Quit feeding them for the love of all that is holy. (1534 hits)
Category: NoneRating: 1.94 on 19 reviews (Rate this item) (V)
Submitted by Donne Fan (View user info) at 2004-08-12 01:36:55 EDT
I read a story today and it reminded me of a time period in my life when my little brother and I almost died. Due to a chain of events that were somewhat hilarious we had taken an 18 hour journey on the Greyhound bus line (my first and last) to Miami, Florida. The trip was marked by learning different reasons people had to go see their P.O. (one guy said, "my old lady stabbed me in the back by screwing my friend so I got arrested when I spray painted whore on the house" I asked why he got arrested for vandalizing his own house and he said, "well it was mainly when I she came out hollerin and I sprayed the paint in her eyes") and turning down an offer to be a tag team trucker that was repeated again and again as if the brilliant economics would make me drop out of college to do the long haul gig. Anyway upon reaching Miami I saw my alma mater get destroyed by Nebraska after having the 8 tickets I was planning to scalp stolen. Being in a great mood at that point, I made a bad situation worse by deciding not to get a hotel room. My brother and I left the greyhound station in Miami after the police showed up for the second time, and decided to wait until the morning out at the Miami airport.
The Miami airport had some decently sweet benches and was well lit so I settled down to what I thought would be a good nights sleep. Then I heard it..."Boys!" The word was then slowly repeated, "Booooooyyyyysssss! Can you help me?" "Please help me!" My brother and I had attempted to find a quiet spot in the airport and we found the most deserted spot where we put our bags and had just started to settle. We both decided to close our eyes again and pretend we could not hear her. She was insistent and we both felt guilty enough to respond about the same time. I do not know if it was my status as a boy scout at the time, or my tender conscience or the fact that my ears were exposed and I had no head phones to block out her voice and wanted to sleep badly, but I got up and approached her.
This woman was a large black woman who looked to be about 500 pounds. We looked around to see if anyone else could assist her who was either an adult or whose job it was to help, but seeing no one we approached. "Yes Maam?" "Boys thank goodness, I thought no one would come." "Can I help you?" "Could you boys help me outside?" "I'm sorry what do you need help with?" "I am trying to get outside and I cannot, I was just praying that someone would come to help me and you are the answer to my prayers."
I am not sure if this lady knew that would be the best button to push but suddenly she had my sympathy and full support. I was her angel of salvation! Then I moved in closer and she extended her flabby arms and I helped her to her feet. This required maximum effort by me, and my little brother who was 13 at the time, looked like he might die. I realized as the stench washed over me that it had hit him earlier because of his diminished height. This woman had soiled herself and apparently had been sitting in it for quite a while.
Now before you call me insensitive, I will say I did not push her down or say you are sick or even recoil and act somewhat distant. We both acted as if nothing was the matter and my brother gathered her things as she used me as a human cane and took a few steps towards the door. To explain the slowness of her movement let me explain that not only did each step create heavy breathing (her breath distracted me momentarily from the poop smell because I think there were masticated cornish hens hanging askew from her teeth) but that the automatic doors opened and closed 8 times in the time period where they sensed our presence but she needed to "ketch her breath fer a second." We finally made it outside and we left her in the company of a cab driver who I am thinking was pondering driving off because he did not have a forklift or an 18 wheeler. She hugged us both and thanked us for helping her. As we washed our hands and faces and basically bathed like homeless men in the bathroom sink to attempt to remove the stench, we made jokes and laughed. Looking back I am not bemused, I am angry.
If you get so fat that you are a burden to others, you disgust me. This is the story that brought back the repressed horror of that sickening night in Miami!
http://www.wftv.com/news/3643877/detail.html
600-Pound Woman Dies After Being Surgically Removed From Couch
POSTED: 3:48 pm EDT August 11, 2004
UPDATED: 10:09 pm EDT August 11, 2004
STUART, Fla. -- A dramatic rescue ended tragically in Stuart, Florida, a rescue so difficult firefighters say they have never seen anything like it.
It happened late Tuesday night and early Wednesday morning at the home of a 600-pound woman who was having trouble breathing. Rescuers went in not knowing how difficult it would be to get her out. 40-year-old Gail Grinds was literally stuck to her couch and had to be removed surgically at the hospital.
Authorities estimate she had been on the couch anywhere from two to five years.
Martin County Fire amd Rescue crews faced what seemed to be an impossible mission. Everyone going inside had to wear protective gear. The stench was so powerful they had to blast in fresh air.
They tried to cut out the front door, but at four-and-a-half feet wide, it wouldn't work. They had to cut plywood since a normal stretcher wouldn't do.
An ambulance was too small, so they brought in a trailer to get her out. While rescue crews came up with a back-door rescue plan, detectives secured what had become a crime scene, questioning family members about how it got so bad.
Using planks, they loaded the woman on to the trailer, still attached to the couch. Removing her would be too painful, since her body is grafted to the fabric. After years of staying put, her skin has literally become one with the sofa and it must be surgically removed.
Detectives are investigating whether they have a case of neglect, or if it is simply a very sad story.
Grinds was taken to the Martin Memorial hospital where doctors removed her from the couch, but she died in spite of all the attempts to save her life.
I feel bad she died, but geez...no one to blame but yourself. Wait a tick, also blame whatever horrible person brought food to the living tub of goo that set up on a sofa like Jabba the Hut. Her family should be ashamed. What sick sick bastards.
Here is a more positive note. Buffets all over South Dakota are optimistic and are adding jobs after seeing this story.
http://www.cnn.com/2004/US/Central/08/11/halfton.man.ap/index.html
Half-ton man drops 321 pounds, and still counting
Admitted to hospital weighing more than 1,000 pounds
Wednesday, August 11, 2004 Posted: 10:50 AM EDT (1450 GMT)
SIOUX FALLS, South Dakota (AP) -- A man who once weighed more than half a ton has lost 321 pounds under the care of a team of doctors and hopes to lose 450 pounds more.
Patrick Deuel, 42, of Valentine, Nebraska, weighed 1,072 pounds when he was admitted to Sioux Falls' Avera McKennan Hospital eight weeks ago. Deuel, who is just under 6 feet tall, is on a 1,200 calorie-a-day diet.
"If we hadn't gotten him here, he'd be dead now," said Fred Harris, Deuel's lead doctor.
The former restaurant manager has been bedridden since last fall. He has battled heart failure, thyroid problems, diabetes, pulmonary hypertension and arthritis, and needed help just to roll over in bed.
"Until recently, I wasn't able to see any light at the end of the tunnel," he said Monday from his hospital bed.
A group known as the League of Human Dignity helped arrange for Deuel to be driven to a local livestock scale, where he could be weighed.
According to the Guinness World Records Web site, the record for heaviest man in the world is 1,397 pounds, held by Jon Brower Minnoch of Bainbridge, Washington, who died in 1983.
Deuel, who has battled weight problems all his life and blames his condition in part on genetics, said it took months to find a hospital. Hospitals closer to his home balked at admitting him, he said.
"I got scared because I couldn't help him anymore, and I didn't know who would help him," said his wife, Edith.
Harris said Deuel's care could cost millions of dollars, much of which the hospital may have to cover. Officials found a special ambulance, and hospital workers joined two beds to accommodate Deuel.
One of Deuel's goals is to walk out of the hospital. He also wants to go to a Nebraska Cornhuskers football game, and just take a walk with his wife.
"Even though he's faced negativity all these years, he's not a negative person," Edith Deuel said. "He's almost always been able to stay bubbly and make jokes and be happy."
The greatest thing about this story is where it says this," A group known as the League of Human Dignity helped arrange for Deuel to be driven to a local livestock scale, where he could be weighed." The League of Human Dignity I am also guessing holds life affirming events like searching for the toenails that most resemble the inside of a butterfinger bar and providing an award to the anorexic who most looks like a sudanese war orphan. Disgusting.
Even that bit of good news must be tempered by the news that stomach stapling surgery can have complications and be fatal. So if you do not want to risk horrible health problems, try never taking in 5000 calories a day in the first place and saying no to your gluttonous desire to drown your sorrow in ice cream and pork rinds.
http://www.cnn.com/2004/HEALTH/08/11/stomach.stapling.ap/index.html
User Reviews
Submitted by smokymtcsw (user info) at 2004-08-12 12:54:21 EDT (#)
Ranking: 0
Josie, I am in Nashville, trying to plan my return, I need to check again on the concert. I know we will go to some when I am back but I am not sure yet. I will get on it and email back.
Submitted by Gnome (user info) at 2004-08-12 10:57:06 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
disgusting
Submitted by Kristen (user info) at 2004-08-12 09:27:22 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
That is so sad.
Submitted by Caulaincourt (user info) at 2004-08-12 09:24:41 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
No Comment
Submitted by AlwaysAnEagle (user info) at 2004-08-12 09:19:34 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
Yaaaay Smoky!
And yaaaaaay Manny!
(Did you get my email? Fighting Gravity?)
Submitted by wookie (user info) at 2004-08-12 08:36:46 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
Oh, dear...
Submitted by loki (user info) at 2004-08-12 07:35:44 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
I saw that woman on the news last night. It gave me nightmares and then the story in the paper about the "half ton man" ruined my breakfast. How does something like this happen? I'm going to go running now.
Submitted by I_Have_a_Kristen_Fetish (user info) at 2004-08-12 07:05:37 EDT (#)
Ranking: 1
No Comment
Submitted by Just_me_and_the_cats (user info) at 2004-08-12 06:06:01 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
I just posted this same item (couch lady)... after you did. Oops. Anyhow, it's still disgusting no matter how many times I read it. Plus two for the related stories. Jesus. You would think that not being able to get up off your massive ass just for a piss would start setting off a few alarms.
Submitted by krootons (user info) at 2004-08-12 05:46:42 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
A group known as the League of Human Dignity helped arrange for Deuel to be driven to a local livestock scale, where he could be weighed.
Submitted by punchdrunk (user info) at 2004-08-12 05:00:08 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
No Comment
Submitted by Quasiplasmohedron (user info) at 2004-08-12 04:36:05 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
Sad....
Submitted by shitfuck (user info) at 2004-08-12 04:04:36 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
I WASH MYSELF WITH A RAG ON A STICK
Submitted by Banga3386 (user info) at 2004-08-12 03:59:06 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
good sweet jeebus crisp, i wish i hadn't just gobbled down 6 jack in a box tacos before reading that. I fear they may want to make a haste escape now. I should send this to my relatives who are at max 40lbs overweight to make them shut up.
Fuck dude, this goes with the over population problem: Just stop FUCKING!
Submitted by Chroniclysm (user info) at 2004-08-12 02:12:12 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
I read that story earlier.
...
I wish I could sit on my couch for 2 years and eat potato chips.
Submitted by Scott_James (user info) at 2004-08-12 02:02:56 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
No Comment
Submitted by Socky (user info) at 2004-08-12 02:02:31 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
Something in me automatically wants to say "No fat chicks." Call me a bastard, call me what you will.
Sometimes people just can't help themselves. I always thought 230 lbs to a 6 foot person was absurd. 1000? Jeepers.
Submitted by smokymtcsw (user info) at 2004-08-12 01:57:06 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
How could I forget the most important thing! Go see Napoleon Dynamite. It is the best movie ever.
Submitted by smokymtcsw (user info) at 2004-08-12 01:42:04 EDT (#)
Ranking: 0
OH MY SWEET LORD. On the other side of the equation, Britney Murphy is on Carson Daly right now and she is disgusting. Anorexia is also a problem. Britney eat a freaking sandwich, you are making me feel ill.