Episode Five: My First Sexual Experiences (25915 hits)
Category: PoliticsRating: 0.45 on 16 reviews (Rate this item) (V)
Submitted by <sparky19852.at.yahoo.com> (View user info) at 2004-09-11 10:43:59 EDT
Episode Five: My First Sexual Experiences
WARNING: The following is the report of a person clinically diagnosed as a sociopath.
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For those of you who have read my prior posts, you know that I am a sex addict. I have had sex more times than I can count with more girls than I can count. I realize that some sad fucks don't get boned until they're my age, but I have already lived several lifetimes in the bedroom (actually, I have more often then not had sex in public forums).
But, I think that it is important for you all to hear about my early sexual encounters:
1) LOSING MY VIRGINITY
I was about three or four years old at the time and visiting with some friends of my parents, I think that they were babysitting me. I remember that they took me down to the basement and that it smelled really, really strange. I now think that it was probably from pot smoke.
Anyway, I remember that I was on the basement and the husband kept saying, "Sammie... Sammie... Look at all the people in TV land." The guy had a camera, but I was obviously too young to comprehend what "TV land" meant.
So, I just kept sitting there and then the guy's wife came and sat beside me.
"Sammie," she said. "We're going to play a game. You want to play a game?"
I shook my head.
"We have to take our clothes off first, though," she said.
What was about to happen was my introduction to the female form. After she got me naked, she took off her shirt. I remember the way her two large breasts glimmered in the lights. Then, she pulled off her pants and panties and there was this big hairy patch between her legs. I thought it was strange. Anyway, I remember looking up at the woman's middle-aged face. She looked strangely maternal to me. She undid her graying hair from its clip and let it fall around her shoulders.
"Okay," she said, "Let's play a game."
The game went on for probably an hour or so. The game consisted of kissing and touching and licking and so much more. In a short time, I became extraordinarily attracted to her form—the female form. Her breasts and her vagina and her ass (I loved her ass); they were all so strangely appealing to me.
And that was when I lost my virginity. I be an idiot and tell my parents about the whole thing. The two went to jail for child pornography for probably six years or so. I remember that my parents made a ton of money from the whole thing. I only wish that they had been allowed to keep the tape of me, because on that tape of that old housewife and me is my first sexual encounter.
Amazingly, however, this would not be the last I saw of the woman. That is to say, I never got to fuck her again, but I was playing around on KaZaA one day and I found this video of this woman having sex with a dog. I swear to God that she died her hair, but the woman in that video having sex with a German Shepard is the same woman that made that video with me.
2) THE GIRL AT THE DAYCARE
For months after this encounter, whenever my parents or sister couldn't watch me, I went to this daycare in my town. At the daycare, I met lots of kids and got into lots of trouble because, as I'm oh-so-eager to remind all of you, I am a sociopath and I get into mishaps wherever I go.
Anyway, I don't really have a story about the girl, I just remember she had blonde, curly hair and I thought she was pretty. I had just had my experience with the old woman a few months prior and it was fresh in my mind. So, at recess, I took a girl in this fort they had outside and I "played the game" again with her.
That evening, the girl's mother and the person that ran the daycare called my mom furious. Apparently the girl had told her parents about "the game" as quickly as I had told mine. My mom had to explain what had happened to me with the pornographers and luckily we weren't charged. She was still asked to never bring me to the daycare again.
3) PLAYING DOCTOR IN PRE-SCHOOL
In pre-school, I was playing doctor with this girl in the back of the room during playtime. She showed me hers, I showed her mine, and we went at it under the teacher's desk. We humped like bunny-rabbits and giggled the whole time. I don't now how the teacher didn't see, but hear us laughing, but she didn't. Luckily, I actually didn't get caught for this.
I can't remember all that well, and I'm not positive who this chick was, but I think it might have been Katrina, a girl who I would have another memorable experience with years later—see http://www.ubersite.com/m/44583.
4) MY FIRST GIRLFRIEND
Doesn't everyone remember his or her first boyfriend or girlfriend? Mine was Sarah. Sarah was a small tomboy who liked to wear jeans. I remember that she was tougher than half the guys in my class until she sprouted boobs and started acting more like a girl in 6th Grade. Anyway, we were in a kindergarten class together and hit it off instantly.
We used to see how many people we could make cry in one class without being kicked out, and we used to play "Attack the Dorks" at recess, where we just pummeled nerdy kids. We actually got suspended for the first time together in kindergarten, because we beat the crap out of some Chinese kid and it was considered a "hate crime." At that time in my life, I think I might have actually loved Sarah, and I am sure that she loved me. We were made for each other and knew it even back then. Now, even though we held hands a lot and even kissed every once week or so, we never had sex during that school year. That didn't happen until first grade.
As a side note, isn't it funny how social lives just stopped during the summers before 4th grade? I remember that until that time all my friendships were just put on hold over the summer until the next year.
But, we were in first grade together and I remember that this year we touched each other a lot more. She always used to comb her hands in my hair and I always used to feel her stomach and chest to see if she was growing boobies yet.
Anyway, every day during recess we used to meet behind a climbing wall for the older kids and have sexual exploits. I can't even imagine the sick twisted stuff that we did under there as little kids. It was really bizarre, like I used to stick rocks up her (you know) constantly.
We stopped going out, however, because I got bored with her. She just wasn't exciting to me anymore. I've since learned in sociology something interesting, though.
Apparently, as you grow, your sexually active zones switch around. I think that, for some reason, my genitals turned off one day and I just wasn't interested in doing it anymore. Another possibility, I've noticed that it's harder for sociopaths to keep an interest in anything for a long period of time, so maybe the girl just became a bore to me. I don't know.
Still, I would go out with her twice more. When she sprouted boobs in 6th Grade, I became her boyfriend for a few weeks, and then again only two years ago I took her to Homecoming and scored with her again, but we broke up after like four days because I boned her best friend. I guess we have one of those love/hate relationships.
...
Anyway, those were my first four sexual experiences. Around that time, memories start getting blurry and I don't exactly remember what happened when. I do cherish my each of these golden memories as a young boy, though and also...
If you know who that old lady is that I lost my virginity to, please give her my email address. I'm not going to touch her pussy after I saw her making it with that German Shepard, but maybe we could do a BJ or hand job or anal or something.
THE CHRONICLES SO FAR:
Episode 1 - "The Sociopath Movement" (9-9-04) http://www.ubersite.com/m/44546
Episode 2 - "What is ACTUALLY a rape?" (9-10-04) http://www.ubersite.com/m/44583
Episode 3 - "My Sexual Deviant Cousin" (9-10-04) http://www.ubersite.com/m/44640
Episode 4 - "First Fight at College" (9-10-04) http://www.ubersite.com/m/44668
Episode 5 - "My First Sexual Experiences" (9-11-04) YOU'RE HERE!
User Reviews
Submitted by Sanatarium (user info) at 2005-02-10 21:58:04 EST (#)
Ranking: 2
Great stuff, I love it
Submitted by erbgor (user info) at 2005-01-12 19:16:20 EST (#)
Ranking: 0
Yeah, you really have done better work. And sodomy is gay.
Submitted by Totally_useless (user info) at 2004-12-27 09:18:41 EST (#)
Ranking: 2
Sorry I didn't see this series earlier.
I am hooked.
Submitted by Revolutionman (user info) at 2004-12-20 02:00:42 EST (#)
Ranking: 2
have my babies
Submitted by MaximusPadus (user info) at 2004-12-08 20:22:37 EST (#)
Ranking: 2
keep them coming, you are god.
Submitted by EchoBoxing (user info) at 2004-11-07 16:03:01 EST (#)
Ranking: -2
i actually read this one and ranked it appropriately.
Submitted by shandythedog (user info) at 2004-09-22 00:11:24 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
that's weird, i was sure i rated this before
Submitted by apollo88 (user info) at 2004-09-21 11:14:47 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
Amazingly, however, this would not be the last I saw of the woman. That is to say, I never got to fuck her again, but I was playing around on KaZaA one day and I found this video of this woman having sex with a dog. I swear to God that she died her hair, but the woman in that video having sex with a German Shepard is the same woman that made that video with me""""
i've seen that video.
Submitted by Adamdidit2u (user info) at 2004-09-14 11:05:26 EDT (#)
Ranking: -2
Not nearly up to par with your others stuff
Submitted by Kaelic (user info) at 2004-09-11 17:41:50 EDT (#)
Ranking: -2
You aren't a sociopath.
Submitted by jwlmar10 (user info) at 2004-09-11 15:08:37 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
this is an interesting series. keep em coming.
Submitted by Shlongy (user info) at 2004-09-11 12:41:49 EDT (#)
Ranking: 1
It may be a fraud- well, actually, it IS a tale of fiction- but it's pretty hot.
If you go for that kind of thing.
Ummm, I don't.
Uhhhhh, yeah, let me get out of here.
Submitted by Chronicles_of_College_Guy (user info) at 2004-09-11 12:28:20 EDT (#)
Ranking: 0
Well, I am a sociopath. My brain chemicals are different and I do (obviously) have an overactive sex drive. Maybe that has something to do with it. I never claimed to be a normal person.
Submitted by Avals (user info) at 2004-09-11 12:05:50 EDT (#)
Ranking: 0
I'm calling shenanigans.
Little kids have no problem getting an erection. Thing is, for them this is something random and means absolutely nothing. It's not a sign of sexual excitement, it's ... well, it's a sign they popped a random boner and have no idea why the fuck that happens. These kids sure as hell can't have sex though, and they'll feel no sexual attraction like you described.
Submitted by Chronicles_of_College_Guy (user info) at 2004-09-11 11:06:06 EDT (#)
Ranking: 0
It is possible. I'm sure I'm not the only person to have a sexual encounter at a yonug age.
Submitted by Embryophagic (user info) at 2004-09-11 11:00:33 EDT (#)
Ranking: -1
People are disgusting creatures.
How does a pre-schooler even manage an erection?