Up your nose with a rubber hose. Well, up your ass with a piece of glass. (1491 hits)
Category: SportsRating: 2 on 3 reviews (Rate this item) (V)
Submitted by Gizmo <funkadel.at.punkass.com> (View user info) at 2004-09-05 15:33:50 EDT
Ladies and Gentlemen, I have figured out the pinnacle of thousands of years of cultual evolution...
Porn.
Honestly, the ammount of porn in this world is astounding. A list you say? http://imdb.com/List?genres=Adult&&tv=on&&heading=10;Adult&&nav=/Sections/Genres/Adult/include-titles Well, here it is. 21200 titles. I don't think I have seen that many non-porno movies. A few of my favorites include:
Up Your Ass 19
http://imdb.com/title/tt0310282/
Apparently 18 weren't enough. Straight from the creative minds in the porno business.
18 and Nasty 38
http://imdb.com/title/tt0408454/
Again, how creative do you have to be to work in these places. I can see the conversation now...
"What are we going to name the next film"
"Well the first one was 18 and Nasty, right?"
"Yea, so?"
"Damn I am hungry. Fuck it, let's just name it '18 and Nasty 2' and then every other film we make can be an 18 and Nasty film."
"GENIUS!"
120 Days of Anal
http://imdb.com/title/tt0166941/
That has got to be a record of some sort. Quick someone call the guiness book of world records!
10,000 Anal Maniacs
http://imdb.com/title/tt0131196/
Not quite the million man march. Not quite the band 10,000 Maniacs. But they LOVE anal.
21 Hump Street
http://imdb.com/title/tt0131204/
No ladies, Mr. Depp isn't in this movie. It also isn't from the 80's.
4 Fantastic Fucking Hours of Outdoor Slamming
http://imdb.com/title/tt0413639/
Now that's just unrealistic. Four hours?! I think it is usually like 17 minutes of awkward poking and weird sounds ending with the girl crying on the end of the bed saying "what have I done?" Or, at least that is my experience.
That's right. You think people of the future will remember us for our legitimate theatre? Wrong. They will look back and see "Backroom Facials" and think to themselves... "Wouldn't it be great to live back then?
User Reviews
Submitted by TimeCop (user info) at 2005-03-02 01:44:00 EST (#)
Ranking: 2
I MEANT feet above his head, but I fucked it up.
I am a true believer that porn is the great equalizer. You can find a porn about anything. If I just threw together a mix of things, people, and places, there'd probably be a set of it somewhere for $29.95.
David Schwimmer Monkey Blowjob Summer Gangbangs the Adams Family...With A Vengeance
Submitted by kingjc (user info) at 2004-09-05 16:25:31 EDT (#)
Ranking: 0
I'm in the some what dubious position that in the past I have been a porn afficiando. Having read about the business and even met a few stars, I can honestly say that alot of the titles that end with a number are in fact not new films but more like compliations of old films. The people who make the most money and have the control are women, in that it's one of the few industries in the world where women rule the roost (if anyone can think of another business like this please let me know). Who's the first porn star to make a million? Ben Dover? Rocco Sefredi? John Holmes? No. It's Jenna Jameson. Being a porn collector was a pain in the ass (excuse pun) since alot of the titles you mention here are just rehashs of other films. As long as their horny ass holes who will buy the first title they see with the word anal in it, titles like "backdoor sluts xxx (insert number here)" will exist.
Submitted by Spiral_Abraxis (user info) at 2004-09-05 16:19:20 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
http://www.ubersite.com/m/44098 <-------------------- naked women!