Messed Up Instructions (674 hits)
Category: HumorRating: -1 on 12 reviews (Rate this item) (V)
Submitted by TeenageDirtbag (View user info) at 2004-07-31 18:03:13 EDT
Screwd up instructions:
"On Sears hairdryer:
Do not use while sleeping.
(Gee, that's the only time I have to work on my hair!)
On a bag of Fritos:
You could be a winner! No purchase necessary. Details inside.
(The shoplifter special!)
On a bar of Dial soap:
Directions: Use like regular soap.
(and that would be how?)
On some Swann frozen dinners:
Serving suggestion: Defrost.
(But it's 'just' a suggestion!)
On Tesco's Tiramisu dessert: (printed on bottom of the box)
Do not turn upside down.
(Too late! you lose!)
On Marks & Spencer Bread Pudding:
Product will be hot after heating.
(Are you sure? Let's experiment.)
On packaging for a Rowenta iron:
Do not iron clothes on body.
(But wouldn't that save more time?)(Whose body?)
On Boot's Children's cough medicine:
Do not drive car or operate machinery.
(We could do a lot to reduce the construction accidents if we just kept those 5 year olds off those fork lifts.)
On Nytol sleep aid:
Warning: may cause drowsiness.
(One would hope!)
On a Korean kitchen knife:
Warning: keep out of children.
(hmm...something must have gotten lost in the translation...)
On a string of Christmas lights:
For indoor or outdoor use only.
(As opposed to use in outer space.)
On a food processor:
"Not to be used for the other use.
(Now I'm curious.)
On Sainsbury's peanuts:
Warning: contains nuts.
(but no peas?)
On an American Airlines packet of nuts:
Instructions: open packet, eat nuts.
(somebody got paid big bucks to write this one...)
On a Swedish chainsaw:
Do not attempt to stop chain with your hands.
(Raise your hand if you've tried this...)
On a child's Superman costume:
Wearing of this garment does not enable you to fly.
(Oh go ahead! That's right, destroy a universal childhood belief.)"
Funnyjunk
User Reviews
Submitted by c1ndy (user info) at 2005-07-01 17:27:03 EDT (#)
Ranking: 1
On a child's Superman costume:
Wearing of this garment does not enable you to fly.
---
hahaha
Submitted by Girlwithaclue (user info) at 2005-07-01 17:12:21 EDT (#)
Ranking: 1
Made me smile!
Submitted by mazellan (user info) at 2005-07-01 17:09:41 EDT (#)
Ranking: 1
Made me laugh but i've seen it before
Submitted by Avals (user info) at 2004-08-01 14:20:32 EDT (#)
Ranking: -2
Dear mother fucking newbie,
Write your own shit or die.
Love,
Avals.
Submitted by AlahAckbar (user info) at 2004-08-01 00:06:43 EDT (#)
Ranking: -2
Dear Mother Fucking Newbie
Write better shit or die.
Also, please retaliate against all my posts, not just a few. Doing it half assed just makes you look even more retarded. You missed some of them
Love,
Alahackbar
Submitted by ThatOneGirl (user info) at 2004-07-31 21:26:25 EDT (#)
Ranking: -2
Been there, done that.
Submitted by 01011010 (user info) at 2004-07-31 18:41:26 EDT (#)
Ranking: -2
"LOL @ THIS UNORIGINAL BASTARD"...
Submitted by Lynne (user info) at 2004-07-31 18:34:52 EDT (#)
Ranking: 0
Entertaining... not that I HAVEN'T seen it before... but entertaining.
Submitted by youarsoghey (user info) at 2004-07-31 18:16:42 EDT (#)
Ranking: -2
No Comment
Submitted by NerfHerder (user info) at 2004-07-31 18:12:14 EDT (#)
Ranking: -2
mmmm unoriginal.
Submitted by shadowdragon (user info) at 2004-07-31 18:08:51 EDT (#)
Ranking: -2
You ARE an idiot. Not only did you just knock your last post into oblivion by creating this one, but BOTH of them were not your work. Just leave before you get banned.
Submitted by toyo (user info) at 2004-07-31 18:08:17 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
Raise your hand if you tried this.