Path of Thorns : Healing sexually after rape (7364 hits)
Category: NoneRating: 1.22 on 260 reviews (Rate this item) (V)
Submitted by Lojope <lojope.at.juno.com> (View user info) at 2004-08-03 16:00:30 EDT
I had always been very clear on my opinions on sex. My whole life, I was a Wait Until Marriage girl. I knew what I wanted, and what I was willing to do, and sexual activity was broken down into categories.
Kissing/Holding Hands - just for fun, I'd do it with anybody
Making Out/Light Petting - with someone I liked
Heavy Petting - with someone I really liked
Oral Sex - with someone I was in love with
But sex, ah... Sex, I was saving. Sex was going to be something sacred. Something special. Just me and my husband. One person for the rest of my life. It was a wonderful, romantic, magic idea. I had been planning it my whole life. On my wedding night, all I wanted was the ability to say "I knew that I would love you before I ever met you. And I saved this for you, and only you." It was a lovely plan.
But sometimes, more often than not unfortunately, life has other plans. My senior year of highschool, when I was an eighteen-year-old virgin, I was raped. My plans, my dreams, my gift for my husband... all gone in a matter of minutes. Taken from me.
The people closest to me, the ones who knew how important my virginity was to me, tried to make it better. "You didn't really lose it," they'd say. "If it wasn't your choice, it doesn't count." I wanted to believe them. But in my mind, the logic was simple. If someone punches you in the face, and knocks out a tooth, that tooth is gone whether you chose to let them punch you or not.
I knew that the best I could hope for now was, on my wedding night, to say, "Well... I meant to save this for you, my love.... but---"
Doesn't have quite the same magic to it, does it?
I don't know what it's like for people who lose their virginity the old fashioned way, you know, in their parent's basement or in the back seat of their boyfriend's car, but I envy them.
For me, after the rape, all I knew of sex was fear, pain, and humiliation. Not only was it something I didn't want to do again, it was something I was terrified of. I couldn't talk about it. I couldn't watch it in a movie. Even the most romantic love scene in the world made me cringe and turn away in tears. I pushed my boyfriend away if he kissed me for too long.
In the summer that followed, I used to stay up all night and in the morning, after his parents had left for work, drive to my boyfriend's house, to crawl into bed with him. I couldn't sleep alone. There were too many nightmares and flashbacks. I would sleep next to him, with one hand on his skin for comfort. But I couldn't let him touch me. I craved contact with him and was repulsed by it at the same time. My body wanted affection, but my mind couldn't handle it.
As the summer progressed, with a lot of patience on his part, and a lot of concentration on my part, we worked on our physical relationship. Starting off by kissing until I panicked, then working through it, and kissing some more. Everyday we would try to be intimate, try to teach my mind that he was safe, that not all boys were rapists, that not all physical contact was painful.
It was hard work, but we managed to get back to the physical relationship we'd had before. Though it was still interrupted by the occasional flashback, for the most part, things were back to normal.
But there was still the sex problem.
I still feared it more than anything in the world.
On August 11th, as we sat watching a movie in his livingroom, my boyfriend proposed to me. He said that after all we'd made it through, he was sure we were made for each other. He wanted to spend the rest of his life with me. I said yes, and experienced a few moments of pure joy, before remembering that engagement meant marriage, and marriage meant sex.
Fear.
He knew what I was thinking. He took me by the hand gently and led me upstairs to his bedroom. As he kissed me he whispered to me not to be afraid. That he was going to show me what sex should be like. That he loved me and he'd never hurt me.
We made love that day, and it was beautiful. When it was over, I kissed him and rolled over. I felt whole again. Like I had finally defeated my rapist once and for all. I remember thinking, "Fuck you. You tried, but you couldn't take this from me. I just had sex with my husband-to-be, and it was wonderful. I defeated you."
I wish I could say that we had a wonderful sex life after that. But it wasn't. Not always. There were many times when I would have flashbacks and panic attacks mid-coitus. And even when I did it, I was in the wrong place in my head.
I wasn't having sex because I loved my fiance. I did love him, but that's not what I thought about. I wasn't even having sex because it felt good, because half the time I faked my orgasms to make it stop before the panic took over. I was having sex to beat my rapist. It was all I thought about. Every time we slept together I was thinking, "I can do this, even though he raped me. He can't take it away from me. I win."
It wasn't healthy, and it certainly wasn't fair to my fiancé.
That attitude took over in other parts of my life. I became a huge flirt, and a potty-mouth. I was vulgar every chance I got. And in my mind, it was all about the rape. With every dirty joke I told, I imagined one more link in the chain the rape had bound to me falling apart.
After I got pregnant, and my fiancé took off, I lost a lot of the healing I had achieved. So much of it had been based on him, when he left, he took most of my strongholds with him.
Again, sex became something to fear.
A few months after my son was born, I found out my ex had slept with someone else. It drove me crazy, and into the arms of a one night stand. Bad idea. It hurt (as the first time having sex after childbirth tends to do) and I felt like shit afterwards. Again, I didn't have sex because I cared about the person, or even just because it felt good. It was still about defeating someone. This time, it was my ex. "Fuck you. You can fuck someone else? So what?! I can too!"
What followed was a period of self-induced celibacy. I knew I needed time to get my head on straight. I needed to figure out my feelings about sex again, without the actual sex clouding the facts. I needed to be clear with myself, like I was before the rape happened at all.
So I spent the next few months doing that. I realized that if I wanted to, I could stop completely and wait for my husband. That not being a virgin anymore was irrelevant. Just because I had sex, doesn't mean I had to keep having sex. I realized that I was in control. And as I thought and wrote, and worked things through in my mind, I was able to see how I really felt.
And what I really wanted was a normal sex life. I wanted to sleep with someone if I felt like it, and not sleep with them if that's how I felt. I didn't want to make anymore plans for myself, because plans can get ruined. I didn't want categories or rules, because every situation is different, and the same rules can't apply to them all. I just wanted to be comfortable in my own skin. I didn't want to choose what to do based on a scumbag rapist or a scumbag ex. I just wanted the freedom to choose for myself.
I think I can finally see.
Recently, I have had a few sexual encounters. Healthy sexual encounters. Not because of the rape. Not because of my ex. Because I wanted them. And I enjoyed them. Immensely.
It's good to be healthy.
User Reviews
Submitted by Axolotl (user info) at 2008-06-11 16:42:15 EDT (#)
Ranking: 0
lmao
I pronounce lojope like Loh-Johp
but i think it could be spanish, like Loh-hoh-pay
Submitted by Method (user info) at 2008-06-11 16:25:00 EDT (#)
Ranking: 0
hi!
Submitted by CaptainThorns (user info) at 2007-10-11 16:57:29 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
Did someone call my name?
Submitted by Caulaincourt (user info) at 2007-04-11 15:19:21 EDT (#)
Ranking: -2
this post is a lie
Submitted by AsshOly (user info) at 2007-04-11 01:05:41 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
right, who am i kidding, i've told my real life friends lojope was raped pass it on. i get looks.
Submitted by AsshOly (user info) at 2007-04-11 01:05:03 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
consider it passed. away. as in dead. <---the joke.
Submitted by Axolotl (user info) at 2007-04-10 22:12:32 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
lojope got raped, pass it on
Submitted by Amontillado (user info) at 2007-04-10 20:54:13 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
No Comment
Submitted by manic_impressive (user info) at 2007-04-10 19:09:47 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
Rape is only ok where there is consent. From your homeboys.
Submitted by Adamdidit2u (user info) at 2007-04-10 19:05:58 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
rape is like candy.
Submitted by darko (user info) at 2007-02-04 15:53:39 EST (#)
Ranking: 0
Submitted by darko (user info) at 2006-10-18 10:43:30 (#)
Ranking: -2
Worst post evar
Submitted by forensicgirl3 (user info) at 2007-02-04 15:45:05 EST (#)
Ranking: 0
Jesus Christ! Why the fuck has this been bumped?!
Maltese, SHUT THE MOTHERFUCKING HELL UP! You are a shit headed child.
This Uber joke has long ago played itself out.
Goddamn, the NEXT time you get banned, I hope Bart makes it permanent.
Submitted by rad1101 (user info) at 2007-02-04 15:31:33 EST (#)
Ranking: 0
maltese shut up
Submitted by hot_pocket (user info) at 2007-02-04 15:22:48 EST (#)
Ranking: 0
.. all gone in a matter of minutes
--------------------
that sucks
Submitted by Maltese (user info) at 2007-02-04 15:08:54 EST (#)
Ranking: -2
There are children starving in Africa, but OHNOES!!! Lojo got raped!!! That's so serious and horrible!!!1!
Submitted by Axolotl (user info) at 2006-12-04 11:55:38 EST (#)
Ranking: -2
best post ever
Submitted by ShakeyBear (user info) at 2006-11-24 09:13:47 EST (#)
Ranking: -2
It's also good to be dumb.
Oh wait, it ISN'T
It's funny how people can be so anal about things that aren't a big deal, or at least aren't an immediate massive dilemma. Likewise, they can go on for endless amounts of time perpetuating pain and idiocy as a result of the very same ancient act that put them off kilter.
There's something more painful about chronic idiocy, as opposed to brief rape. Not that I condone rape, but your weak inability to stand up to one single event in the past over an embaressing amount of time and then lash out on OTHERS is very telling.
Submitted by darko (user info) at 2006-10-18 10:43:30 EDT (#)
Ranking: -2
Worst post evar
Submitted by apollo88 (user info) at 2006-09-12 19:46:56 EDT (#)
Ranking: 0
Submitted by Circe (user info) at 2004-08-09 23:28:58 (#)
Ranking: 0
Hidden said -
"i would imagine it to be even harder if a woman was struggling; almost impossible even. especially without her being able to lubricate, unless women can do so in times of duress. like i said, i don't have a vagina, but i'm guessing not. what yidele is saying is, if you really don't want someone to rape you, you will fight back."
This has nothing to do with lojope's situation. I'm just replying to this comment.
If someone, bigger than me, smaller than me, no matter, held a knife at my throat or a gun to my head and said "I'm going to fuck you, and you're going to let me", then he would fuck me. I want to fucking live. If he said 'scream and I'll snap your neck' I would be quiet. Physically being overwhelmed isn't everything. Fear is a very powerful influence. I don't much care if this makes me weak, and I don't give a fuck if it makes me a victim. I'm going to do whatever I have to do to be alive after he's done with me.
And comments like "I'd twist the knife out of his hand and cut his throat because I'm a badass motherfucker" are all well and good, but unless I'm one hundred percent certain I can beat him, I'm not taking the chance.
And as to the 'non-lubrication' thing, the body is a very well designed piece of machinery. It happens, whether you will it or not, because it's the only alternative to being shredded and torn like lettuce. """
i'm going to print this off and have a wank right now.
Submitted by Maltese (user info) at 2006-09-12 19:28:11 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
Rape me
Rape me my friend
Rape me
Rape me again
Im not the only one (x4)
Hate me
Do it and do it again
Waste me
Rape me my friend
Im not the only one (x4)
My favorite inside source
Ill kiss your open sores
Appreciate your concern
Youll always stink and burn
Rape me
Rape me my friend
Rape me
Rape me again
Im not the only one (x4)
Rape me! (x9)
----
Sorry...
Just had to do that...
Sorry about the rape. I really am. Don't let KoolMang get to ya.
Submitted by DCWoody (user info) at 2006-07-06 10:47:48 EDT (#)
Ranking: 1
YEah, reasonably attention keeping, bullshit or not.
Submitted by Tracer0351 (user info) at 2006-07-06 10:34:09 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
Well, Where to start...
First off, well writen, true or not.
If it is true, I'm glad to see that you seem to be getting over it and moving on. I personaly believe you. The problem with the whole thing is the number of women who only cry rape the next day. If this is one of those cases, then I feel sorry for the man. But, if,as I believe, it was a true case of rape, I'll be the first to fire up the old chainsaw. Fact of the matter? I don't know, I wasn't there. AND NEATHER WERE ANY OF YOU FUCKWITS! So, read an oustanding post, THINK what you will of it, and the author, then shut your traps.
+2
Submitted by DCWoody (user info) at 2006-07-06 09:58:51 EDT (#)
Ranking: 0
This is the first time, I have ever actually seen this post. And I have to say that after reading it and many of her reviews I'm highly suspiscious that it ever happened. I guess I'm just a natural cynic.
Submitted by rad1101 (user info) at 2006-07-06 09:45:40 EDT (#)
Ranking: 0
Submitted by rad1101 (user info) at 2005-12-31 01:15:32 (#)
Ranking: 0
I like it when I have a hard time getting it in.
================
I can't believe I said this.
Submitted by redskieslookfake (user info) at 2006-07-06 09:36:29 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
I hope you are a complete liar. Because then this wouldn't be true.
Either way, I think it deserves a +2
Submitted by darko (user info) at 2006-07-06 09:25:11 EDT (#)
Ranking: -2
Worst post ever.
Submitted by Method (user info) at 2006-07-06 09:20:03 EDT (#)
Ranking: 0
haha
Submitted by Jeanneee (user info) at 2006-06-11 19:50:22 EDT (#)
Ranking: 0
If you read the reviews from the bottom up, you can actually spot the moment Ubersite lost whatever semblance of political or moral correctness it once may have had.
Submitted by Ingsoc (user info) at 2006-06-11 19:19:25 EDT (#)
Ranking: -2
PUSH IT TO THE LIMIT!
Submitted by Wiggles (user info) at 2006-06-02 09:36:17 EDT (#)
Ranking: -2
rape?
Submitted by Khoublaikhan (user info) at 2006-05-16 04:12:18 EDT (#)
Ranking: -2
Submitted by Dead_0hi0_Sky (user info) at 2005-09-16 22:31:00 (#)
Ranking: -1
jesus, another rape post?
this would've been 1,000,000,000,002 times better if it was titled:
"path of thorns: healing sexually after rape, as told through the perspective of Optimus Prime"
OP makes me hard.
Submitted by Istaros (user info) at 2005-09-16 22:11:46 (#)
Ranking: -2
you give rape a bad name
Submitted by dategrape (user info) at 2004-08-05 09:48:06 (#)
Ranking: -2
Submitted by Durae (user info) at 2004-08-05 02:03:32 (#)
Ranking: 2
I hope yidele dies.
And that's not even the beer talking.
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No, it's lojope. OH WHOOPS I FORGOT TO LOG OUT OF TEH DURAE AND ACCIDENTALLY REPLIED AS THEM. You are full of shit. You set up multiple accounts to +2 your own fucking hitwhore post.
Submitted by Amorphous (user info) at 2006-02-19 21:14:40 EST (#)
Ranking: -2
So this was the famous post.
Submitted by redskieslookfake (user info) at 2006-02-06 15:40:16 EST (#)
Ranking: 2
No Comment
Submitted by a_reader (user info) at 2005-12-31 01:20:06 EST (#)
Ranking: -1
Submitted by rad1101 (user info) at 2005-12-31 01:14:59 (#)
Ranking: 0
apparently getting raped turns you from a conservative minded person with values to a bleeding-heart libertine with no morals.
-----
Funny, because after the first time you're on the donating end of a rape, you change from that bleeding heart libertine to a conservative minded loudmouth.
Submitted by rad1101 (user info) at 2005-12-31 01:15:32 EST (#)
Ranking: 0
I like it when I have a hard time getting it in.
Submitted by rad1101 (user info) at 2005-12-31 01:14:59 EST (#)
Ranking: 0
apparently getting raped turns you from a conservative minded person with values to a bleeding-heart libertine with no morals.
Submitted by a_reader (user info) at 2005-12-31 01:09:21 EST (#)
Ranking: -2
If it were 1 year ago, I'd spoof this post:
Path of Horns: Healing Anally after Being Gored in the Ass by a Bull.
Submitted by Death_Metal_Dude (user info) at 2005-12-31 00:51:10 EST (#)
Ranking: -2
EPIC BUMP
Submitted by HighFructoseCornSyrup (user info) at 2005-10-09 13:43:37 EDT (#)
Ranking: -2
Man there are some shameful reviews down there.
Submitted by Slighty_Obnoxious (user info) at 2005-10-09 13:20:32 EDT (#)
Ranking: -2
; )
Submitted by Ingsoc (user info) at 2005-09-17 20:28:19 EDT (#)
Ranking: -2
Shot thru the heart, and you're to blame...
______________________________________________
Submitted by Istaros (user info) at 2005-09-16 22:11:46 (#)
Ranking: -2
you give rape a bad name
Submitted by Istaros (user info) at 2005-09-16 23:28:16 EDT (#)
Ranking: -2
holy GAY post batman
Submitted by Spuds002 (user info) at 2005-09-16 23:14:18 EDT (#)
Ranking: 0
holy old post batman
Submitted by Istaros (user info) at 2005-09-16 22:54:36 EDT (#)
Ranking: -2
"Optimus Prime is like three times the size of Robocop and he eats Energon fer fucksakes!
He could just weld Robocop to his crotch and use him as his pecker."
-wazzawazzayo
Submitted by Dead_0hi0_Sky (user info) at 2005-09-16 22:31:00 EDT (#)
Ranking: -1
jesus, another rape post?
this would've been 1,000,000,000,002 times better if it was titled:
"path of thorns: healing sexually after rape, as told through the perspective of Optimus Prime"
OP makes me hard.
Submitted by Istaros (user info) at 2005-09-16 22:11:46 EDT (#)
Ranking: -2
you give rape a bad name
Submitted by williamson (user info) at 2005-09-16 21:04:10 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
Skate it off
Submitted by KoolMung (user info) at 2004-12-06 21:30:26 EST (#)
Ranking: -2
I bet you get bullied a lot.
Submitted by disgruntled (user info) at 2004-11-04 23:28:23 EST (#)
Ranking: -2
That's ok. Some cunts deserve to be raped. You just happened to be one of them.
Submitted by JonnyX (user info) at 2004-11-03 18:29:26 EST (#)
Ranking: 0
Because we're all tired of election posts, here's an oldie but a goodie!
Submitted by Random Joe at 2004-10-19 19:48:04 EDT (#)
Ranking: -2
fucking slut
Submitted by BlinkSparky (user info) at 2004-10-16 23:08:24 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
"It was taken from me in a couple of minutes" - damn so not only was he a rapist but a crappy root :P
"i read as far as petting, youre religious im guessing, what the hell is petting anyway, i pet my dog is that wrong."
AHAHAAHAHAHAHAHHAHAHAHAHA
I didnt really know much about rape until i read this, i never thought it was that bad.
Thankyou for changing my opinion on this
But as someone did comment, i do believe there is a difference between a rape and a bitch going along with something they dont want to and then calling it rape.... you were raped
and i hope that guy gets slammed from behind
Submitted by MouRNIngLoRY (user info) at 2004-09-14 14:33:23 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
I'm glad someone wrote something about this, even though the last review was a month ago. I have been dealing with this same thing for quite some time, and I completely understand where you said you were getting back at your rapist by having and enjoying sex, even though you were faking it half the time anyway.
I have failed at every relationship I have ever tried to suceed in, failed with every sexual attempt i have been in. My roommates (the drag queens) just assume I'm a lesbian because I don't date men. Honestly, men scare me, and it takes a lot to trust them.
I was raped by my sister's babysitter's son and his best friend when i was eleven, along with many other things that happened that have shaped me into who I am today, which ultimately has made me a stronger person after years of cutting myself and half-assed suicide attempts.
And well, that's about all I have to say.
Submitted by I_Have_a_Kristen_Fetish (user info) at 2004-08-12 11:22:05 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
Submitted by lojope (user info) at 2004-08-12 11:17:48 (#)
Ranking: 2
Go +2 every post I have ever written, Bitch.
And make me a sandwich. :o)
Submitted by Circe (user info) at 2004-08-10 04:49:01 EDT (#)
Ranking: 1
Anansie, I'm not saying that I'm too weak to fight. I don't WANT to be raped, and I'm not a weakling. Kicking, punching, I'm tough, I can win, and all the rest of it is great and good and fine. But there is a world of difference between wrestling with guys and having a knife at your throat.
All I'm saying is that you don't have to be physically overpowered to be raped. No weapon? Sure, I'll fight with everything in me. But if he can end my life on a whim? Fuck no.
I think I'd rather be able to go home to my kids than to have somebody tell them 'A bad man killed your mother, but at least she fought.'
Submitted by Anansie (user info) at 2004-08-10 02:46:07 EDT (#)
Ranking: 1
That reply was to hidden and Circe's conversation.
Submitted by Anansie (user info) at 2004-08-10 02:44:44 EDT (#)
Ranking: 1
I don't know. I used to think I was pretty tough. I've wrestled with a few guy friends before and they always kicked my ass. Maybe I'm just a wuss, but guys are generally stronger than women. They had a hard time, but they still kicked my ass in the end, and I'm pretty sure they were holding back somewhat because they didn't want to hurt me. But then, I was holding back too. I always say that if someone tried to rape me, I would make it as difficult as possible, but shit. I can't really say for sure, since (thankfully) I haven't been in that situation. I like to think that if anyone was trying to hurt me I'd kick, punch, bite, and do whatever it took. I think all people respond differently to the threat of physical harm. Some people freeze up, some give up, some fight tooth and nail.
I see what you're saying hidden. But I remember thinking when I wrestled them that I wasn't anywhere near as tough as I had thought. I mean, I put up a pretty good fight, but if a guy decided to punch the shit out of me I'm might be too dazed to be able to fight back. I think a good solid punch to the head or brandishing a weapon would be what it would take.
I hope I never have to find out.
Submitted by hidden101 (user info) at 2004-08-09 23:52:53 EDT (#)
Ranking: 0
thank you, Circe. i was wondering about the lubrication thing. also, you may be right about the fear thing, but i don't know how i'd react, personally. i'm a stubborn person, and although i may get scared, it's never kept me from reacting. even with a gun in my face. but i'll keep my near death experiences out of this. i know most people aren't really like that, though. anyway, i don't want to sound niave, but i really was wondering about it, because to tell you the truth, i can't see it being physically possible for someone like me to be able to rape someone.
Submitted by Circe (user info) at 2004-08-09 23:28:58 EDT (#)
Ranking: 0
Hidden said -
"i would imagine it to be even harder if a woman was struggling; almost impossible even. especially without her being able to lubricate, unless women can do so in times of duress. like i said, i don't have a vagina, but i'm guessing not. what yidele is saying is, if you really don't want someone to rape you, you will fight back."
This has nothing to do with lojope's situation. I'm just replying to this comment.
If someone, bigger than me, smaller than me, no matter, held a knife at my throat or a gun to my head and said "I'm going to fuck you, and you're going to let me", then he would fuck me. I want to fucking live. If he said 'scream and I'll snap your neck' I would be quiet. Physically being overwhelmed isn't everything. Fear is a very powerful influence. I don't much care if this makes me weak, and I don't give a fuck if it makes me a victim. I'm going to do whatever I have to do to be alive after he's done with me.
And comments like "I'd twist the knife out of his hand and cut his throat because I'm a badass motherfucker" are all well and good, but unless I'm one hundred percent certain I can beat him, I'm not taking the chance.
And as to the 'non-lubrication' thing, the body is a very well designed piece of machinery. It happens, whether you will it or not, because it's the only alternative to being shredded and torn like lettuce.
Submitted by yidele (user info) at 2004-08-09 20:49:52 EDT (#)
Ranking: -2
Ok, I've read your sob story and I still don't buy it. I hereby nominate you for the highly prized position of pity whore extraordinaire.
Submitted by lojope (user info) at 2004-08-09 20:33:41 EDT (#)
Ranking: 0
It's funny how you talk like you know what you're talking about. He wasn't my boyfriend. I have always said that it went to court. Go read my old post Three and a Half Lifetimes. I don't know why you think you know what happened, but you don't, and you make yourself sound like an idiot.
Submitted by yidele (user info) at 2004-08-09 20:20:51 EDT (#)
Ranking: -2
funny how your story evolves, lojo. SO what you're saying is that a jury of 12 decided that you were a slut on the strenght of what evidence? You can't just dismiss a crminal case, there would have to be a finding of guilty or innocent, unless the state decide you were a slush, and juries tend to side with women, which effectively means that 12 jurors good & true thought your story to be as full of shit as I say it is & they found your boyfriend innocent, DESPITE the inherent pro-woman bias. SO now, instead of simply being a slush gone wild, you're a court certified rough sex enthusiast.
Submitted by lojope (user info) at 2004-08-09 20:08:31 EDT (#)
Ranking: 0
Uh, the police did investigate, fucktard. I went to trial, in front of a jury. It was dismissed due to lack of evidence later on though.
Submitted by yidele (user info) at 2004-08-09 18:31:11 EDT (#)
Ranking: -2
sorry there lojo, but if you had signs of physical abuse on you - shiners, bruises, etc. there is no way the police could ignore this, by law. If a woman makes a complaint about rape or abuse and there are physical signs, they HAVE TO investigate. If they ignored this, you should by rights be the proud owner of your local PD. any lawyer would take such a case, they are notorious moneymakers.I think you're either terribly naiive and lying, or just lying. hit harlot.
Submitted by lojope (user info) at 2004-08-09 14:34:02 EDT (#)
Ranking: 0
I fought back. He was a football player, and much bigger than me. I had lots of bruises and stuff. An almost perfect handprint shaped bruise on my left arm. But he claimed that it was just mutual rough sex and because there was no one else around, I couldn't prove him wrong.
Submitted by hidden101 (user info) at 2004-08-09 14:22:45 EDT (#)
Ranking: 0
Submitted by Durae (user info) at 2004-08-05 02:03:32 (#)
Ranking: 2
I hope yidele dies.
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Submitted by yidele (user info) at 2004-08-05 06:18:43 (#)
Ranking: 0
as do I. Who wants to live forever?
===========================================================
that was hilarious. seriously. i can't stop laughing.
i wanted to comment on yidele's position. i'm assuming he has said these things due to the fact that he believes that rape simply cannot happen unless someone much larger than you that could easily overpower you did it. i don't see why his point of view is so hard to see. i'm not going to say anything about lojope's situation because i wasn't there and i know nothing about it, but yidele makes his point loud and clear. i don't have a vagina, but i've penetrated plenty of them to know that penises don't just slide right in. i know i have a fairly large penis (you know i couldn't resist saying it), but i'm just saying, for me, it takes some work to get it in there. i would imagine it to be even harder if a woman was struggling; almost impossible even. especially without her being able to lubricate, unless women can do so in times of duress. like i said, i don't have a vagina, but i'm guessing not. what yidele is saying is, if you really don't want someone to rape you, you will fight back. once again, what i'm saying applies to lojope's situation in no way whatsoever because i don't know what happened. if someone wanted a piece of my sweet, sweet ass, and i didn't want them in there, pounding the poo out of me, i would clench my asshole so tight it could sever a penis like bolt cutters through a Master Lock. seriously, though, they would need to have every limb of mine bound very tightly, because unless my movement is completely restricted, there's no way i'm getting raped. i'll fight until i can't fight anymore. but that's just me.
i'm not saying yidele is right about lojope; there are always extenuating circumstances. but he does make a good argument for many women that claim they were "raped" when in reality, they just went along with something they didn't want to do and called it rape afterwards. most women act like men never get into similar situations. they're wrong. we still have room to talk whether you want to believe it or not.
Submitted by Bom, bom, bom at 2004-08-09 07:12:57 EDT (#)
Ranking: 0
What the hell? I mean, it was written alright but what the actual post about was you shagging people? Don't get me wrong, it's sad about the rape and all, but do you not think this is the kind of stuff that should be written down in a personal diary?
This ain't the kind of stuff you should post here.
Submitted by apple_tush (user info) at 2004-08-09 05:00:28 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
Unfortunately in the line of work I do I come face-to-face with the sick people
who commit such crimes. The thing that really winds me up is that the majority
are either serial rapists or show absolutely no remorse for their victims.
We live in a world where ignorance is considered bliss. Sigh. How I wish this were
not true for many a situation.
~apple~
Submitted by Screwyouall (user info) at 2004-08-08 18:48:29 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
beautiful
Submitted by yidele (user info) at 2004-08-08 17:10:16 EDT (#)
Ranking: -2
methinks those ladies do protest too much
Submitted by KoolMang (user info) at 2004-08-08 16:10:12 EDT (#)
Ranking: 0
OMG LOJOPE YOU'RE SUCH A FUCKING HIT WHORE!
BART, CAP HER HITS! :P
Submitted by Bennywild (user info) at 2004-08-08 15:17:23 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
I have a very good friend who has had a similar problem. Nothing shocks you back to reality like reading court documents of a child sexual abuse case. It takes some balls to write that kind of thing, even anonymously on the net.
Submitted by LadyPlural (user info) at 2004-08-08 12:00:51 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
Yidele, you're REALLY not making any sense. Yes, I fragmented myself when I was very little because the world was too confusing to deal with as a whole, but that simply involved divorcing most of my emotions from eachother. Yes, the name Lady Plural is a bit of a play on that. I do not have multiple personality disorder, so I'm not too sure where you're coming from. Care to enlighten us? Ha. I am so funny. Seriously.
Submitted by burko (user info) at 2004-08-08 10:15:42 EDT (#)
Ranking: 0
Already at least three spin offs from this post
People are capitalising on this...pathetic
Submitted by SpikeGoddess (user info) at 2004-08-08 07:08:55 EDT (#)
Ranking: 0
Anyone who used this post as a jumping off point for personal attacks and derogatory statements has lost any shred of respect I may have ever had for him/her. There are times that it is best to keep unfounded opinions to yourself.
Lojope, I am very sorry this happened to you.
Submitted by yidele (user info) at 2004-08-08 03:33:52 EDT (#)
Ranking: -2
so, i guess this must be the another part of the collaborative effort, eh? the "gee, mr, I don't know what you're talking 'bout" one....truly, the right hand doth not know what the left doeth. Lady Plural indeed.
Submitted by LadyPlural (user info) at 2004-08-07 17:18:26 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
Ummmm... Yidele, what the hell are you talking about? I'm not too sure exactly what you're talking about, so I hereby terminate this strange conversation.
Submitted by Stin (user info) at 2004-08-07 12:03:02 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
Love and affection for you from the other side of the water Lojo.
Submitted by lojope <@not logged in> at 2004-08-07 10:25:17 EDT (#)
Ranking: 0
I was saving myself for marriage and now I have a child! Can't you tell how much I valued my virginity, or lack thereof, for my eventual husband? Hypocritical? Why yes, yes I am.
Submitted by yidele (user info) at 2004-08-07 09:58:49 EDT (#)
Ranking: -2
to continue: It is then with some trepidation that I read lojo's story about rape. Rape is not a word to be bandied about when your date turns nasty after you've decided to play with his tackle - not that this in any way excuses the behaviour of a man who molests children, the infirm, the mentally handicapped or someone much weaker than himself, but if you agreed to play, rape it ain't.
On to lojo: By her own admission, it was a male of nearly her age, a close friend, dating her girlfriend, in her own house to boot. Furthermore, she apparently neither defended herself nor put up enough of a struggle for the police to react to what she alleges happened. And this last part is what I find dificult to believe. If rape is such a violent & repugnant act, if she valued her virginity as she declares, if she abhorred this as much as she says, if it was such a humiliating, life changing experience for her ( as she avers) then WHY DIDN'T SHE STRUGGLE? why didn't she fight back enough to show a black eye, scratches, bruises, broken teeth, bleding gums? what about the physical evidence? Unless we're talking rape by Mike Tyson or Goldberg, there is no excuse.
lojo's story: Ladies and Gentlemen, I submit for your consideration another way of interpreting what happened to Lojo. It may not be the truth, but given the "evidence" I at least think that it has just as much if not more of a chance at being close to it;
Lojo's close friend ( read competitor) was dating a boy Lojo fancied. Being alone or perhaps just after a brake-up, lojo decided to bed her friend's boy and perhaps take him away from her, a plan made easier by the fact that boy was her acquaintance as well. To this end she invited him to her house and made a move on his goods. Here we have 2 potential outcomes:
1) boy was red blooded and did as he was bid. afterwards he decided that there was no reason to brake up with his girl, since Lojo was giving it up for free, and this steamed Lojo into making an accusation of rape to her girlfriend, by way of revenge.
2) boy showed some quality and told lojo to fuck herself ( not likely, if he was a regular red blooded boy, but still possible), in revenge for which she accused him of rape in order to fuck up his relations with her girlfriend.
In either scenario, no actual rape occured, explaining why there was no police action, evidence, trial, or incarceration. And Now, Lojo is playing the same pity whore game she played with her friends, except she's doing it on Uber and not at the local Mall.
"Qui penis mihi aqua turbit?"
Submitted by WiKi (user info) at 2004-08-07 08:08:31 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
I'm sure I could go on a long tangent about this, but it's 8am and I'm at work. Also, I've never had any experience with rape. At all. Not with myself, my family, nor my friends. So I just want to say one thing..
This was a wonderful piece of writing and I love you, Lojope.
Submitted by yidele (user info) at 2004-08-07 07:12:31 EDT (#)
Ranking: 0
So, mrs. too angry to finish, since you usually claim you're a collaborative identity, may I assume that these various experiences happened to different components of you? And since we're on components, are you just a corporally single crazy bitch with a multiple personality disorder or several physical instances of the same? Which part of you is too angry to write? Do these questions make sense to you?
I have fair-to-extensive experience of/with crazy bitches, and I don't mean your usual, run-of-the-mill late teen in a post-highschool funk, either. What I mean is certifiably crazy, commited, physiologically imbalanced women, some with organic brain disorders. It is my experience that such women oft use the accusation of rape as a way to get attention, pity, or just a reaction out of someone and that such accusations are mostly untrue in the sense that rape, or violent rape is most often understood. This is not to say that sexual activity did not take place NOR that the woman in question may have had misgivings about the act AFTERWARDS or even mid-coitus, but that forced "oh-please-don't-do-this-I'm-saving-myself-for-marriage" rape often did not happen.
As controversial as it may seem to some of you, especially the wanna-be men who promise to torture and dismember rapists out of poon-hunger, I think that in many cases Women are at least partially responsible for what happens to them.
Oh, I know most of you are boiling right about now, and rightly so. It is high time to dispense with the insidious lie, the notion that responsibility for one's actions ends at the poon-line. If we think about this rationally, we'd likely agree that a drunken, obnoxious, violent man, jacking his shit in public may suffer death or at least a beating at the hands of police or just a concerned citizen and most of you would probably congratulate the police for a job well done. Additionally, if someone were to simply punch him out, he would likely draw more prase than censure. Ask yourself why it is that when a drunken, violent, obnoxious slut is consensually fucked, you censure the man and not the slut, if she happens to change her opinion of what went on AFTER she sobers up? Why is it that no one expect a drunken slutpuppy to accept the responsibility for her behaviour and everyone agrees that the drunk man should? why the double standard?
Responsibility is the flipside of emancipation. If women are truly to be emancipated, they should be responsible for their actions, including falsely accusing someone of rape. I have to go now, though I may continue later; and I'm not too angry to do it, neither, I simply have to go with my wife and kiddies to an antique auction. Bayeee!
Submitted by burko (user info) at 2004-08-07 06:17:54 EDT (#)
Ranking: -1
Rape is terrible.........but I dont think this is a good piece of writing, nor was it amusing(duh) or interesting.
Sorry.
Submitted by Ryo (user info) at 2004-08-07 03:37:50 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
...I Can't say anything that can convey how I feel.
I would not wish what happend to you on my worst enemy. But at the same time that I feel that utter anger and sadness, I feel a great sense of hapiness for you, having overcome this. I doubt I could do the same if I was in that situation.
Submitted by LadyPlural (user info) at 2004-08-06 18:40:55 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
For some reason, writing that wasn't as catharsis-filled as I would have hoped.
Submitted by LadyPlural (user info) at 2004-08-06 18:35:38 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
I find it ironic that everyone who is saying "Oh, I think that rape victims are asking for it/could have stopped it if they REALLY wanted to/should get over it" have never been raped. Seriously, it is the most humiliating, invasive situation that a person could ever be subjected to. There is a person who is in your body without your consent, doing something that should be one of the most intimate things possible to do with somebody, and when it's finally over (and it never really is), insensitive assholes such as yourselves spew forth absolute shit. Yes, I feel guilty that my uncle hit me over the head when I was 9 years old and raped me. Oh, I'm SURE that I led him on. I mean, everyone knows that nine-year-olds are sluts. There is no logical reason for me to feel guilty, but I do. I feel guilty that one of my mother's boyfriend's friends who was living with us decided that twelve was plenty old enough to get oral sex from him (at age 54). Yeah, I asked him to come into my room and try to
I'm too angry to finish this.
Submitted by KoolMang (user info) at 2004-08-06 17:27:05 EDT (#)
Ranking: -2
Hit whore.
Submitted by jfski (user info) at 2004-08-06 12:55:36 EDT (#)
Ranking: -1
not bad, i just hate reading shit like that because it leaves me pissed off the rest of the day
also, B. Finniff=fuckjob
Submitted by lojope (user info) at 2004-08-06 10:04:19 EDT (#)
Ranking: 0
Glad you were able to get that off your chest. Though, I gotta say, I couldn't even follow what you were saying. Something about me being a liar or a hitwhore or childish or religious or... naw... you lost me.
Submitted by Brian Finniff <brianfinniff.at.unixforge.org> at 2004-08-06 07:04:20 EDT (#)
Ranking: -2
You know, reading that actually made me feel embarrased, I don't know, sometimes when I read something that I know is either: 1. Blatantly false; or 2. Absolutely naive; or 3. Childish (which is somewhat like #2, #1, except, many people believe it, like religions, no proof what so ever), I get this feeling in my head, "oh no, this is bad". Luckly this is the internet where I can bitch realitively anonymously, and not have to cover my thoughts that it is a great big lie.
Because the service on ubersite is shit and accused me of either using really long words or "not using spaces" or some crap.
Submitted by Brian Finniff <brianfinniff.at.unixforge.org> at 2004-08-06 07:02:50 EDT (#)
Ranking: -2
This post is a google whoring and I heavily doubt it is true.
But if it is:
I am sick of you piece of shit, naive jackass religious fuckers and your bullshit. Oh I got raped, who cares? Anyone can be raped, that's like someone saying "I am saving death for later", it can happen, thus it is insecure to think it won't.
Oh I have such problems having sex now that someone raped me, oh no, boohoo. Big fucking deal, what is the problem? I saw dategrape debunking it, and read a link that was around 200 pages back, it failed it big time so you made another. Also you forgot to logout of that account, I mean seriously, what are we supposed to believe here?
You failed it the first time, but this one was successful because of all the bleeding heart naive shitheads, you fucking hit-whore, glah, it busts my ass to read this crap.
Submitted by Random Joe at 2004-08-06 04:01:32 EDT (#)
Ranking: 0
Submitted by William_Q_Percy (user info) at 2004-08-06 01:44:29 (#)
Ranking: 0
I nominate Yidele as the poet laureate of Uber.
--------------------
Nomination seconded.
Submitted by William_Q_Percy (user info) at 2004-08-06 01:44:29 EDT (#)
Ranking: 0
I nominate Yidele as the poet laureate of Uber.
Submitted by imsogravy (user info) at 2004-08-06 00:23:25 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
Lojope, I am so impressed with what you've done. You've taken possibly(most likely) the worst moment of your life and turned it in to a positive piece of healthy writing. And I've been very close to people throughout my life that have been raped. My dad raped and molested my sister from the time she was 5-11. I dated a girl who was raped by the guy she was dating before I met her. My best friend was raped twice and subsequently, she decided the only way she could heal was to take her own life. To all of you who think it doesn't happen that often, it does. And when it happens to someone close to you, you'll change your tune. But until then you'll continue being the insensitive fucks that you are. But it's okay. From what I've learned, women that have been raped couldn't give a flying fuck what you think abou them. Because it's people like you that enjoy causing others pain. It's people like you that are most likely to do the same thing. And no, these women that have been through it before can't stop, but they can raise the awareness of women(and even men) through things like Lojope has done.
You have my respect Lojope.
Submitted by QueenAshlee (user info) at 2004-08-05 14:13:02 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
I'm sorry, but you're just terribly misinformed. I will again call to attention the instance of someone from this site volunteering their time and services to Razor and firefly when it was needed most. Someone they met on this site. Another event springs to mind, my personal experience. Months ago, I was in a car wreck, which left me stranded hundreds of miles from home. Another Uberer whom I'd had little discourse with, lives in the area I was stuck in. This person offered to open their home to me, if I was in need of a place to stay. So no, don't fucking tell me that people on this site don't care about one another, because I know that they do.
Submitted by FartSmeller (user info) at 2004-08-05 12:34:46 EDT (#)
Ranking: 0
Eat you? No thanks, Queenashlee, I only eat roast beef on sandwiches. And when you say that Uberusers care about each other, I think we all know that's a crock of shit, now don't we? If you would have said, "Uberusers are constantly on the prowl for someone's shitt post to talk trash about", you would have then been absolutely correct. AND WTF?!?!?!?! YOU DIE LOL OMG!!!1tweleveDIE HaR hAR
Submitted by BleedTheSky (user info) at 2004-08-05 11:46:56 EDT (#)
Ranking: -2
Lojope- I'm sorry you're an attention seeking whore.
Wait.
I have an idea...
Submitted by ParlorTrick (user info) at 2004-08-05 10:34:23 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
Lojope - I'm sorry for your experience. I'm glad for your strength. I appreciate your diligence in these follow up explanations. Please see www.ubersite.com/m/40696 (forgive the link), for another case in point. ~ Sandy
Submitted by yidele (user info) at 2004-08-05 10:14:30 EDT (#)
Ranking: 0
Your secret identity is safe with me.
Submitted by lojope (user info) at 2004-08-05 10:04:49 EDT (#)
Ranking: 0
Now that is actually just not true, dategrape. Durae is a friend of mine who was over here yesterday. She'll be at Ubercon if you don't believe me, and several Uberers have met her.
Submitted by dategrape (user info) at 2004-08-05 09:48:06 EDT (#)
Ranking: -2
Submitted by Durae (user info) at 2004-08-05 02:03:32 (#)
Ranking: 2
I hope yidele dies.
And that's not even the beer talking.
----------
No, it's lojope. OH WHOOPS I FORGOT TO LOG OUT OF TEH DURAE AND ACCIDENTALLY REPLIED AS THEM. You are full of shit. You set up multiple accounts to +2 your own fucking hitwhore post.
Submitted by IsawBoobs (user info) at 2004-08-05 09:15:55 EDT (#)
Ranking: 0
i read as far as petting, youre religious im guessing, what the hell is petting anyway, i pet my dog is that wrong.
rape is bad, i once almost killed a guy, all rapists deserve it.
Submitted by tomato-soup (user info) at 2004-08-05 09:03:12 EDT (#)
Ranking: -2
burp
Submitted by yidele (user info) at 2004-08-05 06:18:43 EDT (#)
Ranking: 0
as do I. Who wants to live forever?
Submitted by Walsareck (user info) at 2004-08-05 05:49:31 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
I think all who pick on Lojope, say filthy things, should just shutup. Also, I would like to add, anyone who thinks Lojope should die for posting this or anything else (I've seen it mentioned a few times) should be injured themselves.
Submitted by BleedTheSky (user info) at 2004-08-05 02:48:46 EDT (#)
Ranking: -2
Now that you mention it, I can think of someone who needs to get punched in the face. Her name starts with "L" and ends with "jope".
Submitted by Durae (user info) at 2004-08-05 02:03:32 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
I hope yidele dies.
And that's not even the beer talking.
Submitted by QueenAshlee (user info) at 2004-08-05 00:09:02 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
Give me a few seconds...
Submitted by Kristen (user info) at 2004-08-05 00:06:40 EDT (#)
Ranking: 0
Get on Yahoo.
Submitted by QueenAshlee (user info) at 2004-08-05 00:04:29 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
Yeah, could you? I didn't get anything. Also try QueenAshlee.at.gmail.com in case yahoo is being retarded again. I have SO much to talk to you about.
Submitted by Kristen (user info) at 2004-08-05 00:01:44 EDT (#)
Ranking: 0
I emailed you at the yahoo address, I can resend it if you need me to.
Submitted by QueenAshlee (user info) at 2004-08-04 23:50:31 EDT (#)
Ranking: 0
CRAP I'm not on AOL anymore. Try the yahoo addy if you see this! queenravie.at.yahoo.com
Submitted by QueenAshlee (user info) at 2004-08-04 23:46:57 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
No but I'll go check it RIGHT THIS SECOND. Are you online?
Submitted by Kristen (user info) at 2004-08-04 23:46:26 EDT (#)
Ranking: 0
HAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA
Ashlee said "fartsmeller". Did you get my email, Ashlee?
Submitted by QueenAshlee (user info) at 2004-08-04 23:43:31 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
FartSmeller: I'll take your advice into consideration. In the meantime, please feel free to eat me.
Nice how you ignored the rest of what I said. And can I just point out, for a moment, that the "long time user" in question is -squattail-? SQUATTAIL. The saddest excuse for a human life to grace Uber since Kristy Swan. The one person who, regardless of longevity, is the least likely to understand and realize that Uberers can and do care about each other. Which was my entire point. Oh and do forgive me for not automatically assuming that someone was an alterego of a user who had been banned several times due to the fact that he is a useless waste of skin. Sorry, some of us don't have time to keep up with UberPassions anymore. In closing, shut the fuck up. And die.
Submitted by Shirkinparkin (user info) at 2004-08-04 23:32:43 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
I thought this would be lame, but it wasn't. You're a very emotional writer, this is good.
Submitted by Kaelic (user info) at 2004-08-04 22:16:50 EDT (#)
Ranking: 0
Wow ... it's like, I love Yidele, and I hate him, at the same time. I'm so torn.
Submitted by deserteaglekiller at 2004-08-04 21:35:49 EDT (#)
Ranking: 0
This is why you ladies should carry atleast a .380 in your purse incase someone jumps you, it gives you a chance to fight back. Depending on the laws where you live you can get a concealed carry permit
Submitted by antluvdog (user info) at 2004-08-04 21:15:39 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
No Comment
Submitted by yidele (user info) at 2004-08-04 20:46:35 EDT (#)
Ranking: 0
"how anyone (apart from lojope) could presume to know what actually happened amazes me...."
wow, how profound. How could anyone aside from lowjape know if she's lying? gee, could it be because she's pimping her story for all it's worth? haow about the pitywhore appeal? those are pretty good guesses and guesses are all I have to offer, after all.
to quote myself:
time has come to speak of harlots
Uber surely has her own
Mick's incessant scrotum dwelling
is the uber background-drone
pity harlot, pity whore
begging for attention scraps
death is comfort to be sure
to be free of 'Ginny yaps
cry and wail, piss and moan
is Mick's own constant refrain:
"you'd understand why I am mad
If you only knew my pain!"
Mick's disclosures (they are constant)
universal & profound
make me think of scoot-trash buffoons
trying to impress all'round:
"I'm a fellon!, I'm indicted!
I am satan's only son!
look upon me & beware
my sister's child's undone!"
"There's not much that makes me ill,
there's not much I haven't seen
gutted human? headless baby?
disemboweled, month old spleen?"
"look upon me & beware!
I am full of fearfull stuff!
my friends bury folk in lime
( if you give them any guff)"
My suggestion for you, Mickey
is to keep on what you do
begging for attention scraps
is the thing that works for you
pity harlot, pity whore
begging for attention scraps
death is comfort to be sure
to be free of 'Ginny yaps
keep on begging, keep on bluffing
keep on licking uber-sacks
you provide a definition
which this uber sorely lacks:
pity harlot, pity whore
begging for attention scraps
you're the uber pity leech
and a leech - it always sucks
Submitted by Scott_James (user info) at 2004-08-04 20:39:13 EDT (#)
Ranking: 0
"Submitted by shandythedog (user info) at 2004-08-04 20:34:37 (#)
Ranking: 0
i wasn't crazy about this post purely from the writing point of view.
how anyone (apart from lojope) could presume to know what actually happened amazes me and shows a frightening stupidity that puts me off uber"
-- Finally, a voice of reason among the chatter.
Submitted by shandythedog (user info) at 2004-08-04 20:34:37 EDT (#)
Ranking: 0
i wasn't crazy about this post purely from the writing point of view.
how anyone (apart from lojope) could presume to know what actually happened amazes me and shows a frightening stupidity that puts me off uber
Submitted by yidele (user info) at 2004-08-04 20:16:57 EDT (#)
Ranking: -1
the balance of you "ladies" jumping in to declare " I was raped too!" makes me think that Uber is now a home for the codependant, attention-deficient skanks.
I'm no expert on rape. Like most men, I've had sex with women who insisted on playing diferent roles/games, including the forced sex ones, but I find it difficult to believe that a healthy, determined woman could not make the act impossible to someone who wasn't physically overwhelming or brandishing a weapon, unless we're talking about date-rape drugs. Unless you were raped by George "the Animal" steele or a knife/gun brandishing psychopath, i find it hard to believe that what you describe as rape is anything else but an aftertought to a bad brakeup or sex games which went a little to far in the direction you did not want them to go. You did after all say that it was a friend.
Likely it was the same guy who mooned over you and declared his love/lust/infatuation to you while you played usual girly games with him, someone too low on your ladder to consider who nevertheless showed a little more determination than you expected. Or maybe not. Perhaps you were really raped and now are pimping the pain for all the cheap hits and attention Uber can muster. Not that it matters much, but I for one call shenannigans.
Of course it wasn't a total loss. Now at least you know that men are cruel monsters at heart, even the ones who love you, and that playing with fire can have consequences.
Submitted by ThisSuckedAss at 2004-08-04 20:05:06 EDT (#)
Ranking: -2
Wow, thank you google for leading me here
Some guy touched your vagina in high school and because you didn't have the guts to tell him no since he was too hot or popular, you expect sympathy from a bunch of stranger on the godamn Internet.
Okay...here's mine: Go. Fuck. Yourself. :(
Submitted by yidele (user info) at 2004-08-04 19:50:02 EDT (#)
Ranking: 0
there is no more abject slavery than giving up the hoop for money. Bums generally don't, and being mostly worthless vermin, they still have that over the whores who make it their profession. whores are the lowest of the low, no matter how hard they work; some things are beyond redemption. Whoredom and murder are such things
Submitted by monkeyrape (user info) at 2004-08-04 19:45:50 EDT (#)
Ranking: 0
fuck that, bums don't work for shit, they stand around at motherfuckin' 7/11 asking for donations for their drinking fund. Fuck bums, they never do shit to earn fuck. Hookers, waste themselves and bleed for the dollar. Thats dedication you'll never find on wallstreet my blind friend. Someone worthless, for someone that earns money with all they have left.
Submitted by FartSmeller (user info) at 2004-08-04 19:44:22 EDT (#)
Ranking: 0
Hmm. First of all, lojope, if this really happened, then that sucks, I was molested at a very young age by a family member, and it's humiliating. If not, and you're spinning a hit-whore tale, then you are a true piece of shit.
QueenAshlee, stop. You're making yourself look like an idiot, and telling people to "die" like you did with squattail is as stale as duck bread. At least it wasn't a sign of true misfiring like your "you know nothing about Uber" assault on a long-time user.
Submitted by yidele (user info) at 2004-08-04 19:39:14 EDT (#)
Ranking: 0
looks down on hookers? I guess he has to if on top.
But really now, who doesn't look down on hookers? even the hookers do, because they know that as far as the scale of personal worth is concerned, whores are at the literal bottom. Street dwelling, dumpster diving, rotten food chowing flea infested bums are inherently more worthwhile than a Man or a Woman who has decided to parlay cum for cash. There are really only two acts which mark a human being for life - one is murder and the other prostitution. I respect murderers more.
Submitted by monkeyrape (user info) at 2004-08-04 19:36:59 EDT (#)
Ranking: 0
Hookers are good people. They need to make a living just like everyone else.
Submitted by shandythedog (user info) at 2004-08-04 19:23:25 EDT (#)
Ranking: 0
chipolatte,
in common with a lot of morons on this site, you seem to look down on hookers.
that's not very nice.
Submitted by monkeyrape (user info) at 2004-08-04 19:15:06 EDT (#)
Ranking: -2
lets all hold hands and cry...fuck rape vitims.
Submitted by lojope (user info) at 2004-08-04 19:09:50 EDT (#)
Ranking: 0
Damn it. That last reply was from me, I didn't realize Durae was logged in on my computer.
Submitted by Durae (user info) at 2004-08-04 19:08:25 EDT (#)
Ranking: 0
Fuck all of you who said that I posted this for attention. I posted it for people like Neko and LadyPlural. And for the three or four people who emailed me. That's who this was for.
Submitted by chipolatte (user info) at 2004-08-04 18:40:11 EDT (#)
Ranking: 0
squattail...trust me, the reason that 60% of your relationships have been with ladies sexually molested is because your relationships consists of hookers, and hookers get raped all the time. I know this because you are an ugly, ugly OOOOGLY human being, and not just your acne ridden face, but also your personality.
I have reservationsa bout this whole topic that I've discussed on the other post that pertains to this (Sundance Kids) so I'm not going to get into it here.
Submitted by LadyPlural (user info) at 2004-08-04 18:16:55 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
Smurfs- Go figure. It happens. I'm sure that a few are just random people jumping on a bandwagon, but...
Submitted by TeenageDirtBag (user info) at 2004-08-04 18:16:31 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
No Comment
Submitted by Smurfs (user info) at 2004-08-04 18:12:55 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
I'm glad for the response this got...
I'm also frankly shocked at the amount of girl on this site who are saying they too are victims of rape...
Submitted by LadyPlural (user info) at 2004-08-04 18:08:14 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
Lojope, you really kick ass. I've been raped once, and almost raped another time, both times by people that I considered to be relatively close to me. I dealt with it by (mentally) putting everything into a little box and burning it. It's mostly worked, with only one or two unfortunate side effects. I think that what I'm trying to say is that you rock, and I am impressed with your ability to write so well about so personal a subject.
Submitted by Gnome (user info) at 2004-08-04 17:51:15 EDT (#)
Ranking: 0
you clearly hit a nerve lojo. nekobakamegami registered just to rate this article.
probably somebody already here but not brave enough to open up with that news.
Submitted by nekobakamegami (user info) at 2004-08-04 17:24:10 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
I wish I was as strong as you. I've been raped twice, and well, fell into a dark pit of shady, ditzy, subserviant dealings with men, trying to find a good one, all while being used. I don't play the victim card on it, I don't think. I don't talk about it that much or whine about it or whatnot. I just am not recovering very well, but I am very inspired by you. Like you, it was a friend. Like, you, I was saving my virginity for my husband. But, my first case never saw paperwork, I was too scared and by the time I went, the police decided I had waited too long. My second case was a stranger and I filed a police report and a rape kit. But nothing ever came of it, my roommate told the police I was lying and that was that. Perhaps one day I can stomach my past and my feelings enough to write as beautifully and inspirationally as you have. You rock.
Submitted by tech-junkie (user info) at 2004-08-04 16:16:58 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
Beautiful.
Sorry your plans didn't quite work out the way you wanted, but I am glad you made do.
Submitted by Trishtopher (user info) at 2004-08-04 15:22:56 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
Lojo is just the ish. That's all there is to it. Uh huh. So there.
Submitted by DaBaddestHic (user info) at 2004-08-04 15:16:54 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
Glad you hung in there and have your life back together now. I wish you the best in this area in the future!
Submitted by BoogieFevuh (user info) at 2004-08-04 15:04:18 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
Lojo, my heart goes out to you. This happened to someone extremely close to me, and over the last year I've slowly helped her to get better. If there's anything I can do for you, or just want someone to talk to, IM me at MetalVikingDeath, or email me at Boogiefevuh.at.hotmail.com.
Submitted by shark25 (user info) at 2004-08-04 13:09:18 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
Submitted by dategrape (user info) at 2004-08-04 06:25:29 (#)
Ranking: -2
Rape is absolutely nothing. These so-called 'victims' have sex every day of their life, and yet the one time they are forced to do they say it traumatized them, because they didn't get to choose their partner. Get over it. And don't say: "I hope one day YOU get raped", because that is different. I feel sorry for victims of anal-rape, male OR female, because the human asshole was not meant for dick. Vag is.
***************************************************************************************************
Little man is just sad because the only way he can have a sexual encounter is by rape and people are putting it down.
Submitted by William_Q_Percy (user info) at 2004-08-04 13:09:08 EDT (#)
Ranking: 0
http://www.ubersite.com/m/23475
Submitted by dategrape (user info) at 2004-08-04 12:50:30 EDT (#)
Ranking: -2
What about spending 500 hours within a 1 nanometer radius?
Submitted by QueenAshlee (user info) at 2004-08-04 12:43:53 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
>>>would rather have every hair plucked out of my head one by one than spend a nanosecond within a 500 mile radius of you<<<
Submitted by dategrape (user info) at 2004-08-04 12:41:38 EDT (#)
Ranking: 0
Ashlee, bring your partner, we'll break off and form a train.
Submitted by dategrape (user info) at 2004-08-04 12:37:26 EDT (#)
Ranking: -2
About 60% of the women I have been involved with had been molested or raped at some point prior to our relationship.
Where the hell do you find these damaged chicks? An outlet store? And how many times were they raped DURING your relationship?
Submitted by QueenAshlee (user info) at 2004-08-04 12:37:24 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
I'm not going because I live a few thousand miles away, douchebag. Couple that with the facts that I'm not single anymore, can't take time off work because they're training me as an assistant manager, and would rather have every hair plucked out of my head one by one than spend a nanosecond within a 500 mile radius of you, and that all adds up to I think I'll stay home and get laid that weekend.
Submitted by Snark (user info) at 2004-08-04 12:32:01 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
About 60% of the women I have been involved with had been molested or raped at some point prior to our relationship. This fact has always very much disturbed me. It's good to see you working through this horrible thing and the scars it left behind.
You are a strong person. You will beat this. Sounds like you are well on your way.
To those of you calling Shenanigans.
I'm not sure I would care that much if it turned out to be. Rape is fucking EVIL and it happens all the time.
To those of you who think it's no big deal. I would like to hear your opinion if it happened to your mom or sister or girlfriend / wife.
Oh well,
This many replies to a post... I guess there are bound to be a few assholes.
Submitted by dategrape (user info) at 2004-08-04 12:31:42 EDT (#)
Ranking: -2
You aren't going because you weren't invited.
Submitted by the_lone_stranger (user info) at 2004-08-04 12:30:57 EDT (#)
Ranking: 0
I am in my underwear doing the healthy beaver celebration dance in the lving room.
Submitted by QueenAshlee (user info) at 2004-08-04 12:25:35 EDT (#)
Ranking: 0
Which would make more sense if I was going...
Submitted by dategrape (user info) at 2004-08-04 12:25:00 EDT (#)
Ranking: 0
You say that now, but chances are you will all be thanking your lucky stars when I make it to ubercon
Submitted by QueenAshlee (user info) at 2004-08-04 12:22:11 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
And I'm SURE squattail falls into the category of useful human beings.
The reason you don't understand that fact that people on this site actually can care about each other, is because nobody fucking cares about you. That includes your family and friends, just so we're clear. They hate you too. You're a useless, stupid waste of skin, a troll whom everyone that matters hates. Did you not realize that when you were banned?? NOBODY WANTS YOU HERE. YOU ARE NOT COOL OR FUNNY OR ORIGONAL. You are NOTHING, here, as in life, and we all just wish you would die.
And actually, I was not aware that dategrape = squattail. I've been away and thus unable to keep up with my UberPassions.
Submitted by dategrape (user info) at 2004-08-04 12:14:20 EDT (#)
Ranking: -2
QueenAshlee, you are speaking to me, squattail, I know how the goddamn site works. I know that when somebody posts something about being raped or having cancer, they get plenty of hits and sympathy votes. I proved it by doing it myself. Lojope is an attention seeking pig.
Submitted by Envenom (user info) at 2004-08-04 12:14:18 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
This reply pissed me off on a couple of levels.
Dategrape, you clearly know nothing about the way Ubersite and its users work.
________________________________________________________________________________
Uh, Ashlee, in case you missed the bulletin, dategrape is squattail
Submitted by 1Point21Gigawatts (user info) at 2004-08-04 12:05:39 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
I have a theory that all men are scumbags. These are big words, coming from a man's mouth. But the truth is, at one point in a man's life, he does some pretty scumbaggish things. Myself included. I'm not a scumbag anymore, and I had never been a scumbad until that stretch of a year or so when I was one. As a woman, you have the challenge of making sure you've seeked out the man who has been a scumbag and isn't anymore. Plenty of men are scumbags their whole life, like I'm sure your rapist was. I would love to shove a cold, blunt object directly up his ass.
Submitted by QueenAshlee (user info) at 2004-08-04 12:04:10 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
Submitted by dategrape (user info) at 2004-08-04 06:51:45 (#)
Ranking: -2
Not only that, this is 100% shenanigans. I would bet a hundred bucks on it. All you write are cliched pieces of boring fiction, lojope, and this is the biggest cliche I have ever read. "Oh, I got raped and I was going to save it until marriage." "Oh, it made sex my enemy, an enemy which I had to battle to defeat my rapist." "Oh, my story is one big cliche in an attempt to get sympathy and better ratings on future posts." You took my advice did you?
"Just a hint people. If you are ever in need of raising your ubersite rank just write a post saying you have a terminal illness/disease. The people on this site go out of their way to make themselves appear 'caring/compassionate etc. etc.', so if you write a post about your so called illness and do it convincingly, many +2s will come your way."
If you were raped, you wouldn't be whoring it out to get cheap hits. You are full of shit, and I am the only one with enough guts to call out. You are an idiot.
_________________
This reply pissed me off on a couple of levels.
Dategrape, you clearly know nothing about the way Ubersite and its users work. You think it's just a website, but it's more than that. It's a community of people. People who get to know each other, people who care about one another and what happens to them or for them. If something bad happens to one of us, we CARE. Look at Razor and firefly's situation, for example. When they were going through a bad time, someone from this site volunteered to give their time, go to their house, and help them through things by doing needed things that firefly was unable to do. Now is that just someone wanting to "appear caring/compassionate?" No. That is an ACTUAL human being, seeing the plight of people he/she cared for, and wanting to help. That is real compassion.
Posting something like this, or anything that has a scarring impact on one's life, is, in my experience, not just a ploy to garner hits and popularity. I myself posted a story some time ago about a major heartbreak I'd been through. I didn't do it for hits, I did it for myself, for the healing value that putting words on paper can have for a person. Writing is often a wonderful tool in the healing process. And not just for one's self, but for others. Maybe there is another Uber-female (or even Uber-male) out there that has been raped, and they see this post, and it helps them to move past their experience. Seeing that someone could go through something so terrible and still be so strong and so loving as Lojope is can do wonders to inspire the same strenth and caring in other people who have gone through something similar, or even people who just need a change in perspective. I personally admire Lojope for her ability to not only carry on so well with her lifr, but her bravery in being able to share something like this with the rest of us.
The next time you think of accusing someone like Lojope of making up something so horrible just for attention, you might want to take a second to think about what I've said. And if none of the above makes any difference to you, do at least take into consideration the following: Fuck you, you presumptuous, arrogant little prick.
Submitted by dategrape (user info) at 2004-08-04 11:44:37 EDT (#)
Ranking: -2
It is obvious this is a fucking story. You are already starting to cover your tracks. When it all comes out you are full of shit, you will say: "well at least I gave other people inspiration and the coping mechanism to deal with THEIR rape trauma."
http://www.ubersite.com/m/40314
"What all this means is that if a woman get raped, she is an extremely desirable female." I have seen your photo lojope, things don't add up.
Submitted by lojope (user info) at 2004-08-04 10:55:26 EDT (#)
Ranking: 0
I didn't write this for hits, fools.
I wrote it for theraputic reasons.
And for people like this:
Submitted by runninginplace (user info) at 2004-08-03 16:41:11 (#)
Ranking: 2
...I like to think and hope that writing these help you and others who read them. It gives me insight into a situation I have never experienced.
Submitted by Malificent (user info) at 2004-08-04 10:49:42 EDT (#)
Ranking: -2
Submitted by dategrape (user info) at 2004-08-04 06:51:45 (#)
Ranking: -2
If you were raped, you wouldn't be whoring it out to get cheap hits.
Submitted by lojope (user info) at 2004-08-04 09:29:00 EDT (#)
Ranking: 0
Submitted by shitfuck (user info) at 2004-08-04 03:33:28 (#)
Ranking: 2
I'm loving you until I quit breathing.
~*~*~*~
Love you too, dahling.
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