I found it! (443 hits)
Category: Movies & TVRating: 0.33 on 3 reviews (Rate this item) (V)
Submitted by antiLemming (View user info) at 2004-06-15 14:40:43 EDT
Too many times in the past have I gone into a cinema expecting some intangible quality to be contained in what I have decided to see, only to be disappointed by shitty special effects and fat wizards with Down's syndrome. Tonight, however was an exception; tonight I discovered what that intangible quality was.
It is, of course.... PEOPLE GETTING SHOT IN THE FACE.
Every movie needs more of this. Think of Titanic, where just as Leonardo DiCaprio is standing on the bow of the ship with his arms spread wide, *BAM!* No more face!
Random shotgun blasts to the head would do wonders for movies involving children in particular. Cheaper By The Dozen? Less face, more action please.
Dawn of the Dead epitomises what movies should be about: nothing in particular. Sure, you could argue that the story line is somehow relevant but we all know what pure shit that is. This movie exists for three reasons:
Firstly, and most importantly, to showcase the various ways in which high-velocity projectile weaponry can aid in the non-surgical removal of faces.
Secondly, to show some hot chicks in skimpy clothing (always a plus).
Thirdly, and to a lesser extent, to show that in the truly great movies nobody wins. There is no hero. There is no moral. Just lots and lots of face removal and the inherent dying.
I truly believe that movies should aim to have less plot development unless the movie has artistic merit. Crappy mainstream movies would be a lot easier to swallow if the directors and writers would accept that 90% of people don't buy into their movies and we simply want to see gratuity in various forms. Nudity, violence, comedy, whatever the case may be, we need to stop bullshitting ourselves into thinking there has to be a point to everything. Dawn Of The Dead proves just how well this principal can work.
(Yes, I've read *his* article too, the movie was only released in Australia last week though).
User Reviews
Submitted by transcendent (user info) at 2004-06-15 15:04:02 EDT (#)
Ranking: 0
Meh.. at least you owned up to the fact that this is basically the bare bones Maddox post.
Worth reading (+/-0)
Submitted by DJMattB241 (user info) at 2004-06-15 14:57:46 EDT (#)
Ranking: 1
only +1 because look what 30 seconds of editing could have done:
http://www.djmattb241.com/uber/dawn.jpg
good post though
Submitted by Ceaser (user info) at 2004-06-15 14:53:48 EDT (#)
Ranking: 0
I think what you mean is you like SNUFF movies.