Passing a drug test for dummies. (834 hits)
Category: Science & EnvironmentalRating: 1 on 7 reviews (Rate this item) (V)
Submitted by Rixes (View user info) at 2004-09-10 23:44:57 EDT
I work in the billing department for a large group of hospitals, several of my coworkers were former phlebotomists and lab technicians. I've heard several stories of parents bringing their children in and not telling them until they get to the lab that they are there for a drug test. Two stories stand out the most.
1. A young man went into the lab one day for a drug test, he went into the little bathroom, did his business, and came out and handed the cup over to the nurse. Some people don't realize they immediately do a temperature test on the sample to confirm its fresh. This kids sample wasn't even luke warm. His excuse? It was a cold day out.
2. Another young man was brought into the lab by his mother one day for a drug test. She declined to tell him that. Once the kid finds this out, he goes beserk, he starts throwing papers everywhere while his mother tries to get him under control, he struggles free and bolts out the door and starts running down the middle of an extremely busy street. They went ahead and marked positive.
All of this could have been avoided so easily. The solution? Bleach.
You know those tiny little bleach wipes that come in square packages? Keep one in your pocket when you go in, do your business, and dip the wipe into it. Don't be a dumbass and leave it in though.
I can 100% guarantee you will pass your drug test. Enjoy.
User Reviews
Submitted by shadowdragon (user info) at 2004-09-11 12:28:02 EDT (#)
Ranking: 1
better write this down on the inside of my eyelid...
Submitted by LexLutherin (user info) at 2004-09-11 06:59:45 EDT (#)
Ranking: 1
Yes, it is true. But I've read somewhere they're beggining to do testing for known methods of sample tampering. IE: They may know people put additives in the sample and test for the additives accordingly. To make sure this post isn't a bringdown for all of you pot smokers out there, I'll let you know that most places don't do those test. As a matter of fact my friend got into a North American military (I'll leave it at that) when he smoked weed all the time. Just used the standard methods to pass. The only way to pass a drug test FOR SURE is to stop smoking for about 2 months, or get one of those fake bladder dealies; and of course... urine from someone you know who is clean and approximately your age and gender.
Submitted by Avals (user info) at 2004-09-11 03:00:06 EDT (#)
Ranking: 1
Hey, cool! (I actually heard about this before, but good advice never gets old.)
Submitted by Rixes (user info) at 2004-09-11 00:02:50 EDT (#)
Ranking: 0
Yes, it is seriously true. You don't hear about it often because the people who sell the pills and drinks to clean out your system would lose all their business.
Submitted by Starlet at 2004-09-10 23:55:00 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
Wait...is that seriously true!?
Submitted by the_lone_stranger (user info) at 2004-09-10 23:51:08 EDT (#)
Ranking: 1
Is this true? Well that'd be just super!
Submitted by Rixes (user info) at 2004-09-10 23:45:51 EDT (#)
Ranking: 0
Why the fuck don't my pictures ever load.