Scottish Mike, what's the score? (1028 hits)
Category: SportsRating: 0.29 on 55 reviews (Rate this item) (V)
Submitted by http://www.zen33652.zen.co.uk/ (View user info) at 2004-06-17 14:56:05 EDT
England 3 Switzerland 0
While the Scottish are too busy putting French bread up their arse, we're busy showing the rest of Europe how to play football. We had our heads screwed on this time. We didn't get bored of winning by one goal, we kept at it and stuck another two goals through the posts to show our worth. What's better is that all goalscorers were Scouse. That means from Liverpool. Come 'ead la!
We try time after time to show Wales, Scotland and Ireland how to play football, but out efforts are wasted as they're all fucking retarded. I don't think there is anyone in England who couldn't beat the entire Scotland team on their own. They're the arse end of football.
If you're reading this and you're American and think "well we're not to good at soccer either, who cares?", play Scotland. You'll suddenly realise that you've evolved three thousand years. Failing that, just watch them try and civilise themselves, basing their lives on a cunty Australian called Gibson. It's funny. I'm pissed a fucking fart, I've been drinking all day. Who wants a fight? You fucking looking at? Cunt.
KEEP ST. GEORGE IN MY HEART,
KEEP ME ENGLISH.
KEEP ST. GEORGE IN MY HEART,
I PRAY.
KEEP ST. GEORGE IN MY HEART,
KEEP ME ENGLISH.
NO SURRENDER TO THE I.R.A.
User Reviews
Submitted by G-prime (user info) at 2004-10-07 16:56:29 EDT (#)
Ranking: 0
Alba Gu Bra!
Submitted by zakalwe (user info) at 2004-09-27 09:18:56 EDT (#)
Ranking: -2
No Comment
Submitted by Random Joe at 2004-09-18 22:02:06 EDT (#)
Ranking: -2
This is about as much fun as watching a troupe of chimpanzees vomiting over each other.
Submitted by mikethescottish (user info) at 2004-06-21 05:34:38 EDT (#)
Ranking: 0
http://www.cludgie.co.uk/england/
Suck it up, bitch.
Submitted by Slapshot99 (user info) at 2004-06-18 20:31:57 EDT (#)
Ranking: -1
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Submitted by youarsoghey (user info) at 2004-06-17 17:37:10 (#)
Ranking: 0
"So what?" you ask. Well have you considered that people are practically wearing razor blades on their feet? I once got my wrist stepped on which sliced it open. That left a bone-deep cut that sliced an artery, tons of tendons, a few major muscles, and a bunch of other stuff. I lost nearly two pints of blood in the process."
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The way I see it....Hockeyboy..........Your skills as a player can best be described by the sentence "I once got my wrist STEPPED on which sliced it open."...I've played so long I know HOW guys like you end up on the ice to get....<laughing> stepped on...Hows the view at Ice Level?
Submitted by tuesdaydelay (user info) at 2004-06-18 12:52:06 EDT (#)
Ranking: 0
I don't rate Beckham highly as it is. His poor penalties don't stop us being one of the best teams in the world though.
Submitted by hi-fi-killer (user info) at 2004-06-18 09:54:55 EDT (#)
Ranking: -2
fuck your swedish manager, and while ur at it congratulate beckham on a marvelous penalty kick
Submitted by apollo88 (user info) at 2004-06-18 09:47:38 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
Football's coming home, it's coming home, it's coming!
Football's coming home, it's coming home, it's coming!
Football's coming home, it's coming home, it's coming!
Football's coming home, it's coming home, it's coming!
Football's coming home, it's coming home, it's coming!
Football's coming home, it's coming home, it's coming!
Football's coming home, it's coming home, it's coming!
Football's coming home, it's coming home, it's coming!
Football's coming home, it's coming home, it's coming!
Football's coming home, it's coming home, it's coming!
Football's coming home, it's coming home, it's coming!
Football's coming home, it's coming home, it's coming!
Football's coming home, it's coming home, it's coming!
Football's coming home, it's coming home, it's coming!
Football's coming home, it's coming home, it's coming!
Football's coming home, it's coming home, it's coming!
Football's coming home, it's coming home, it's coming!
Football's coming home, it's coming home, it's coming!
Football's coming home, it's coming home, it's coming!
Football's coming home, it's coming home, it's coming!
Football's coming home, it's coming home, it's coming!
Football's coming home, it's coming home, it's coming!
Football's coming home, it's coming home, it's coming!
Submitted by drink_DDT (user info) at 2004-06-18 09:44:16 EDT (#)
Ranking: 1
HAR HAR
Submitted by SoxSexSax (user info) at 2004-06-18 09:39:18 EDT (#)
Ranking: 0
Scotland are so bad they come with a public health warning.
Submitted by Snuggles_The_Assassin (user info) at 2004-06-18 09:38:02 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
Slapshit you can suck me off you cock muncher. Wow Chicago been a while sucking huh. Don't give me that we won back in the day shit either. You will never win with that piece of shit owner you have now. I'd love to see you play soccer, I'd probably pwn you at soccer or hockey slipshit. Lick my hairy asshole.
Submitted by tuesdaydelay (user info) at 2004-06-18 07:33:55 EDT (#)
Ranking: 0
I wasn't born in 1966. Shame you've only beaten us about twice since then. You are the THIRD team in the UK now. Wales would shit all over you and your German manager.
Submitted by hi-fi-killer (user info) at 2004-06-18 06:19:32 EDT (#)
Ranking: -2
haha thats so fucking funny.... since ur such an avid english supporter, ull remember when england won the world cup in 1966, that same year when u got back u played us, and when i say us i mean the scottish, and we kicked ur fucking ass in wembley u fuck! so much 4 fucking pride!
!
Submitted by tuesdaydelay (user info) at 2004-06-18 05:29:26 EDT (#)
Ranking: 0
1. Oddly enough, many of the best football teams tend to have Niggers playing for them.
2. The IRA have nothing to with anything here, that's just a song we sing to the tune of "Sing Hosannah" or whatever that hymn was called.
3. Erm. Three nil. Stick that up your kilts or simply shut the fuck up.
Submitted by The_Nipper (user info) at 2004-06-18 04:25:14 EDT (#)
Ranking: -2
Fucking a, if i had a goldfish right now i would choke it to death because of your shit ass post. Please for the sake of humanity, fuck an arc welder.
Submitted by Scotsman (user info) at 2004-06-18 03:40:49 EDT (#)
Ranking: -2
Oh yeah -2 ya fanny!
Submitted by Scotsman (user info) at 2004-06-18 03:40:27 EDT (#)
Ranking: 0
What the fuck does the IRA have to do with it. You prick!!!!
Submitted by big_n_veiny (user info) at 2004-06-18 03:35:01 EDT (#)
Ranking: -2
Submitted by Random Joe at 2004-06-18 00:49:33 (#)
Ranking: -2
-2. You're never going to win because you ahve two niggers on your team.
Yeah stupid pommy git
Submitted by tuesdaydelay (user info) at 2004-06-18 03:27:19 EDT (#)
Ranking: 0
If it wasn't for the Scottish rejoicing and posting shit about France winning in the first place, this post wouldn't have come about. You can dish it out, but you just can't hack it.
Submitted by mikethescottish (user info) at 2004-06-18 01:49:10 EDT (#)
Ranking: 0
Euripides, that article explains to a word my feelings on the England national team and their supporters. The Scottish team may not be much more interesting, but there is more genuine passion lurking behind the gaudy patriotic symbolism.
Submitted by Random Joe at 2004-06-18 00:49:33 EDT (#)
Ranking: -2
-2. You're never going to win because you ahve two niggers on your team.
Submitted by euripidestrousers (user info) at 2004-06-18 00:37:24 EDT (#)
Ranking: 0
http://www.guardian.co.uk/comment/story/0,3604,1237121,00.html
Submitted by conrad (user info) at 2004-06-18 00:29:41 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
No Comment
Submitted by SoxSexSax (user info) at 2004-06-17 20:44:30 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
Football's coming home, it's coming home, it's coming!
Football's coming home, it's coming home, it's coming!
Football's coming home, it's coming home, it's coming!
Football's coming home, it's coming home, it's coming!
Football's coming home, it's coming home, it's coming!
Football's coming home, it's coming home, it's coming!
Football's coming home, it's coming home, it's coming!
Football's coming home, it's coming home, it's coming!
Football's coming home, it's coming home, it's coming!
Football's coming home, it's coming home, it's coming!
Football's coming home, it's coming home, it's coming!
Football's coming home, it's coming home, it's coming!
Football's coming home, it's coming home, it's coming!
Football's coming home, it's coming home, it's coming!
Football's coming home, it's coming home, it's coming!
Football's coming home, it's coming home, it's coming!
Football's coming home, it's coming home, it's coming!
Football's coming home, it's coming home, it's coming!
Football's coming home, it's coming home, it's coming!
Football's coming home, it's coming home, it's coming!
Football's coming home, it's coming home, it's coming!
Football's coming home, it's coming home, it's coming!
Football's coming home, it's coming home, it's coming!
Submitted by Slapshot99 (user info) at 2004-06-17 19:31:45 EDT (#)
Ranking: -1
Snuggles....did you fart?..........because I thought I smelled vasoline?.......ANYWAYS......Listen up Bleach breath.........(winking like Otter in Animal House).........I grew up in CHICAGO......yeah....Ever hear of it....I think I can remember seeing some ice there from time to time...Frozen lakes here and there....I had skates on before you could even tie your shoes......(assuming you can).........I think they have velcro shoes now, The special Ed kids use them alot...so good on you........anyways.........go play soccer kiddo..............and don't worry when you see mom drive off in the middle of the game....she watched you play for a few minutes...yawning...she's with me.........and I'm teaching her all about "icing"
Submitted by Slapshot99 (user info) at 2004-06-17 19:22:39 EDT (#)
Ranking: -2
"...I picked Arsenal because they have a cool name"...Big fan huh?.......tell me THAT doesn't scream Poke'mon trading cards?...........I bet you collect "cool" pogs too huh?...........With regards to real sports.........(i.e.:anything but soccer)....keep your Backstreet Boys comments to what you do know ok?.........."oHHHHHHHHHHHHHHH SHIT..........HAND FOUL"
Submitted by R. Duke at 2004-06-17 19:10:12 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
Damn right! let's do it England!
Also, FYI, two of the goals were scored by an 18 year old. Making him Euro's youngest goal scorer!
Submitted by dakingisdead (user info) at 2004-06-17 19:08:20 EDT (#)
Ranking: 0
I'm with slapshot except the real lamest game ever is Cricket.
Funny how they are both from England and both about as exciting as watching grass grow.
Submitted by Snuggles_The_Assassin (user info) at 2004-06-17 18:47:09 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
Soccer pwnz.
Hockey pwnz.
Tuseday way to come around, and realize Hockey is good shit.
Slapshot you sir are a fucking dumbass, Florida is not a "hockey" town. So shut the fuck up you twatcock.
Submitted by Slapshot99 (user info) at 2004-06-17 18:10:48 EDT (#)
Ranking: -1
Submitted by youarsoghey (user info) at 2004-06-17 15:11:24 (#)
Ranking: 2
Submitted by Slapshot99 (user info) at 2004-06-17 15:06:15 (#)
Ranking: -2
It's still fucking the lamest game ever to mar the landscape of human competition. One only has to be void of the ability to catch, throw or shoot a ball to have the desired skills for soccer. The only thing remotely exciting about soccer is the possibility of a HUGE riot ensuing after a match.
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You, sir, are a moron. Not only did you word what you wanted to say pathetically, but you also are completely wrong. I'd like to see you try to play soccer and then say it's easy. Also a hockey fan, if he has the right approach, should find soccer very exciting. You can't look at a sport and say, "WOW THIS IS BORING SO I'LL NEVER GIVE IT A FAIR SHAKE." Asshole
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Kiss and fondle my pink parts kiddo.....I have played soccer....... a couple years of it in Iceland....(actually won a tourney there)....And my vote is still not swayed....it sucked Taco Bell mudd then and it still sucks the high-hard one to this day, assjack. Even "true" soccer fans don't like the sport much. Which is why they spend most of the time "watching" a match getting so fucking blitzed and agitated that a game almost always ends up in a HUGE beer smelling riot. Soccer is just above a game of Tag with a group of Downs kids (english soccer kids).
Submitted by youarsoghey (user info) at 2004-06-17 18:08:48 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
The NHL is awesome to watch, but to completely understand how great hockey is, you've got to get to the local level, just like in soccer. Another thing I noticed was that once I got into a team (I think you read my post about it...I picked Arsenal because they have a cool name), it got a lot more personal for me. I can watch every second of New Jersey Devils games not only because I think about the technicalities of hockey constantly and can fully appreciate how good those players are, but because it's my local team and I get pissed when we lost to the stupid New York Rangers.
I wish we had the European love for their sport here but for hockey instead. Canada's got a serious intensity when it comes to hockey, and that would just not be possible in America thanks to shit sports like basketball and NASCAR (sport?) and outrageously popular sports like American football.
The non-hick Americans are STILL contemplating exactly why the morons of this country love NASCAR so much. It is symbolic of everything that's wrong with this country (racing around in a pointless circle while wasting natural resources while people only really watch for the crashes) and is not interesting at all.
Submitted by William_Q_Percy (user info) at 2004-06-17 17:56:31 EDT (#)
Ranking: 0
I do like the passion of euro football fans, though. I wish there was dedication and rivalry like that in North America.. in ANY sport.
t would be the shit to have a team fight song and riots after games. Europeans are crazy.
Submitted by William_Q_Percy (user info) at 2004-06-17 17:48:09 EDT (#)
Ranking: 0
To me, soccer is like baseball. Its shit to watch, fun to play, and I don't understand why it is so bloody popular.
Submitted by tuesdaydelay (user info) at 2004-06-17 17:46:57 EDT (#)
Ranking: 0
Yeah, ok, I am not anti-hockey really. I just hate some of the things hockey fans say about football/soccer. I have watched a few hockey games on Channel 4/5 and I think it's quite a good sport. It's just too bad many of the fans only watch it for the fights and support whoever is winning.
Our sports in this country are very passionate. Particularly football. We support a team because they're close to us. We take it very seriously indeed, as it isn't just about 22 men running after a ball. It's about towns and cities pitting against each other and proving something. I admit, this passion is diluting as the sport gets bigger and bigger worldwide and commercially, but it will never vanish completely.
Submitted by youarsoghey (user info) at 2004-06-17 17:37:10 EDT (#)
Ranking: 0
Submitted by tuesdaydelay (user info) at 2004-06-17 15:20:10 (#)
Ranking: 0
Withoubt fail, you get people whining on about "soccer" when it's nothing to do with them. This title itself is a very NON-hitwhored title. If you don't like the beautiful game you are naturally worse off than everyone else.
First of all you have a weight problem.
Secondly you favour a female sport which involves skating and fighting with fucking helmets and pads on. What the hell is that shit? Want to watch fights? Watch boxing, you stupid penis head. Fighting with pads an helmets is untalented and non-painful. Therefore pointless.
Thirdly, you hate this post as it has nothing to do with your dull life which involves porno and growing your hair. It's under sports for a reason, not my fault everything plus you shitty girlfriend problems all feature on the main page.
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Tuesday, you know I defended you, and I play and know hockey way better than that "Slapshot" guy. He's from Florida, which means the rest of the country is ashamed of him. But please don't shoot off about stuff you know nothing about. Hockey has nothing to do with fighting which only really exists on the professional level. Hockey players are some of the most sportsmanlike athletes in the world. Unlike soccer players, hockey players will almost never fake an injury because we find it to be childish and unsportsmanlike. However, I still like to look past that bit in soccer because I find it a very entertaining sport on the right levels.
On the topic of injuries, you have to understand how dangerous hockey is. Yes, we wear pads, but there are many more serious problems in the sport that don't exist in sports like rugby and soccer. Boards have caused me more injuries than I can count. I've broken bones, sprained ankles, gotten many concussions, separated my shoulder, nearly broken my neck by going headfirst in but instead got severe whiplash, etc. Sticks can slice open the many open bits of skin that you can't see behind the jersey and socks, and they have caused hundreds of contusions for me alone. Also people are skating. "So what?" you ask. Well have you considered that people are practically wearing razor blades on their feet? I once got my wrist stepped on which sliced it open. That left a bone-deep cut that sliced an artery, tons of tendons, a few major muscles, and a bunch of other stuff. I lost nearly two pints of blood in the process.
Also, before you make fun of Americans for being overweight, look at yourselves.
http://news.bbc.co.uk/1/hi/health/1170787.stm
Submitted by Falconer (user info) at 2004-06-17 17:21:21 EDT (#)
Ranking: 1
I found that in the england - switzerland game we were pretty lacklustre. The scoreline does not affect nearly how poorly we played (rather, it is just indicative of how shite switzerland are).
France on the other hand, beat us with two scabby cheap-shot last minute goals, and they will be annihilated by us if there is a rematch in this tournament.
Submitted by mikethescottish (user info) at 2004-06-17 17:20:16 EDT (#)
Ranking: 0
If anyone wants to know how this started...
http://www.ubersite.com/m/35752
Submitted by mikethescottish (user info) at 2004-06-17 17:18:50 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
You got lucky. Switzerland were the better team for the most part, and England actually played better against France. I guess i'll have to devote my supportive energies to Croatia now (who looked pretty good against France).
+2 for being the first post with my name in it, and cheering me up inbetween exams (which i'm sure was unintentional)
Submitted by tuesdaydelay (user info) at 2004-06-17 16:39:46 EDT (#)
Ranking: 0
Don't worry, no matter how less you care about football, you will always be better than Scotland. They take pride in it. Canada? New Zealand? You will never be as bad as Scotland.
Submitted by potatomanjack (user info) at 2004-06-17 16:35:54 EDT (#)
Ranking: 1
Go England!
I guess... I haven't been watching the Euro Cup or whatever because, well, I'm Canadian and our team would probably lose to any European coutry's retarded national team.
I don't understand why I don't enjoy football more. I mean, it's gotta have something considering it's the most watched sport in the world.
Submitted by ToxicNarcotic (user info) at 2004-06-17 16:22:20 EDT (#)
Ranking: 0
fuck that Scotland forever mother fuckers
Submitted by tuesdaydelay (user info) at 2004-06-17 16:15:03 EDT (#)
Ranking: 0
I actually have minimal problems with Ice Hockey. It is the closest sport to football. It's Ice Hockey fans I dislike. They all seem to whine about how football doesn't involve fights when neither sport is about fighting anyway. Football is football, hockey is hockey, fighting is fighting. Get your priorities right, or at least understand the fucking sport you're defending.
P.S. No hockey fan would stand a chance in a fight with an angry England fan. With or without pads, we'd break you.
Submitted by Falco (user info) at 2004-06-17 16:07:46 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
Submitted by tuesdaydelay (user info) at 2004-06-17 15:20:10 (#)
Ranking: 0
Secondly you favour a female sport which involves skating and fighting with fucking helmets and pads on. What the hell is that shit? Want to watch fights? Watch boxing, you stupid penis head. Fighting with pads an helmets is untalented and non-painful. Therefore pointless.
**********
Icehockey is kool u toss, quit fucking people off it will do nothing good for your cause.
Submitted by tuesdaydelay (user info) at 2004-06-17 15:42:42 EDT (#)
Ranking: 0
There is also no doubt that England are far better than France. They were lucky scamming two gaols in the last six thousand years of injury time. Now they're being beaten by Croatia. We'll laugh when they go out. Although, if they fluke again, we'll fuck them over later on.
Submitted by tuesdaydelay (user info) at 2004-06-17 15:31:14 EDT (#)
Ranking: 0
I am just about to take a really long warm shit. I will detail the result of this, just as soon as I return.
Submitted by euripidestrousers (user info) at 2004-06-17 15:26:00 EDT (#)
Ranking: -2
No Comment
Submitted by tuesdaydelay (user info) at 2004-06-17 15:20:10 EDT (#)
Ranking: 0
Withoubt fail, you get people whining on about "soccer" when it's nothing to do with them. This title itself is a very NON-hitwhored title. If you don't like the beautiful game you are naturally worse off than everyone else.
First of all you have a weight problem.
Secondly you favour a female sport which involves skating and fighting with fucking helmets and pads on. What the hell is that shit? Want to watch fights? Watch boxing, you stupid penis head. Fighting with pads an helmets is untalented and non-painful. Therefore pointless.
Thirdly, you hate this post as it has nothing to do with your dull life which involves porno and growing your hair. It's under sports for a reason, not my fault everything plus you shitty girlfriend problems all feature on the main page.
Submitted by orangejuice (user info) at 2004-06-17 15:14:54 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
Haha, and this is in comparison to what? American "football" where you use your foot all of...twice a game.
Run 5 yards, get battered, start again...REPEAT
bassball: bunch've grown men playing rounders. girls game. I don't like football (soccer for you illiterate types) and I'd still rather watch that then any American shit
I still love America though. Keep killing rag heads for us
cheers
Submitted by cf7 at 2004-06-17 15:12:20 EDT (#)
Ranking: -2
Soccer is a sport for retards, just look at the English fans.
Submitted by youarsoghey (user info) at 2004-06-17 15:11:24 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
Submitted by Slapshot99 (user info) at 2004-06-17 15:06:15 (#)
Ranking: -2
It's still fucking the lamest game ever to mar the landscape of human competition. One only has to be void of the ability to catch, throw or shoot a ball to have the desired skills for soccer. The only thing remotely exciting about soccer is the possibility of a HUGE riot ensuing after a match.
================================================
You, sir, are a moron. Not only did you word what you wanted to say pathetically, but you also are completely wrong. I'd like to see you try to play soccer and then say it's easy. Also a hockey fan, if he has the right approach, should find soccer very exciting. You can't look at a sport and say, "WOW THIS IS BORING SO I'LL NEVER GIVE IT A FAIR SHAKE." Asshole.
Submitted by orangejuice (user info) at 2004-06-17 15:06:44 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
WOOWOO...FUCK EVERYONE EVER EXEPT FOR US. ESPECIALLY INDIA X
Submitted by Slapshot99 (user info) at 2004-06-17 15:06:15 EDT (#)
Ranking: -2
It's still fucking the lamest game ever to mar the landscape of human competition. One only has to be void of the ability to catch, throw or shoot a ball to have the desired skills for soccer. The only thing remotely exciting about soccer is the possibility of a HUGE riot ensuing after a match.
Submitted by Ghostdude (user info) at 2004-06-17 15:03:52 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
wooooo yeaaahhhhhh
Submitted by tuesdaydelay (user info) at 2004-06-17 14:59:16 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
Now we're fucking rolling!
Submitted by youarsoghey (user info) at 2004-06-17 14:57:15 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
In America we have to PayPerView Euro2004. I wanted to shoot myself when I found that out.