Saucer Nazis are Stealing My Mail (608 hits)
Category: HumorRating: 1 on 9 reviews (Rate this item) (V)
Submitted by Sekeeth (View user info) at 2004-10-01 20:48:04 EDT
I know I shouldnt be writing this, as I am only going to feel more of their wrath. Im writing this under the Humor section in hopes that they will not notice, or believe that enough people will think it is a joke. But I must warn others.
The backstory is that in the late 1930s and early 1940s Adolf Hitler sent several expeditions to the North Pole. None of the expeditions were ever seen or heard from again. The average person who hears such information would assume the bastards just froze to death like they deserve to.
That is not the case. It is my belief that the Nazi bastards actually found the hole to get into the center of the earth. After finding the hole to the center of the Earth, the group tried to go back to Germany to explain the incredible finding, but unfortunately the boat that got them to the drop off had just left.
The group had exhausted most of the resources that they had with them to get to the boat and were in great danger of both starving and freezing to death in the desolate wasteland. As they treked back to the hole, feeling very righfully abandoned, decided to create their own society.
The newly abandoned Nazis had great difficulty gathering certain resources in the center of the earth but found an abundance of others. Ores and metals being one of the abundances. As time went by, the colony became desparate for certain resources and contact with the outside world.
They decided it would be wise to create flying craft since it is very difficult to traverse the frozen lands to and from their home. This new means of transportation was developed by them around the early 1950s. Is it shocking that this is when the first UFOs were spotted?
With their new means of transportation, the Saucer Nazis now were able to get the resources they so desparately yearned for. But the problem was the outside contact. They very well couldnt just drop down anywhere and talk to people since they felt they were shunned. So they decided to start taking written correspondance. After a while, the outside world started to catch on to the missing mail.
This is why the United States postal service no longer delivers mail on Sundays (that was their prime mail-harvest day). Now the Saucer Nazis just find certain individuals with juicy mail for them to take.
Please, tell others. I fear I dont have much time left. The other day I actually saw one of them taking my mail out of my mailbox. She didnt see me, but I am now constantly being watched. I think that soon I will be abducted. Help m
User Reviews
Submitted by I_Have_a_Kristen_Fetish (user info) at 2004-10-06 23:03:13 EDT (#)
Ranking: -2
Watch this space.
Submitted by cigar (user info) at 2004-10-02 00:08:30 EDT (#)
Ranking: -1
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Submitted by Sekeeth (user info) at 2004-10-01 21:07:56 (#)
Ranking: 0
Oh, sorry. The average person has a reading level of about a 3rd or 4th grader. I was just keeping it simple. Next time Ill use my $10 words I've bought. :)
DETROIT ROCKS
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decent at best, and you don't take critism worth a fuck.
Submitted by Nobb (user info) at 2004-10-01 23:47:13 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
No Comment
Submitted by Pacifist248 (user info) at 2004-10-01 22:16:53 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
Hahaha. I love the, "help m".
Submitted by LadyPlural (user info) at 2004-10-01 21:17:27 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
It wasn't so much the words used as it was the lack of apostrophes. Go to this site- it will help you out, I promise.
http://www.apostrophe.fsnet.co.uk/
No, really, it isn't anything bad.
Submitted by Sekeeth (user info) at 2004-10-01 21:07:56 EDT (#)
Ranking: 0
Oh, sorry. The average person has a reading level of about a 3rd or 4th grader. I was just keeping it simple. Next time Ill use my $10 words I've bought. :)
DETROIT ROCKS
Submitted by gibberish (user info) at 2004-10-01 21:07:30 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
Just for the title.
Submitted by LadyPlural (user info) at 2004-10-01 21:04:06 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
Not very well written, but it made me laugh.
Submitted by comicbookguy (user info) at 2004-10-01 20:53:43 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
No Comment