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Evil Slumbers - Chapter 4: Bring Out The Clowns (763 hits)

Category: Quotes & Stories

Rating: 1 on 4 reviews (Rate this item) (V)
Labels:

Submitted by gain (View user info) at 2004-06-27 23:08:07 EDT


Chapter One - http://www.ubersite.com/m/34766

Chapter Two - http://www.ubersite.com/m/34801

Chapter Three - http://www.ubersite.com/m/35075


After killing Steve, I felt rejuvenated. I moved down to Florida to take some time off, and worked hustling cheap crap on the beach. The pay kept me alive, and that was all that I needed.

I now had two choices. Matt or Mitch. It was surprisingly tough. In the end, I went with Mitch, because I was simply to damn lazy to start a new life at the time. Mitch lived in Orlando, pretty much the cesspool of Florida. He started a company that manufactured so-called 'healthy' soft drinks, and was now a millionaire. It had always seemed obvious that he would become a millionaire, because he had always lived like one. He spent exorbitant amounts of money to buy girls 'gifts.' He had once spent 100 dollars to get a guy to beat the shit out of me.

That greasy sack of shit had only one problem, aside from me. He was afraid of clowns. To an extreme degree. During a school trip to a small fair, a clown snuck up behind him, then grabbed him and gave him a big hug. Mitch snapped on him, and started beating the hell out of this clown. He was drooling, his eyes were red and he was screaming obscenities at the top of his lungs. I laughed my ass off, but that's just me. It also gave me my best idea. I went out in the middle of the night, and broke into an expensive suit store. I killed the security guard inside, and strung him up next to the mannequins. If I do say so myself, it was pretty humorous.

Armed with a shiny suit, I burst into his secretary's office and demanded to see him. After convincing her that I worked for the Pepsi Corporation and had more money than she could imagine, I scheduled an immediate meeting with Mitch.

I strolled into his office with a carefully rehearsed swagger and sank into a fine piece of dead cow. After propping up and opening a very expensive briefcase, I began.

"Hello, sir."

"Just what the hell are you doing in my office!"

"I'm not quite sure that that's the kind of attitude that Pepsi wants for it's V.P's."

Hook. Line. Sinker.

"Now wait just a second, Mr...?"

"Garrick, James Garrick."

It was of course, a fictional name.

"Well Mr. Garrick, I think that I could accommodate you. What were you here for?"

"Well, my company, Pepsi, has expressed interest in your revolutionary methods for making soft drinks, and would like to buy them."

His eyes arched and widened. I thought of a deer in the headlights and almost giggled.

"Of course, of course! Would you like to talk about this now?"

Here came the tricky part.

"Actually, I was thinking that we discuss this over the ocean, mmm?" I said, humming. It was all confidence. "Meet me on Jackson beach, tomorrow at 3 o'clock, O.K? Good."

I left before he could formulate a response. Tomorrow was, of course, another day.


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User Reviews


Submitted by Genko (user info) at 2004-07-24 21:07:10 EDT (#)
Ranking: 1

If I wouldn't share a street name with you on this account, you can probably bet that I won't do it if you ask with your Hamilton account. Sorry dude.

Submitted by Genko (user info) at 2004-07-15 20:51:04 EDT (#)
Ranking: 1

Sorry dude, I can't tell you what street my little tree fiasco was on.

With that information, you'd be able to get my name, address, place of employment...

Not stuff that belongs on the Internet.


On a totally unrelated matter, you have a good writing style: short, minimalist sentences. Your characters could be done a little better, especially the main one. Get inside his head; give the reader an idea as to why he's doing the thing's he's doing.

Good post. I'd read the series now, but I don't have time. I'll probably get to it eventually though.

Submitted by gain (user info) at 2004-06-29 11:01:36 EDT (#)
Ranking: 0

1 review? DAMMIT!

Submitted by munado at 2004-06-27 23:25:45 EDT (#)
Ranking: 0

incomprehensible


Our lives are in the hands of men no smarter than you or I. Many of
them incompetent boobs. I know this because I've worked alongside
them, gone bowling with them, watched them pass me over for promotions
time and again and I say this stinks.

-- Homer Simpson
Homer's Odyssey