Semen, Spice-canisters and seven year olds (909 hits)
Category: Humor -> Dirty HumorRating: -0.5 on 7 reviews (Rate this item) (V)
Submitted by B. Badger (View user info) at 2004-08-26 18:03:43 EDT
Now, my circle of friends from elementary school had a healty obsession with bodily fluids. Not strange for a bunch of horny teenagers, puke, spit, semen, blood - it's all good baby!
My friend Chris, a true redneck who listens to Pantera and Down (his highest dream is living in NOLA and/or Texas) has been called "Spiceboy" or simply "Spice" for the better part of his adult life.
Why you ask?
Well, it started out late one night at the rural school in Hicksville, Sweden...
*Que piano-music*
Chris and his band had obtained the keys to his school (Walldorf-kind of school, hippie-crap), and practiced for the upcoming graduation-party, they played in a Misfits-cover band at that time. The singer (a.k.a The Horse) later stuck some candy up his ass but that's another story. Around eleven Chris and the drummer are bored out of their minds and horny as hell.
They leave the practice-space and walk into the school cafeteria.
Chris looked at the spice-rack
Chris got an awful idea
Chris looked at the drummer
The drummer looked at the spice-rack
Chris grabbed his crotch
The drummer understood
They each took a spice-canister ("French Herbs") and went of to the bathrooms
masturbated furiosly
and shot their loads in respective canister, shook and replaced them on the rack.
Remember, the rack belongs to the part of the cafeteria used by grade 1-3..."It's dynamite baby!"
*Que dramatic piano/percussion duel*
The next day, Chris and the drummer snuck early into the cafeteria and spent the rest of the day laughing their asses of and high-fiving each other every time some seven year old got a "spicy meal".
Fucking rednecks.
I'm really fucking glad I went to an urban school (where shit from a clogged toilet started dripping into the classroom during a german exam...)
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User Reviews
Submitted by d_prime (user info) at 2004-08-26 21:26:39 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
that was disgusting.
but it was very very entertaining.
Submitted by Timmah (user info) at 2004-08-26 21:25:37 EDT (#)
Ranking: 1
No Comment
Submitted by Phinch (user info) at 2004-08-26 21:12:22 EDT (#)
Ranking: -2
get your hands om some ritalin.
worked for me.
Submitted by tinactin (user info) at 2004-08-26 19:57:02 EDT (#)
Ranking: -1
+1 for effort.
Submitted by GodLovesALittleLovin (user info) at 2004-08-26 18:25:00 EDT (#)
Ranking: -1
Ovaries, bags of wheat, and lepers.
There that's better.
Submitted by NetProphet (user info) at 2004-08-26 18:18:05 EDT (#)
Ranking: -2
Uhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhh...
Mmkay...
Submitted by b_badger (user info) at 2004-08-26 18:05:19 EDT (#)
Ranking: 0
Fuck, I screwed up the image