A Story And Drawing (516 hits)
Category: GraphicsRating: -0.17 on 9 reviews (Rate this item) (V)
Submitted by Tenyuki (View user info) at 2004-07-24 13:05:55 EDT
Despite what I tell myself every so often, I'm one really immature kid. The things I do, say, love, and/or hate are things kids my age shouldn't really, well, do, say, love, and/or hate. But I guess it's the little things in life that make you who you are. Or some shit like that.
A few weeks ago or something, me and some friends went to this suburban mall because it's kick ass and huge. They have this purple carpeted rest area where you can just... chill. They have this one store where this hott chick used to work at, and we'd go in there and look at her. Man... I miss her. And I miss the purple carpeted area... 'CAUSE IT'S GONE, MOTHER FUCKERS.
Anyways, the reason we were there was so my friend, Tim, could get his girlfriend a fucking build a bear. See, this is a funny story. Tim asks this girl, Brenna, out after a few weeks of messing around with her. So, you know, it's all good and shit. But it turns out Brenna's birthday was three days after he asked her out. Oh man, did he get fucked over. So, of course, he was left shelling out 25 bucks for this teddy bear.
If you remember my first post, I said that communication with a girl could actually be a good thing. In Tim's case, it would have been a life saving kind of thing... except, you know... it'd be money saving.
So we're getting on the bus back home, and there are four girls that get on with us. I, being the clever and creative one of the group, decided to code name them. They were dubbed Nice Eyes, Ugly, Stretch Marks, and Hott One. Nice Eyes, Ugly, and Hott One are self-explanatory, but Stretch Marks?! Yes... this girl was, what, 15, and she had stretch marks on her arms and on her breasts. Come on guys, that's fucking disgusting, especially for a 15 year old.
So shit happens, screen names are exchanged, and we find ourselves to this past Wednesday. We all went bowling on Wednesday, three of the girls and two new ones, and me and some guys. It was five girls and six guys. This paragraph doesn't matter. Ha ha ha, you got shafted out of 10 seconds of your time reading this paragraph. Man, don't you feel shitty?
Anyways, after stupid bowling, we end up at a Dairy Queen that was down the street. Yes, mother fucking Dairy Queen still exists. It was mind boggling. After about 10 minutes, this fat ass little kid walks in with her fat ass family. This girl was probably around 12 or so, and she HUGE. To put it simply, she had the whole Dairy Royalty rolled into her. Ha ha ha, you get it? ROLLed... fat rolls... ah ha ha.
Okay, this is where the only part of relevancy takes place between this post and my intro paragraph.
I HATE FAT KIDS. I HATE LITTLE KIDS. I HATE FAT, LITTLE KIDS.
And this girl was all of those put together to form some hideous human incarnate of Jabba the Hutt. And she was a redhead. I hate redheads with a passion. And I'm sure she had freckles, as well. Who the fuck has freckles?!
I couldn't take it anymore. I thought laughing at her would do it for me. It didn't... not in the slightest. My friends walked out of the door, and I just ran out and yelled "WHAT A FUCKING FAT ASS BITCH!" to get it off of my chest.
Apparently, the door was one of those stupid doors that take 5 minutes to close, and, well, fat people probably have good hearing, because her family was looking at me weird from inside. They were probably too fat to do anything, since we stood around outside of the Dairy Queen for about 10 more minutes, and they didn't do shit.
And that's how I lost my virginity. I'm sure I'll be ranting on about some random event that happens this Sunday.
AND MAN, HAVE YOU GUYS SEEN VIVIAN'S NEW HAIRSTYLE?! OH MAN! +2 FOR YOU!
User Reviews
Submitted by mikethescottish (user info) at 2004-07-24 19:14:14 EDT (#)
Ranking: -1
You say WHAT about redheads? I trust you haven't met our good friend MickGinny...
Submitted by Tenyuki (user info) at 2004-07-24 13:57:31 EDT (#)
Ranking: 0
You should have read WHY it was kick ass and huge.
It had a purple carpeted resting area. PURPLE CARPETED RESTING AREA. COME ON. WHO DOES THAT THESE DAYS?! Well... it's gone now... so there's no point in going there... except for, you know, suburbanite girls who think Schaumburg is considered a part of Chicago.
Submitted by engine13 (user info) at 2004-07-24 13:52:28 EDT (#)
Ranking: -1
"A few weeks ago or something, me and some friends went to this suburban mall because it's kick ass and huge."
Sorry, stopped reading right there.
Submitted by Tenyuki (user info) at 2004-07-24 13:48:00 EDT (#)
Ranking: 0
You said I was special with the "shul". WHICH IS IT, HUH?!
Submitted by ohlookasquirrel (user info) at 2004-07-24 13:42:31 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
Well aren't you special!
Submitted by I_Have_a_Kristen_Fetish (user info) at 2004-07-24 13:41:20 EDT (#)
Ranking: 0
Redheads are good to eat.
Submitted by Tenyuki (user info) at 2004-07-24 13:36:21 EDT (#)
Ranking: 0
Yeah, I tend to lose focus around halfway, so it doesn't really flow well. I'll probably do a serious one some day. One with, you know, plot, character development, comedy, romance, and hott, sweaty sex.
Anyways, yeah, I'm talking about the "stereotypical" redheads... with the orange-ish looking, freckles on face, neck, arms, EVERYWHERE kind of redheads. Dear God, do I hate those types of redheads. Like Annie.
And it's okay, Tom. Accidents happen.
Submitted by FilthyAssistant (user info) at 2004-07-24 13:25:30 EDT (#)
Ranking: -1
"I hate redheads with a passion."
Wait til you grow up. You'll come to turn that redheads are manna from heaven, for reasons that cannot be discussed in front of minors.
Not a terrible post, but all the little asides made me feel like I was watching Tiny Toons. I've seen better.
Submitted by Tom (user info) at 2004-07-24 13:13:28 EDT (#)
Ranking: 0
...I have freckles...