My brother, the comeback connoisseur (1688 hits)
Category: NoneRating: 1.36 on 47 reviews (Rate this item) (V)
Submitted by MixMaster J (View user info) at 2004-09-19 03:31:25 EDT
One fine afternoon, my brother and I went on a super fun massive shopping spree at one of the world's largest malls. Well, it was super fun for me. More like torture for my brother. It's the end of the day, and we're both tired. It takes forever to walk to all the stores, let alone look at clothes, try them on, and find the ever-elusive washrooms.
Naturally, we're dragging our feet a bit after this taxing excursion.
As we're making our way out, this random guy who is wearing a baseball cap comes walking behind us. After a few seconds, he gets totally snarky and snaps "Can you walk any slower? God!" Now, I personally hate getting stuck behind slow people, but a simple and polite 'excuse me' works just as well. I also am not used to rude people. I also have a bad temper. I start telling him off, about how he could ask politely, and I would move, no problem, didn't have to be rude, etc. My brother then feels the need to step in, because he isn't impressed either. "Yeah, nice hat, HATMAN!! Why don't you go get some more hats!"
We so lost that battle. And we both swore to never mention the incident again.
User Reviews
Submitted by Anansie (user info) at 2007-08-13 11:16:09 EDT (#)
Ranking: 1
Your mom goes to college.
Submitted by scourge (user info) at 2007-08-13 11:04:15 EDT (#)
Ranking: -1
ummm...are you trying to sleep with this chick or something, brdn?
this post was shite.
Submitted by Brdn_Nkd (user info) at 2007-08-13 10:41:54 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
nunna nunna nunna nunna nunna nunna nunna nunna HATMAN!
Submitted by rad1101 (user info) at 2006-06-08 05:58:49 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
Submitted by rad1101 (user info) at 2004-09-20 05:36:14 (#)
Ranking: 2
nice
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OMG EARLY RAD1101 REVIEW SIGHTING.
Submitted by MrSparkle847 (user info) at 2006-04-16 00:13:18 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
+2 for "snarky" (which I have never heard of before) and your brother's comeback.
Submitted by forthewin (user info) at 2006-04-16 00:07:41 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
hahahaha
Submitted by doctorj24 (user info) at 2005-08-05 11:41:10 EDT (#)
Ranking: 1
Funny! But not worthy of the almighty +2.
Submitted by whiskey_jack (user info) at 2005-07-19 02:58:10 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
This was kinda creepy. This sounds just like something I would say. What a burn.
Submitted by rad1101 (user info) at 2005-02-26 02:14:11 EST (#)
Ranking: 2
B@W
Submitted by TimeCop (user info) at 2005-01-04 02:43:51 EST (#)
Ranking: 2
"Hatman" is the new "asshole."
Just thought everyone should know...
Submitted by sparkle_pink (user info) at 2004-12-30 11:21:41 EST (#)
Ranking: 0
Submitted by HatMan (user info) at 2004-12-30 05:36:30 (#)
Ranking: 2
Wow. Just wow. I was using this name before this post came out. I feel...weird.
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Actually, your name inspired me to post. Just letting you know.
Submitted by HatMan (user info) at 2004-12-30 05:36:30 EST (#)
Ranking: 2
Wow. Just wow. I was using this name before this post came out. I feel...weird.
Submitted by Jo_of_the_golden_P (user info) at 2004-11-24 01:57:27 EST (#)
Ranking: 2
That was damn funny
Submitted by G_Nonny (user info) at 2004-11-24 01:49:37 EST (#)
Ranking: 2
Best comeback ever.
It's one to be proud of.
Submitted by BlinkSparky (user info) at 2004-10-24 06:09:37 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
Submitted by BridgetJones (user info) at 2004-10-17 02:07:35 (#)
Ranking: 2
Hee hee. Good call. Brothers - don't you just wish you could bury them sometimes?
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Hey slut, even if u did bury me i'd dig myself out kill bill stlye and knock u the fuck out
+2 for the hat comment
Submitted by Lyric (user info) at 2004-10-24 05:46:42 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
Okay, this was fucking funny if only because my little brother used to insult me like that.
I used to have pink hair in high school. He'd get mad at me and yell, "Why don't you go dye your hair pink?!"
Er.... yeah. Good one, bro.
He's all grown up now. Feel free to read my post entitled "Flapping Junk and Funky Leg Tricks" (I think) for a sibling story of my own.
Submitted by Tigre (user info) at 2004-10-23 01:39:40 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
Not gold..
not quite silver..
..poor quality pewter..Maybe.
+2 for the hat thing. Hilarious.
Submitted by darko (user info) at 2004-10-18 03:02:51 EDT (#)
Ranking: 1
but here's a plus one for a good story
Submitted by darko (user info) at 2004-10-18 03:02:29 EDT (#)
Ranking: -2
"And we both swore to never mention the incident again."
Breaking a swear you made with your brother? negative 2
Submitted by cigar (user info) at 2004-10-18 02:52:12 EDT (#)
Ranking: 1
No Comment
Submitted by sarcasm101 (user info) at 2004-10-17 02:37:24 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
Hatman must be crying in his home right now
Submitted by Lady_in_the_radiator (user info) at 2004-10-17 02:18:53 EDT (#)
Ranking: 0
"I spilled your plywood on the vodka... I need a napkin."
"You're a napkin!!!"
Submitted by Banga3386 (user info) at 2004-10-17 02:17:57 EDT (#)
Ranking: 1
This was worth reading because i've said something equally stupid before but this was golden:
"Yeah, nice hat, HATMAN!! Why don't you go get some more hats!"
classic. it was like finding a quarter in a massive, steaming pile of shit.
I'm gonna use that a lot, preferrably in situations where "oh thats cool" is warranted.
Submitted by BridgetJones (user info) at 2004-10-17 02:07:35 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
Hee hee. Good call. Brothers - don't you just wish you could bury them sometimes?
Submitted by Istaros (user info) at 2004-10-14 00:41:18 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
hahahaha....
Submitted by Pwnzor (user info) at 2004-10-14 00:19:56 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
Hatman got PWNED!!
Submitted by icarus9mm (user info) at 2004-10-10 01:34:52 EDT (#)
Ranking: 1
"Yeah, nice hat, HATMAN!! Why don't you go get some more hats!"
classic. it was like finding a quarter in a massive, steaming pile of shit.
Submitted by sparkle_pink (user info) at 2004-10-10 01:20:37 EDT (#)
Ranking: 0
Learn how to type before you injure yourself.
Submitted by Allyson (user info) at 2004-10-10 01:04:04 EDT (#)
Ranking: -2
learn how to write, before you injure youreslf.
Submitted by Zoidberg (user info) at 2004-09-21 12:26:16 EDT (#)
Ranking: 1
No Comment
Submitted by sparkle_pink (user info) at 2004-09-20 17:30:21 EDT (#)
Ranking: 0
Yes, I am a loser. There's no denying that.
Submitted by causeican (user info) at 2004-09-20 14:03:34 EDT (#)
Ranking: -2
loser
Submitted by mrwolf (user info) at 2004-09-20 06:02:59 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
I wasn't impressed until the end. Why don't you go get some more hats was hilarious
Submitted by Soley_Trinity (user info) at 2004-09-20 05:39:41 EDT (#)
Ranking: 1
"Nice hat, HATMAN" made me smile
Submitted by rad1101 (user info) at 2004-09-20 05:36:14 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
nice
Submitted by Method (user info) at 2004-09-20 05:12:09 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
No Comment
Submitted by munkeypants (user info) at 2004-09-19 19:01:44 EDT (#)
Ranking: 1
No Comment
Submitted by EchoBoxing (user info) at 2004-09-19 13:00:47 EDT (#)
Ranking: 1
i called someone a towel
Submitted by Fartman (user info) at 2004-09-19 10:24:16 EDT (#)
Ranking: -2
Yer brudda's a wankah.
Submitted by Random Joe at 2004-09-19 09:35:44 EDT (#)
Ranking: 0
Son, this is the only time I'm ever gonna say this. It is not okay to
lose.
-- Homer Simpson
Dead Putting Society
Submitted by tuesdaydelay (user info) at 2004-09-19 09:17:32 EDT (#)
Ranking: 1
No Comment
Submitted by Stin (user info) at 2004-09-19 08:42:40 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
HATMAN.
Bwahahahaha
Submitted by filmgeek (user info) at 2004-09-19 08:34:09 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
No Comment
Submitted by krootons (user info) at 2004-09-19 04:57:23 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
Hehe. I laughed.
Submitted by Avals (user info) at 2004-09-19 04:05:24 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
GO HATMAN WOO!
Submitted by Falco (user info) at 2004-09-19 03:56:29 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
Im pretty sure your brother owned that guy!
Submitted by Disektor (user info) at 2004-09-19 03:48:26 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
I wandered off and forgot which post I was rating.
+2 I suppose.
Submitted by nakedguitarist (user info) at 2004-09-19 03:38:00 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
+2 because there's that point in your life where you just say the shittest comeback ever. too true.