The Promise - Part 2 (834 hits)
Category: NoneRating: 1.78 on 19 reviews (Rate this item) (V)
Submitted by Julia (View user info) at 2004-09-29 15:00:18 EDT
For Part 1 - "The Deal" - http://www.ubersite.com/m/46415
Part 2 - "The Details"
Michael awoke, disoriented. The room was dark and silent, the bed was soft, and for a few moments he had no idea where he was. For an instant he was in his old apartment again, waking from distressing dreams of wandering through the fog, being followed by a tall man with the black eyes of a nightmare.
That's not my clock, Michael thought, puzzled. That's not my lamp. And then his eyes widened with the memory of the day before. The man was real, he had offered Michael a job, and today he wanted an answer.
No way was he going to do it. Michael told himself this as he took a hot shower, his third since checking into the Best Western the night before. He said it aloud as he dressed himself in the heavy jeans and sweatshirt he had bought from Goodwill. No way. No. Michael brushed his teeth and shaved. Never. He'd go have his free continental breakfast, pocket some muffins and go tell the man so. Absolutely not. He waited for the elevator to take him to his orange juice and coffee.
The elevator doors opened, and the man was waiting inside. Of course he was. "Good morning, Michael," he said, just as he had the day before. He was dressed in the same black suit and alpaca overcoat, but with a red scarf wound around his throat, and he carried a newspaper under his arm. "Let's go to breakfast."
"I'm not working for you," Michael said flatly.
The man smiled broadly, but his eyes looked mildly surprised. "We're going to breakfast, and you can tell me all about your decision." When Michael remained motionless, the man said, "Get in the elevator, and let's go have breakfast." His tone was not unfriendly, but Michael recognized the command.
The elevator took them downstairs, but the lobby was different. Elegant. This wasn't the polished, hopeful shabbiness of the Best Western. "I like the Four Seasons for breakfast," said the man. "Nothing compares to the Eggs Benedict here." A hostess seated them at a table in the corner.
"I'm not working for you," Michael said again.
"Yes, that's what you said. Tell me why, please." The man nodded to a waitress's offer of coffee. "I thought you'd jump at the offer. Seven years of selfishness, and I pay you. You're a fairly selfish person already, after all, and having money would be a nice change, don't you think?"
"It's a trick."
The man stirred cream into his coffee and raised an eyebrow. "Oh? What's the trick? I already told you I never lie."
"You could be lying now," replied Michael, as the waitress walked away. He was no closer to solving the conundrum, even after picking at it for hours the day before. "The answer is no."
"Tell me why you think it's a trick."
"Well," Michael fumbled. "Almost anything I'd buy has sales tax attached, and some of that goes to--to--to public good," he said lamely. "And I'd have to pay income tax, or I'd end up in jail."
The other eyebrow went up. "Paying taxes is being selfless? That's more of an obligation, wouldn't you say?"
Michael thought about it. "I guess."
"Is that it?"
"I think I'd spend seven years ruining my soul, and then--" The man held up a hand, as the waitress was back. He ordered Eggs Benedict for them both. As soon as the young woman was out of earshot, Michael leaned forward. "Then you'd kill me and get it anyway."
"Now that's a good objection. Would it help if I promised not to cause anything to happen to you? I mean, I can't do anything if you decided to take a stroll on the railroad tracks, but I'm not going to bring any harm to you, Michael."
"Still, at the end of seven years, or if something happens, I'm screwed. What if I had a heart attack or got hit by a bus?"
"All right. I also promise that if you die before the seven years are up, you'll have the chance to repent." The man took a sip of coffee and wiped his mouth.
"Repent?"
"Of course. Be sincerely sorry, and you're forgiven."
Michael thought about this. "But what if I'm not sincerely sorry?"
"Do you think you wouldn't be, Michael?" Michael was quiet for a long time. Two steaming plates of food arrived. "I think our negotiations are going very well, don't you?" asked the man. He cut into his eggs.
"We're not negotiating," Michael retorted.
"No? You've begun to tell me your terms, and I've agreed to them. I thought we'd talk about your salary next." The man looked at Michael's untouched plate. "Eat, eat."
"You said yesterday I'd have all the money I wanted. An infinite amount of money . . . I know that's a trap."
"Would you want an infinite amount of money?" The man wiped his mouth again. "It doesn't sound like you do."
Michael considered it. "No, I wouldn't."
"Good, because that's a silly wish. It would ruin the world economy. You could have it if you wanted, because I never lie, but I knew you were more intelligent than that." The man paused to eat a slice of cantaloupe. "So what salary would you demand?" Michael shook his head. "One thousand dollars a day, perhaps?"
"A thousand dollars a day for seven years. To be selfish."
"Yes. No giving to charities, no spending money on gifts, no scholarships to needy families." The man shuddered slightly. "One thousand dollars a day for seven years, including two leap years, is $2,557,000. You are free to do all the good you wish after you are free again."
"Two-and-a-half million dollars? For my soul? That's it?"
The man's smile was expansive. "Now we're talking."
"Look, I haven't said yes yet, but I think if I have to live for seven years risking my soul to eternal damnation, I should get something more like--" Seeing the gleam in the man's eyes, Michael bit back what he was about to say. Instead, he said, "Ten million dollars."
"Done." The man was pleased. "We have a deal, then."
"I didn't say that. I still don't know how to--to stay selfish all the time."
"You're on the right track, Michael. Did you thank the waitress for bringing our food? Did you smile at the hostess when she said hello?"
Stunned, Michael argued, "I was distracted. By you. But isn't just eating here a little selfless? That waitress will get a tip because we're here, because I agreed to come with you."
"Surely you're not suggesting that either one of us is being generous by eating breakfast at the Four Seasons. We're here for the Eggs Benedict."
"But what if I gave the waitress a huge tip?"
"That would depend. Would you give it to her because you want her phone number or because you're trying to be kind?"
Michael shook his head. This all sounded too tempting, too easy. "What if I accidentally did something kind? You know, if I smiled at someone on the way out, or held the door open for some old lady? I don't know if I could remember all the time."
"Constance is the key to getting what you want, Michael." With that, he gestured to the woman standing beside him. A middle-aged woman in a tidy blue dress. "This is Constance."
User Reviews
Submitted by BLITZKREIG_BOB (user info) at 2004-10-08 12:07:19 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
Reads like watching a movie. Needs some action for my likings...or to fit into the story a lack of action, if you know what I mean.
Submitted by electrictoothsyndrome (user info) at 2004-10-08 01:13:48 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
Ok, it's 12:07 and it's not here.
Submitted by electrictoothsyndrome (user info) at 2004-10-07 16:02:49 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
Julia....where is it? You promised! *puts on his best defeated child's face and slouches*
Submitted by electrictoothsyndrome (user info) at 2004-10-07 00:24:03 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
Who DOESN'T know it's 'bated'?
ooooo...all CAPS....ooooo
;)
Submitted by Julia (user info) at 2004-10-07 00:14:34 EDT (#)
Ranking: 0
You're just showing off that you know it's not "baited." Now I forgive you about the Sunshine song.
Submitted by electrictoothsyndrome (user info) at 2004-10-07 00:07:12 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
I'll be waiting for it with bated breath.
Submitted by Julia (user info) at 2004-10-06 23:45:58 EDT (#)
Ranking: 0
Sorry guys! I was in California for a few days. Part 3 will be up tomorrow.
Submitted by electrictoothsyndrome (user info) at 2004-10-06 14:23:05 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
HAHA! That link is awesome! I wanna play now!
Submitted by drfeggphd (user info) at 2004-10-05 15:53:17 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
ETS, you are obviously unaware of the interesting history behind crumpets.
Briefly: long ago, after the ergot-infested rye was harvested and made into
snacks of various kinds, the villagers would, after they had afternoon tea,
run around in the recently harvested fields and crumpet each other enthusiastically
with sticks. Eventually, certain rules evolved to help make crumpets more formal,
safe and fun for the whole family. Here is a link to more information:
http://www.fieldcrumpets.com/newbies.html
Submitted by electrictoothsyndrome (user info) at 2004-10-05 15:21:20 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
I want you to tell me the rest of the story. If you ask real nice, I might even let you whisper it to me over tea and crumpets (whatever they are).
Submitted by drfeggphd (user info) at 2004-10-05 08:10:39 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
[theme from Final Jeopardy playing endlessly in Fegg's brain] he wonders
as he waits so patiently, where in the blazes of tarnation is the next
chapter of this danged ol' story, anyway?
Submitted by electrictoothsyndrome (user info) at 2004-10-01 12:47:11 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
Submitted by munkeypants (user info) at 2004-10-01 00:12:13 (#)
Ranking: 2
so i sing the song of love for
juuuuuuulia
---------------------------
:) Half of what I say is meaningless...
Submitted by munkeypants (user info) at 2004-10-01 00:12:13 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
so i sing the song of love for
juuuuuuulia
Submitted by electrictoothsyndrome (user info) at 2004-09-29 19:46:27 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
This is very very good, and I am with Badlands on the even pace... You writing is so easy to read, it practically reads itself.
I really don't want to risk possibly fucking up your ending, but there is a philosophical loophole that Michael can use to his advantage...I just wonder if he will...
Very cool Scratch character. I like his style!
Submitted by Supreme_Overlord (user info) at 2004-09-29 18:09:53 EDT (#)
Ranking: 0
I hope he gets to have wild monkey sex with Constance!
Submitted by MyNameIsTim (user info) at 2004-09-29 17:39:08 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
No Comment
Submitted by Badlands (user info) at 2004-09-29 15:59:26 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
I'm really enjoying this story, Julia. You tell a story with such a nice even pace and such a natural flow. So refreshing.
Submitted by Monarch (user info) at 2004-09-29 15:56:07 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
Good so far.
Submitted by AshK (user info) at 2004-09-29 15:53:41 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
I am enjoying this! Good job.