My car sucks, but the road test examiners suck more (311 hits)
Category: GeneralRating: 0.4 on 5 reviews (Rate this item) (V)
Submitted by Cypher (View user info) at 2004-08-17 02:00:44 EDT
I was discriminated against. Because my car is too freakin big. Absolutely nobody believes me when they say my car's too big to parallel park in a spot an acceptable size for perhaps a Geo Tracker. Instead, they tell me of this thing called "practice"... bullshit, I say. I took my driver's test a few weeks ago. I finished the road part of the test ok, but trouble hit me and my 1992 Camaro when it was time for the 90 degree backing.
Examiner: Now back between the flags.
Me (looking back and seeing one flag): Uh... between the flags?
Examiner: Between the flags.
Me: Uh....
I crane my neck to see beyond the absence of a back seat window and through the view-disfiguring rear window and see a glimpse of another orange flag. I carelessly reversed the car, tried and back it in, missed entirely. I plainly saw that the flags were too damn close together to even fit my car between, less perfectly back into it, but chose not to say anything, probably for fear of what that bitch would tell me. In any case, I know for sure that it wasn't ten feet across, which it was supposed to be. In my second attempt to back it in, I hit a flag and the coffee can base of it scraped across the ground. "screw it," I thought. I stopped and shifted into park and let the examiner scribble on her sheet of paper.
Luck was not on my side when I did the parallel parking portion of the test, either. I did actually manage to do it, though I was too far away from the curb and too close to the flag in front. I didn't know at the time that I had already failed the test for hitting that first flag in the 90 degree backing. I also didn't know that the actual parking was not the only part of that portion - I had to get out, too. I am such a ditz sometimes. Anyway, I didn't back up enough, and on my attempt to pull out, hit the outside flag. By now, the "I-am-driving-a-Chevy-small-block-on-four-wheels-and-this-flag-shall-surely-not-be-the-boss-of-me" thing had gotten to my head, and I tried to actually run the flag straight over. I stepped on the gas, but managed to do no more than push that flag a few yards down the road -it swinging back and hitting the front of the car several times in there - before the examiner screeched "IN A SAFE MANNER!" and I grudgingly backed up and re-exited in a "safe manner". I know hitting that flag stood for hitting a car, but it's not like I actually hit a car. If it was a car, I wouldn't have hit it, if that's not too hard to understand. Like I'd actually park my oil-burning beast like that in real life, anyway.
Of course, the only person I know who has a Geo Metro wrecked it, and my cousin and her Volkswagen Beetle are out of town, not to mention that she actually LIKES that car.... So I have my mom's van (which is a no, not that I have to say why), my dad's pickup (well, at least I could SEE from up there...), my grandma's buick, and my brother's cavaliers, which would be okay if i stood a chance in a manual. Why is everyone against me? Oh yeah, because I write crap like this.
User Reviews
Submitted by alu (user info) at 2004-08-17 04:30:50 EDT (#)
Ranking: 0
It sounds like you're just a bad driver. Don't make excuses, a '92 Camaro is not a big car. I did the driving test in my mom's '94 Grand Voyager which is probably 10" longer and I had no problems. At least you realize you need more experience, but please don't park by my car.
Submitted by Spuds002 (user info) at 2004-08-17 03:33:51 EDT (#)
Ranking: 0
please don't ever join the rest of us on the public roads. its people like you who leave big dents in my car in parking lots. and then just take off. i fucking hate that.
Submitted by Hadooken (user info) at 2004-08-17 02:27:35 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
just steal a car.
Submitted by Auf-Der-Maur (user info) at 2004-08-17 02:26:19 EDT (#)
Ranking: -2
d=-( You could ahve atleast lied to make it interesting.
Submitted by technu (user info) at 2004-08-17 02:10:39 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
haha
my drivers ed teacher was a ex con who had a mullet and told us about acid.
its was great