What this country needs... (637 hits)
Category: PoliticsRating: -0.91 on 14 reviews (Rate this item) (V)
Submitted by chaos-effect (View user info) at 2004-09-12 20:10:01 EDT
Our country is full of idiots and assholes who most can agree are a waste of oxygen. I'm sure most can agree with that. I was thinking about this problem the other day and came to the conclusion that free thought is to blame. No not free speech, free thought. We need more brainwashing sessions! These are the days where are forms of brainwashing is illegal. You can't even use subliminal messages... what the hell is our country coming to when a company can't cheat a working man out of his life savings? Sickening isn't it? Well like always I do have a solution.
We need more public executions
We need to watch and learn from the Muslims. The Muslims are hardcore, as hardcore as an religious group can be. What other religion would have the balls to decapitate someone on live T.V.? Christians, Jews, Catholics? Hell no! You see if we have executions as the punishment for everything, then people will just stop doing what they're doing. Of course Texas has been doing this for quite some time, but moving on... But before this can work...
Want to live? Have a kid? Get a damn licence.
If you need a licence in order to be alive than we'll quickly be able to weed out all of the assholes in this country. If you want to live legally, you need to take a test. It will include basic reading, your stance on , and basic math. If you fail, you die. You see, failing the test is a crime and all crimes are punishable by death and if you don't take the test, then you are living without a licence meaning you will be shot on sight. If you want to have a kid you'll also need a licence. If you're fit to live but we find that you have a the gene for stupidity in you, you'll be allowed to live but first we'll be forced give you (at a minimum) 200 hours of Microwave-gun-to-the-crotch therapy to make sure that you don't breed more morons. Finally the last part of the solution...
Chaos Effect is your god now
I'll be your new dictator and will work feverishly to remove free thought from all of the idiotic masses! The rest of the problems in this country will be sorted out and anyone who shows any bit of free thought will be brutalized by my Secret Police. And get this... being brutalized by my police force is a crime and you know what that means. You'll also be obligated to work in my coal mines if you want food and when you are not working you'll be forced to pray to a life size replica of my ass. That is what this country truly needs...
User Reviews
Submitted by Tuxebux (user info) at 2004-09-13 01:18:35 EDT (#)
Ranking: 0
Submitted by TheMidnight12AM (user info) at 2004-09-13 00:38:04 (#)
Ranking: 0
Lord Ilpalatzo...Hahahahahaha. Did I spell that right?
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no, Its ILLPALAZZO
I BELIEVE I WIN. AT THE GAME OF LIFE
THXSKAY
Submitted by Jo_of_the_golden_P (user info) at 2004-09-13 01:08:26 EDT (#)
Ranking: -1
by any chance do you like George Carlin?
Submitted by TheMidnight12AM (user info) at 2004-09-13 00:38:04 EDT (#)
Ranking: 0
Lord Ilpalatzo...Hahahahahaha. Did I spell that right?
Submitted by icarus1987 (user info) at 2004-09-12 23:37:25 EDT (#)
Ranking: 0
It has potential as a rant... but then you just got megomaniacal. You should have learned from Napoleon. Or Hitler. Or Lord Ilpallazo.
Submitted by cigar (user info) at 2004-09-12 21:22:20 EDT (#)
Ranking: -1
No Comment
Submitted by chaos-effect (user info) at 2004-09-12 20:35:32 EDT (#)
Ranking: 0
Sorry about that. I wrote that some time ago and was editing it a little bit and got a little distracted. Didn't notice a few of the gaps until now.
Submitted by downerSTAIN (user info) at 2004-09-12 20:33:55 EDT (#)
Ranking: -2
Yeah, you're cool.
Submitted by Jack_McCallum (user info) at 2004-09-12 20:29:28 EDT (#)
Ranking: -2
Submitted by chaos-effect (View user info) at 2004-09-12 20:10:01
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These are the days where are forms of brainwashing is illegal.
The Muslims are hardcore, as hardcore as an religious group can be.
It will include basic reading, your stance on , and basic math. If you fail, you die.
--
If simple communications skills are punishable by death then you are in deep shit, my friend.
Submitted by munkeypants (user info) at 2004-09-12 20:14:55 EDT (#)
Ranking: 0
"We need more public executions "
why don't you be a first and start a trend?
Submitted by Sideburns (user info) at 2004-09-12 20:13:57 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
eh... perhaps I was harsh with the rating. Here's a 2 to even it out. You can write. +2 for that.
Submitted by Degreeless3 (user info) at 2004-09-12 20:13:57 EDT (#)
Ranking: -2
So...what country are we in now?
Submitted by PatheticCapitalistFuck (user info) at 2004-09-12 20:13:51 EDT (#)
Ranking: -2
Unoriginal, and boring.
I shit in your general direction.
Submitted by chaos-effect (user info) at 2004-09-12 20:13:19 EDT (#)
Ranking: 0
I'll take that into consideration.
Submitted by Sideburns (user info) at 2004-09-12 20:12:01 EDT (#)
Ranking: -2
First post and already trying to take over?
Please remove your items and go to the back of the line to try again.