How I Pupated into a Beautiful Butterfly (366 hits)
Category: NoneRating: 0.25 on 4 reviews (Rate this item) (V)
Submitted by Mentor <<Once upon a time I was a turtle, too>> (View user info) at 2004-09-24 22:36:15 EDT
A little background about me. I usually wear black and sometimes neon colors that remind people of the late '80s, early '90s with a flair of modernism mixed in. I'm very creative with what I wear, and people usually compliment me about it before they call me a "freak" behind my back. It doesn't help that I wear my rainbow arm band just to avoid answering the same goddamned question every ten minutes in the halls of my shit-filled high school. But, to make a background story short, I am usually sticking out like a sore thumb at any school function. This makes me happy. Sugar also makes me happy, but that's an unrelated topic.
Anyway, this morning, I was going through my clothes and trying to decide what was clean and what wasn't. I never put anything away, so it's just a pile of clean and a pile of unclean. But because my room is generally messy anyway, the two piles more often than not get mixed together into an untidy heap of clothes that I may or may not have worn previously. So, I picked out a shirt that did NOT smell (too bad), and was very pleased to be sure that I had not worn it yet this week. So I grabbed a pair of pants and an overshirt, my arm bands, and raced to the bathroom.
I got my shower, brushed my teeth, did my hair, put my clothes on, put my arm bands on, and slipped into my sandals. I figured "Hell...it's Friday. Let's pretend I'm the zodiac killer." (He murdered a few women on the beach, just in case you missed the connection) At any rate, I did not realize what I had done. My "Argentina" shirt is white and sky blue. My overshirt was lighter blue. My pants were coffee-colored (with cream) pocket pants. You know, the ones with zillions of pockets all over them? And to top it all off, I had zipped off my pant legs and I now looked like a beach-comber.
It wasn't too bad...people said I looked nice. But it was a hesitant sort of "nice". As if they were afraid of enraging the pent-up turtle within. I enjoyed this new-found terror that I could inspire in people just by dressing "nice" for once. However, this was all to change at lunch.
A freshman decided that while I was eating my bagel in peace with my friends (2 goth, 1 punk, 1 jock, 1 dumbass) was a good time to give me shit about the fact that I prefer to hug and kiss and have sex with other people who happen to have penises. (Yes I'm gay you idiots who can't figure it out from that passage above)
But I was feeling jovial and decided not to hurt him too bad. As he continued hitting my head, I stood up (nearly two feet taller than him) and climbed up on the table. I went into the classic "crane" position, screamed "All hail, Ye Yertle the Turtle!" and kicked him in the face.
That did NOT go over well. Long story short, there is now an understanding at my school.
"The faggots will always beat your ass, in more ways than one."
User Reviews
Submitted by Zoidberg (user info) at 2004-10-05 03:59:53 EDT (#)
Ranking: 0
huh a new uberhomo?
wonder how long you'll last. its just whataefag and I now. Murphy has disappeared and hair only counted for half
Submitted by Nobb (user info) at 2004-09-25 06:56:13 EDT (#)
Ranking: 0
Fuck this bitch hoe!
Submitted by matchstickman (user info) at 2004-09-25 01:40:17 EDT (#)
Ranking: 1
fabulous.
and yes, i did snap
Submitted by I_Have_a_Kristen_Fetish (user info) at 2004-09-24 22:40:23 EDT (#)
Ranking: 0
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