Who I Like (AKA: SoxSexSax Is More Racist Than Hitler) (1257 hits)
Category: NoneRating: 1.26 on 36 reviews (Rate this item) (V)
Submitted by SoxSexSax (View user info) at 2004-06-15 23:35:14 EDT
I hate Jews because they've all got so much fucking money yet they're as tight as a camel's ass in a sand storm.
I hate niggers with a passion because they've got big, stupid rubbery lips and almost always look like chimpanzees.
I utterly despise Muslims 'cause they're always fucking going on about killing white folk in the name of some bloke called Alan.
I loathe the French because they normally stink of cheese, garlic and onions. Not to mention the fact that I like my women without an owl's nest under each arm.
I can't stand Christians with their preaching and do-gooding. If only the colliseum in Rome had been more mainstream...
I hate the Germans because you can never tell if there's a filthy, nazi war criminal hidden deep under their seemingly jovial exterior.
I don't like Hindus because they affix stupid red spots to their foreheads, whilst most sane people spend hours attempting to cover blemishes such as these.
I detest the Scottish, as the only thing they contribute to the world is the comforting knowledge that no matter how bad your own country's rate of heart disease is, it isn't the worst in the world.
I don't like Buddhists, as anyone who can sit cross legged for hours and hours on end without getting chaffed ankles shouldn't be trusted.
I hate the Irish with their stupid lilting songs and national IQ that would make a particularly stupid lemming blush.
I can't abide Sikhs with their pointless towels wrapped around their head. I'm sure there are better ways to cover those unsightly bald patches than this.
I don't like American's as I don't befriend anything that might one day try to eat me.
I can't stand atheists with their logical, wordy arguments and pompous assertions that all other religions are merely pompous assertions.
I loathe the Spanish with a passion, due to their constant need for afternoon naps and general inability to finish any building project within six months of schedule.
I despise agnostics, with their indecisive, wishy-washy views. There's a word for someone who sits on the fence on issues such as religion: pussy!
I hate the Welsh. Any nation who'd rather have sex with barnyard animals than it's own species (source: BBC poll in 1999, 59% of welsh men admitted to having sex with a sheep, and 98% of this group claimed to have preferred it to women) needs an atom-bomb to the metaphorical face.
I resent Hare Krishna's, because bald men in orange robes always remind me of the low-budget-and-wordy-titled horror film "Crazy Bald Monks In Orange Robes With Razor Sharp Knives Go On Killing Massacre In London Because The Evil Demon Of Sanarkos Told Them That Eternal Life Would Be There's If They Did." I was left scarred after watching it.
I detest my fellow Englishmen, due to their spineless habit of failing to vote for the Liberal Democrats at the election desptie the fact that national polls show that he is the most trusted of the three main party leaders.
In fact, to cut an extremely long list short, the only person I really like is...
Me.
User Reviews
Submitted by NetProphet (user info) at 2004-07-08 11:54:38 EDT (#)
Ranking: -2
Umm...
This isn't humor, it's nonsensical hate propaganda.
Oh, and this was just entirely made up:
(source: BBC poll in 1999, 59% of welsh men admitted to having sex with a sheep, and 98% of this group claimed to have preferred it to women)
Submitted by dohnuts (user info) at 2004-06-18 10:13:20 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
I don't like Buddhists, as anyone who can sit cross legged for hours and hours on end without getting chaffed ankles shouldn't be trusted.
I don't like American's as I don't befriend anything that might one day try to eat me.
-------------------------------------------------
AhHaHaHaHaHaHaHaHaHaHaHaHaHaHa!
Submitted by Stin (user info) at 2004-06-16 09:29:06 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
Bloody woolly Liberals!
"One week of every year is designated National Brotherhood Week. This is just one of many such weeks honoring various worthy causes ... I'm sure we all agree that we ought to love one another and I know there are people in the world that do not love their fellow human beings and I *hate* people like that. Here's a song about National Brotherhood Week.
Oh, the white folks hate the black folks,
And the black folks hate the white folks.
To hate all but the right folks
Is an old established rule.
But during National Brotherhood Week, National Brotherhood Week,
Lena Horne and Sheriff Clarke are dancing cheek to cheek.
It's fun to eulogize
The people you despise,
As long as you don't let 'em in your school.
Oh, the poor folks hate the rich folks,
And the rich folks hate the poor folks.
All of my folks hate all of your folks,
It's American as apple pie.
But during National Brotherhood Week, National Brotherhood Week,
New Yorkers love the Puerto Ricans 'cause it's very chic.
Step up and shake the hand
Of someone you can't stand.
You can tolerate him if you try.
Oh, the Protestants hate the Catholics,
And the Catholics hate the Protestants,
And the Hindus hate the Muslems,
And everybody hates the Jews.
But during National Brotherhood Week, National Brotherhood Week,
It's National Everyone-smile-at-one-another-hood Week.
Be nice to people who
Are inferior to you.
It's only for a week, so have no fear.
Be grateful that it doesn't last all year!"
(From Tom Lehrer - That Was The Year That Was)
Submitted by Caulaincourt (user info) at 2004-06-16 08:56:02 EDT (#)
Ranking: 0
No Comment
Submitted by Envenom (user info) at 2004-06-16 08:09:48 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
This is your best work yet +2!
"I don't like Hindus because they affix stupid red spots to their foreheads, whilst most sane people spend hours attempting to cover blemishes such as these.
I don't like American's as I don't befriend anything that might one day try to eat me."
Brilliant!
Submitted by fluff (user info) at 2004-06-16 07:55:07 EDT (#)
Ranking: 1
No Comment
Submitted by apollo88 (user info) at 2004-06-16 06:35:56 EDT (#)
Ranking: 1
I liked the 'some guy called alan' bit.
Submitted by TheMidnight12AM (user info) at 2004-06-16 06:26:48 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
I like the atheist comment.
Submitted by Avals (user info) at 2004-06-16 06:12:51 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
Wait, I'm rich!? Who's the fucker that forgot to tell me goddammit?
grlpisces, wrong site. This isn't LttD. ;)
Submitted by bargled (user info) at 2004-06-16 02:31:49 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
"You know what I really want in a girl? ME."
Submitted by squattail (user info) at 2004-06-16 02:13:07 EDT (#)
Ranking: 0
Submitted by polyamorousaj (user info) at 2004-06-16 00:24:46 (#)
Ranking: 2
Squattie, anytime you want to go head to head you just let me know.
How
Submitted by grlpisces (user info) at 2004-06-16 02:02:24 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
yes finally someone gets it! it is all about me! hail satan!!
Submitted by hairsphincter2 (user info) at 2004-06-16 01:18:05 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
Is shadowdragon a Jew?
Jimminy Jillakers.
Submitted by shadowdragon (user info) at 2004-06-16 00:38:49 EDT (#)
Ranking: 0
Racial slurs are getting boring.
But I'm happy that you hate me first. Thanks.
Submitted by polyamorousaj (user info) at 2004-06-16 00:24:46 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
Squattie, anytime you want to go head to head you just let me know.
Submitted by bugga (user info) at 2004-06-16 00:16:33 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
fucken fucken
Submitted by squattail (user info) at 2004-06-16 00:13:47 EDT (#)
Ranking: 0
Coming from poly that doesn't mean much. Everything I write is great. My favorite at the moment is my "alcoholics non-anonymous post", pure classic.
Submitted by hairsphincter2 (user info) at 2004-06-16 00:05:19 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
Submitted by im a black man at 2004-06-16 00:03:39 (#)
Ranking: -2
i hate motha fuckers like u. U r a bitch a hoe i hope someone finds u and beat the shit out of u...
Hateworthy.
Submitted by im a black man at 2004-06-16 00:03:39 EDT (#)
Ranking: -2
i hate motha fuckers like u. U r a bitch a hoe i hope someone finds u and beat the shit out of u
Submitted by dakingisdead (user info) at 2004-06-16 00:00:15 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
I resent Hare Krishna's, because bald men in orange robes always remind me of the low-budget-and-wordy-titled horror film "Crazy Bald Monks In Orange Robes With Razor Sharp Knives Go On Killing Massacre In London Because The Evil Demon Of Sanarkos Told Them That Eternal Life Would Be There's If They Did." I was left scarred after watching it.
.................................................................................................
This just about did me in.
I could get fired for laughing that hard!
Submitted by polyamorousaj (user info) at 2004-06-15 23:59:28 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
Squattail, have you ever written anything that was funny? Who are you to critique me, asshole?
Submitted by dakingisdead (user info) at 2004-06-15 23:59:09 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
I hate the Welsh. Any nation who'd rather have sex with barnyard animals than it's own species (source: BBC poll in 1999, 59% of welsh men admitted to having sex with a sheep, and 98% of this group claimed to have preferred it to women) needs an atom-bomb to the metaphorical face.
Submitted by dakingisdead (user info) at 2004-06-15 23:58:47 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
I despise agnostics, with their indecisive, wishy-washy views. There's a word for someone who sits on the fence on issues such as religion: pussy!
Submitted by squattail (user info) at 2004-06-15 23:57:46 EDT (#)
Ranking: 0
"Submitted by polyamorousaj (user info) at 2004-06-15 23:41:19 (#)
Ranking: 2
HAHAHAHA"
Nice to know what poly actually finds humorous. What are you, 10 years old poly?
Submitted by youarsoghey (user info) at 2004-06-15 23:55:33 EDT (#)
Ranking: 1
No Comment
Submitted by hairsphincter2 (user info) at 2004-06-15 23:55:06 EDT (#)
Ranking: 0
Don't you wub me anymore, Soxxy?
Submitted by spedmonkey (user info) at 2004-06-15 23:54:09 EDT (#)
Ranking: -1
Meh.
Submitted by squattail (user info) at 2004-06-15 23:53:30 EDT (#)
Ranking: 0
LAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAME
Submitted by j00 (user info) at 2004-06-15 23:47:24 EDT (#)
Ranking: 0
ok...
Submitted by Donitsu2002 (user info) at 2004-06-15 23:46:26 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
I don't like American's as I don't befriend anything that might one day try to eat me.
-----------------------------------------------------------------
We wont eat you......
right away
Submitted by SoxSexSax (user info) at 2004-06-15 23:43:45 EDT (#)
Ranking: 0
"Submitted by Fabish (user info) at 2004-06-15 23:40:18 (#)
Ranking: 1
I like you too, even if this post was one massive slander. I'll just assume it was supposed to be in the humor category, eh?"
I used to categorise my posts, but now I just post 'em under no topic. Was it humour? I'll let you decide...
Submitted by kitchens_closed (user info) at 2004-06-15 23:43:36 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
I like me too.
Submitted by conrad (user info) at 2004-06-15 23:43:02 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
Indeed
Submitted by polyamorousaj (user info) at 2004-06-15 23:41:19 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
HAHAHAHA
Submitted by Fabish (user info) at 2004-06-15 23:40:18 EDT (#)
Ranking: 1
I like you too, even if this post was one massive slander. I'll just assume it was supposed to be in the humor category, eh?
Submitted by KoolMang (user info) at 2004-06-15 23:37:12 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
No Comment