I'll Miss You, Sebastian (1855 hits)
Category: Movies & TVRating: 1.11 on 14 reviews (Rate this item) (V)
Submitted by Blitzen (View user info) at 2004-10-07 00:26:28 EDT
This is probably the longest post I've written, so if you have the patience to read it all, I thank you. Enjoy
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As a young girl, I remember fondly having crushes on certain boys. I had kind of a thing for the "brave" type. The boy I could picture beating up anyone who called me a name or threw dirt at me. I especially was fond of the light hair - blue eyes type... Why? I have no idea. I'm certainly not drawn to that 13 years later.
I recall very vaguely seeing and enjoying The Neverending Story when I was young. I couldn't have hated it... because in 1991, when The Neverending Story 2 came out, I insisted that I see it. I had no idea what kind of effect that movie would have on my life... or how it would all come crashing down one September evening.
His name in the movie was Sebastian. I had no idea what the actor's real name was, I didn't care too much either. He was the man (or boy, rather) of my dreams. All I knew was that he was the only one who could save Fantasia and the Childlike Empress... or something (shit, it was 13 years ago... give me a break) and I wanted him to save me. I would always wish that he would just come running in, take me by the arm and we'd go play Nintendo. Still I had no idea who this boy was and it seemed my friends didn't know of him either... plus they didn't have this obsession with him.
Some time later, I find out that his name is Johnathan Brandis and as far as I'm concerned he hasn't been in any entertaining movies lately. Then a little movie comes along called Ladybugs starring the late Rodney Dangerfield. I won't go into plot details because I realize now it was a terrible terrible movie. But in this movie, my dream man has a love interest. I hated that bitch so much. He tried so hard to get her attention without letting on that he was really a guy... only I knew the truth.
I won't bore you with the details of my many years of infatuation with this Johnathan Brandis, but I'll just say I was "involved" (I wouldn't really call it a relationship when you're in grade 4... it was more of an "on-again off-again", "let's hold hands on the playground" thing) with a boy who bore a striking resemblance to Mr. Brandis for a couple years... was it a coincidence that he looked liked my studmuffin of the movies? Yes, probably.
But moving on, I went for a few years admiring Johnathan, trying to follow him through his movie "career" and watched as he started on the series Seaquest. My interest in Johnathan Brandis had been fading slowly with the introduction of various other heartthrobs such as that kid who played Hobie on Baywatch and my taste in boys was slowly shifting from fair-haired "pretty" boys to dark-haired young men.
As I became a bit older, I became interested in the real "men" of TV and movies and soon Johnathan was nearly forgotten. Every once in a while I'd catch a bit of Ladybugs or The Neverending Story 2 on television and remember how much I adored him, but that wasn't enough for me to keep watching the movie- he wasn't part of my life anymore.
Many years passed and I grew and matured into the woman I am today. Up until about a month or so ago, I was living the life. I had a part-time job, just started a new year at university, was going to parties and everything. Then at one party something happened. Something that would have made me cry had I not been nicely buzzed at the time.
Johnathan Brandis had killed himself a year ago.
We got talking about Seaquest and I had to let everyone in on how I had a huge crush on Johnathan Brandis for quite some time as a young girl. Then someone mentioned the awful news. I had to sit down. It was like someone had just told me the movie star I adored when I was a child had died... wait, it was exactly that.
My first question was why. Why would a child star kill- oh right. Nevermind. Silly question. My second, more logical question was WHERE THE FUCK WAS I?? I claimed I was this fan of his. I had a small, harmless obsession when I was a young girl and now he kills himself and I don't even know about it.
So that was it. I stopped paying attention to him and he dies. I had taken advantage of him. Thinking he would always be there, doing some horrible movie or TV series. Johnathan Brandis dies at age 27.
And this is my tribute to him.
You'll always have a place in my heart, Sebastian.
http://edition.cnn.com/2003/SHOWBIZ/Movies/11/25/actors.death.ap/index.html
-Blitzen
User Reviews
Submitted by c1ndy (user info) at 2005-06-20 08:46:03 EDT (#)
Ranking: 1
No Comment
Submitted by Angel not in the know at 2004-10-19 13:07:09 EDT (#)
Ranking: 1
unfortunately i can relate.... just today i decided to 'check up on' this cutie to see where he was in his carreer, and don't i find out that he's dead. doesn't he realise that he was somebody? what a waste.
Submitted by Blitzen (user info) at 2004-10-07 12:43:45 EDT (#)
Ranking: 0
WTF I'M NOT READING ALL THAT
i had chopped this post down to avoid rambling on about things.. maybe i should have kept it the 2 or 3 pages it originally was
Submitted by apollo88 (user info) at 2004-10-07 11:05:52 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
was seaquest the one with the dolphin ?
not flipper.
Submitted by Pentameter (user info) at 2004-10-07 09:07:00 EDT (#)
Ranking: 1
I agree with whoever said you should have expanded this more.
This was a very good idea for a post.
Submitted by Supreme_Overlord (user info) at 2004-10-07 07:32:11 EDT (#)
Ranking: 0
too bad, another talentless actor dies young
Submitted by DonkeyOnTheEdge (user info) at 2004-10-07 02:24:18 EDT (#)
Ranking: 1
I wish the old man was my dad.
Submitted by Lyric (user info) at 2004-10-07 00:50:47 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
I liked this. It was an ejoyable read. Oh, and I'm biased, because I used to love Jonathan Brandis, too.
About a month before he killed himself, I thought of him (and my old infatuation) for whatever reason, and I decided that I was going to write him a letter. I figured he didn't get too many "fan" letters now and would appreciate it. Or, at the very least, laugh at the dorky 20-something woman writing him so many years later.
I never did get around to it, and then I find out he died a month later.
What an odd world.
Submitted by heightzguy (user info) at 2004-10-07 00:38:14 EDT (#)
Ranking: 1
I bet that movie "Ladybugs" screwed him up. I know I wanted to kill myself after I watched it.
Submitted by lux78 (user info) at 2004-10-07 00:37:18 EDT (#)
Ranking: 1
Aint that the shit.
Good idea, elaborate more, add details.
Submitted by Larry <Larry.at.yahoo.com> at 2004-10-07 00:35:48 EDT (#)
Ranking: 1
That sucks. I liked Sea Quest, I still remeber the theme song. La la la la la La la la La la la laaaa.
Submitted by FunnyAsCancer (user info) at 2004-10-07 00:31:52 EDT (#)
Ranking: 1
It was well written, so you get the +1.
Go Atreyu!
Submitted by Bush Rockz at 2004-10-07 00:31:34 EDT (#)
Ranking: -2
Fucking lame ass
Submitted by cigar (user info) at 2004-10-07 00:31:28 EDT (#)
Ranking: 1
No Comment