5 good posts in 5 hours... (807 hits)
Category: NoneRating: 0.76 on 19 reviews (Rate this item) (V)
Submitted by disAbled (View user info) at 2004-08-25 19:38:35 EDT
I am getting very sick of the vast volume of completely shit filled posts that are polluting Ubersite. Since when is SPT every fucking day of the week? Today I go to the front page, and I am greeted with this. (I will only post the first 18 of the front page for the sake of space)
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Original Submissions
Meet the Parents! (CRAZY!!) (Rating: 2 on 2 reviews, last by bubba69 12 minutes ago)
Submitted by <creativeeyes99.at.lycos.com> (View user info) at 2004-08-25 18:04:29
Cameron Diaz caught fucking on a beach. (Rating: 1.12 on 10 reviews, last by B-Nizzo 1 minute ago)
Submitted by http://www.zen33652.zen.co.uk/ (View user info) at 2004-08-25 18:02:52
Mormons: Who needs 'em? (Rating: 0.4 on 6 reviews, last by Inseminator 1 minute ago)
Submitted by B.L. Hollyfield <idiot347.at.hotmail.com> (View user info) at 2004-08-25 17:59:03
Ubersite Art Contest! Fabulous Prizes! Inquire Within (Rating: -1 on 1 review, last by youarsoghey 20 minutes ago)
Submitted by The Other Matt Maiorano (View user info) at 2004-08-25 17:51:17
Fetish Explores His Sexuality and Scores! (Rating: -2 on 2 reviews, last by tuesdaydelay 14 minutes ago)
Submitted by Lojo and Fetish sitting in a tree... (View user info) at 2004-08-25 17:50:07
Torn ballsack, hott nurses, menstrual pads.... (Rating: 1.86 on 7 reviews, last by The_Walrus 11 minutes ago)
Submitted by B. Badger <byorn_bandit.at.hotmail.com> (View user info) at 2004-08-25 17:38:08
Of Where My Solace Lies (no reviews)
Submitted by JTC<cleric.at.thecorner.o-f.com> (View user info) at 2004-08-25 17:35:08
DMB is a crappy band....literally (Rating: 1.8 on 5 reviews, last by BLITZKREIG_BOB 0 minutes ago)
Submitted by Zandy1123 (View user info) at 2004-08-25 17:30:01
A Broken Home Is No Exuse!!!!!!! (Rating: 0 on 7 reviews, last by l-ryd 7 minutes ago)
Submitted by <lesryder27.at.hotmail.com> (View user info) at 2004-08-25 17:12:18
Picture Of My Huge Manly Balls (Rating: -0.71 on 8 reviews, last by The_Walrus 9 minutes ago)
Submitted by Lojo and Fetish sitting in a tree... (View user info) at 2004-08-25 17:06:54
[Older Messages]
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Given the general shittiness of these posts, I find myself extemely wary to click on a link. Two consierations motivate this.
1. NSFW is rarely posted on something that could get my ass fired
2. I'd rather not waste my time browsing into something that a twisted 8 year old could write.
Hence, after a cursory scan, I reduce the posts to those which I would bother to even open and look at. Worthiness is rated based on the title, the current rating, number of reviews, and who wrote the damn thing.
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REDUCED LIST
Original Submissions
Meet the Parents! (CRAZY!!) (Rating: 2 on 2 reviews, last by bubba69 12 minutes ago)
Submitted by <creativeeyes99.at.lycos.com> (View user info) at 2004-08-25 18:04:29
Torn ballsack, hott nurses, menstrual pads.... (Rating: 1.86 on 7 reviews, last by The_Walrus 11 minutes ago)
Submitted by B. Badger <byorn_bandit.at.hotmail.com> (View user info) at 2004-08-25 17:38:08
Of Where My Solace Lies (no reviews)
Submitted by JTC<cleric.at.thecorner.o-f.com> (View user info) at 2004-08-25 17:35:08
DMB is a crappy band....literally (Rating: 1.8 on 5 reviews, last by BLITZKREIG_BOB 0 minutes ago)
Submitted by Zandy1123 (View user info) at 2004-08-25 17:30:01
Kerry, Bush and Vietnam (Rating: 0.36 on 31 reviews, last by The_Walrus 4 minutes ago)
Submitted by acrog (View user info) at 2004-08-25 17:04:09
Government Engineering, revisited (Rating: 1.6 on 5 reviews, last by Zandy1123 47 minutes ago)
Submitted by <rurumon> (View user info) at 2004-08-25 16:54:03
Back to School - A Tale of Revenge (Rating: 2 on 18 reviews, last by dolfin 27 minutes ago)
Submitted by Michael Miracle <thieverymike.at.yahoo.com> (View user info) at 2004-08-25 16:01:46
The road less traveled. (Rating: 2 on 1 review, last by munkeypants 2 hours ago)
Submitted by DarthFaded (View user info) at 2004-08-25 15:52:18
The Midas Touch - Turning Shitty Posts To Gold (Rating: 1.5 on 28 reviews, last by AshK 78 minutes ago)
Submitted by NerfHerder <NerfHerder.at.comic.com> (View user info) at 2004-08-25 15:31:51
Hour of Despair (Rating: 2 on 12 reviews, last by NetProphet 2 hours ago)
Submitted by prophet (View user info) at 2004-08-25 15:21:59
Everything He's Not (Rating: 1.56 on 19 reviews, last by bubba69 20 minutes ago)
Submitted by Badlands (View user info) at 2004-08-25 15:20:07
Sorry, Wrong Stall (Rating: 2 on 24 reviews, last by DonkeyOnTheEdge 2 minutes ago)
Submitted by BLITZKREIG_BOB (View user info) at 2004-08-25 14:19:34
My theory on The Scream heist (Rating: 1.73 on 25 reviews, last by LadyPlural 17 minutes ago)
Submitted by loki (View user info) at 2004-08-25 14:12:34
The end of the internet (Rating: 0.75 on 5 reviews, last by RamJetMax 1 hour ago)
Submitted by <cadchick.at.hotmail.com> (View user info) at 2004-08-25 14:02:05
Hey NetProphet... (Rating: 1.23 on 96 reviews, last by FilthyAssistant 1 minute ago)
Submitted by Razor <Jeremy_21117.at.hotmail.com> (View user info) at 2004-08-25 13:51:18
Bong rips and driving... (Rating: -1.6 on 11 reviews, last by RamJetMax 1 hour ago)
Submitted by Mike <mikep696.at.hotmail.com> (View user info) at 2004-08-25 13:42:15
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After deciding to check out these posts, I generally decided if I am going to read each one in five seconds after the page comes up. The following should be closed immediately:
1. Posts with less than 10 lines followed by a picture UNLESS the title advertises it as a MS paint picture that was NOT created by KoolMang, Habeeb, Fetish, JesusChrist, or any other similar useless user.
2. Posts which were copied and pasted from another media source
3. Easily identifiable shenannigans
4. Obvious plagiarism
5. Anything where a 3 is used to replace an E, and is meant to be taken seriously. Also, anything with a webreviation (LOL, ROFL, FUCKYOU)
6. Any post that calls out a certan group of people (Canadians, Americans, Brits, Democrats, etc.)
7. Political posts draped in ridiculous rhetoric and stupid accusations
8. Heavy handed, cliche, and predictable emotional fiction. This includes themes of whiny suicide, self inflicted injury motivated by self pity, and murder motivated by authority-complex driven 'insanity' posts.
Using this criterion, I further reduce my list of acceptable posts.
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REDUCED LIST II
Meet the Parents! (CRAZY!!) (Rating: 2 on 2 reviews, last by bubba69 12 minutes ago)
Submitted by <creativeeyes99.at.lycos.com> (View user info) at 2004-08-25 18:04:29
Torn ballsack, hott nurses, menstrual pads.... (Rating: 1.86 on 7 reviews, last by The_Walrus 11 minutes ago)
Submitted by B. Badger <byorn_bandit.at.hotmail.com> (View user info) at 2004-08-25 17:38:08
Of Where My Solace Lies (no reviews)
Submitted by JTC<cleric.at.thecorner.o-f.com> (View user info) at 2004-08-25 17:35:08
Government Engineering, revisited (Rating: 1.6 on 5 reviews, last by Zandy1123 47 minutes ago)
Submitted by <rurumon> (View user info) at 2004-08-25 16:54:03
Back to School - A Tale of Revenge (Rating: 2 on 18 reviews, last by dolfin 27 minutes ago)
Submitted by Michael Miracle <thieverymike.at.yahoo.com> (View user info) at 2004-08-25 16:01:46
The Midas Touch - Turning Shitty Posts To Gold (Rating: 1.5 on 28 reviews, last by AshK 78 minutes ago)
Submitted by NerfHerder <NerfHerder.at.comic.com> (View user info) at 2004-08-25 15:31:51
Sorry, Wrong Stall (Rating: 2 on 24 reviews, last by DonkeyOnTheEdge 2 minutes ago)
Submitted by BLITZKREIG_BOB (View user info) at 2004-08-25 14:19:34
My theory on The Scream heist (Rating: 1.73 on 25 reviews, last by LadyPlural 17 minutes ago)
Submitted by loki (View user info) at 2004-08-25 14:12:34
The end of the internet (Rating: 0.75 on 5 reviews, last by RamJetMax 1 hour ago)
Submitted by <cadchick.at.hotmail.com> (View user info) at 2004-08-25 14:02:05
Hey NetProphet... (Rating: 1.23 on 96 reviews, last by FilthyAssistant 1 minute ago)
Submitted by Razor <Jeremy_21117.at.hotmail.com> (View user info) at 2004-08-25 13:51:18
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Now, when I take the time to read a post, I generally take the time to rate it. I feel that an author that has taken the time to make something worth reading deserves to be told how I feel about his piece. I originally thought that was the point of Ubersite in the first place. Obviously, however, my initial supsicions were wrong. Ubersite is about posting something like "All Jews should be anal raped and hung." by Habeeb Fetish. Oooh, I got everybody mad and pulled in 300 hits. Whee!
I find that there are still some good posts out there. Some are even damn good. For these posts, I continue to peruse the contents of Uber. I reduce my previous list to include those posts that prove to be worth reading as my initial reaction predicted
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EXTREMELY REDUCED LIST
REDUCED LIST II
Government Engineering, revisited (Rating: 1.6 on 5 reviews, last by Zandy1123 47 minutes ago)
Submitted by <rurumon> (View user info) at 2004-08-25 16:54:03
Back to School - A Tale of Revenge (Rating: 2 on 18 reviews, last by dolfin 27 minutes ago)
Submitted by Michael Miracle <thieverymike.at.yahoo.com> (View user info) at 2004-08-25 16:01:46
Sorry, Wrong Stall (Rating: 2 on 24 reviews, last by DonkeyOnTheEdge 2 minutes ago)
Submitted by BLITZKREIG_BOB (View user info) at 2004-08-25 14:19:34
My theory on The Scream heist (Rating: 1.73 on 25 reviews, last by LadyPlural 17 minutes ago)
Submitted by loki (View user info) at 2004-08-25 14:12:34
Hey NetProphet... (Rating: 1.23 on 96 reviews, last by FilthyAssistant 1 minute ago)
Submitted by Razor <Jeremy_21117.at.hotmail.com> (View user info) at 2004-08-25 13:51:18
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So, to the remaining five authors, I say, "Thank you." Thanks for providing me with something worthwile to read. Thanks for not wasting my life paging through endless inane and/or distasteful internet floatsum.
5 worthwhile posts in about 5 hours. This is what Uber has come to. It really isn't that hard to post something interesting. Perhaps if you just think about a topic for a while and iron out it's complexities. Write something original. That isn't hard either. Take one of the thousands of concepts pouring through your head each day and ask your self, "Has this been written about before on Uber?" If yes, try a different one. If not, maybe try writing about it. I can abide mediocre writing if it regards a somewhat interesting concept.
There are thousands of internet forums out there filled with babbling idiots. I was initially attracted to Uber because it seemed to have content. I recently surveyed a forum called WriteWords.com. It really had good content, but required payment to use. Uber doesn't ask for money, and, as far as I know, Bart doesn't want that. He wants a landscape of creativity and diversity unraped by censorship and unpillaged by the intellectually empty.
Please stop making Uber mediocre internet drivel. If viewers wanted that, they would go to ModernCoolTechTeenTalkForRealPlayers.com. This could be the coolest place on the web. Sadly, a place can only be a smidgin cooler than the people who frequent it.
[Bracing for -2 train]
User Reviews
Submitted by loki (user info) at 2004-08-26 10:46:48 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
I can't handle this kind of pressure.
Submitted by Smurfs (user info) at 2004-08-25 23:13:36 EDT (#)
Ranking: 0
http://www.ubersite.com/m/42927
here, I posted this for you...
Submitted by electrictoothsyndrome (user info) at 2004-08-25 23:09:09 EDT (#)
Ranking: 0
Submitted by I_Have_a_Kristen_Fetish_ (user info) at 2004-08-25 19:52:40 (#)
Ranking: 2
http://www.ubersite.com/m/42889
You can't say there were 5 good ones based on rankings because you have people like me out there who -2 the shit out of good posts.
Fuck you!
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GREAT POINT FETISH!
diabled: I do this too. Have to have some criteria. I don't tend to use ratings much, only as a confirmation of my initial reaction. I look for users and titles that catch my eye. I look for most recently reviewed. I look at old posts from users I really like...
IMHO, Razor's post doesn't belong in the final 5 here. It was about the same as a shit post except it was by a good user. This is not a popularity contest, it's supposed to be about the writing.
Submitted by Sofa_Ace (user info) at 2004-08-25 22:41:59 EDT (#)
Ranking: -2
Whoopdie fucking doo. You're posting about what posts you read? Who gives a fuck? how the fuck does this have a positive rating? shut the fuck up.
Submitted by slyphter (user info) at 2004-08-25 22:30:37 EDT (#)
Ranking: -1
+2 for being absoloutly correct.
-1 for this:
"1. NSFW is rarely posted on something that could get my ass fired "
Its ok, just tell your boss "Oh, i was just wasting time, and your money browsing this internet site that has nothign to do with work and some boobs popped up because some idiot didn't put NSFW in the title." Jesus Christ man. I've never worked anywhere (except my own business) where surfing non work related sites was within network usage policy.
Submitted by krushul (user info) at 2004-08-25 22:14:29 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
this is mainly why i haven't even started posting my own writing here. it would really be my first time sharing anything outside of journals or message boards and i would want genuine feedback. sadly, i think it would easily just get lost in the crowd.
Submitted by Smurfs (user info) at 2004-08-25 20:28:21 EDT (#)
Ranking: 0
I agree
Submitted by Gnome (user info) at 2004-08-25 20:25:47 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
can't argue.
Submitted by Degreeless_Capibara (user info) at 2004-08-25 20:24:56 EDT (#)
Ranking: -2
Who cares? One less hit, big deal. Your loss, anyway.
Submitted by Krautski (user info) at 2004-08-25 20:21:06 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
Yavol
Submitted by Timmah (user info) at 2004-08-25 20:07:39 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
No Comment
Submitted by d_prime (user info) at 2004-08-25 20:06:49 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
kickass system
oh, and you know, whenever you say youre going to get -2s beacause you always do, you jinx it and thats when you get an average like 1.5 =P
Submitted by NetProphet (user info) at 2004-08-25 20:06:15 EDT (#)
Ranking: -1
So why is it that my post didn't make the cut?
Hour of Despair (Rating: 2 on 12 reviews, last by NetProphet 2 hours ago)
Submitted by prophet (View user info) at 2004-08-25 15:21:59
Submitted by Evil_Morg (user info) at 2004-08-25 20:00:29 EDT (#)
Ranking: 1
Well said. Uber is just like the real world, some people are worth while but most are idiots.
Submitted by disAbled (user info) at 2004-08-25 19:58:29 EDT (#)
Ranking: 0
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Submitted by I_Have_a_Kristen_Fetish_ (user info) at 2004-08-25 19:52:40 (#)
Ranking: 2
http://www.ubersite.com/m/42889
You can't say there were 5 good ones based on rankings because you have people like me out there who -2 the shit out of good posts.
Fuck you!
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I determined the final five after I had read all the ones from the previous list. I thought those five were worth reading, while the others were either worthless or should have been saved for SPT tomorrow.
Submitted by youarsoghey (user info) at 2004-08-25 19:56:34 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
Oh come on. Who doesn't get a kick out of ATHF quotes? GOOD TIMES.
Submitted by I_Have_a_Kristen_Fetish_ (user info) at 2004-08-25 19:52:40 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
http://www.ubersite.com/m/42889
You can't say there were 5 good ones based on rankings because you have people like me out there who -2 the shit out of good posts.
Fuck you!
Submitted by NerfHerder (user info) at 2004-08-25 19:48:10 EDT (#)
Ranking: 1
I wrote today's post in 14 minutes on a whim.
Submitted by DonkeyOnTheEdge (user info) at 2004-08-25 19:46:16 EDT (#)
Ranking: 1
I'm ashamed. I must write better.


