Jackass Landlord (666 hits)
Category: NoneRating: -0.5 on 2 reviews (Rate this item) (V)
Submitted by Mr. Awesome <steveisgreat.at.rock.com> (View user info) at 2004-09-09 16:51:23 EDT
I lost the keys to my house several weeks ago. No problem, I said, I'll just climb through my window until I find them. I would take a bucket and use it to give me the needed boost into my window, where I would have to fold myself in half to skootch through. The room's window faced the North, and nobody would ever see me. It worked very well, until last night.
Around 9:30 at night, I'm watching T.V. when I hear a crash and the sound of plastic hitting concrete, followed by a string of curses. I try to see outside, but my eyes were not adjusted to the dark, and as far as I knew, there was a black curtain over the window. I remained silent.
Soon after, I am walking through the kitchen when I see the landlord talking to the roommate who dosen't speak english, complaining. It seems that the landlord was the one who had been prowling outside my window and, for all I know, watching me. He had the nerve to tell me that he suspected that someone was climbing through the window. When I explained my predicament, he told me that that was probably why there was bugs in the downstairs portion of the house.
What the fuck?! Besides the fact that it takes only a few seconds to get through the window, how would he know that there were any bugs unless he wandered around the house when nobody was there. I am especially worried about that because my father leaves his room unlocked and anybody could walk in and have his hands on any number of persoal records. Take them, and my father could not prove he was my father or that he is a legal citizen.
I also think he has stolen things on more than one occasion. On my tenth birthday, I returned from my mother's house with a bag full of video games. I left them on the dining room table. The next day, they were gone. I've never seen them again. The same thing happened to a totally badass CD player I had. I come home from school. Say hi to the landlord. Walk inside, put down my bookbag and put my CD player on the sofa, and head off to the library for less than 40 minutes. Come back, and the CD player was gone. Of course, he dosen't have the balls to steal from me now that I could smash his face in if I saw him prowling around at night. He also steals our mail, although I can't prove it.
He has a disgusting girlfriend who donsen't have and teeth, and all she does is follow him around as he wastes his time replacing a door that wasn't broken when most of the gutters are broken and the porch is half rotted and held up with 2x4s. He also gets angry when Peter (the roommate who dosen't speak English) tries to fix anything, even though he's A FUCKING CARPENTER AND HE'S DOING THE WORK FOR FREE.
One day, my father went up to the attic and said that there was a work shirt there that he had thrown away five years ago. The landlord had to have dug through our garbage to find it. This jackass prowls the house at night, makes comments about how clean WE are (he looks like a fucking bum, and I have never seen him with any different clothes) parks his stupid van in front of the garage that we have to pay extra to use, dosen't fix anything, AND he digs through our garbage?!
I hate the man, and I would love to tell him what I think of him, except for one thing: the rent is $1000 a month. In SW Connecticut. For those who don't live around here, a teacher who wanted to move here said that a studio apartment was $3000. If I said anything to this subhuman, my father would smash all the glass in the house on my face.
Thankfully, we plan to move soon, and hen we do, I can investigate his house and tell him exactly what I think of him. I hope I find something of mine so I can wave it in his face and ask him what the fuck he was thinking.
User Reviews
Submitted by HelloMello (user info) at 2004-09-25 21:26:20 EDT (#)
Ranking: -2
No Comment
Submitted by Luso (user info) at 2004-09-09 16:57:40 EDT (#)
Ranking: 1
Kick his ass the day before you move. You can't let him give you shit all the time.