Scar (3028 hits)
Category: UberMadness!Rating: 0.65 on 329 reviews (Rate this item) (V)
Submitted by Uber Madness 2004 (View user info) at 2004-09-14 19:30:22 EDT
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This post is officially part of UberMadness!. Click here for more information on the rules and restrictions. |
Entry 1
"If any member of the family should die whilst in the shelter, put them outside; but remember to tag them first for identification purposes."Raymond Pereira paid no heed to this rather depressing warning, favouring instead the adjustment of his shelter blanket. His partially pant-covered legs were exposed to the air that was getting warmer by the minute. Where his family was, he neither knew nor cared. From his position on the floor he spotted his friend Andrew Ward break into a run towards him down the subway rails. Power had been cut to the electric rails, rendering the subway tube an inadvertent shelter for those trying to escape the surface. Andrew leant over and caught his breath, observing Raymond's large shin cut through the tears in his pants.
"That's quite a nick. Should I call the medic over?"
"I don't think it's something worth worrying over. It'll heal in good time."
"How about a Band-Aid? You should grab one just in case; you know, before he's out."
"I'll be fine. I won't be moving around much. It'll heal in good time."
Andrew could hardly hear him over the screaming of the frightened children, and their mothers trying frantically to console them, but failing admirably. It was the blind leading the blind- the mothers were scared too.
"It's enough to make you wonder sometimes if you're on the right planet."
With that, Andrew left Raymond to rest while he scurried to aid an old woman from the surface into the tunnel. And with that, he pulled the thick off-white blanket over himself, tucking the sides under himself to form a nice, soft cocoon amidst the chaos around him: his exile from the surrounding horrors of panicked people. This was their first exposure to real danger, and he wasn't surprised if it was their last. He of course was used to danger, or at least imagined danger. He had served admirably in the first Gulf War, and any opportunity where the shit could physically be scared out of him had passed him then. Over the following years he would become desensitised and lose his empathy for others. He wasn't the centre of the universe. He was the universe. Just as well, the worried parents and oblivious children around him took no notice. Their universe was collapsing out from under them.
He saw a family huddling for warmth diagonally from him. He saw the children watch their grandmother collapse painfully in front of them. Her death was ruled by the shelter medic as a result of contamination from a low-yield neutron bomb. How he could rule this was beyond Raymond, who had other things on his mind. For the grandmother, the untried and untrue method of 'duck and cover' turned out to be just that: untried and untrue. But it was worth a shot. She would invariably be carried back to the surface, but not before being tagged.
He was not worried about his family members in other parts of the country, who were undoubtedly experiencing what he was right now. Years of alienation and neglect had estranged them from him. Raymond did not attend his grandmother's funeral. Instead, he lounged around his apartment downloading porn and watching Fresh Prince while his answering machine became flooded with tearful messages. Raymond was too important for that shit.
More recently, when his friend Marti was hospitalised for angina pains in his former hometown, his family neglected to inform him. When Ray called Marti, there was not much to be said. The tables were turned. He reflected on this for a moment: after years of shutting his family out of his life, they had responded in kind. He was used for them reaching for him, begging him to come to light-hearted family get-togethers, urging him to come to mourn lost family members. He was used to the feeling of them reaching for his presence, for him to say a few solemn words or tell a few off-colour jokes. He loved that feeling. But as he lied in his cocoon, he finally realised that they were no longer reaching out for him. Somewhere on the surface, a lone bomb slammed into the ground. What looked like a coffee tin rattled down the steps to the surface, passing under the turnstile, accompanied by a low, steady hiss. Raymond ducked his head under his blanket.
His moment of realisation was painful, intensified by the reverberations of the explosion followed by a sudden muting of all noise around him. He looked around the subway; the child's screaming had subsided and the protective calls of the mothers had been silenced. All had dropped slowly and quietly, into what appeared to be a deep sleep. No further sound but the slow, dying hiss of the coffee tin object. He felt the drowsiness on his face, in his eyes, and in his nostrils as he breathed it in. Raymond pushed aside his warm blanket and was surprised by how hot it was. It felt like a blow dryer on his legs through the tears in his pants. He felt the heat push his wound open further, causing a disconcertingly pleasant sensation. He walked slowly up the stairs leading to the street level. With every step he took, pain shot through his leg. It was indeed quite a nick, as Andrew had put it- and where he was, Raymond did not know. Perhaps it wouldn't heal in good time.
Upon reaching the ground level, Raymond's senses were assaulted at all ends by what he was witnessing. The green tint of the sky blending into an orange horizon; the stench of burnt flesh and blood all around him; the sight of a hundred prop-powered bombers flying overhead and things that looked half human crawling amongst the debris on the sidewalks; the taste of lead and ash in his mouth; the feel of infernal heat of his fingertips and face; and most memorably, the sound of it all. The hissing of rising smoke clouds from the burnt and demolished buildings; the cries for help; the screaming of children and adults who were not lucky enough to be killed instantly or silenced by the invisible gas. The air raid sirens blared loudly, but not loudly enough to drown out the whistling of bombs falling from the sky, or the low whirring of propellers. Raymond could just make out a flag being raised on a pole at ground level. Whose flag it was, he simply could not say. It really didn't matter to him.
Needless to say, Raymond never had to worry about his nick.
"I wonder if it'll scab over after I die. I never had a really cool scar."
- VS -
Entry 2
Warning: Beer can cause you to do stupid and fun things. Use excessive amounts for better results.
Entry 1:
1Point21Gigawatts
Adamdidit2u
Ainkara
alu
Alykorn
Ancius
Anjie
apollo88
ardubs
AshK
AshyLarry
AvrilLaPete
Awko
babydoll
Banga3386
Barlow
Bigmike
bklyn65
blasphemous_girl
BoogieFevuh
Bryan
BugMeNot
butterball
Can_Always_Trust_A_Liar
CaptainAmik
Caulaincourt
checkyourmail
Circe
comicbookguy
corn_nugget
Coyote
creep_firebombing
d_prime
DarthAwesome
DavyJones
Death_Metal_Dude
dicquellis
Dino
Dirtbird
dirty_gook
dodahdave
Domochevsky
DonkeyOnTheEdge
Double-Disorder
drsamedi
dudette
Durae
dwr_budr
EatMeCompletely
EchoBoxing
electrictoothsyndrome
Electro
Endo_Fire
engine13
enraged_baboon
espo
evolydal
Fabish
facts
Falconer
Feazy
FilthyAssistant
fog
Freakmagnet
Fulcrum
FunnyAsCancer
G_Nonny
gamma
Gent
GhostWriter
gibberish
Gnome
griffsrgr8
Grover
hamilton
hcp28
humor_me
I.G
I_Have_a_Kristen_Fetish
Id
iddqd
Impassive-Digressive
Ingsoc
IronChef
j00
jack11058
Jack_McCallum
Jared_IRL
JMG114
JohnGalt
Judoka
kabigon
Katja
kingjc
kitchens_closed
Kristen
LaNa
Legitch
littledan
lojope
loki
Loren1
Lost_Gator_Fan
lucid
Lyric
maiorano84
Malificent
Martyn_Steiner
Method
Midnight_Laydee
mikethescottish
MM_LP_Track3
Monarch
mountain24
MyNameIsTim
mystiamoon
Nator
Natsukau
NerfHerder
NetProphet
Norman
oddity420
ohlookasquirrel
OneCheapGeek
Orla
oxanar
Papajoe
ParlorTrick
Pentameter
Philst82
Phinch
Pingu
pobz
polly
potatomanjack
Pringles4eva
ProfessorDuck
professorfuckface
purringbubbles
PWNstar
Quasiplasmohedron
QueenAshlee
Rainer
ralphmacchio
RamJetMax
redraven
rurumon
russizm
salmonofdoubt
Scott_James
ScoutCJustice
screamfeeder
seanfogy
sebcharrot
shadow
shitfuck
SilvrWolf
sketch9
Skippy
Slovin
Slypher
smokymtcsw
Smurfs
Snark
sparkle_pink
SPECIALk
spedmonkey
Spiral
Spiral_Abraxis
Spookster
Spooner
strider
sublime
SullyThePirate
tammy
Teephphah
the_lone_stranger
thebigbird
Therighteouswicked
Timmah
tinactin
tshia2
ugaly
UltraJesus4000
User10030
Vermin
vodka7tall
Walrus_King
wazzawazzayo
Wiggles
WiKi
will9180
William_Q_Percy
WillZone
Worm
WRECKER
Yes
yetti_girl
youarsoghey
YouLookLikeINeedADrink
Zoidberg
zombieZero
153 eligible votes (202 total) *
Entry 2:
01011010
91teggyRS
aldes
Allyson
antluvdog
apple_tush
Arsenal
AwesomeJohnson
Azriel
Badlands
Beer_bong
BillsSBChamps
BleedTheSky
Blitzen
BLITZKREIG_BOB
bob
boskjeff
BoxcarChild
Brdn_Nkd
Burn
c1ndy
catscradle
cexshun
ChaoticFuntime
Chinaski
chipolatte
cigar
congo
cshape
dakingisdead
darko
DataForge22
deadSurfer
Disektor
DrPresident
EmptyRobot
english_summer_rain
ess-arr
firefly
Fr057m0urn3
Fugi
gbusman
Genko
girlreporter
Gram_Cracker
Hairsphincter
Herpes
hyprspacd
Ignore_the_Small_Print
jimbo
JonnyBoy
Julia
knucklesnelson
LadyPlural
legallady
lessthanfour
Lily
lrw
Luckystar
MickGinny
munkeypants
Natalia_Everitt
Oscar
PatheticCapitalistFuck
polyamorousaj
Pooz
razmataz73
Razor
runninginplace
Salmon
satchel
Scotsman
screaney
shandythedog
shark25
Sideburns
Silkmaestro
Siren
Smithstudd
someone
Stabkill
steph
stevie_says
Stin
StonedSilly
ThatOneGirl
thaumaturge
The_Walrus
tlozoot
Totally_useless
treedom
triple_optics
tuesdaydelay
voodoochild
whiskey_jack
67 eligible votes (95 total) *
* Eligible votes are those made by users who had either (A) posted 3+ messages OR (B) written 100+ [lowered from 750+] reviews as of the beginning of the UberMadness! competition.
User Reviews
Submitted by JonnyX (user info) at 2005-05-09 12:13:48 EDT (#)
Ranking: 1
classic Electro
Submitted by Fulcrum (user info) at 2004-09-19 17:06:19 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
No Comment
Submitted by firefly (user info) at 2004-09-18 23:32:54 EDT (#)
Ranking: 1
No Comment
Submitted by Zak <ZakTheFlame.at.aol.com> at 2004-09-18 20:24:34 EDT (#)
Ranking: 0
I liked 2 for it's humor, but it didn't go with the tone the first entry set.
Submitted by BoxcarChild (user info) at 2004-09-18 17:02:58 EDT (#)
Ranking: 0
No Comment
Submitted by 01011010 (user info) at 2004-09-18 00:34:58 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
No Comment
Submitted by tammy (user info) at 2004-09-17 20:51:57 EDT (#)
Ranking: 0
No Comment
Submitted by blasphemous_girl (user info) at 2004-09-17 15:09:44 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
No Comment
Submitted by Papajoe (user info) at 2004-09-17 11:57:51 EDT (#)
Ranking: 1
No Comment
Submitted by aldes (user info) at 2004-09-17 11:02:29 EDT (#)
Ranking: 0
No Comment
Submitted by boskjeff (user info) at 2004-09-17 10:58:12 EDT (#)
Ranking: 0
No Comment
Submitted by babydoll (user info) at 2004-09-17 10:36:17 EDT (#)
Ranking: 1
No Comment
Submitted by Teephphah (user info) at 2004-09-17 09:00:27 EDT (#)
Ranking: 0
No Comment
Submitted by Arsenal (user info) at 2004-09-17 02:50:30 EDT (#)
Ranking: -1
After reading the first few lines. It's probably not razor. But fuck him...I'm Drunk. #2 is still better cause at least they didn't suck at what they were trying to do
Submitted by Arsenal (user info) at 2004-09-17 02:45:33 EDT (#)
Ranking: -2
Saw Reagan. Hate the fact that we as a country immortalize a fucking person who, 1000 years from now, will be a fucking nobody. At least beer will be around 1000 years from now.
And I feel like the first one was Razors. Fuck you.
Submitted by darko (user info) at 2004-09-17 02:26:53 EDT (#)
Ranking: 1
No Comment
Submitted by ChaoticFuntime (user info) at 2004-09-17 01:42:56 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
No Comment
Submitted by Therighteouswicked (user info) at 2004-09-17 00:42:06 EDT (#)
Ranking: 0
No Comment
Submitted by Hairsphincter (user info) at 2004-09-16 23:55:33 EDT (#)
Ranking: 0
No Comment
Submitted by cshape (user info) at 2004-09-16 23:38:47 EDT (#)
Ranking: 0
No Comment
Submitted by cigar (user info) at 2004-09-16 23:25:35 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
No Comment
Submitted by voodoochild (user info) at 2004-09-16 22:51:15 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
That is just awesome
Submitted by IronChef (user info) at 2004-09-16 22:44:34 EDT (#)
Ranking: 1
No Comment
Submitted by griffsrgr8 (user info) at 2004-09-16 22:34:01 EDT (#)
Ranking: 0
No Comment
Submitted by Slypher (user info) at 2004-09-16 21:59:22 EDT (#)
Ranking: 0
what the hell?
Submitted by BugMeNot (user info) at 2004-09-16 21:06:26 EDT (#)
Ranking: 1
No Comment
Submitted by butterball (user info) at 2004-09-16 20:52:01 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
I can imagine this one being quite close....but #1 wins
Submitted by DataForge22 (user info) at 2004-09-16 20:47:29 EDT (#)
Ranking: 0
cool
Submitted by english_summer_rain (user info) at 2004-09-16 20:00:16 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
*giggle*
Submitted by Fugi (user info) at 2004-09-16 17:30:43 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
Ha Ha..this was boss
Submitted by UltraJesus4000 (user info) at 2004-09-16 17:02:13 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
awesome
Submitted by superdude at 2004-09-16 17:01:05 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
oh yeah
Submitted by Ingsoc (user info) at 2004-09-16 17:01:03 EDT (#)
Ranking: 0
lol, it's funny because beer is something you drink and you act dumb later! wtf!
Submitted by Silkmaestro (user info) at 2004-09-16 16:54:47 EDT (#)
Ranking: 0
No Comment
Submitted by Spooner (user info) at 2004-09-16 16:34:21 EDT (#)
Ranking: 0
I wonder who made #2...
Submitted by sebcharrot (user info) at 2004-09-16 16:31:17 EDT (#)
Ranking: 0
Did electro make that second post?
Submitted by Worm (user info) at 2004-09-16 16:27:32 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
Number 1 was excellent.
2 was funny, but its been done.
Good job to both.
Submitted by Pringles4eva (user info) at 2004-09-16 15:23:31 EDT (#)
Ranking: 0
fuck you, author 2.
Submitted by EmptyRobot (user info) at 2004-09-16 15:20:36 EDT (#)
Ranking: 0
No Comment
Submitted by congo (user info) at 2004-09-16 14:47:02 EDT (#)
Ranking: 0
I guess I was just more entertained by the second one.
Submitted by vodka7tall (user info) at 2004-09-16 14:37:17 EDT (#)
Ranking: 0
No Comment
Submitted by Norman (user info) at 2004-09-16 13:43:43 EDT (#)
Ranking: -2
No Comment
Submitted by gbusman (user info) at 2004-09-16 13:33:26 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
For sheer entertainment value, #2. Even if I'm the only one.
-Bus
Submitted by gamma (user info) at 2004-09-16 13:09:13 EDT (#)
Ranking: 0
No Comment
Submitted by thebigbird (user info) at 2004-09-16 13:05:53 EDT (#)
Ranking: 1
no comment
Submitted by littledan (user info) at 2004-09-16 12:32:05 EDT (#)
Ranking: 0
No Comment
Submitted by mountain24 (user info) at 2004-09-16 12:01:45 EDT (#)
Ranking: 0
No Comment
Submitted by Ignore_the_Small_Print (user info) at 2004-09-16 11:24:21 EDT (#)
Ranking: 0
how are you supposed to choose between two so totaly diferent submitions?!?!
Submitted by ralphmacchio (user info) at 2004-09-16 11:10:44 EDT (#)
Ranking: 0
No Comment
Submitted by Brdn_Nkd (user info) at 2004-09-16 08:56:01 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
Sorry entry 1 entry 2 was better.
Submitted by Azriel (user info) at 2004-09-16 08:26:44 EDT (#)
Ranking: 1
AHHAHHAHAHA... It's funny but it isn't at the same time.
Submitted by Rainer (user info) at 2004-09-16 07:48:29 EDT (#)
Ranking: 1
No Comment
Submitted by 91teggyRS (user info) at 2004-09-15 22:50:16 EDT (#)
Ranking: 0
No Comment
Submitted by steph (user info) at 2004-09-15 22:41:43 EDT (#)
Ranking: 0
No Comment
Submitted by purringbubbles (user info) at 2004-09-15 21:41:45 EDT (#)
Ranking: 1
it was pretty good!
Submitted by catscradle (user info) at 2004-09-15 21:32:11 EDT (#)
Ranking: 0
.....
Submitted by d_prime (user info) at 2004-09-15 21:28:09 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
im looking forward to two cop-out-ers going head to head. just give whoever gets the most random votes would go up against a bi
Submitted by stevie_says (user info) at 2004-09-15 21:13:58 EDT (#)
Ranking: 1
I laughed at post Two...then a coworker thought I was laughing at a joke he made. So I had to talk to him. Damn you.
Submitted by yetti_girl (user info) at 2004-09-15 21:01:55 EDT (#)
Ranking: 1
Very good.
Submitted by Nator (user info) at 2004-09-15 20:25:23 EDT (#)
Ranking: 0
No Comment
Submitted by SilvrWolf (user info) at 2004-09-15 20:10:52 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
No Comment
Submitted by Skippy (user info) at 2004-09-15 20:03:47 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
No Comment
Submitted by espo (user info) at 2004-09-15 19:52:57 EDT (#)
Ranking: 0
"turn down the suck. turn up the good." - Fubar
Submitted by smokymtcsw (user info) at 2004-09-15 19:42:56 EDT (#)
Ranking: 0
yeah i did not love it, but think it took more work. maybe I am wrong. i could have loved it, I loved parts of it, but I wanted to imagine our country with bombs dropping from prop planes and could not. Ronald never would have let that happen.
Submitted by ess-arr (user info) at 2004-09-15 19:29:46 EDT (#)
Ranking: 0
damn I have a scar from a shopping cart accident too...
Submitted by Electro (user info) at 2004-09-15 19:24:05 EDT (#)
Ranking: 0
No Comment
Submitted by Bryan (user info) at 2004-09-15 19:03:37 EDT (#)
Ranking: 0
No Comment
Submitted by lessthanfour (user info) at 2004-09-15 19:03:28 EDT (#)
Ranking: 0
No Comment
Submitted by will9180 (user info) at 2004-09-15 17:32:53 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
No Comment
Submitted by LaNa (user info) at 2004-09-15 17:31:42 EDT (#)
Ranking: 0
No Comment
Submitted by Lyric (user info) at 2004-09-15 16:58:02 EDT (#)
Ranking: 0
No Comment
Submitted by WRECKER (user info) at 2004-09-15 16:49:59 EDT (#)
Ranking: 0
gave me the chills
Submitted by hyprspacd (user info) at 2004-09-15 16:48:21 EDT (#)
Ranking: 0
No Comment
Submitted by Id (user info) at 2004-09-15 16:25:35 EDT (#)
Ranking: 0
uh.....I like sci fi....and what the hell was entry 2!?
Submitted by munkeypants (user info) at 2004-09-15 15:54:05 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
They were both well done. It was a very tough decision!
Submitted by Blitzen (user info) at 2004-09-15 15:29:09 EDT (#)
Ranking: 0
No Comment
Submitted by Oscar (user info) at 2004-09-15 15:27:43 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
Why not.
Submitted by shitfuck (user info) at 2004-09-15 14:50:22 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
Beautiful writing. Solid.
Submitted by Martyn_Steiner (user info) at 2004-09-15 14:47:05 EDT (#)
Ranking: 0
Drinking is for common retards who have too little imagination to think of something fun to do.
Submitted by NetProphet (user info) at 2004-09-15 14:45:52 EDT (#)
Ranking: 0
Entry one was exceedingly well written. I have a feeling the author will place in the top sixteen. The second one was rather weak by comparison, in my humble opinion.
Submitted by Endo_Fire (user info) at 2004-09-15 14:42:08 EDT (#)
Ranking: 0
No Comment
Submitted by mike <gioiamike.at.yahoo.com> at 2004-09-15 14:40:01 EDT (#)
Ranking: 1
very good story.
Submitted by dodahdave (user info) at 2004-09-15 14:31:06 EDT (#)
Ranking: 0
No Comment
Submitted by knucklesnelson (user info) at 2004-09-15 14:20:13 EDT (#)
Ranking: 0
No Comment
Submitted by adema <49534539> at 2004-09-15 14:15:25 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
wtf #2
Submitted by Grover (user info) at 2004-09-15 14:14:26 EDT (#)
Ranking: 0
No Comment
Submitted by Julia (user info) at 2004-09-15 13:47:58 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
No Comment
Submitted by FilthyAssistant (user info) at 2004-09-15 13:42:17 EDT (#)
Ranking: 0
No Comment
Submitted by BLITZKREIG_BOB (user info) at 2004-09-15 13:37:53 EDT (#)
Ranking: 0
The animation held my attention.
Submitted by thaumaturge (user info) at 2004-09-15 13:34:31 EDT (#)
Ranking: 0
No Comment
Submitted by lucid (user info) at 2004-09-15 13:31:29 EDT (#)
Ranking: 1
I hope these first few rounds end quickly.
Submitted by Pentameter (user info) at 2004-09-15 13:26:07 EDT (#)
Ranking: 0
No comment.
Submitted by JohnGalt (user info) at 2004-09-15 13:24:48 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
Hey Loren, maybe next time around we'll just let you pick the best post each round and turn off the voting altogether.
Submitted by c1ndy (user info) at 2004-09-15 13:18:47 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
cooooool
Submitted by Timmah (user info) at 2004-09-15 13:08:13 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
First one was fucking awesome.
Submitted by Scott_James (user info) at 2004-09-15 13:06:28 EDT (#)
Ranking: 0
No Comment
Submitted by Katja (user info) at 2004-09-15 13:06:06 EDT (#)
Ranking: 0
No Comment
Submitted by LadyPlural <imonadifferentcomputer@gofigur> at 2004-09-15 13:01:04 EDT (#)
Ranking: 0
Meh.
Submitted by Burn (user info) at 2004-09-15 12:48:33 EDT (#)
Ranking: 0
No Comment
Submitted by AshyLarry (user info) at 2004-09-15 12:17:01 EDT (#)
Ranking: 0
No Comment
Submitted by treedom (user info) at 2004-09-15 12:08:53 EDT (#)
Ranking: 0
No Comment
Submitted by potatomanjack (user info) at 2004-09-15 11:56:12 EDT (#)
Ranking: 0
No Comment
Submitted by Judoka (user info) at 2004-09-15 11:54:02 EDT (#)
Ranking: 0
No Comment
Submitted by strider (user info) at 2004-09-15 11:40:42 EDT (#)
Ranking: 0
one was OK. 2 was childish.
Submitted by Yes (user info) at 2004-09-15 11:25:52 EDT (#)
Ranking: 0
No Comment
Submitted by Monarch (user info) at 2004-09-15 11:25:51 EDT (#)
Ranking: 1
Is this a trick question?
Entry One: Very nice entry. I liked the feeling of it. Just the right length for the effect you tried for.
Entry Two: Come on, I think they're funny and all, but it just isn't UberMadness material.
Submitted by Ingsoc (user info) at 2004-09-15 11:22:19 EDT (#)
Ranking: -2
Beer wtf! lol! +2
Submitted by rurumon (user info) at 2004-09-15 11:12:53 EDT (#)
Ranking: 1
No comment
Submitted by Loren1 (user info) at 2004-09-15 11:11:33 EDT (#)
Ranking: -2
I'm with enraged baboon.
This is a writing competition, not a grade-school fingerpainting contest.
And just to vote for something "because it's different" is a crock of steaming CRAP people. Come on, grow the FUCK UP and vote like adults.
If you aren't going to vote for something based on it's merit, AND compared to it's competition in a literal level, but rather because you are "bored" --- then you are really, really short-changing the better author and the time they invested.
How would you all feel if you actually lost to a crappy, pixilated TOTAL rip-off of an animation? -2 for everyone who voted for what I consider an automatic forfeit.
Submitted by cexshun (user info) at 2004-09-15 11:07:08 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
This is definately one of the more difficult votes so far.
Submitted by Anjie (user info) at 2004-09-15 11:05:05 EDT (#)
Ranking: 1
Great story #1...enjoyed it immensely!
Cute animation #2, but not cute enough for me to vote for.
Well done both of you...
Submitted by tlozoot (user info) at 2004-09-15 11:03:31 EDT (#)
Ranking: -1
Eh.
Submitted by Loren1 (user info) at 2004-09-15 10:59:45 EDT (#)
Ranking: 0
No Comment
Submitted by Caulaincourt (user info) at 2004-09-15 10:49:41 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
I wonder who was entry 2
Submitted by lrw (user info) at 2004-09-15 10:49:13 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
made me laugh a lot.
Submitted by apollo88 (user info) at 2004-09-15 10:37:52 EDT (#)
Ranking: 0
No Comment
Submitted by fog (user info) at 2004-09-15 10:35:55 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
No Comment
Submitted by dicquellis (user info) at 2004-09-15 10:35:33 EDT (#)
Ranking: 0
No Comment
Submitted by loki (user info) at 2004-09-15 10:33:10 EDT (#)
Ranking: 0
No Comment
Submitted by RamJetMax (user info) at 2004-09-15 10:21:59 EDT (#)
Ranking: 0
No Comment
Submitted by redraven (user info) at 2004-09-15 10:21:16 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
No Comment
Submitted by shark25 (user info) at 2004-09-15 10:14:35 EDT (#)
Ranking: 0
Number 2 because it was different.
Submitted by Smurfs (user info) at 2004-09-15 10:05:13 EDT (#)
Ranking: 0
eh
Submitted by runninginplace (user info) at 2004-09-15 09:56:53 EDT (#)
Ranking: 0
No Comment
Submitted by WiKi (user info) at 2004-09-15 09:34:38 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
Hmmm..wonder who wrote #2..
Submitted by enraged_baboon (user info) at 2004-09-15 09:31:19 EDT (#)
Ranking: 0
GET FUCKED WITH YOUR BULLSHIT ANIMATIONS
ANYONE WHO EXPECTS TO WIN WITH AN ANIMATION NEEDS THEIR HEAD CHECKED
JESUS CHRIST
Submitted by BillsSBChamps (user info) at 2004-09-15 09:29:22 EDT (#)
Ranking: 0
No Comment
Submitted by drsamedi (user info) at 2004-09-15 09:28:37 EDT (#)
Ranking: 0
No Comment
Submitted by AshK (user info) at 2004-09-15 09:26:34 EDT (#)
Ranking: 0
No Comment
Submitted by wazzawazzayo (user info) at 2004-09-15 09:17:09 EDT (#)
Ranking: 0
Sorry E.
Submitted by Alykorn (user info) at 2004-09-15 09:07:38 EDT (#)
Ranking: 1
Yes it made me smile in a demented way. Good story.
Submitted by Scotsman (user info) at 2004-09-15 09:05:43 EDT (#)
Ranking: 0
I almost feel guilty for voting for a stupid animation but it was funny which is what I needed.
Submitted by razmataz73 (user info) at 2004-09-15 08:57:40 EDT (#)
Ranking: 0
I feel bad. Neither were my taste. But I ended up voting for 2, because of the unique approach. I don't see as many cartoons and other media lasting too long in the contest, so I might as well support the work it takes to create them early on.
Submitted by Jared_IRL (user info) at 2004-09-15 08:48:10 EDT (#)
Ranking: 1
No Comment
Submitted by Adamdidit2u (user info) at 2004-09-15 08:38:00 EDT (#)
Ranking: 0
No Comment
Submitted by EatMeCompletely (user info) at 2004-09-15 08:35:46 EDT (#)
Ranking: 1
No Comment
Submitted by WillZone (user info) at 2004-09-15 08:34:01 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
no contest
Submitted by Dirtbird (user info) at 2004-09-15 08:26:53 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
No Comment
Submitted by mikethescottish (user info) at 2004-09-15 08:18:03 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
Not bad for first round entries. I feel distinctly out of my depth...
Submitted by Totally_useless (user info) at 2004-09-15 08:15:50 EDT (#)
Ranking: 0
No Comment
Submitted by Badlands (user info) at 2004-09-15 08:11:33 EDT (#)
Ranking: 0
No Comment
Submitted by jimbo (user info) at 2004-09-15 07:51:34 EDT (#)
Ranking: 0
No Comment
Submitted by Midnight_Laydee (user info) at 2004-09-15 07:29:59 EDT (#)
Ranking: 1
Kind of eerie and chillingly written in such a matter-of-fact way. Really does make you think of what happens to people in war zones which seem so far away from us...but what also could be a reality for us within our lifetime. Here's to hoping it never comes to this again.
Submitted by DarthAwesome (user info) at 2004-09-15 07:27:15 EDT (#)
Ranking: 0
No Comment
Submitted by I_Have_a_Kristen_Fetish (user info) at 2004-09-15 07:07:14 EDT (#)
Ranking: 1
No Comment
Submitted by tuesdaydelay (user info) at 2004-09-15 07:03:07 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
AHAHA! Electro man, you rock.
Submitted by Fabish (user info) at 2004-09-15 06:59:40 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
What the hell just happened?
Submitted by triple_optics (user info) at 2004-09-15 06:44:23 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
hee hee
Submitted by Beer_bong (user info) at 2004-09-15 06:39:32 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
Excessive goofiness caused my voted.
Submitted by dudette (user info) at 2004-09-15 06:31:53 EDT (#)
Ranking: 0
Entry 1 blew away 2.
Submitted by Walrus_King (user info) at 2004-09-15 06:00:43 EDT (#)
Ranking: 0
I thought that number 2 was funny although I enjoy the writing in number 1.
Submitted by pobz (user info) at 2004-09-15 05:59:24 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
No Comment
Submitted by Philst82 (user info) at 2004-09-15 05:49:37 EDT (#)
Ranking: 1
No Comment
Submitted by Ainkara (user info) at 2004-09-15 05:23:15 EDT (#)
Ranking: 0
No Comment
Submitted by kingjc (user info) at 2004-09-15 05:11:02 EDT (#)
Ranking: 1
like entry one description of war. painted a very clear picture. entry 2 is certainly different just did nothing for me im affraid
Submitted by Stin (user info) at 2004-09-15 05:00:58 EDT (#)
Ranking: 1
Not sure if you get DQ for being blatantly recognisable, but never mind.
Submitted by Ancius (user info) at 2004-09-15 05:00:14 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
had to vote for quality of writing over amusing content.
tough call though, the quality is what i would expect from people down the line a bit.
Submitted by apple_tush (user info) at 2004-09-15 04:27:50 EDT (#)
Ranking: 0
No Comment
Submitted by creep_firebombing (user info) at 2004-09-15 04:16:07 EDT (#)
Ranking: 0
No Comment
Submitted by Malificent (user info) at 2004-09-15 04:09:08 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
Nicely done.
Submitted by I.G (user info) at 2004-09-15 04:03:24 EDT (#)
Ranking: 0
No Comment
Submitted by ProfessorDuck (user info) at 2004-09-15 03:45:28 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
That was absolutely awesome!
Submitted by Double-Disorder (user info) at 2004-09-15 03:41:09 EDT (#)
Ranking: 0
No Comment
Submitted by professorfuckface (user info) at 2004-09-15 03:38:41 EDT (#)
Ranking: 0
Looks like electro won't be making any more animations in ubermadness.
Submitted by dwr_budr (user info) at 2004-09-15 03:36:10 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
Beer is wonderful but I'm a sucker for the apocalypse.
Submitted by Spookster (user info) at 2004-09-15 03:27:11 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
Entry one by a long shot although the picture at the end kinda killed it...
Submitted by Falconer (user info) at 2004-09-15 02:59:15 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
No Comment
Submitted by seanfogy (user info) at 2004-09-15 02:42:14 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
what a shame that the first entry had to be wasted on a stupid picture.
entry one, no contest
Submitted by Banga3386 (user info) at 2004-09-15 02:41:25 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
This was a horseshit pairing though. Entry one had a lot of thought or at least talent behind it with a great imagination. Entry two was just a silly lame ass cartoon that he crapped out weeks ago. What should have been a title for two great posts, only lent itself to one good story and a load of shit in flash form.
Submitted by the_lone_stranger (user info) at 2004-09-15 02:37:28 EDT (#)
Ranking: 0
1 was a decent read. 2 made my ass scab over.
Submitted by evolydal (user info) at 2004-09-15 02:02:43 EDT (#)
Ranking: 1
No Comment
Submitted by William_Q_Percy (user info) at 2004-09-15 01:48:29 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
Fucking electro.
Submitted by Quasiplasmohedron (user info) at 2004-09-15 01:46:57 EDT (#)
Ranking: 0
I can't believe people voted for 2. It didn't even make any sense. Losing to a couple of stick men would suck.
Submitted by ugaly (user info) at 2004-09-15 01:46:25 EDT (#)
Ranking: 0
No Comment
Submitted by Quasiplasmohedron (user info) at 2004-09-15 01:41:27 EDT (#)
Ranking: 1
1 was pretty good, but nothing special.
Submitted by Lily (user info) at 2004-09-15 01:40:56 EDT (#)
Ranking: 0
The story was hard to get through, albeit well written. #2 wins.
Submitted by DavyJones (user info) at 2004-09-15 01:16:27 EDT (#)
Ranking: 0
I am not a fan of either entry.
Submitted by Kristen (user info) at 2004-09-15 00:57:13 EDT (#)
Ranking: 0
No Comment
Submitted by GhostWriter (user info) at 2004-09-15 00:47:34 EDT (#)
Ranking: -2
No Comment
Submitted by Siren (user info) at 2004-09-15 00:40:58 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
This was oh, so close...
Submitted by screaney (user info) at 2004-09-15 00:38:31 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
...
Submitted by mystiamoon (user info) at 2004-09-15 00:34:13 EDT (#)
Ranking: 1
No Comment
Submitted by alu (user info) at 2004-09-15 00:33:05 EDT (#)
Ranking: 1
No Comment
Submitted by FunnyAsCancer (user info) at 2004-09-15 00:28:59 EDT (#)
Ranking: 0
So tough...to decide...intelligent side says 1...kid side says 2...
Submitted by CaptainAmik (user info) at 2004-09-15 00:28:03 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
was that even a contest?
Submitted by MyNameIsTim (user info) at 2004-09-15 00:27:29 EDT (#)
Ranking: 0
No Comment
Submitted by Death_Metal_Dude (user info) at 2004-09-15 00:24:24 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
HAHA
I want to vote for 2 but I can't ignore how good 1 was.
Submitted by girlreporter (user info) at 2004-09-15 00:22:21 EDT (#)
Ranking: 0
No Comment
Submitted by Sideburns (user info) at 2004-09-15 00:09:49 EDT (#)
Ranking: 0
This was like voting for apples and oranges.
I wonder who wrote number two. Hmmmm.
Submitted by professorfuckface (user info) at 2004-09-14 23:46:15 EDT (#)
Ranking: 0
Electro, your animations are nasty and awful.
Submitted by BoogieFevuh (user info) at 2004-09-14 23:42:00 EDT (#)
Ranking: 0
I'm sorry for the author of entry 1...did all that work writing for nothing.
Granted, 2 was still funny, but not what this contest is about.
Submitted by PWNstar (user info) at 2004-09-14 23:38:48 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
No Comment
Submitted by PatheticCapitalistFuck (user info) at 2004-09-14 23:27:00 EDT (#)
Ranking: 0
--------------------------------------
Submitted by ohlookasquirrel (user info) at 2004-08-25 21:49:49 (#)
Ranking: 2
Is it just me or are the majority of these titles VERY VERY EMO.
To apologize again for my squattail title fucking up madness last time, here are a few titles. I'll come back with some more later.
Dancing music
Scar
Tell everyone
--------------------------------------
Submitted by kabigon (user info) at 2004-09-14 23:22:10 EDT (#)
Ranking: 1
No Comment
Submitted by Wiggles (user info) at 2004-09-14 23:21:38 EDT (#)
Ranking: 0
No Comment
Submitted by Stabkill (user info) at 2004-09-14 23:20:54 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
Mercy vote.
Submitted by Slovin (user info) at 2004-09-14 23:15:41 EDT (#)
Ranking: 0
Is this Ingsoc vs Electro?
Submitted by sketch9 (user info) at 2004-09-14 23:12:34 EDT (#)
Ranking: 0
Submitted by ohlookasquirrel (user info) at 2004-09-14 21:55:10 (#)
Ranking: 2
What the fuck is an angina?
---------------------
its an animal's vagina. animal + vagina = angina.
Submitted by whiskey_jack (user info) at 2004-09-14 23:12:06 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
Great stuff. Happyrefic.
Submitted by Slovin (user info) at 2004-09-14 23:11:23 EDT (#)
Ranking: 0
No Comment
Submitted by 1Point21Gigawatts (user info) at 2004-09-14 23:09:16 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
One. Easily.
Submitted by iddqd (user info) at 2004-09-14 23:06:43 EDT (#)
Ranking: 0
No Comment
Submitted by Salmon (user info) at 2004-09-14 23:06:12 EDT (#)
Ranking: 0
No Comment
Submitted by sketch9 (user info) at 2004-09-14 23:05:36 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
i liked it. well, number one.
two just didnt grab me... because it was an animation probably.
i voted on pure content, and one was a lot more interesting
Submitted by Gram_Cracker (user info) at 2004-09-14 23:05:31 EDT (#)
Ranking: 1
Well, the second entry wasn't really an entry. Pretty funny though, so it gets my vote. I liked the first until the end. The picture just turned me off.
Submitted by Awko (user info) at 2004-09-14 22:59:53 EDT (#)
Ranking: 0
No Comment
Submitted by Gnome (user info) at 2004-09-14 22:54:58 EDT (#)
Ranking: 1
No Comment
Submitted by Feazy (user info) at 2004-09-14 22:52:38 EDT (#)
Ranking: 0
No Comment
Submitted by sparkle_pink (user info) at 2004-09-14 22:51:50 EDT (#)
Ranking: 0
No Comment
Submitted by Spiral_Abraxis (user info) at 2004-09-14 22:39:25 EDT (#)
Ranking: 0
No Comment
Submitted by Domochevsky (user info) at 2004-09-14 22:32:34 EDT (#)
Ranking: 0
No Comment
Submitted by PatheticCapitalistFuck (user info) at 2004-09-14 22:29:06 EDT (#)
Ranking: 0
Submitted by ohlookasquirrel (user info) at 2004-09-14 21:55:10 (#)
Ranking: 2
What the fuck is an angina?
---------------------------------
An angry vagina.
Submitted by PatheticCapitalistFuck (user info) at 2004-09-14 22:27:20 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
No Comment
Submitted by zombieZero (user info) at 2004-09-14 22:22:10 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
No Comment
Submitted by DrPresident (user info) at 2004-09-14 22:21:20 EDT (#)
Ranking: -1
No Comment
Submitted by antluvdog (user info) at 2004-09-14 22:21:11 EDT (#)
Ranking: 0
#1 would have been a good short story. It didn't work as an Ubermadness entry for me.
Submitted by electrictoothsyndrome (user info) at 2004-09-14 22:19:30 EDT (#)
Ranking: 0
This one was tough. Entry one would have been better off without the last two lines.
Entry two was fucking funny. Kinda had to flip a coin to be honest - although imaginary. I went with the writing. I wouldn't be suprised if the other entry won though.
Submitted by Allyson (user info) at 2004-09-14 22:17:10 EDT (#)
Ranking: 0
No Comment
Submitted by SPECIALk (user info) at 2004-09-14 22:10:39 EDT (#)
Ranking: 0
Submitted by ohlookasquirrel (user info) at 2004-09-14 21:55:10 (#)
Ranking: 2
What the fuck is an angina?
***
i think it's some sort of heart condition
Submitted by Fr057m0urn3 (user info) at 2004-09-14 21:56:26 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
No Comment
Submitted by ohlookasquirrel (user info) at 2004-09-14 21:55:10 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
What the fuck is an angina?
Submitted by G_Nonny (user info) at 2004-09-14 21:51:01 EDT (#)
Ranking: 0
No Comment
Submitted by someone (user info) at 2004-09-14 21:46:01 EDT (#)
Ranking: 0
No Comment
Submitted by hamilton (user info) at 2004-09-14 21:44:34 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
Post 1 was beautiful.
Submitted by bklyn65 (user info) at 2004-09-14 21:44:23 EDT (#)
Ranking: 0
No Comment
Submitted by Bigmike (user info) at 2004-09-14 21:42:56 EDT (#)
Ranking: 0
No Comment
Submitted by NerfHerder (user info) at 2004-09-14 21:42:25 EDT (#)
Ranking: 0
No Comment
Submitted by Circe (user info) at 2004-09-14 21:42:20 EDT (#)
Ranking: 0
Meh.
Submitted by Chinaski (user info) at 2004-09-14 21:40:41 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
hah, excellent!!
Submitted by Coyote (user info) at 2004-09-14 21:39:57 EDT (#)
Ranking: 1
No Comment
Submitted by tshia2 (user info) at 2004-09-14 21:38:27 EDT (#)
Ranking: 0
No Comment
Submitted by Freakmagnet (user info) at 2004-09-14 21:34:18 EDT (#)
Ranking: 1
AHHHH! I hav't written enough reviews for my vote to count. FUCK ME!
Submitted by