My subconscious is afraid of starving to death. (1342 hits)
Category: NoneRating: 1.36 on 29 reviews (Rate this item) (V)
Submitted by coley (View user info) at 2004-08-08 02:24:32 EDT
Howdy folks. It's been awhile, so what better to post about than strange dreams?
You know, those dreams that seem so real that you wake up with the emotions that you felt in your dream..and just can't shake 'em.
Anybody that knows me knows I talk a lot...some say I talk too much. Too much for what, I wonder? Perhaps too much for them to handle. I'm a bit crazy, and I often say the reason I talk so much is that there is so much going on in my head at any given time that if I don't verbalize my thoughts, my head might explode (or at least there's a chance of steam shooting out of my ears). Well, it appears as though those things floating around in my mind that I don't dispose of via speaking manifest themselves in the wee hours of the night.
I am one of very few people I have come in contact with who has vary vivid, detailed, incredibly odd dreams. I remember them quite well, and most of them have enough detail that if desired, they could be turned into a small movie (albeit a very strange one). I have chosed to chronicle one of my strangest dreams here, and if it is well received, (50/50 chance with this tough crowd) I shall post more in the future as my brain manufactures them.
~~~~~~~~~~
DOODEEDLLDOO>>>DOODEEDLLDOO...*cue wavy line dream sequence thingie*
~~~~~~~~~~
La de da, I'm dreaming..Not that I know it at the time.
I am suddenly back in high school..or college...I'm not sure which. In fact, I'm quite uneasy. I am in this huge building, and couldn't tell you where it is I'm supposed to be right now. Wait, it's math class..what level? I couldn't tell you. I couldn't tell you because I haven't been going.
Panic. Freak out a little.
Run around the halls trying to find my way.
Suddenly I think to myself, "Self? I'm quite hungry."
I then lament the fact that I have no food or money and no time to get something to eat.
Apparently I need to get to work, and haven't eaten or even showered yet.
"Ya know, Self, I really ought to pack some extra sandwiches and carry them in my bag just for times like these."
There's a good idea, premade food to be carried around for days. "just in case."
Well, sad that I have nothing to eat, I think to myself, "It's almost time to go to work! I better take a shower..oh shit, I don't have time to go home and shower.
I know! I'll shower here!"
Apparently my school has a co-ed shower.
I know what you're thinking, co-ed shower? Here comes the porn part!
Nope, sorry. Apparently my subconscious isn't very graphic (except for that time I had a dream that Frankie from the Real World was trying to seduce me..that's another story).
I enter the "shower room"...it's got stalls, like a bathroom, but with no doors. Each stall has a shower head and a bench and is forest green. I start to undress, and turn on the water, when I realize that I have no towel.
I decide that it would be perfectly reasonable to ask my neighbor to borrow a towel.
Instead of sticking my head around the corner and asking this naked man for a towel to borrow, I decide to stand on the bench and look down into his shower stall. He lent me a maroon towel, and the whole time I was talking to him I remember thinking "Don't stare at his junk. That's rude."
After an uneventful shower, I dry off, get dressed, and get my stuff together. Pick up my backpack and open it up to put my stuff away, and lo and behold! There, in my bag, are three peanut butter and jelly sandwiches in plastic baggies.
"Aha!" I says to myself. "This is fantastic! I don't remember putting these here, but I rejoice that my hunger shall not go unanswered!"
I take one sandwich out of the baggie, take a big bite of it, and realize that something isn't right. As soon as the bad flavor hits, I peel the bread apart. The strawberry jelly has turned bad..horribly terribly bad..moldy and sour and, well, "This jelly is fucking rancid!"
That was the last thing I remember thinking before I woke up.
I was running late to work, and after a quick shower (not co-ed) I opened the fridge. There, staring me in the face, was the strawberry jelly.
AH!! RANCID!
It wasn't rancid, really, but that was 2 months ago and I haven't eaten a peanut butter and jelly sandwich since.
*I made a really kickass MS Paint sandwich for this, and it wouldn't let me save it as anything but a bitmap. And it wouldn't let me save ANY jpegs or gifs as anything but a bitmap. So, My subconscious is afraid of starving, and my conscious hates my computer.
User Reviews
Submitted by coley (user info) at 2006-10-19 02:12:56 EDT (#)
Ranking: 1
weird
Submitted by Istaros (user info) at 2006-02-06 00:27:43 EST (#)
Ranking: 2
that's cool, crazy girls are more fun. and i wouldn't mind if she was my dentist. then again it's impossible to successfully flirt with a dentist/nurse/other medical provider when you're on novocaine and rooling.
Submitted by coley (user info) at 2006-02-05 22:03:37 EST (#)
Ranking: 0
By the way, Istaros, if your dentist has to lean over you I do not pity you for her having Karen Cliche's body.
I imagine it would distract you from some of the pain of drillings and fillings.
Submitted by coley (user info) at 2006-02-05 22:02:20 EST (#)
Ranking: 0
okay, now I re-read your original review, and ours to follow, and all I can say is that your dreams make about as much sense as mine (none)
and now I am off to google karen cliche (sp?)
Submitted by coley (user info) at 2006-02-05 22:00:53 EST (#)
Ranking: 0
I'm pretty sure I'm either crazy, or stupid.
Probably both. My apologies, Istaros......
*shoots self in head*
ouch
Submitted by Istaros (user info) at 2006-02-05 19:21:31 EST (#)
Ranking: 2
it wasn't a post, it was a reply in this thread where i mentioned that dream. a few comments down. i just also included a link to the one about being in the oasis in the same reply
Submitted by coley (user info) at 2006-02-05 16:17:19 EST (#)
Ranking: 0
Istaros, I remember reading your post about the shitting-out-of duodenums and such, but I can't seem to find it. Could you link it? Otherwise reading your comments without re-skimming the post makes my head spin.
:D
Submitted by Istaros (user info) at 2006-02-04 05:15:24 EST (#)
Ranking: 2
"Submitted by coley (user info) at 2006-01-30 22:34:48 (#)
Ranking: 2
I also read this post, but couldn't analyze it because I lost all concentration at "and then I jacked off".
How the FUCK do you shit out your duodenum? I am sorry I just pictured that. So even if it WERE normal to shit out your duodenum after getting your rectum stitched up, why did you have to have your rectum stitched up in the first place?
THIS IS FUCKED UP
And I don't even want to know who Karen Cliche is."
no no no...
1) somebody else, some old man, had shit out his duodenum. not me. i was just talking to the doctor, afterwards.
2) his ass got stitched up after losing the aforementioned organ, not before. this was to prevent bleeding or loss of bowel control, don't remember. frankly, doesn't matter, it's all pretty gross regardless.
3) indeed it is fucked up. this is among the most fucked up ones i've had. but all my dreams are weird, and they usually involve the human body going through some sort of change or procedure or victimization. the only other common denominator i can think of is a constant sense of imminence.
4) you don't want to know, but you WILL know(it's your destiny): Karen Cliche is an attractive-enough TV actress with cat-like eyes who i've only ever seen with black hair, yet she's actually blonde. it's an improvement if you ask me; i generally prefer darker hair in the first place, but her facial features don't seem as if they would complement blondeness regardless of how you felt about the color itself. why was she my dentist? don't know. 'she' was actually this girl i knew at the time, but the girl had Karen Cliche's body.
Submitted by coley (user info) at 2006-01-30 22:35:29 EST (#)
Ranking: 0
Submitted by Nockane (user info) at 2006-01-28 20:11:07 (#)
Ranking: 2
"Don't stare at his junk, that's rude."
At least your subconcious isn't gay, or it's extremely polite...
````````````
Actually I'm female.
So I guess I should have stared at his junk, just to make him feel like more of a man.
YEAH BABY
Submitted by Nockane (user info) at 2006-01-28 20:11:07 EST (#)
Ranking: 2
"Don't stare at his junk, that's rude."
At least your subconcious isn't gay, or it's extremely polite...
Submitted by Istaros (user info) at 2006-01-28 19:50:33 EST (#)
Ranking: 2
"very vivid, detailed, incredibly odd dreams"
me too. http://ubersite.com/m/45920
then again, one time i dreamed somebody had shit out his duodenum, and it was green and slimy in the toilet bowl, and a doctor told me it's really just an inconvenience once they stitch up what's left of your rectum and that losing the duodenum is actually a common side-effect of old age. or the one about a guy that was frozen and some teenagers put a slab of styrofoam or frost over him, and sprayed a hose through the slab in order to melt the frozen man. or the time i dreamt Karen Cliche was my dentist.
Submitted by coley (user info) at 2006-01-15 19:33:11 EST (#)
Ranking: 0
Chroniclysm
and you? what are your dreams about?
Submitted by Chroniclysm (user info) at 2006-01-14 23:09:17 EST (#)
Ranking: 2
Another excellent dream. Strange, but excellent.
Submitted by coley (user info) at 2006-01-13 11:07:22 EST (#)
Ranking: 0
James Marsters?
Who is that?
*google image search*.....
I'm sorry..you can have him. Not quite my type. (whatever that means)
Submitted by crazyaardvark (user info) at 2006-01-13 02:23:41 EST (#)
Ranking: 1
Why can't you just have normal dreams about licking chocolate off James Marsters?
Submitted by coley (user info) at 2006-01-13 02:18:27 EST (#)
Ranking: 0
click on this link and scroll down to the bottom picture to see the view from the top of the hill. Remove crowd, remove stage, replace crowd with water and stage with lion-topped building..
Incidentally (HAHAHA SCI GET IT INCIDENTALLY oh fuck I kill me) if you want to see what fun Oregon is in the summertime, do a google image search on horning's hideout or SCI horning's hideout.
Oh yes, fun had by all. The only place I break out my green and purple and gold tinsel feather boa and multicolored reflective tape.
To think I was sober.
Submitted by coley (user info) at 2006-01-13 02:06:24 EST (#)
Ranking: 0
Hey Chronic,
I didn't see this til just now.
you really want me to post another dream of mine? they are so disjointed, completely fucked up..but very detailed. Like a movie.
Here's one, anyhow.
About 2 weeks ago, I had a dream that myself and at least two good friends were staying in some sort of a cabin or vacation rental home. We were in the garage, which had an email address written on a piece of paper taped to the outside of the garage door. It was filled with all sorts of mail and papers (junk email? hmph) and we were trying to figure out what to do with it all.
Suddenly the garage door wasn't closed anymore, and I heard some noise that got my attention.
I turned and looked over my left shoulder and saw that we were on top of a hill. The hill was huge and at the bottom was a building, about ten stories high, in the water. I didn't know if it was a huge lake or the ocean or if the building was being covered by water like a tsunami..either way I knew the building wasn't usually partway under water.
The building was some sort of a zoo (odd, I know) and there was a large lion pacing back and forth on top of it. I guess the water must have been rising or something and it was panicking. There was a lot of commotion and splashing around in the water next to the building, on its right side, and there were creatures I couldn't identify at the distance I was at. I'm pretty sure most of them don't exist in this world (imaginary zoo creatures?) Suddenly the lion leapt from the top of the building down into the water..
I yelled to my friends that were in the email garage with me, "Holy shit! The lion just jumped in the water!" And they all came running to look. Suddenly there were a fair amount of people around me, and the setup of the sloping land down to the water reminded me of a place I've been (Horning's Hideout campground in North Plains, OR, except in my dream the building in the water was at the bottom of the bowl of land, not the outdoor sound stage that is there for things like the annual SCI festival).
Immediately after the lion jumped in, I saw a blonde kid, must have been nineteen or so, swimming and splashing away with panic right near it and all of the imaginary animals and such. The lion was like a shark, suddenly attacking the kid..he was trying so hard to swim away and splashing so much but the lion kept slashing him with his claws and biting him and he was killing him..and I could hear him scream so loud.
All around me were all these people, and nobody was doing anything..nobody COULD do anything..I think they were all fucked up and I was the only sober one. I turned my back, felt like I was betraying this kid, because I saw he needed help and was screaming so loud.. and all I could think was that he was going to die, and I hoped that whoever he was with, family or friends at this festival, didn't see this happen to him.
Fucked up, huh.
Submitted by Chroniclysm (user info) at 2006-01-11 00:53:07 EST (#)
Ranking: 2
Haha. Do this again.
Submitted by coley (user info) at 2004-08-11 22:18:37 EDT (#)
Ranking: 0
Hey Nugs,
I'd post more of my dreams for you to "analyze" (heheheheh I said "ANALyze")
but I don't think they go over as well in written form as they do when being discussed.
How about the fairly frequent dreams that I have where I can't get a retainer or braces to stay in my mouth (I have neither) and right when I think I got it, I bite down and there's crunchy pieces of broken tooth..and I spit them out in my hand and it's pieces of tourmaline..??
I was confused because losing teeth sucked, but tourmaline is nice and can fetch a good price.
WTF
Submitted by corn_nugget (user info) at 2004-08-11 01:50:22 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
Lucky for you, I am a professional Dream Analyzer.
your dream tells me one thing:
You're fucking weird.
(oh, and crazy... but I guess that would make for TWO things)
Submitted by coley (user info) at 2004-08-08 22:35:21 EDT (#)
Ranking: 0
Yes, Andrew, co-ed showers..I knew I could get your attention. :P
Chicken and bob, sorry I missed ya last night! I had to be up at 5 and posted this when I couldn't sleep.
I almost never drink, so it's weird that I have such strange dreams...the only drug I do is nicotine..
I won't post another one of these things unless it sounds interesting in the daytime.
:D
Submitted by LadyPlural (user info) at 2004-08-08 12:41:06 EDT (#)
Ranking: 1
You know, my father does this weird thing where he buys/cooks WAY too much food. It isn't unusual for us to have more left-overs than fiid that we ate. Perhaps this is a disturbing trend... He's subconsiously afraid of starving as well.
Submitted by Sofa_Queen (user info) at 2004-08-08 06:02:42 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
You ever go to sleep drunk, and while you're sleeping your body becomes dehydrated, and so to fix this your subconscious makes you have dreams where you drink and drink and drink but never feel less thirsty? me neither.
Submitted by Gnome (user info) at 2004-08-08 03:22:59 EDT (#)
Ranking: 0
No Comment
Submitted by hidden101 (user info) at 2004-08-08 03:14:43 EDT (#)
Ranking: 1
co-ed showers?
sexy...
Submitted by bob (user info) at 2004-08-08 03:12:18 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
oh that hurts coley.
im home.
get on yahoo if you are still camping this post at 3:11.
Submitted by GodChicken (user info) at 2004-08-08 02:53:08 EDT (#)
Ranking: 0
That... was some strange, rambling....stuff, Coley.
Check yahoo. I wanted to say hi.
Submitted by coley <notloggedin> at 2004-08-08 02:47:09 EDT (#)
Ranking: 0
Yeah, ya know, when I told people this story, it was all fascinating and stuff, and sparked some very interesting conversation about lucid dreams, the idea that people supposedly don't dream in color, etc.
And here on this white page, well, I admit it is just shit.
I should have put a picture of someone's boobies up just so nobody felt let down.
Submitted by ragazzo (user info) at 2004-08-08 02:42:24 EDT (#)
Ranking: 1
I had the feeling that you were going to post something more bizarre. I don't know if it is weird, because what is a weird dream anyway? What is an average dream anyway? Dreaming you were naked in school?
Don't you evere feel like you know you're dreaming and don't want to wake up because you really like the dream and then you feel like you're slowly waking up and don't know what to do?
Err... anyway:
+1.
Submitted by coley (user info) at 2004-08-08 02:24:50 EDT (#)
Ranking: -2
OMFG DI3!!q1!!@#k