt.
so he told us the format of the thing which was as follows :
'Matt' - We already know you five are good, young writers from the north west as we have been binning your unsolicited shit for months.
Everyone : laughs. Except me, I with a stony face said "binning my shit? MY shit? right fuck this I am out of here"
Everyone : shocked silence.
Me : nah I am just fucking with you.
Everyone : silence.
Matt : smirks. calls me a wanker.
Me : nods in agreement.
that was the start, bit risky but seemed to work.
Submitted by MrPrickle (user info) at 2004-06-16 08:18:38 EDT (#)
Ranking: 0
i feel i need a stiff drink and a ciggie
my heart is aflutter!!
Submitted by MrPrickle (user info) at 2004-06-16 08:13:00 EDT (#)
Ranking: 0
my man!
what gives?????
Submitted by apollo88 (user info) at 2004-06-16 08:10:36 EDT (#)
Ranking: 0
indeed!
you still around?
Submitted by MrPrickle (user info) at 2004-06-16 07:42:58 EDT (#)
Ranking: 0
momentous events?????
Submitted by MrPrickle (user info) at 2004-06-16 04:18:30 EDT (#)
Ranking: 0
jherick will be jealous
Submitted by Insanethemind (user info) at 2004-06-16 00:33:44 EDT (#)
Ranking: 0
i'm sure that dirtbag whore feels the same, prickle.
Submitted by MrPrickle (user info) at 2004-06-16 00:14:08 EDT (#)
Ranking: 0
cindy's younger sister - glad to know you are still alive. and it was a treat to hear your sweet tones the other day.
Submitted by MrPrickle (user info) at 2004-06-16 00:11:50 EDT (#)
Ranking: 0
just as this conversation was getting interesting last night (though no closer to finding the uber treasure this post sought) my connection dropped out.
reason - wife watering pot plant above tv set-top box/modem.
it seems one of my comments vanished in the process. it was to the effect that at one stage a few weeks ago i had suspected conrad of being apullo, then dismissed the idea. but apullo's recent claims have re-aroused my suspicsions.
assuming CONrad is not dissembling - is that the fucking word you mean apullo, but if he IS dissemblig then he is you or me and therefore.. um. unless he's someone else.
anyway, as it happens i've been working on a series of tests and initiation trials to screen/develop future cccccc members. as insane has pointed out, the ccccc is a mighty and terrible force. exposing the unprepared could cause grave harm. but a canadian foothold is sound thinking.
the next step will be the non-english speaking world. i have greater china and france covered. possibly bangladesh. and good prospects with the krauts. in fact, the kraut i have in mind could be ideal. i must think deeply about the kraut. i'd forgotten about him.
i hope for you sake apullo that circe doesn't see your stephen king remark. btw, that particular book is apparently a collaboration, should look into how it was done.
Submitted by Cindys_Younger_Sister (user info) at 2004-06-15 11:14:23 EDT (#)
Ranking: 0
prickle: that ended up being a few too many V's last night. I woke up at 8 am with absolutely NO memory of doing anything with my friend, or anything elseI did last night, and he was already gone (at 8 am!) which means someone came to pick him up.
Now I wonder, was I a fiendish asshole to him, did he just leave for the sake of leaving, and if so why would he just leave for the sake of leaving? He doesn't work, hasn't got a girlfriend...
fucking pills and alcohol. same old story.
Submitted by apollo88 (user info) at 2004-06-15 09:35:41 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
Well that settles it.
Submitted by conrad (user info) at 2004-06-15 09:20:51 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
I can prove that I'm in Canada - behold my idioms:
"Go Leafs"
"Do pass the maple syrup, there's a good chap."
"Eh"
"I say, that's very large."
"Ohlookamoose"
There - this sets the matter to rest once and for all. Thank you for the condolences.
Submitted by apollo88 (user info) at 2004-06-15 08:58:37 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
The mighty literary genius that is Pickle reading Stephen King?
Surely not!
Submitted by apollo88 (user info) at 2004-06-15 08:56:56 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
If you are indeed an Englishman in exile in the godforsaken backwater of Canada then my felicitations, goodwill and sincerest sympathies are, naturally, extended to you.
Pickle your sucpicions are unfounded and you, yourself are not entirely exonerated of more skullduggery.
I too am investigating further.
If it becomes apparent that this wretch is not disseminating and is indeed acting with integrity then surely we have a vacancy in the CCCCC for a Canada representative??
Submitted by MrPrickle (user info) at 2004-06-15 08:40:11 EDT (#)
Ranking: 0
and apullo, 'conversing' with 'conrad' and 'accusing' me of being 'conrad' are not enough to draw suspicsion away from you, my fine fellow.
Submitted by MrPrickle (user info) at 2004-06-15 08:37:18 EDT (#)
Ranking: 0
yes.
it is not easy to suddenly discover, when you had imagined that you were a man in his prime of life, that you are in fact about 80 years old. and that you could easily pass for the character in the horror novel you hve been reading - the chap who lives in an old people's home and is usually slack jawed and dull-eyed with advanced alzheimers, but occassinally comes to life with an evil grin of inflamed maniacal possession.
those seem to be the only two states the digi camera reveals.
so yes, my thinking is no doubt not clear enough for whatever little game is afoot here.
but i will be making enquiries.
Submitted by conrad (user info) at 2004-06-15 08:35:42 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
Correct, "Apullo" - I am English, from London, and presently live in Toronto on whose shores I washed up by accident some time ago. Eloquence is not solely the preserve of sociopathic Australian scatologists with Dorian Grey complexes....
Submitted by apollo88 (user info) at 2004-06-15 08:27:38 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
So CONrad is not just another alter-ego of Shandythedog?
I find it inconcievable that he is American.
Submitted by conrad (user info) at 2004-06-15 08:16:24 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
Whilst it is concievable that a human could take up residence in ACT (Australian Capital Territory?), it is widely known that nothing aside from rodents, Eskimoes and hat merchants inhabit Liverpool - Sonja is a prime example of what happens when they mate. I fear that you are somewhat off base here Prickle, though this might be perhaps be attributed to the shattered delusions of grandeur that this digital camera has occasioned - "Apullo", on the other hand, is merely wrong.
Submitted by apollo88 (user info) at 2004-06-15 08:14:42 EDT (#)
Ranking: 0
nice attempt at obsfucation there pickle.
we all know who the real CONartist is.
Submitted by MrPrickle (user info) at 2004-06-15 08:03:32 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
well well well indeed
tell me conrad, how's liverpool?
Submitted by apollo88 (user info) at 2004-06-15 07:56:25 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
well, well, well.
CONrad your eloquence is what gave it away. Or should I say your attempt a pompous sanctimony (in an amusing way, fear not)
Tell me, how long have you lived in ACT?
Digi cameras are most unflatering hey Pickle?
Submitted by conrad (user info) at 2004-06-15 07:44:41 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
Does this mean that we are to be treated to an image of the Prickle visage?
What of Eskimoes?
I await the answers to these questions with great anticipation...
Submitted by MrPrickle (user info) at 2004-06-15 07:21:44 EDT (#)
Ranking: 0
if only my mind was clear enough to analyse matters properly
hopefully apollo is fully alert
Submitted by MrPrickle (user info) at 2004-06-15 07:20:33 EDT (#)
Ranking: 0
conrads reply is ...fishy.
Submitted by MrPrickle (user info) at 2004-06-15 07:18:40 EDT (#)
Ranking: 0
a question mark over comrade conrad?
or has brother apollo lost his marbles?
i'm in no state to speculate on such matters - just bought a digital camera today and have discovered i'm hideously ugly! most upsetting.
the fucking thing is so powerful every imperfection of skin and red vein in the eyes is captured and magnified to brobdinagian proportions.
Submitted by conrad (user info) at 2004-06-15 07:13:26 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
Hmmm, I know that they're the most widely-distributed people in the world still living a partly aboriginal way of life. I know that they're short and cold too, and that they've managed to forge an entire cuisine out of unadorned blubber. Furthermore, I know that their mating season is from September 3rd to November 14th, at which point the female exhibits a slightly reddened carapace and the male gives off a pungent aroma of Earl Grey tea. As in the case of the echidna and the platypus, the eggs are stored in a pouch 'til hatching.
Submitted by apollo88 (user info) at 2004-06-15 06:54:03 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
Tell me 'CONrad' what do you know of Eskimoes?
Submitted by conrad (user info) at 2004-06-15 06:49:32 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
Is that so, "Apullo"? Well, if you find anything out, do let me know as I'm entirely in the dark here. Cheers.
Submitted by apollo88 (user info) at 2004-06-15 04:35:06 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
oh and by the way, I am on to you Conrad.
Submitted by apollo88 (user info) at 2004-06-15 04:32:58 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
good point.
debate is dead. jingoism is the order of the day.
people don't change their minds, the media change it for them.
unfortunately pickle you and i have been blessed/cursed with an open inquisitive mind.
this is good because it breeds intelligence but bad because it makes us dither and procrastinate.
it can appear a weakness but is actually a great strength.
Submitted by MrPrickle (user info) at 2004-06-14 21:36:08 EDT (#)
Ranking: 0
interesting
i actually consider this issue to be one of the most serious facing modern society.
Submitted by potatomanjack (user info) at 2004-06-14 21:31:12 EDT (#)
Ranking: -2
This post is poop.
Submitted by I_Have_a_Kristen_Fetish (user info) at 2004-06-14 21:23:19 EDT (#)
Ranking: -2
Only 130 spots from the first Google search result for "R. Kelly" - http://www.ubersite.com/m/31936
Submitted by MrPrickle (user info) at 2004-06-14 21:09:03 EDT (#)
Ranking: 0
i fear so conrad
perhaps i should extend the search range to include any comments made in public, political or academic life?
equally fruitless, no doubt. unless maybe i allowed examples from some time prior to the 20th century.
on the bright side, i guess i will get to keep the scatburger all to myself!
Submitted by conrad (user info) at 2004-06-14 20:55:39 EDT (#)
Ranking: 1
A mission destined to be fruitless.
Submitted by shadowdragon (user info) at 2004-06-14 20:42:04 EDT (#)
Ranking: -2
I have recently entered a debate with myself over whether this is the stupidest thing I've ever seen. Before reading this, I was positive that whatever it is there must be something more idiotic. But now, after an intriguing 23 second arguement, I have come to fully accept that this IS the stupidest thing I've ever seen. And so, Mr Prickle, you can take that one big juicy scatburger, with all the options, and forcibly insert it into your anus.
Submitted by MrPrickle (user info) at 2004-06-14 20:34:07 EDT (#)
Ranking: 0
this is a comment typical of a shandy supporter, cindy's younger sister
you resort to emotional attack because you know you have no chance of winning the scatburger, MY scatburger, that you so desperately crave.
Submitted by kitchens_closed (user info) at 2004-06-14 20:32:37 EDT (#)
Ranking: -2
Gumby's turning over in his grave.
Submitted by Cindys_Younger_Sister (user info) at 2004-06-14 20:22:25 EDT (#)
Ranking: -2
Piss off Prickle, we are tired of your tired attempts at attention seeking.
FREE SHANDYTHEGOD!!