Deep Water Dreams - Part 8 (829 hits)
Category: Science & EnvironmentalRating: 2 on 14 reviews (Rate this item) (V)
Submitted by SilvrWolf (View user info) at 2004-09-05 02:25:59 EDT
<I've decided to develop Bill's story a little further instead of killing them all off like I originally intended. I hope you all enjoy this installment as much as I enjoyed writing it. My mind has come alive with the different directions I can take this story now.>
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As usual, here's the list to the rest of this tale. Aside from whoring for hits, I'm just being user-friendly, so nyah. :P
Part 1 - http://www.ubersite.com/m/41854 --- Part 4 - http://www.ubersite.com/m/43424
Part 2 - http://www.ubersite.com/m/41987 --- Part 5 - http://www.ubersite.com/m/43593
Part 3 - http://www.ubersite.com/m/42645 --- Part 6 - http://www.ubersite.com/m/43668
Part 7 - http://www.ubersite.com/m/43919
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The wind and rain were still coming hard and the occasional gust rocked the boat. The boat rose and fell over each swell, giving the men on the boat a non-stop roller-coaster ride on the sea.
Tim, the worry and fear showing in his weathered face, looked at Sam, "Man... we're in trouble. You gotta go tell the skip."
Tim crossed his arms in defiance, "Fuck that! I'm not going. He'll chew a hole through my ass before he realizes that it's not our fault. You can go tell him yourself, 'cause I sure as hell won't."
"We'll talk about this later." Tim shoved the spotlight into Sam's chest as he brushed past him, headed to the wheelhouse. The skipper was waiting for him at the top of the ladder. Before he could speak, the trawler shuddered and pitched violently to the port side. The shriek of twisting metal and the crack of splintering wood boomed over the continuous crescendo of the storm. Tim had let go of the stair rail as he ascended the top and tumbled along the soaked deck.
Bill lost his footing, too, but held a firm grip on the handrail he was leaning on. He scrambled to his feet, looked at Tim, who was struggling to right himself. The boat was steadily pitching backward as his eyes shifted astern. For the first time in over fifty years, Bill Foley let a cry of shock and terror escape his lips. The inescapable reality of the powerful and mysterious sea came crashing into his heart in one terrifying instant.
The entire stern of the boat was gone. The men began to slide backwards as the trawler rocked backward on the face of a swell. The water crashed against the stairs to the wheelhouse and both men knew they'd never have the chance to send a mayday. After a quick glace at each other, the two men reached for the spotlights hanging from the platform above the pilot house.
"Godspeed," Bill said as their eyes met once again, "Get clear of the boat and find something besides your life jacket that floats, preferably something you can get on top of." Tim nodded and together they leaped away from the near-vertical vessel into the sea.
Their life vests struggled to hold them afloat in the turbulent waters. Bill and Tim were twenty feet away from each other. Bill watched the quickly disappearing bow bob like a toy in the froth and multiplying flotsam. He saw his dreams being sacrificed to the ocean he'd devoted his life to. For the second time in his life, his home and heart were thrown to the mercy of a cruel goddess.
Tim spat salty water from his mouth, "Skip! Where's Sam? I can't see him!"
Bill turned away from him and aimed his spotlight into the stormy night, scanning for Sam.
Tim shouted again, "Do you see-".
Not seeing any sign of Sam, Bill scanned back toward his pilot. The dark, endlessly rocking sea was all that met his light. He whipped the beam towards the bow of the sinking ship, trying to regain his bearings. Nothing but the rain and incessantly churning water remained there as well. In a moment of near panic, he franticly spun around in the water scanning for anything but the remains of his trawler. He cursed as he smashed his elbow against a piece of debris and dropped the spotlight.
The floating light flashed across his eyes as it righted itself. During his brief blindness, a peculiar observation flashed through Bill's mind; the ocean water was incredibly warm. It felt like bath water against his skin. The oddity of that feeling and the epiphany of its being slightly eased the creeping panic of his solitary situation. He groped for the spotlight as his vision was slowly returning.
Grabbing hold of the light once again, he picked it up and scanned out over the balmy water in a slow, deliberate search for either of his lost crew. He had turned three full rotations before his vision allowed him to see as far as the light would shine in the slacking rain and decreasingly turbulent sea, but he dared not stop searching.
As if trying to deny the reality of his solitude and sudden loneliness, his mind drifted into a state of objective observation of the world, revealed at the end of spotlight's beam. For a fleeting moment, his entire existence was focused within a 500,000 candlepower shaft of light. Regardless of what his mind tried to do to calm the impending emotional collision, his heart quickened its tempo as the truth smashed into it, his mind and very soul.
Bill Foley, his life and love devoted solely to the ocean, was alone, with nothing but the dark night and the sea, again. His mind, drifting towards shock, drifted to memories of that July night, the second night, in 1945.
User Reviews
Submitted by mbstateside (user info) at 2005-12-12 14:33:03 EST (#)
Ranking: 2
No Comment
Submitted by Brdn_Nkd (user info) at 2005-02-17 16:19:02 EST (#)
Ranking: 2
No Comment
Submitted by lrw (user info) at 2004-09-10 10:06:15 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
Can I please have some mo' ?
Submitted by electrictoothsyndrome (user info) at 2004-09-09 20:05:59 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
"The oddity of that feeling and the epiphany of its being slightly eased the creeping panic of his solitary situation."
This sentence seems just a little awkward and, for me at least, briefly, and in no real important way, interrupted the flow of another sparkling installment in what's becoming a very engrossing read. Let me explain... The confusion came from the phrase "epiphany of its being".
Having the word "being" act as a noun, which I am assuming was intentional, seems like the root of the problem -- but when you look at the sentence as a whole, you'll understand that this situation would be an epiphany of sorts for the captain, and should be treated with a little more attention, perhaps.
One more thing... From what we know about this captain Bill, he seems like a very stern, experienced, fearless seaman and captain. His reaction to what's happening seems a little odd for someone of that character profile. It almost seems as if he should be more defiant and, well, pissed off, and a little less reflective. This would seem to be more in keeping, perhaps, with his very worldly and bitter attitude.
But, maybe I am reading it wrong. I always like to read the previous installment just before I read the latest so I can refresh my memory completely (which is NOT easy). =)
You ARE going to win Ubermadness. But don't do it at the expense of this series, please!?! Keep up the EXCELLENT work!
PS: Your CDs should be sent out by this coming Monday. Later.
Submitted by NetProphet (user info) at 2004-09-06 23:08:17 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
Keep up the good work, Silvr.
One note:
"The wind and rain were still coming hard and the occasional gust rocked the boat. The boat rose and fell over each swell, giving the men on the boat a non-stop roller-coaster ride on the sea."
This quote upset me deeply for reasons beyond my understanding. It felt like a commercial for a theme park.
Submitted by Mrboogie23 (user info) at 2004-09-05 16:53:31 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
This series rules.
Keep it up.
Submitted by Spiral_Abraxis (user info) at 2004-09-05 16:13:35 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
http://www.ubersite.com/m/44098 <-------------------- naked women!
Submitted by StonedSilly (user info) at 2004-09-05 16:13:31 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
Before I even read it, you'd better get your ass on MSN or AIM.
Submitted by PWNstar (user info) at 2004-09-05 16:09:10 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
my internet was down and i went to the library just to check on this series.
well, that and makes sure ubermadness hadn't started yet.
Submitted by Impassive-Digressive (user info) at 2004-09-05 06:21:57 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
Tops. Keem 'em coming.
Submitted by jack11058 (user info) at 2004-09-05 03:56:17 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
Again, this series is the best on uber, dude. If you wanted to, I'm sure you could flesh this out into a novel or novella and get it published. Lots of good plot lines going, and all of them are interesting. KICK ASS.
Submitted by SilvrWolf (user info) at 2004-09-05 02:36:07 EDT (#)
Ranking: 0
Wow, Sully! I hadn't even finished reading it myself before you rated it. Thank you.
Submitted by SullyThePirate (user info) at 2004-09-05 02:31:02 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
Ok now I read it. +2
Submitted by SullyThePirate (user info) at 2004-09-05 02:28:27 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
I didn't even read it yet but this series kicks tons of bum.