Democrats & Republicans: A history even "freebie" can understand (694 hits)
Category: NoneRating: -1.05 on 18 reviews (Rate this item) (V)
Submitted by Brian Johns (View user info) at 2004-08-18 12:26:35 EDT
I just had to take exception to this: http://www.ubersite.com/m/42105
I'm neither a Democrat nor a Republican, but I don't care for anyone who is so blinded by idealism that they refuse to look at historical facts or the external effects of their actions.
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Day 1 - Two groups of people, We'll call them the Dems and Reps, are given equal amounts of resources in a land full of opportunities. The Reps, however are not happy with their resources, so they head over to the adjacent land occupied by a group we'll call the Natives. They slaughter most of the Natives, put the survivors in concentration camps called reserves and steal their resources. Oh yeah and they introduce drugs and alcohol to their youth. Meanwhile, the Dems share their resources with the displaced Natives. The Reps call them bleeding hearts.
Day 2 - The Reps fell trees for shelter and warmth. Fields for crops are prepared. Nuts and berries are gathered from the wild to feed themselves. But this turns out to be hard work, so they import forced labor from Africa, who we will call the Slaves. When slavery is finally outlawed due to pressure from the Dems, the Dems create social programs to help the former slaves. The Reps call them weak.
Day 3 - The Reps have built roads, shelters and a school. The fields are planted and children are raised in homes with a man and woman providing for their care. However some Rep families have floods in their fields and do not have enough food. Rather then help them out, the Reps laugh at these families, call them weak and send them to live with the Dems. The Dems have come along as well, but are on the whole a little worse off as they have to take care of the Reps that couldn't quite cut it in the harsh dog-eat-dog world of the Reps. The Reps also kick out anybody who doesn't believe in their God and conform to their version of "morality" (which is to do what the Good Book says, unless you can afford to do otherwise).
Day 4 - The Reps enjoy a modest standard of living, having worked hard, planned ahead, used their military might to suppress the Natives and used resources without any concern for the environment. The children learn to plan for a future of better roads, food production and the application
of force on far away countries with lots of oil reserves. The Dems now stand at the border, pissed off at the amount of air pollution drifting over to their side and the Rep created ground water contamination that is affecting their drinking water. The Reps call them enviro-nazis.
Day 5 - The Dems, at the border, say "You have to stop imposing regimes on third world countries that have resources you want or that are strategically important to your world military plans. Aside from the fact that the international community is not happy with us Dems due to our proximity to you, you are also inadvertantly causing the deaths of children left homeless from your bombs." The Reps, not feeling sorry for their neighbors, call them lazy socialists.
Day 6 - Soon, many members of the Rep army, returning from flattening an oil producing nation, find themselves unemployed. The Reps have kicked the crap out of so many other governments and there is no one left to fight. So not only are the soldiers unemployed, but the weapons factories are shut down. Plus, no one in the international community wants to trade with the Reps, because they use unilateral force to get their way. The high unemployment leads to crime. The Dems meanwhile are doing OK. Sure their taxes are higher because of government organized redistribution of wealth and a national healthcare plan, but the lower poverty levels have reduced crime and made the Dems-land a nicer place to live.
Day 7 - More and more Reps come to live with the Dems. This migration has hurt business in the Rep land, so the Rep leaders propose that they live together in one big happy country, combining Rep innovation with Dem compassion. They call it compassionate conservatism. There is a big vote to decide and it is close, but the Reps say they one so we have a new country.
Day 8 - The Reps, who got to run the new country, wreck everything. They say they believe in free trade, then impose tariffs on incoming goods from countries with more efficient means of production. Wanting to support their failing military goods industry, they start another war. But because no countries want to fight them, they create an imaginary enemy call "Terrorism". The public buys it and the war costs a lot of money and causes a massive deficit. Rather than raise taxes to pay for the war effort, the Reps cut social programs. Soon the combined Rep-Dem land looks a lot like the old Rep land. Crime increases and those who can't compete are called lazy. Weather patterns become increasingly erratic due to the burning of fossil fuels.
Day 9 - People start to realize that the Reps are nothing more than a bunch of idiots who scream "Big government doesn't work" and then get elected and prove that statement.
To be continued on November 2nd.....
User Reviews
Submitted by domenad (user info) at 2004-08-18 14:12:30 EDT (#)
Ranking: -2
Typical democrat - not an original thought to be found for miles.
Submitted by disAbled (user info) at 2004-08-18 14:07:32 EDT (#)
Ranking: -1
This is mostly drivel. You make a few points, but drown them in your steaming rhetoric. Remember this?
"I don't care for anyone who is so blinded by idealism..."
Yeah...that applies to your own post. Idealism isn't just applied to positive images. Your critique of "Rep" policy is very clouded by negative idealism. Breaking down political criticism to republican and democrat is pretty stupid. Both parties have changed drastically over time, and both have had their big problems.
"...that they refuse to look at historical facts or the external effects of their actions"
Some historical facts. Andrew Jackson was the first president to openly support removal of Indians from the eastern regions of the US. His legacy is a tragic little event known as "The Trail of Tears." Andrew Jackson was a Democrat. Harry S. Truman was the only nation leader in the history of the world to autorize use of nuclear war. Truman was a Democrat. John F. Kennedy initialized the Vietnam conflict in which over 50,000 US soldiers were killed. The United States failed in it's Vietnam objectives. Kennedy was a Democrat.
In conclusion. This post is juvenile and self-defeating. AKA drivel.
Submitted by IsawBoobs (user info) at 2004-08-18 13:33:16 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
freebie is a perfect example of our government. Stupid, uninformed, brash, and immature.
Submitted by Brian_Johns (user info) at 2004-08-18 13:28:36 EDT (#)
Ranking: 0
I agree with the guy who said that people shouldn't write political posts because of a lack of knowledge. That was part of my motivation for taking a shot at the last guys post. I don't profess to be a historian or an economist by any means. In fact, I'm not really an expert on anything, except self-depreciating humor. But what bugged me about freebie's post was the whole part about two groups starting off with equal amounts of resources.
No, I don't blame the Republicans for slavery or the cultural genocide of Native Americans. I just blame their typical mindset. The fact is, Americans regardless of their political stripes are historically responsible. But the Republicans of today are typically the type of people who can't get their heads around the problem. The same mindset exits today with the anti-gay marriage movement. They are denying people civil rights and it is no different than deny blacks the vote. Or women.
As for the environmental side, all of you wannabe economists should look into the concept of externalities. These are costs that don't show up in models because they are not readily measurable. For example, the guy driving an SUV today contributes to environmental damages, that will need to be cleaned up in the future. That's why taxes on heavy emmission vehicles makes sense. It matches the cost with the revenue.
For those that care, while I am politically neutral, I tend to fall in the capitalist fan club on the fiscal side. I do believe in the power of free markets, with the caveat that they work better when regulated. However on the social side I am as liberal as they get. I don't believe in God and don't think religion should be forced down our kids throats. I could care less in two men or two women want to marry. It's none of my fucking business. And the war on drugs is the stupidest thing ever (well 2nd stupidest according to my girlfriend the other day when I forgot to pick her up after work). The so-called war just creates more crime and death than drugs do in the first place.
My biggest problem with Republicans is the fact that they tend to fuck up the economy. Their policy decisions are typically geared towards supporting the oil, aerospace and military industries. They cut taxes, which is great, except that they increase spending and drive the county into deficit. Not that the Democrats are saints, but they have historically done a better job.
Anyway, enough politics for me. I'm going back to self-depreciating humor, where few can challenge my expertise (on the humour maybe, but not self-depreciation).
Submitted by freebie (user info) at 2004-08-18 13:27:33 EDT (#)
Ranking: -2
Oh yeah, forgot to add the other usual lib comebacks:
Fuck off
Blow me
And my personal favorite- You suck
Submitted by SAECULUM.AUREUM (user info) at 2004-08-18 13:19:07 EDT (#)
Ranking: -2
Not good...not very good at all...nothing but dribble
Submitted by IsawBoobs (user info) at 2004-08-18 13:06:02 EDT (#)
Ranking: 0
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haha. LEGALIZE MARIJUANA!
hell, alcohol is legal and it's done way more damage to me than marijuana ever could. so why isn't marijuana legal? what is the government so afraid of.... people growing it in their basement for very low cost, but making a huge profit? nah, that can't be it. no one does that with tobacco. so what's the problem? we know it has medicinal purposes and it sure does work better than this shit i'm taking right now that won't let me yank one off. i really wonder why this country makes pot smokers into criminals...
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the answer is really simple actually. the more unhapy people are the more money tehy spend trying to become happy, getting wasted though its really fun it doesnt contribute to you being any happer, infact its the opposite. Smoking marijuna makes you content and people being content is bad for the economy and the government. When people are happy they are less inclined to beleive all the bullshit propoganda we see in the media every second of every day.
what could be a bigger crime than not supporting your evil economy and corrupt government?
Submitted by Degreeless_Capibara (user info) at 2004-08-18 13:04:38 EDT (#)
Ranking: -1
Again, I can't -2 it nor can I give it any higher. Same rating as the other.
Submitted by Stabkill (user info) at 2004-08-18 13:04:37 EDT (#)
Ranking: -2
Garbage... Total trash not based in truth.
This is a perfect example why people should not post political ramblings: THEY DON'T KNOW THEIR HEAD FROM THEIR ASS ABOUT POLITICS.
Submitted by freebie (user info) at 2004-08-18 13:03:41 EDT (#)
Ranking: -2
Get your own material asshole.
Submitted by Thanatos (user info) at 2004-08-18 13:03:35 EDT (#)
Ranking: -2
Meh. The first one was at least funny. You also forgot to make it even slightly factual.
Submitted by hidden101 (user info) at 2004-08-18 13:01:12 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
Submitted by IsawBoobs (user info) at 2004-08-18 12:53:08 (#)
Ranking: 2
+4 because some moron minus two's you.
i think you forgot day 7.5 so ill fill it in
day 7.5 : the reps realize that they are turning everything into shit. But they resolve not to let it stop them, so they create a media system which harnesses peoples fear to keep them trapped in false realities where they beleive their country is the best place in the world and marijuana is a horrible drug that should be destroyed and anyone who uses it should be put it jail for wanting to be happy and free. The dems end up in reps jails for wanting to be happy and free, and spreading the truth.
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haha. LEGALIZE MARIJUANA!
hell, alcohol is legal and it's done way more damage to me than marijuana ever could. so why isn't marijuana legal? what is the government so afraid of.... people growing it in their basement for very low cost, but making a huge profit? nah, that can't be it. no one does that with tobacco. so what's the problem? we know it has medicinal purposes and it sure does work better than this shit i'm taking right now that won't let me yank one off. i really wonder why this country makes pot smokers into criminals...
Submitted by BLITZKREIG_BOB (user info) at 2004-08-18 12:54:34 EDT (#)
Ranking: -2
This is as wrong as two boys fucking in the woods.
Submitted by IsawBoobs (user info) at 2004-08-18 12:53:08 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
+4 because some moron minus two's you.
i think you forgot day 7.5 so ill fill it in
day 7.5 : the reps realize that they are turning everything into shit. But they resolve not to let it stop them, so they create a media system which harnesses peoples fear to keep them trapped in false realities where they beleive their country is the best place in the world and marijuana is a horrible drug that should be destroyed and anyone who uses it should be put it jail for wanting to be happy and free. The dems end up in reps jails for wanting to be happy and free, and spreading the truth.
Submitted by runninginplace (user info) at 2004-08-18 12:48:46 EDT (#)
Ranking: -2
Damn you really screwed that up didn't you. It could have been good.
particular problems:
Native American part, wrong
Slave part, wrong
you forgot the part where the Dem's social welfare and redistribution of weatlth lead to intergeneration welfare, lack of work incentives, and destroys economic growth.
your criticism of tariffs since it is the Dem's that want to give companies subisidies to keep jobs in America. That would get challenged in the world court and we would lose.
you forgot to make it funny
Submitted by hidden101 (user info) at 2004-08-18 12:37:50 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
much better than that other crap post.
Submitted by cigar (user info) at 2004-08-18 12:35:39 EDT (#)
Ranking: -2
fucking idiot.
Submitted by Teephphah (user info) at 2004-08-18 12:35:20 EDT (#)
Ranking: 1
I applaud your attempt, and the ending was good. There are only a few pesky historical facts that screw up the beginning . . . things like the fact that there were no Republicans when we took this place from the Natives, and the fact that the Republican party was the one that was initially against Slavery.
Other than that, and what I perceive as a basic lack of understanding of economics, this was derivative of freebie's post, but still good.