The Peeves of Jeeves (758 hits)
Category: NoneRating: -1.56 on 17 reviews (Rate this item) (V)
Submitted by Jeeves (View user info) at 2004-08-28 16:58:13 EDT
Many things get on our nerves. Whether it's the guy in the next cubicle that rocks back in forth in his squeaky office chair for 8 hours straight, or the the simple pleasures of a small bag of chips is ruined when they get caught in the machine. I, Jeeves, present to you, things that annoy the living shit out of me.
Don't ever brag about having sex. There are some of us (actually, everybody but you) that get laid on a regular basis. I don't want to hear about your romp in the sack with the girl you've been trying to score with for months. Truth is, I've already had sex with her.
And her mother.
Women- do you like facial hair? On yourselves? No? Then why the hell do you have it? Many women between the ages of 20 and 99 have the thickest mustaches I've ever seen on a man or woman. How can you possibly wake up every morning, look in the mirror and not think to yourself "Maybe I should shave my mustache today?".
When I'm in the grocery store and I'm walking behind you obviously in a rush, please move your buggy to the side. Thank you. And as always, thank you for shopping at Polite.
Young people. Grow up already.
Old people. Die already.
Pedophiles. See above. (Shandy)
Women, if your original hair color is black and you dye it blonde, you probably suck tons of dick.
Fellas, if you have dyed blonde hair, you probably suck tons of dick. Tons.
Females, if you're going to bother touching a guy down there, don't even think about arousing us unless you plan on getting us off. We're not like you. If you're going to sit on the toilet, you might as well shit. Got it?
Why can't dudes piss in the toilet? The fucking bowl is at least a foot wide both ways. Sit down if you have to. Just make sure my toilet seat doesn't look like a mouse with yellow paint on his feet ran a race around it.
User Reviews
Submitted by SullyThePirate (user info) at 2004-08-29 00:01:44 EDT (#)
Ranking: -1
u r a retrad!11!q
Submitted by CoachMagirk27 (user info) at 2004-08-28 21:35:19 EDT (#)
Ranking: -2
That was pretty lame, and I agree with Charger.
Submitted by charger (user info) at 2004-08-28 21:27:13 EDT (#)
Ranking: -2
Have to love someone stupid enough to complain about others bragging about sex who then proceeds to brag about how much sex he has had in the next sentence. Moron.
Submitted by Rixes (user info) at 2004-08-28 17:41:09 EDT (#)
Ranking: -1
Oh, the guys are work are going to have a field day with this.
-- Homer Simpson
The Call of the Simpsons
Submitted by Rainer (user info) at 2004-08-28 17:30:55 EDT (#)
Ranking: -2
Boogity.
Submitted by Sideburns (user info) at 2004-08-28 17:30:17 EDT (#)
Ranking: -2
If I had a dollar for every dollar I spent, then WOOHOO! I'd have all my money back.
Submitted by shandythedog (user info) at 2004-08-28 17:27:20 EDT (#)
Ranking: 0
i'll forgive you on the basis of my love for your namesake
Submitted by shitfuck (user info) at 2004-08-28 17:18:26 EDT (#)
Ranking: -2
If you hate me so much, post about it.
I just broke my own golden rule, replying twice on a user with less than 20 000 hits.
Fuck you noob, fuck you, die.
Submitted by jeeves (user info) at 2004-08-28 17:10:25 EDT (#)
Ranking: 0
I hate users whose ID begin with S.
I hate you shitfuck. I hate sideburns too. And shandy.
Submitted by jeeves (user info) at 2004-08-28 17:09:42 EDT (#)
Ranking: 0
It was just a cheap shot Shandy, no harm meant.
Submitted by jeeves (user info) at 2004-08-28 17:09:11 EDT (#)
Ranking: 0
Submitted by shandythedog (user info) at 2004-08-28 17:07:47 (#)
Ranking: 0
jeeves, is agatha christie a murderer?
----------
Does Shandy like little boys?
YES!
Submitted by shitfuck (user info) at 2004-08-28 17:08:49 EDT (#)
Ranking: -2
Terrific!
Submitted by shandythedog (user info) at 2004-08-28 17:08:41 EDT (#)
Ranking: 0
and i guess nabakov must be a pedophile as well?
Submitted by jeeves (user info) at 2004-08-28 17:08:23 EDT (#)
Ranking: 0
Great, my post may be graced by all, even those less fortunate like the chap below me.
Submitted by shandythedog (user info) at 2004-08-28 17:07:47 EDT (#)
Ranking: 0
jeeves, is agatha christie a murderer?
just try and think about that if you're capable of it
Submitted by DUMFART (user info) at 2004-08-28 17:06:41 EDT (#)
Ranking: -2
Hmm... DUMFART doesn't like Jeeves.
You'se a DUMFART.
Submitted by jeeves (user info) at 2004-08-28 17:06:18 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
You read my mind.