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Wildcat Stickies (NSFW) (920 hits)

Category: Science & Environmental

Rating: 0.33 on 3 reviews (Rate this item) (V)

Submitted by Euripides Trousers (View user info) at 2004-09-10 01:06:28 EDT

Have you ever lived with a wildcat? I do. He is big and fierce, and knows it. He's an enormous cunt* on steroids. Imagine 'Little Boy'** 2 nanoseconds after combustion, add some legs, a head with fly-blown ears. Attitude. There you have my wildcat. He is a genuine wildcat - I call him 'Fuzzy' just to demean and emasculate him. He deals with it; he's an operator.

Tonight (05:30 GMT) he has just wandered in looking, well, imploded.

Wherever you are on this planet, you will encounter what I have been conditioned to call 'Sticky Willies'. These are seeds with an exo-skeleton comprised of nature's velcro. Fuzzy has been hunting in crustaceous boogers*** tonight.

The wildcat resembles an orange peppered with cloves. Like the ladies amongst you might hang in your wardrobe to add a veneer of sweetness to that trouser-suit you know you should have had dry-cleaned in May.

*http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Cunt
**http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Little_Boy
***http://www.ubersite.com/m/43877

User Reviews

Submitted by BLITZKREIG_BOB (user info) at 2007-04-09 11:37:57 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2

No Comment

Submitted by tuesdaydelay (user info) at 2004-09-10 05:31:03 EDT (#)
Ranking: 0

http://www.ubersite.com/m/44509

Submitted by Burn (user info) at 2004-09-10 04:06:06 EDT (#)
Ranking: -1

Shut the fuck up.

Out at five, catch General Sherman at five-thirty, clean him at six, eat
him at six-thirty, back in bed by seven with no incriminating evidence.
Heh heh heh. The perfect crime.

-- Homer Simpson
The War of the Simpsons