Diary of a Madman 13 (835 hits)
Category: NoneLabels: doam
Rating: 1.86 on 18 reviews (Rate this item) (V)
Submitted by Bigmike (View user info) at 2004-07-21 23:01:54 EDT
I took a walk through the park today.
Maria.....Sandy......Karen.
I saw the children playing in the sand.
Maria.....Sandy......Karen.
They were playing kick the can and tag. They were riding their bikes. They were playing tetherball and checkers.
Maria.....Sandy......Karen.
I saw them making boondoggles and drawing pictures. The park attendants helping dole out materials. The youngest being helped by the oldest. I saw them on the swings and teeter-totters. I saw them climbing trees.
Maria.....Sandy......Karen.
I saw them playing baseball, softball, handball. Some of them were crying, some were laughing, most were just playing. I sat down on the bench, my favorite one overlooking the fountain. I watched as the children dipped their toes in the cool, refreshing water.
Maria.....Sandy......Karen.
I wondered if there were memories imbedded in dna. I wondered if the most single of cells holds memories dear to life. I watched as children fell while they were playing, skinning their knees and leaving a small morsel of their skin behind, dna cast aside without so much as a thought.
Maria.....Sandy......Karen.
If they only knew. If they could concieve of what might be in the dirt that they play in. If they could only imagine what could be in the grass that stains their knees. If they could see what is mixed into all the rainwater that drips down into the ground, filtering itself through the dirt and the rocks and the bodies that I put there. The bodies of....
Maria.....Sandy......Karen.
These small children. Eating their lunches, their candies, their freeze pops. Chewing their gum, playing with their dolls. No more than six feet away from...... No more than three feet above.....Running over them all day long. Sitting on them. Lying on them. Fighting on them. Crying on them. It gives me comfort to know that the children keep them company. I wonder how their parents would react if they knew?
God, what a rush.
If they only knew.
I know.
I am the only one.
User Reviews
Submitted by Holz (user info) at 2005-02-22 16:04:32 EST (#)
Ranking: 2
No Comment
Submitted by Fabish (user info) at 2004-08-08 01:21:00 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
Tough to get into the first read, but I started to understand more and more where the main character was coming from. The repitition was bothersome at first, but now it's necessary. Represented well.
Submitted by AshK (user info) at 2004-07-29 09:14:46 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
I hate to leave no comment, but all I keep saying is how much I love this series. The last one turned me on too much to comment on at the time. I have read it a NUMBER of times since. I'm still stuck on the image of his bald head from an earlier entry. I haven't been watching the series closely enough and have another one to read after this one. mmmmmmm
Submitted by Circe (user info) at 2004-07-22 20:13:08 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
No Comment
Submitted by Walsareck (user info) at 2004-07-22 05:12:50 EDT (#)
Ranking: 1
I dislike small children; they're too damn ignorant. That's all I liked about this post.
Submitted by Kracka (user info) at 2004-07-22 04:55:51 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
um..........................yeah.
-Black Ninja
Submitted by sparkle_pink (user info) at 2004-07-22 01:50:32 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
No Comment
Submitted by Bigmike (user info) at 2004-07-22 00:14:47 EDT (#)
Ranking: 0
Submitted by LucidCognition (user info) at 2004-07-21 23:55:07 (#)
Ranking: 1
Sorry to do it, but I'm gonna break the streak. I thought it was pretty good, but not as chilling as other people are describing it, nor did I find it unpredictable. I think it would have been better if each part between the repatitions was longer and more mundanley detailed.
Don't be sorry.
Have you read any of the other 12?
Sometimes he thinks in rather short bursts and other times in long drawn out themes.
His diary is a strange thing. Sometimes it's experiences of thought and other times it's a description of actions he's taken. He never dates his diary and so it often seems random. I am not sure if he is unpredictable or even if he's trying to be. Most of the time it's just the way he see's things or has seen them.
The whole point here is, he couldn't make the verses between the repetitions longer. It's just the way he thought them. It's the way his mind saw them.
I appreciate the criticism but the diary just comes out the way it comes out. It is a book that will be discovered someday by authorities and read exactly the way he put it down on paper for better or for worse.
What I find interesting about this particular passage is that he is watching the children play over (above, near, whatever) the corpses of three young women that he buried in the park. He see's the relationship between the children and the bodies. He gets a kick out of it. He can see the bodies in the places that he covered them with dirt. He wonders about them. He wonders what would happen if the children knew they were playing within feet of corpses.
He's mad.
Submitted by dakingisdead (user info) at 2004-07-21 23:59:24 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
While I was reading this the Violent Femmes 'Country Death Song' was playing in my mind.
Well, I'm a thinkin' and thinkin', till there's nothin' I ain't thunk.
Breathing in the stink, till finally I stunk.
It was at that time, I swear I lost my mind.
I started making plans to kill my own kind.
I started making plans to kill my own kind.
Come little daughter," I said to the youngest one,
Put your coat on, we'll have some fun.
We'll go out to mountains, the one to explore.
Her face then lit up, I was standing by the door.
Her face then lit up, I was standing by the door.
Come little daughter, I will carry the lanterns.
We'll go out tonight, we'll go to the caverns.
We'll go out tonight, we'll go to the caves.
Kiss your mother goodnight and remember that God saves.
Kiss your mother goodnight and remember that God saves.
A led her to a hole, a deep black well.
I said "make a wish, make sure and not tell and
close you're eyes dear, and count to seven.
You know your papa loves you, good children go to heaven.
You know your papa loves you, good children go to heaven.
I gave her a push, I gave her a shove.
I pushed with all my might, I pushed with all my love.
I through my child into a bottomless pit.
She was screaming as she fell, but I never heard her hit.
She was screaming as she fell, but I never heard her hit.
Submitted by LucidCognition (user info) at 2004-07-21 23:55:07 EDT (#)
Ranking: 1
Sorry to do it, but I'm gonna break the streak. I thought it was pretty good, but not as chilling as other people are describing it, nor did I find it unpredictable. I think it would have been better if each part between the repatitions was longer and more mundanley detailed.
Submitted by zombieZero (user info) at 2004-07-21 23:26:07 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
Freaky. I like this. At first I thought maybe the three names were those of children the sicko was watching, that was a neat twist. Short, packs a punch.
Submitted by Yenegi at 2004-07-21 23:23:29 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
Excellent!
Submitted by QueenAshlee (user info) at 2004-07-21 23:22:18 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
No Comment
Submitted by Scott_James (user info) at 2004-07-21 23:21:59 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
No Comment
Submitted by liquor_beaver (user info) at 2004-07-21 23:14:42 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
realistic. very realistic. *shiver*
nice style - the repetition made for a satisying ending.
Submitted by ParlorTrick (user info) at 2004-07-21 23:12:47 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
lions, tigers, bears
Just slightly twisted....
lions, tigers, bears
Submitted by Random Joe at 2004-07-21 23:10:17 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
Bud......Wise.....Errrr.
Submitted by Spiral_Abraxis (user info) at 2004-07-21 23:02:39 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
Bush......Kerry........Nader