Why the fuck not... (540 hits)
Category: Humor -> Dumb JobsRating: 1.2 on 12 reviews (Rate this item) (V)
Submitted by <james_english_771.at.hotmail.com> (View user info) at 2004-10-15 16:05:32 EDT
I'm not a story and I'm sorry but bear with me...
2 yrs ago, I started my new job as Night Janitor at a truck stop. Yes, I know. Crappy job at a crappy place. Anyhoo, part of my job was operating the floor waxer which is really a smaller version of a Zamboni machine without the seat. If any of you have used one of these, you know what I mean. If you haven't, there's an opening on top of the machine to pour the soap in. Anyway, the day shift runs it once and the night shift runs it again, once everyone has gone home. So, there I was at 4 in the morning, unsupervised (which isn't good for me, I have ADHD, I think) drinking my litre of Coke. I decided to fuck with the day shift and mix the rest of my carbonated beverage with the indusrtial strength soap and pour the mixture into the machine.
When the day shift showed up to "relieve" my position, I told buddy to watch the floor waxer as it was acting up.
"I used it last night and it barely spit any soap out onto the floor. You have to crank itup all the way before you turn it on and it should work fine."
Around 1 o'clock in the afternoon, my boss called me in saying there was a problem at work so I headed in with a bit of a concealed smile behind my face. I found my boss but wasn't able to find buddy who should have been working. Well, to make a long story short, buddy cranked the machine up and turned it on. It turns out that when the machine started at full force, it took off spewing caffinated soap all over the place and buddy slipped in the mess. He dislocated his shoulder from the impact and gashed his head open. I didn't think it was that funny till I saw the security camera footage and there he was, crying like a bitch laying in a puddle of nasty liquid that, apparently, one of the truckers slipped in as well and spilled his coffee on himself. Needless to say, I got fired and the trucker sued the company.
User Reviews
Submitted by BridgetJones (user info) at 2004-10-16 02:11:21 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
Hee hee, you stupid arse. I hope you find a new job soon.
Submitted by BlinkSparky (user info) at 2004-10-16 01:54:41 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
i laughed automatic plus 2
Submitted by mandinga (user info) at 2004-10-16 01:34:47 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
excellent, fuck that job
Submitted by Insanethemind (user info) at 2004-10-15 17:51:35 EDT (#)
Ranking: 1
brought a smile to my face.
we are both, sadly, horrible bastards.
Submitted by Sekeeth (user info) at 2004-10-15 17:48:59 EDT (#)
Ranking: 0
"Anyhoo" ... Ouch, man. That hurt. Are you a 13 year old girl? -2 for that slop.
+2 for inflicting head wounds on co-workers.
Here's your 0.
Submitted by jumpinjellyfish (user info) at 2004-10-15 17:36:06 EDT (#)
Ranking: 1
Not bad
Submitted by Mitchell at 2004-10-15 16:30:09 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
Sly Bastard...
Submitted by Shlongy (user info) at 2004-10-15 16:28:55 EDT (#)
Ranking: 0
I can't decide.
Submitted by UBERDOOBIE (user info) at 2004-10-15 16:19:37 EDT (#)
Ranking: 0
And the top should read "I'm not a story TELLER...", sorry.
Submitted by lordofduct (user info) at 2004-10-15 16:14:50 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
HEE HEE HEE!
mischevious lil' bugger aren't ya. My kinda man, shoulda sprayed the security camera first though. Oh and hey, its your buddies fucking fault for slipping, dumb bastard don't know how to walk on wet floors.
Submitted by zakalwe (user info) at 2004-10-15 16:13:42 EDT (#)
Ranking: 0
Post multiple times in a short interval and earlier posts disappear.
Post shit everytime and people will hate you.
Doing yourself no favours here.
Submitted by BLITZKREIG_BOB (user info) at 2004-10-15 16:13:10 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
Why am I laughing at this? People got hurt.
Oh right, it's funny.