GMAIL won't stop harrasing me (795 hits)
Category: RomanceRating: 0.63 on 32 reviews (Rate this item) (V)
Submitted by facts (View user info) at 2004-08-29 02:14:10 EDT
Dammit I have six invites to give away. Amuse me.
User Reviews
Submitted by ajanssen (user info) at 2004-08-30 11:05:04 EDT (#)
Ranking: 0
im at ajanssen.at.southwestfunding.com. for some reason it came up as anonymous earlier when i posted
Submitted by ajanssen (user info) at 2004-08-30 11:03:57 EDT (#)
Ranking: 0
i never got an invite. please help
Submitted by facts (user info) at 2004-08-30 01:26:44 EDT (#)
Ranking: 0
Ok first six got their invites, excluding the person who posted anonymously. If you are on hotmail or yahoo you may not get the invite, if not just post to this thread that you didn't get the invite and ill find a way to get it to you.
Submitted by EvrenWasHere at 2004-08-29 15:47:48 EDT (#)
Ranking: 0
Submitted by Sofa_Ace (user info) at 2004-08-29 14:19:49 (#)
Ranking: -2
Most of these jokes are from Ebaumsworld. Asshats.
Correct!
Submitted by Blitzen (user info) at 2004-08-29 15:35:33 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
if anyone's got a free one, i'll gladly take it off your hands
capn_ash.at.hotmail.com
Submitted by Sofa_Ace (user info) at 2004-08-29 14:19:49 EDT (#)
Ranking: -2
Most of these jokes are from Ebaumsworld. Asshats.
Submitted by facenuts (user info) at 2004-08-29 12:45:00 EDT (#)
Ranking: 0
I also have about 4 invites left.
Submitted by I_Have_a_Kristen_Fetish (user info) at 2004-08-29 06:47:28 EDT (#)
Ranking: -2
No Comment
Submitted by cigar (user info) at 2004-08-29 04:25:00 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
thanks sir.
Submitted by Beer_bong (user info) at 2004-08-29 04:23:27 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
medium_pimpin365.at.hotmail.com
Submitted by Beer_bong (user info) at 2004-08-29 04:22:54 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
OOOOOOOOOO MEMEMEMEMEMEMEME!!!!! Give me one, MEEEEEEEEE!
Submitted by Ainkara (user info) at 2004-08-29 02:55:26 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
I just want one cause everyone else does...
polgara_187.at.hotmail.com
Please?
What's big, red and eats rocks? A big red rock eater!! Haha, I like that joke....
Have a 2 to help your cause. Or mine. Whatever.
Submitted by EvrenWasHere (user info) at 2004-08-29 02:53:34 EDT (#)
Ranking: 0
Man, i really need to get a life.
Submitted by EvrenWasHere (user info) at 2004-08-29 02:53:06 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
The Official Facts Webpage
Real Ultimate Power
Hi, this site is all about Facts, REAL Facts. This guy is awesome. My name is Evren and I can't stop thinking about Facts. This guy is cool; and by cool, I mean totally 1337.
Facts:
1. Facts is a mammal.
2. Facts fights ALL the time.
3. The purpose of Facts is to flip out gmail accounts and post good articles
Weapons and gear:
Keyboard
Coolness
Brain
Coolness
Testimonial:
Facts can kill anyone he wants! Facts writes good ALL the time and doen't even think twice about it. This guy is so crazy and awesome that he flips out ALL the time. I heard that there was this kickass Facts post, And when some dude rated -2 Facts killed the whole town. My friend Mark said that he saw Facts totally uppercut some kid just because the kid opened a window.
And that's what I call REAL Ultimate Power!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
If you don't believe that Facts has REAL Ultimate Power you better get a life right now or he will -2 you!!! It's an easy choice, if you ask me.
Facts is sooooooooooo 1337 that I want to crap my pants. I can't believe it sometimes, but I feel it inside my heart. These guy is totally awesome and that's a fact. Facts cool, smooth, cool, strong, powerful, and 1337. I can't wait to start posting next year. I love Facts with all of my ratings (including my +1).
Q and A:.
Q: Why is everyone so obsessed about Facts
A: Facts is the ultimate paradox. On the one hand he don't give a crap, but on the other hand, Facts is very careful and precise.
Q: I heard that Facts is always cruel or mean. What's their problem?
A: Whoever told you that is a total liar. Just like other mammals, Facts can be mean OR totally awesome.
Q: What does Facts do when hes not flipping out Gmail accounts?
A: Most of his free time is spent posting, but sometime he h/-\x0rz. (Ask Mark if you don't believe me.)
;(
This is a picture of my best friend Facts showing off.
He's a lot cooler than me and almost done with becoming a MVA,
which is bragable.
Submitted by Drew Janssen <ajanssen.at.southwestfunding.com> at 2004-08-29 02:49:34 EDT (#)
Ranking: 0
it would be in your best interest
Submitted by ajanssen <ajanssen.at.southwestfunding.com> at 2004-08-29 02:44:55 EDT (#)
Ranking: 0
i am without question the biggest bastard in Texas. Please see posts "A moment in the Life of Drew" and "A moment in the Life of Drew Continued" from yesterday and the day before if you don't believe me. I need a gmail account to further this endeavor and continue to have fun at other's expense of others. Please help
Submitted by ajanssen <ajanssen.at.southwestfunding.com> at 2004-08-29 02:40:38 EDT (#)
Ranking: 0
i need a gmail account to further my asshole ways.
ajanssen5.at.yahoo.com
Submitted by EvrenWasHere (user info) at 2004-08-29 02:38:47 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
vsfbDsfKvfdsPleaseGiveMeaGmailAccountBecaseIWentThroughAllOfThisTroubleinTryingToSendYouSublimialMessagefduihGsfIlsgUdSah
Submitted by RouteTwo (user info) at 2004-08-29 02:36:13 EDT (#)
Ranking: 0
redpoint19.at.yahoo.com
Submitted by electrictoothsyndrome (user info) at 2004-08-29 02:35:55 EDT (#)
Ranking: 0
OR .....damnit!!!! ......OR!!!!
Fuck, I can't tipe!
that one was intentional.
Submitted by electrictoothsyndrome (user info) at 2004-08-29 02:34:57 EDT (#)
Ranking: 0
Have I started a trend of what? I think this is the first trend I ever started with the exception of tight-rolled jeans, which apparently wasn't a good idea.
Submitted by EvrenWasHere (user info) at 2004-08-29 02:33:39 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
Things to do with your AOL Disks.
At a restaurant, shove one under a wobbling table leg.
Christmas ornaments (the more the merrier).
Give them to young children play with.
Room dividers for hamsters.
Drink coasters.
Ice scraper.
Bathroom tile.
Air hockey puck.
Dog chew toy.
Pooper scooper.
Grill scraper.
Destroy them - smash, burn, or run over to relieve stress.
Light switch cover.
Chinese throwing stars.
Halloween treat.
Firewood.
Paper weights.
Incense burners (put stick in hole of disk hub and light the incense).
Put them on car windshields at the mall.
Hand them out as party favors.
House insulation.
Grind them up to make fake snow.
Hood ornament.
Give them as stocking stuffers.
Use them as elbow and knee pads.
Use them to decorate your aquarium and create Comp USA underwater.
Baby mobile. Fence (may need a few thousand).
Submitted by EvrenWasHere (user info) at 2004-08-29 02:32:22 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
The teacher asked her students to use the word 'fascinate' in a sentence. Mary said, "My family went to the New York City Zoo, and we saw all the animals. It was fascinating."
The teacher said, "That was good, but I wanted the word 'fascinate'."
Sally raised her hand. She said, "My family went to the Philadelphia Zoo and saw the animals. I was fascinated."
The teacher said, "Good, but I wanted the word 'fascinate'."
Little Johnny Siebert raised his hand. The teacher hesitated because Johnny was noted for his bad language. She finally decided there was no way he could damage the word 'fascinate' so she called on him.
Johnny Seibert said, "My sister has a sweater with 10 buttons, but her tits are so big she can only fasten eight."
Submitted by EvrenWasHere (user info) at 2004-08-29 02:31:18 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
These two guys meet after not having seen each other for many many years. First guy asks the second guy " how have things been going ? " The second guy speaking very s..l..o..w..l..y.. tells the first guy " I w..a..s.. a..l..m..o..s..t m..a..r..r.. i..e..d. The first guy says in amazement "Hey! you don't stutter any more." " y..e..s I w..e..n..t t..o a d..o..c..t..o..r a..n..d h..e t..o..l..d m..e t..h..a..t i..f I s..p..e..a..k.. s..l..o..w..l..y I w..i..l..l n..o..t s..t..u..t..t..e..r." The first friend congratulates him on not stuttering anymore and asks why he is no longer engaged to his girlfriend ". "W..e..l..l m..y f..i..a..n..c..e..e a..n..d I w..e..r..e s..i...t..t..i..n..g.. o..n h..e..r p..o...r..c..h a..n..d t..h..e d..o..g w..a..s s..c..r..a..t..c..h..i..n..g h..i..s b..a..c..k a..n..d I t..o..l..d h..e..r t..h..a..t w..h..e..n w..e a..r..e m..a..r..r..i..e..d s..h..e c..a..n d..o t..h..a..t f..o..r m..e a..n..d s..h..e t..h..r..e..w t..h..e r..i..n..g i..n m..y f..a..c..e.." "Why should she throw the ring in your face for that" asks the first friend " W..e..l..l I s..p..e..a..k s..o s..l..o..w..l..y, t..h..a..t b..y t..h..e t..i..m..e s..h..e l..o..o..k..e..d a..t t..h..e d..o..g. h..e w..a..s l..i..c..k..i..n..g h..i..s s..c..r..o..t..u..m"
Submitted by Circe (user info) at 2004-08-29 02:31:09 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
Can you send one to a friend of mine?
spacecoyote42.at.hotmail.com
He has my cat. I'd really like to get her back unharmed.
Submitted by EvrenWasHere (user info) at 2004-08-29 02:31:00 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
very attractive woman goes up to the bar in a quiet rural pub. She gestures alluringly to the bartender, who comes over immediately. When he arrives, she seductively signals that he should bring his face closer to hers. When he does so, she begins to gently caress his full beard.
"Are you the manager?" she asks, softly stroking his face with both hands. "Actually, no," the man replies. "Can you get him for me? I need to speak to him," she says, running her hands beyond his beard and into his hair. "I'm afraid I can't," breathes the bartender. "Is there anything I can do?"
"Yes, there is. I need you to give him a message," she continues, slyly popping a couple of her fingers into his mouth and allowing him to suck them gently.
What should I tell him?" the bartender manages to say. "Tell him," she whispers, "there is no toilet paper or hand soap in the ladies room.
Submitted by EvrenWasHere (user info) at 2004-08-29 02:29:37 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
One afternoon a wealthy lawyer was riding in his limousine when he saw two men along the roadside eating grass. Disturbed, he ordered his driver to stop and he got out to investigate.
He asked one man "Why are you eating grass?" "We don't have any money for food," the poor man replied. "We have to eat grass."
"Well, then, you can come with me to my house and I'll feed you" the lawyer said. But sir, I have a wife and two children with me. They are over there, under that tree." "Bring them along," the lawyer replied. Turning to the other poor man he stated, "You come with us also."
The second man, in a pitiful voice then said, "But sir, I also have a wife and SIX children with me!" "Bring them all, as well," the lawyer answered.
They all entered the car, which was no easy task, even for a car as large as the limousine was. Once underway, one of the poor fellows turned to the lawyer and said, "Sir, you are too kind. Thank you for taking all of us with you." The lawyer replied, "Glad to do it. You'll really love my place - the grass is almost a foot high!"
Submitted by EvrenWasHere (user info) at 2004-08-29 02:28:11 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
iamevren.at.sbcglobal.net
i have now compiled a list of random jokes for you amusement.
____________________________________________________________--
Three old men are sitting on the porch of a retirement home.
The first says, "Fellas, I got real problems. I'm seventy years old. Every morning at seven o'clock I get up and I try to urinate. All day long I try to urinate. They give me all kinds of medicine but nothing helps."
The second old man says, "You think you have problems. I'm eighty years old. Every morning at 8:00 I get up and try to move my bowels. I try all day long. They give me all kinds of stuff but nothing helps."
Finally the third old man speaks up, "Fellas: I'm ninety years old. Every morning at 7:00 sharp I urinate. Every morning at 8:00 I move my bowels. Every morning at 9:00 sharp I wake up."
How do you recycle a used tampon?
As a tea bag for vampires
Energizer Bunny arrested, charged with battery
One of our project teams hired a new PhD recently, so they took him over to our place to visit, and ask questions. At one point, he needed to known the diameter of one of our transducers, but we didn't know it.
The draftsman hands the scientist a vernier-style caliper. The scientist looks at it for a moment, sees that it has inches and millimeters marked off on it, then proceeds to hold the transducer up to the scaled part of the caliper in an attempt to eyeball it.
I practically spit out the water I was drinking. "Pete," I said, "You gave a caliper to a scientist? What are you thinking?"
Peter looked at the scientist's plight and said, "Oh, I'm sorry, but I'm gonna have to give you this." And he reached into his desk drawer to pull out a 6inch, neon pink ruler that said "Chuck E. Cheese" on it.
The scientist said, "That's what I need!" and promptly measured the transducer.
[Peter would like me to add that the (relatively cheap) caliper cost about $80. The ruler cost 32 tickets at Chuck E. Cheese.]
Submitted by Method (user info) at 2004-08-29 02:20:24 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
method.at.nyc.rr.com
= )
Submitted by cigar (user info) at 2004-08-29 02:20:09 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
please?
farmerboy_9999.at.yahoo.com
Submitted by SullyThePirate (user info) at 2004-08-29 02:17:18 EDT (#)
Ranking: -1
Hit.
Whore.
I'd dance like a retard for it but I already sold my soul for one.
Submitted by facts (user info) at 2004-08-29 02:15:42 EDT (#)
Ranking: 0
im going to sleep, the first six will get invites in the morning or afternoon.