For Shlongy, and anyone else who is running out of ideas. (889 hits)
Category: NoneRating: 1.78 on 15 reviews (Rate this item) (V)
Submitted by Jack McCallum (View user info) at 2004-09-16 12:41:41 EDT
If I Can't Think of Anything...
Submitted by <nolan.at.Baseballwriter.net>
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...Should I bother staring a post about it? Please, let's have a civil and adult discussion about this quandary. If possible.
http://www.ubersite.com/m/45121
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Hey Shlongy-
Here are some things you can think about. I'm done with them.
-Dancing sickness from ergot poisoning.
-Guys named Ralph.
-Snails vs slugs.
-Corduroy. I can't stand it!
-Magellan was full of shit and annoyed everyone around him.
-Canadians are always yelling about something, yet WE are the bad guys.
-Buckminster Fuller had a cool fucking name.
-Once in the 'Ginger or Mary Ann' debate I heard a guy ask, "What about Mrs. Howell?" and nobody ever talked to him again.
-Coated Aspirin is for pussies.
-Why does my skull have those ridges in the back?
-I was once standing in line at a KFC when I noticed a shirtless black guy right behind me, and could not help but notice his damn-near inch-long nipples. I found the sight so utterly disturbing I ran outside, walked around the block, smoked a cigarette, and went back in after nippleman was gone. Has this ever happened to you?
-I really hate tea drinkers.
-I can't wait for the next ten years or so when all the young guys taking Viagra begin to discover they have permanently damaged blood circulation in their dicks and can't get it up.
-Mickey Rooney always looks like he smells really bad.
-I'm dreading the coming wave of Barney nostalgia.
-If you use the word 'slacks' I will punch you in the head.
-Pamela Anderson may be a bimbo, but from the interviews I've seen and read she seems like a very nice girl despite having seen her with a mouthful of wang in that video a few years ago
-The 'M' in 'ATM' stands for machine, you idiot, so why do you keep saying 'ATM machine?'
-Fucking leaf blowers. Just sweep that shit up already!
-My hatred for Bob Saget is with me still
-Cell phones with cutesy ring tones push me to the brink of homicide
-Single-ply toilet paper. Is there even a point?
-Women.
-The only time smoking is bad for you is when you realize you are out of cigarettes.
-Germans are funny when they get mad.
-Silk underwear for men. I mean, what the fuck?
-I liked the old Maytag repairman better.
-Why did those bastards at Nestle think Quik needed a cartoon mascot?
-Little sugar packets in coffee houses. Put the goddamned sugar in a jar so I don't have to stand there all fucking day ripping and pouring!
-Our cash is getting all gayed up with color and I do not like it.
-What happened to Wayne Newton's face?
-People who answer 800 assistance lines who can't speak English. What the fuck? This is STILL America, right?
-Why do black kids yell so much on the bus?
-Ever notice how 'fun size' can apply to anything that will fit in a chick's mouth except a penis?
-Any minute now the ACLU is gonna charge the white tiger that attacked Roy Horn with a hate crime and says it was a case of 'gay-bashing.'
-I don't think there is anything my body can produce and excrete that I haven't already tasted at some point in my life.
-What DID Ward Cleaver do for a living, anyway?
User Reviews
Submitted by Jack_McCallum (user info) at 2005-07-31 13:33:23 EDT (#)
Ranking: 0
Supreme Overlord damage repair...
Submitted by Supreme_Overlord (user info) at 2005-07-21 22:04:45 EDT (#)
Ranking: -2
shite
Submitted by Falco (user info) at 2004-09-16 20:43:41 EDT (#)
Ranking: 0
Err ok.
Submitted by tinactin (user info) at 2004-09-16 19:15:22 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
This is a pretty damn good list
Submitted by Jack_McCallum (user info) at 2004-09-16 18:52:55 EDT (#)
Ranking: 0
Submitted by Shlongy (user info) at 2004-09-16 18:34:23 (#)
Ranking: 2
Speaking of, what the fuck's the story with that Alan Colmes' face?
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He looks like you could snap him in two like a breadstick.
Submitted by Shlongy (user info) at 2004-09-16 18:34:23 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
Well, as far as I'm concerned, and if you really took the time to think about it, I'm the only one whose (or is it who's?) opinion really matters...these are ALL good ideas for a post.
Hell, they're all good ideas/topics for a Hannity and Colmes hour-long fair and balanced discussion.
Speaking of, what the fuck's the story with that Alan Colmes' face?
Submitted by Jack_McCallum (user info) at 2004-09-16 16:05:37 EDT (#)
Ranking: 0
Submitted by Shlongy (user info) at 2004-09-16 14:52:49 (#)
Ranking: 2
I think that list just about covers everything...everything of any interest, at least.
You say those ideas are "free agents"?
I can run with one of them?
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Go for it. I got a whole new crop growing in my brain today...
Submitted by gassygirl73 (user info) at 2004-09-16 15:08:22 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
Pam Anderson, I still haven't seen that video damnit.
Submitted by Shlongy (user info) at 2004-09-16 14:52:49 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
I think that list just about covers everything...everything of any interest, at least.
You say those ideas are "free agents"?
I can run with one of them?
Submitted by 1Point21Gigawatts (user info) at 2004-09-16 13:32:02 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
Thanks, I'll bookmark this post and steal them when I run out of ideas.
Submitted by DrCactus (user info) at 2004-09-16 13:23:33 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
For reminding me of the best line ever from Bob Saget.
"Ever sucked dick for crack? Didn't think so."
Submitted by Monarch (user info) at 2004-09-16 13:22:46 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
All good ideas. This is almost PSA material, or at least worthy of being linked to.
The public deserves to know!
Submitted by strider (user info) at 2004-09-16 13:14:14 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
those actually could turn out to be good topics.
Submitted by BLITZKREIG_BOB (user info) at 2004-09-16 12:56:32 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
Funny.
Submitted by Totally_useless (user info) at 2004-09-16 12:45:53 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
I would have liked to see some of these topics in UM.