I was accosted by a giant red Skittle (27074 hits)
Category: RomanceRating: 1.91 on 131 reviews (Rate this item) (V)
Submitted by Method (View user info) at 2004-10-19 00:57:50 EDT
Halloween.
1999.
Trick or Treat, bitches.
The four of us, my girl and I, and my best friend and his girl decided to hit up Salem, Massachusetts for Halloween for lack of something better to do. Rumor had it that it was just like Mardi Gras, sans the alcohol poisoning, the bared breasts, and the overwhelming debauchery that went on.
I must admit, it was alot of fun. Hundreds upon thousands (well, hundreds anyway) of people lining the streets in full costume, and people WERE getting drunk and just having a good time. My girlfriend, being the lazy broad that she was, just painted some fucking cat whiskers on her face and wore a black leotard. My friend got decked out in some sort of queer medieval outfit, complete with genuine broad sword. If it wasn't for the sword, he would have looked like a total fag with his puffy pants. His saving grace was that he had bought a very tight serving wench outfit for his girl, and her tits managed to pop out several times during the weekend.
He had also bought me a giant broad sword, a long black hooded cape, and drew up an amazing design on my face in black and red paint. I suppose I'm a hypocritical asshole, because I was just as lazy as my girl. I was decked out in all black too.
But I digress. We shopped, we went to haunted houses, it was as fun as a queer night in Salem could get. We stopped into a pizzeria to get something to eat,ordered and sat down at a table with four seats. When the pizza was ready, my friend got up to get it, and the next thing I knew, someone had taken his seat.
A giant green M&M. This Chinese girl had just plopped into my friends seat, without asking anyone whether it was ok. Now, this was a separate table, with bench seats on either side, so it wasn't as if she was just sitting near us. She was sitting WITH us. I wasn't quite sure what she was thinking.
I stared at her for a moment in disbelief, not trying to be my usual, extremely rude self, as I wasn't quite sure about the rules of engagement in a foreign land when it came to candy people.
"Excuse me Miss, my friend is sitting there."
"Ok" she said to me, turning around and looking out the window.
"Umm, hello, can't you sit at that table right behind us?" I said incredulously.
"I wait for friend" She said, in her broken English.
Unbelievable.
This is when my girl's mouth opened. When she was pissed off, you didn't want to be within three miles of the blast zone. The plague of verbal locusts that spewed forth from her mouth from time to time was enough to scatter the Four Horsemen of the Apocalypse to the winds.
Did I mention she was a loudmouth Italian girl from NY?
Yeah.
"Listen, you fucking dirty gook bitch, get the fuck up out of here, before I break your fucking skull open. Someone's sitting there."
Silence. The Asian M&M had just ignored her. I was the only one that had ever gotten away with that. I braced myself for the impact. I wasn't getting involved. I had never fought with candy before. Especially Asian candy.
"Did you fucking hear me? I said get the fuck up, you stupid bitch"
Again, our newly acquired friend just sat there, looking out the window, ignoring us. I couldn't understand what was going through her head. I wanted to tell her, to warn her, to plead with her to get up before things got out of hand, but I just sat there. I think I was actually enjoying this.
Well, enough was enough. My girl picked up the salt shaker from the table, cocked back, and caught the girl square in the back of the head. I winced.
"AYAAAAAAAAAAA WHY YOU DO THAT" the chinese girl screamed, finally showing some sort of acknowledgement, holding the back of her head.
"Because you dont listen, and you need to get the fuck on up out of here, before you catch the pepper too."
My girl had gotten up, my friend's girl had gotten up, the M&M had gotten up, and my friend was standing there, tray of pizza in hand, trying to figure out what the fuck was going on. I figured I would get up too. No sense in sitting down. This was going to get worse before it got any better.
"WHA GOING ON" I heard from behind me in a thick Asian accent.
Standing in the doorway, bathed in the silver moonlight, was a very tall, very menacing figure.
It was a Skittle. A fucking Red Skittle. Apparently, her boyfriend was also dressed for the occasion.
The girl started yelling at her boyfriend in Chinese, waving her arms about and pointing at us. His face began to turn a shade of red almost as deep as his costume, and he began to walk towards us, his fists clenched. He was big as hell, and he wanted to kill us.
It was go time.
My friend tossed the tray of piping hot pizza at him, and the chinese guy ducked down in a defensive stance, knocking the tray away in mid air, and uttering a loud "KEEEEEAAAAAY" or some shit. I don't know, goddamm Asians are good at karate and math.
The Asian girl ran behind him, and our two girlfriends hid behind us. We just stood there, staring at each other for a moment, wondering what to do next.
I was fighting with an Asian Skittle. I assumed that he could kick my ass, as ridiculous as he looked, seeing as how he knocked the tray out of the air without flinching. He came towards my friend and I, ready to lay some Shaolin shitkicking on our asses, and I did the only thing I could think of.
I drew my 4 foot long broad sword from its sheath from under my cape and brandished it at him......menacingly.
My friend followed suit.
A more ridiculous scene, I could not imagine.
It was a standoff. Some sort of fucked up Halloween standoff.
I wasn't planning on actually stabbing anyone, and neither was my friend, but we had big sharp swords, and goddammit, I was going to use it at least once that weekend.
I moved towards the Skittle, and he backed away, slowly, out the door, a frightened but furious look in his eye. He hadn't expected the crazy white boys to be slinging metal.
Yeah, that's right , Taste the Rainbow, bitch.
He left, muttering under his breath, and we put our weapons away, breathing a sigh of relief.
No blood was to be shed that day.
I turned around, looked at my friends, and just walked out the door. The pizzeria owner was on the phone, most assuredly calling the police, and I didn't feel like getting arrested in fucking Salem.
"What were you arrested for?"
"Well, see this Skittle attacked me, so I drew my sword and defended myself."
Yeah......
The rest of the weekend was spent cautiously looking over my shoulder, expecting a very large, very angry Skittle flying through the air, aiming a crippling Dragon Kick right at me.
My hand was on my sword hilt the entire weekend.
User Reviews
Submitted by Crystle (user info) at 2007-08-13 17:34:04 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
No Comment
Submitted by Pentameter (user info) at 2006-08-31 16:04:37 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
HAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA
Every time I read one of your posts, I hear your voice.
Submitted by compEngineer0 (user info) at 2006-08-09 13:19:55 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
No Comment
Submitted by jen07blue (user info) at 2006-03-28 11:44:38 EST (#)
Ranking: 2
"taste the rainbow, bitch".....enough said...
Submitted by douglar02 (user info) at 2006-01-20 19:36:45 EST (#)
Ranking: 2
LOL excellent read
Submitted by silverstone148 (user info) at 2005-12-23 20:18:00 EST (#)
Ranking: 2
splendiferous
Submitted by Average_Dan (user info) at 2005-11-21 09:10:38 EST (#)
Ranking: 2
Fucking nice Method.
It's a shame your post on "naked pics of my 8 year old daughter" has more hits.
This and the angry hippo post were nucking futz!
And you are as well.
Submitted by MANICMOTHER (user info) at 2005-06-16 18:47:33 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
The plague of verbal locusts
--------
Nice, very nice.
Submitted by Jungle_Jimanee (user info) at 2005-05-05 11:38:31 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
Brilliant.
Submitted by squarepusher (user info) at 2005-02-15 15:51:33 EST (#)
Ranking: 2
Yes....Good diversion from work!!!! Fun read.
Submitted by polyamorousaj (user info) at 2005-01-16 00:25:08 EST (#)
Ranking: 2
How does my B@W post have more than this?
Submitted by metroidkillah (user info) at 2005-01-15 23:53:39 EST (#)
Ranking: 2
Ok, THAT was funny!
Submitted by Mr.JackassFrost (user info) at 2005-01-07 23:13:11 EST (#)
Ranking: 2
classic
Submitted by maiorano84 (user info) at 2004-12-09 15:15:03 EST (#)
Ranking: 2
1st Place
Submitted by Davros (user info) at 2004-11-22 09:16:52 EST (#)
Ranking: 2
"Yeah, that's right , Taste the Rainbow, bitch. "
Fucking Genius.
I call B@W.
Oh wait already there.
Did I say Genius?
Thought so.
-Davros
Submitted by munkeypants (user info) at 2004-11-14 18:54:45 EST (#)
Ranking: 2
congrats on B@W!!!
Submitted by Spam (user info) at 2004-11-12 17:16:30 EST (#)
Ranking: 2
Submitted by youarsoghey (user info) at 2004-11-11 00:31:26 (#)
Ranking: 2
Submitted by 10c7c (user info) at 2004-11-10 22:25:47 (#)
Ranking: -2
----------------------
I have way too much time on my hands
Submitted by 10c7c (user info) at 2004-11-10 22:18:41 EST (#)
Ranking: -2
It's the azn nigga fuck the rest
Dallas to New York jigga, we the best
Vietnam to Japan to Mongolia
Philippines to Taiwan to Cambodia
Korea, ah ah, hometown China
who you got, huh?
you got shit nigga, feel the size
it's the A-Z-N better recognize
got rice, bitch? got rice?
got food, got soup, got spice?
got brains like us? got skills like us?
got cars? got clothes? got girls like us?
wassup we the shit and we kill ya'll fools
we got money in the bank from our family jewels
can we help it if we raid and corrupt the schools?
it don't matter fuck the law shit we break the rules
we jack cars, pop games, yo we got the tools
flip it up, break it down then we shoot some pool,
you fuck with me, you fuck with all bitch, don't think it's cool
one on one fuck that it's three on one no duels
got rice bitch? got rice?
anything you can show that is nice?
got cash,got moves, got thoughts like us?
Fuck no, Hell you white you'll never be like us
Take off your shoes when you enter please
or Crawl around on the floor with your fucking knees
don't mind the smell you'll get used to it
moth balls, fried squid, and that buddha shit
what the hell is that you think i don't see
no forks in the house chops sticks only
have a taste don't be scared try the lemon tea
you don't want thats alright try the fuck on me
Got rice bitch, got rice?
Got luck anytime you roll the dice?
your luck is bad unless you run and hide,
coz we're thugs for life baby, Asian Pride...
It's the azn nigga fuck the rest
Dallas to New York jigga, we the best
Vietnam to Japan to Mongolia
Philippines to Taiwan to Cambodia
Korea, ah ah, hometown China
who you got, huh?
you got shit nigga, feel the size
it's the A-Z-N better recognize
got rice, bitch? got rice?
got food, got soup, got spice?
got brains like us? got skills like us?
got cars? got clothes? got girls like us?
wassup we the shit and we kill ya'll fools
we got money in the bank from our family jewels
can we help it if we raid and corrupt the schools?
it don't matter fuck the law shit we break the rules
we jack cars, pop games, yo we got the tools
flip it up, break it down then we shoot some pool,
you fuck with me, you fuck with all bitch, don't think it's cool
one on one fuck that it's three on one no duels
got rice bitch? got rice?
anything you can show that is nice?
got cash,got moves, got thoughts like us?
Fuck no, Hell you white you'll never be like us
Take off your shoes when you enter please
or Crawl around on the floor with your fucking knees
don't mind the smell you'll get used to it
moth balls, fried squid, and that buddha shit
what the hell is that you think i don't see
no forks in the house chops sticks only
have a taste don't be scared try the lemon tea
you don't want thats alright try the fuck on me
Got rice bitch, got rice?
Got luck anytime you roll the dice?
your luck is bad unless you run and hide,
coz we're thugs for life baby, Asian Pride...
It's the azn nigga fuck the rest
Dallas to New York jigga, we the best
Vietnam to Japan to Mongolia
Philippines to Taiwan to Cambodia
Korea, ah ah, hometown China
who you got, huh?
you got shit nigga, feel the size
it's the A-Z-N better recognize
got rice, bitch? got rice?
got food, got soup, got spice?
got brains like us? got skills like us?
got cars? got clothes? got girls like us?
wassup we the shit and we kill ya'll fools
we got money in the bank from our family jewels
can we help it if we raid and corrupt the schools?
it don't matter fuck the law shit we break the rules
we jack cars, pop games, yo we got the tools
flip it up, break it down then we shoot some pool,
you fuck with me, you fuck with all bitch, don't think it's cool
one on one fuck that it's three on one no duels
got rice bitch? got rice?
anything you can show that is nice?
got cash,got moves, got thoughts like us?
Fuck no, Hell you white you'll never be like us
Take off your shoes when you enter please
or Crawl around on the floor with your fucking knees
don't mind the smell you'll get used to it
moth balls, fried squid, and that buddha shit
what the hell is that you think i don't see
no forks in the house chops sticks only
have a taste don't be scared try the lemon tea
you don't want thats alright try the fuck on me
Got rice bitch, got rice?
Got luck anytime you roll the dice?
your luck is bad unless you run and hide,
coz we're thugs for life baby, Asian Pride...
It's the azn nigga fuck the rest
Dallas to New York jigga, we the best
Vietnam to Japan to Mongolia
Philippines to Taiwan to Cambodia
Korea, ah ah, hometown China
who you got, huh?
you got shit nigga, feel the size
it's the A-Z-N better recognize
got rice, bitch? got rice?
got food, got soup, got spice?
got brains like us? got skills like us?
got cars? got clothes? got girls like us?
wassup we the shit and we kill ya'll fools
we got money in the bank from our family jewels
can we help it if we raid and corrupt the schools?
it don't matter fuck the law shit we break the rules
we jack cars, pop games, yo we got the tools
flip it up, break it down then we shoot some pool,
you fuck with me, you fuck with all bitch, don't think it's cool
one on one fuck that it's three on one no duels
got rice bitch? got rice?
anything you can show that is nice?
got cash,got moves, got thoughts like us?
Fuck no, Hell you white you'll never be like us
Take off your shoes when you enter please
or Crawl around on the floor with your fucking knees
don't mind the smell you'll get used to it
moth balls, fried squid, and that buddha shit
what the hell is that you think i don't see
no forks in the house chops sticks only
have a taste don't be scared try the lemon tea
you don't want thats alright try the fuck on me
Got rice bitch, got rice?
Got luck anytime you roll the dice?
your luck is bad unless you run and hide,
coz we're thugs for life baby, Asian Pride...
Submitted by Logos (user info) at 2004-11-08 18:14:19 EST (#)
Ranking: 2
Yeah, that's right , Taste the Rainbow, bitch...wasn't going to get arrested in Salem...cool.
Submitted by Freight_Train (user info) at 2004-11-08 17:06:07 EST (#)
Ranking: -2
i'll return a favor
Submitted by Mr Meyagi at 2004-11-08 12:47:52 EST (#)
Ranking: 0
That was great,
Submitted by inyane at 2004-11-08 08:59:38 EST (#)
Ranking: 2
"goddamm Asians are good at karate and math"
ahahahaha
that alone deserves a +2.
racist comments are funny. especially when they aren't insulting. i wish i was good at karate and math.
Submitted by spedmonkey (user info) at 2004-11-07 11:26:31 EST (#)
Ranking: 2
Hey, I'm Asian. I think this is hilarious. Lighten up, my fellow chinks.
Submitted by lojope (user info) at 2004-11-07 11:15:44 EST (#)
Ranking: 2
Submitted by Shlongy (user info) at 2004-10-19 11:31:06 (#)
Ranking: 1
Skittles have always seemed to be the toughest and most menacing of all the candy-related costumes.
~*~*~*~*~*~*~
I can't believe I am laughing at a shlongy comment, but I am.
Submitted by The_Grey_Pilgrim (user info) at 2004-11-05 16:40:26 EST (#)
Ranking: 1
How to put this...
To all of you who complained about this story:
It's funny, it probably isn't true, and if you prefer to take offence at this rather than laugh there is something wrong with you.
As for cowards using sword on an unarmed man, well, he was probably more skilled at hand-to-hand than the other guys, they used equalizers, and no one got hurt.
The green costumed one was clearly a jackass in any culture, so you can't use that as an excuse.
I write fiction, I know whereof I speak, and this is a neat comedic gem.
If it true, though, for crying out loud man I hope you're girlfrien doesn't see it, kinda objectifyingness goin' on a small bit.
Submitted by Random Joe at 2004-11-05 14:51:06 EST (#)
Ranking: 2
this is a beast of a story, it just kicks ass, people and their predjudices, ever notice how the people who "think" they are being discriminated against, are actually the ones who are racist? i.e.: things such as: "stupid white people," and other things of that natute. it's rediculous. get off your fucking soap box and just read and rate, don't bring up stupid racist shit just so you can call us whities and crap, stupid racist piggs. and the other shitty part is there is no fucking white race, we are all from other fucking countries so why do you think we are all white? i'm fucking 50% german, some itallian, some irish, some french, i'm not fucking "white," my skin might be, but no one is white. go do something else. and i don't think it's fake, it's too rediculous not to be true. life is more often than not way more fucked up than anything someone can make up and write about.
Anakin,
Submitted by siriuslives at 2004-11-04 22:49:59 EST (#)
Ranking: 1
I know this story is made up but it actually was pretty funny for some of the time
Submitted by Andy K <andykyr.at.lineone.net> at 2004-11-04 10:49:56 EST (#)
Ranking: 2
After reading this I will never eat a red Skittle again through fear of a Shaolin shitkicking!
Submitted by shandythedog (user info) at 2004-11-03 20:51:57 EST (#)
Ranking: 2
anything which actually brings forth laughter out of my gob gets a plus 2.
quite sureal.
however, did it occur to you the asian slut couldn't speak english properly and coudln't understand your requests?
also, of course, they are all mad.
Submitted by Method (user info) at 2004-11-03 17:09:41 EST (#)
Ranking: 2
You silly koreans
Submitted by Grock at 2004-11-03 15:42:20 EST (#)
Ranking: 0
"1337 dude <j571_98.at.yahoo.com>"
you sir, are a fucking moron.
Taste the rainbow bitch!!
Submitted by 1337_dude (user info) at 2004-11-03 14:40:35 EST (#)
Ranking: -2
Whee, now the vote counts, even if just a little!
Submitted by 1337 dude <j571_98.at.yahoo.com> at 2004-11-03 14:29:07 EST (#)
Ranking: -2
And to restate: I am in fact rating the story based on the quality. Take it from the red skittle's view: a pair of guys are screwing with your girl and then you decide to step up. Immediately afterwards, they decide to draw their swords and proclaim their "masculinity." (I didn't know white guys felt masculinity from swords, except for vikings. I thought it was all about 2x4s and fists.) Shitty story; might've been fun if the Red Skittle kicked everyone's ass instead, but then Method wouldn't have written the story. :( I mean, really now. Even from Method's POV: shaking a sword at an asian guy, with a friend no less, isn't really that masculine. Especially for white guys. Maybe if it was a pair of fists, sure. But leave the swords to the asians and middle easterns and stop telling yourself (Method) that you were the winners after some guy with no clue and seeing his friend getting harassed happens to show up and ruin your fun. You're winners all right - congrats.
Submitted by 1337 dude <j571_98.at.yahoo.com> at 2004-11-03 14:22:28 EST (#)
Ranking: -2
10c7c has it right. (I don't like rap, especially asian rap, but I know many of my kinsmen do.)
And as for the Rosa Parks analogy, that wasn't the main point. The point was that the Asian girl probably didn't understand Engrish (hehe, Engrish) too well and the seat might be the only one left open and vacant. Then the red skittle shows up, sees what's happening, and oh no, the red skittle is suddenly the bad guy! Of course I hoped he would've known [insert mystic asian martial art here] but he ran off after two white guys drew their swords and afterwards seemed to be proclaiming their "masculinity." As if white guys even knew how to use swords - HA. The white peasants might have known how to use long pikes during the fun European wars, but they knew damn little about how to use swords.
Submitted by Random Joe at 2004-11-03 05:24:20 EST (#)
Ranking: 0
look out its an enraged gook!
Submitted by 10c7c (user info) at 2004-11-03 05:03:52 EST (#)
Ranking: -2
Submitted by mikeaz (user info) at 2004-11-03 03:24:16 (#)
Ranking: 0
any fucking asian pride responses are gay - he told her to move cause they were eating in a restraunt and wanted to all sit together. this has no relation to the rosa parks story from the 50s and its degrading to her to compare it. it could have been a fucking irish/ french/ mexican skittle no one gives a fuck so shut you trap and rate it based on the story not your equality agenda
eat a dick faggot
fucken white people
Submitted by mikeaz (user info) at 2004-11-03 03:24:16 EST (#)
Ranking: 0
any fucking asian pride responses are gay - he told her to move cause they were eating in a restraunt and wanted to all sit together. this has no relation to the rosa parks story from the 50s and its degrading to her to compare it. it could have been a fucking irish/ french/ mexican skittle no one gives a fuck so shut you trap and rate it based on the story not your equality agenda
Submitted by F U at 2004-11-02 14:17:53 EST (#)
Ranking: 2
My roomate is asian, and he farts in his sleep
Submitted by professorfuckface (user info) at 2004-11-02 05:13:22 EST (#)
Ranking: 2
Submitted by professorfuckface (user info) at 2004-10-19 01:02:47 (#)
Ranking: 0
Blah blah blah azn h8er
---
I think I may have been onto something.
Submitted by Method (user info) at 2004-11-02 05:04:34 EST (#)
Ranking: 0
It seems I have angered the Azn community.
I am hanging up my Karate Kid headband in shame.
Method-san is no more.
Submitted by 10c7c (user info) at 2004-11-02 00:35:23 EST (#)
Ranking: -2
It's the azn nigga fuck the rest
Dallas to New York jigga, we the best
Vietnam to Japan to Mongolia
Philippines to Taiwan to Cambodia
Korea, ah ah, hometown China
who you got, huh?
you got shit nigga, feel the size
it's the A-Z-N better recognize
got rice, bitch? got rice?
got food, got soup, got spice?
got brains like us? got skills like us?
got cars? got clothes? got girls like us?
wassup we the shit and we kill ya'll fools
we got money in the bank from our family jewels
can we help it if we raid and corrupt the schools?
it don't matter fuck the law shit we break the rules
we jack cars, pop games, yo we got the tools
flip it up, break it down then we shoot some pool,
you fuck with me, you fuck with all bitch, don't think it's cool
one on one fuck that it's three on one no duels
got rice bitch? got rice?
anything you can show that is nice?
got cash,got moves, got thoughts like us?
Fuck no, Hell you white you'll never be like us
Take off your shoes when you enter please
or Crawl around on the floor with your fucking knees
don't mind the smell you'll get used to it
moth balls, fried squid, and that buddha shit
what the hell is that you think i don't see
no forks in the house chops sticks only
have a taste don't be scared try the lemon tea
you don't want thats alright try the fuck on me
Got rice bitch, got rice?
Got luck anytime you roll the dice?
your luck is bad unless you run and hide,
coz we're thugs for life baby, Asian Pride...
It's the azn nigga fuck the rest
Dallas to New York jigga, we the best
Vietnam to Japan to Mongolia
Philippines to Taiwan to Cambodia
Korea, ah ah, hometown China
who you got, huh?
you got shit nigga, feel the size
it's the A-Z-N better recognize
got rice, bitch? got rice?
got food, got soup, got spice?
got brains like us? got skills like us?
got cars? got clothes? got girls like us?
wassup we the shit and we kill ya'll fools
we got money in the bank from our family jewels
can we help it if we raid and corrupt the schools?
it don't matter fuck the law shit we break the rules
we jack cars, pop games, yo we got the tools
flip it up, break it down then we shoot some pool,
you fuck with me, you fuck with all bitch, don't think it's cool
one on one fuck that it's three on one no duels
got rice bitch? got rice?
anything you can show that is nice?
got cash,got moves, got thoughts like us?
Fuck no, Hell you white you'll never be like us
Take off your shoes when you enter please
or Crawl around on the floor with your fucking knees
don't mind the smell you'll get used to it
moth balls, fried squid, and that buddha shit
what the hell is that you think i don't see
no forks in the house chops sticks only
have a taste don't be scared try the lemon tea
you don't want thats alright try the fuck on me
Got rice bitch, got rice?
Got luck anytime you roll the dice?
your luck is bad unless you run and hide,
coz we're thugs for life baby, Asian Pride...
It's the azn nigga fuck the rest
Dallas to New York jigga, we the best
Vietnam to Japan to Mongolia
Philippines to Taiwan to Cambodia
Korea, ah ah, hometown China
who you got, huh?
you got shit nigga, feel the size
it's the A-Z-N better recognize
got rice, bitch? got rice?
got food, got soup, got spice?
got brains like us? got skills like us?
got cars? got clothes? got girls like us?
wassup we the shit and we kill ya'll fools
we got money in the bank from our family jewels
can we help it if we raid and corrupt the schools?
it don't matter fuck the law shit we break the rules
we jack cars, pop games, yo we got the tools
flip it up, break it down then we shoot some pool,
you fuck with me, you fuck with all bitch, don't think it's cool
one on one fuck that it's three on one no duels
got rice bitch? got rice?
anything you can show that is nice?
got cash,got moves, got thoughts like us?
Fuck no, Hell you white you'll never be like us
Take off your shoes when you enter please
or Crawl around on the floor with your fucking knees
don't mind the smell you'll get used to it
moth balls, fried squid, and that buddha shit
what the hell is that you think i don't see
no forks in the house chops sticks only
have a taste don't be scared try the lemon tea
you don't want thats alright try the fuck on me
Got rice bitch, got rice?
Got luck anytime you roll the dice?
your luck is bad unless you run and hide,
coz we're thugs for life baby, Asian Pride...
It's the azn nigga fuck the rest
Dallas to New York jigga, we the best
Vietnam to Japan to Mongolia
Philippines to Taiwan to Cambodia
Korea, ah ah, hometown China
who you got, huh?
you got shit nigga, feel the size
it's the A-Z-N better recognize
got rice, bitch? got rice?
got food, got soup, got spice?
got brains like us? got skills like us?
got cars? got clothes? got girls like us?
wassup we the shit and we kill ya'll fools
we got money in the bank from our family jewels
can we help it if we raid and corrupt the schools?
it don't matter fuck the law shit we break the rules
we jack cars, pop games, yo we got the tools
flip it up, break it down then we shoot some pool,
you fuck with me, you fuck with all bitch, don't think it's cool
one on one fuck that it's three on one no duels
got rice bitch? got rice?
anything you can show that is nice?
got cash,got moves, got thoughts like us?
Fuck no, Hell you white you'll never be like us
Take off your shoes when you enter please
or Crawl around on the floor with your fucking knees
don't mind the smell you'll get used to it
moth balls, fried squid, and that buddha shit
what the hell is that you think i don't see
no forks in the house chops sticks only
have a taste don't be scared try the lemon tea
you don't want thats alright try the fuck on me
Got rice bitch, got rice?
Got luck anytime you roll the dice?
your luck is bad unless you run and hide,
coz we're thugs for life baby, Asian Pride...
Submitted by Method (user info) at 2004-11-01 22:55:20 EST (#)
Ranking: -2
YEAH FUCKIN WHITEY JUDO CHOP ON YO ROUND EYE ASS BITCH
Submitted by 1337 dude <j571_98.at.yahoo.com> at 2004-11-01 22:42:32 EST (#)
Ranking: -2
Submitted by mute <mutantpaperboy.at.adelphia.net> at 2004-10-29 02:05:29 (#)
Ranking: 2
way awsome, anyone who gave this a -2 because of something racial is just fucking biggoted
---------------------------------------------------------------------------------
Oh, I'm sorry. I forgot that white people are the masters of this world and we asians should bow down and kiss their asses. I forgot that we are supposed to give up a side seat to let the white man sit in it - sounds familiar, from something in the '50s, right? Oh, right, the white man was there first. From the looks of it, the place could have been filled and the asian girl just wanted a place to sit for a second or two (never did say that the store was empty and had other empty seats; that's selective writing for you) - but nah, that couldn't be it. She wanted to impede on your property and the righteous white man must have his way.
BOW DOWN TO THE WHITE MAN. ALL HAIL THE WHITE MAN. And immediately afterwards you bow, just do a 5-move or more kata and proceed to break their arms, knees, and even a few ribs. Let them try to draw their sword then, bitches.
Submitted by ScoutCJustice (user info) at 2004-11-01 16:00:12 EST (#)
Ranking: 2
I...
can't...
fucking...
breathe
Submitted by jimbo (user info) at 2004-11-01 10:41:22 EST (#)
Ranking: 2
Hilarious.
Submitted by bananagurl (user info) at 2004-11-01 09:20:42 EST (#)
Ranking: 2
Funny Shit!
Submitted by packofqtips (user info) at 2004-11-01 02:07:23 EST (#)
Ranking: 2
i was in salem tonight good times no giant skittles funny thing the first people to take pictures with me were asians oh yea i was in a gorilla suit dancing around the streets
Submitted by hyp0luxa (user info) at 2004-11-01 01:51:01 EST (#)
Ranking: 2
"If it wasn't for the sword, he would have looked like a total fag with his puffy pants."
"I don't know, goddamm Asians are good at karate and math."
"I was fighting with an Asian Skittle."
"Yeah, that's right , Taste the Rainbow, bitch."
this was all i read.
funny shit
Submitted by AsshOly (user info) at 2004-11-01 01:17:23 EST (#)
Ranking: 2
I loved it the first time and, since I dont remember if I commented/am too lazy to see if I commented, I'll give you another +2.
Submitted by DonkeyOnTheEdge (user info) at 2004-11-01 01:05:05 EST (#)
Ranking: 2
Good job on B@W, fucko.
Submitted by espo (user info) at 2004-10-31 22:42:30 EST (#)
Ranking: 2
i am personally disgusted with the fact that this made it on B@W and my Gillette story didn't.
Methinks there be some peener-sucking afoot...
Anyway, Method. Good job, funny story, +2.
Submitted by Gauranga <koldkompress.at.blueyonder.co.uk> at 2004-10-31 19:24:58 EST (#)
Ranking: 0
Not that good. Saving grace: "Taste the rainbow, Bitch."
Submitted by Biph (user info) at 2004-10-31 12:06:55 EST (#)
Ranking: -2
That chick was asian, and couldn't understand you. She wasn't ignoring you. Also, you pulling your sword out and the dude backing off was way too predictable, and quite un-masculine. There were two of you, why couldn't you have fought at least somewhat like men?
Submitted by 10c7c (user info) at 2004-10-31 09:58:27 EST (#)
Ranking: -2
fucken white people
Submitted by spedmonkey (user info) at 2004-10-31 09:33:19 EST (#)
Ranking: 2
Clearly it was Phinch.
Submitted by icon (user info) at 2004-10-30 13:46:56 EDT (#)
Ranking: 1
Amusing, made me chuckle at one point. +1 for effort.
Submitted by guest <guest.at.guest.com> at 2004-10-30 06:06:56 EDT (#)
Ranking: -2
that was a piece of shit! What the fuck are you retards thnking when you say 'good writing' ? That story sucked giant dildos two times over.
Submitted by action_man at 2004-10-30 02:52:40 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
Action
Submitted by diskincluded <diskincluded.at.hotmail.com> at 2004-10-29 18:58:47 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
Hey, some idiot decides they're gonna barge in on you and your friends, then totally ignores you, they deserve all they get. Good on ya mate.
And as for all you people saying that we should respect asians even when they do this sort of thing and/or that this is a racist piece of crap, just remember who started the whole thing: The asian m&m.
Remember kids, you piss off people with swords, you get what you deserve.
Submitted by the_lone_stranger (user info) at 2004-10-29 18:05:42 EDT (#)
Ranking: 0
Funny scene, but ultimately anti-climactic. Solid 0.
Submitted by potatomanjack (user info) at 2004-10-29 15:48:57 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
Excellent and good
Submitted by Yes (user info) at 2004-10-29 15:18:03 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
fuckin' gold.
Submitted by Random Joe at 2004-10-29 10:32:22 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
THIS STORY MADE ME LAFF SO MUCH it was very funny and well structured / written.
Submitted by Goulash (user info) at 2004-10-29 08:56:20 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
i cannot praise this highly enough
Submitted by dave c <tigerfan_17.at.hotmail.com> at 2004-10-29 04:46:33 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
the skittles are evil. don't trust m&m's either. they're all out 2 get us
Submitted by Quasiplasmohedron (user info) at 2004-10-29 03:53:48 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
No Comment
Submitted by mute <mutantpaperboy.at.adelphia.net> at 2004-10-29 02:05:29 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
way awsome, anyone who gave this a -2 because of something racial is just fucking biggoted
Submitted by bdakotac (user info) at 2004-10-28 23:30:00 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
I was going to bypass this post because it was too long. However, as I scrolled down, a few key words and phrases caught my eye, like "gook" and "someone is sitting there."
I decided to read it. It was excellent!
Submitted by Method (user info) at 2004-10-28 23:05:46 EDT (#)
Ranking: -2
YEAH FUCK WHITEY AZN 4 LIEF!!!!!
Submitted by 1337 dude <j571_98.at.yahoo.com> at 2004-10-28 22:53:31 EDT (#)
Ranking: -2
Respect the Asians. Stupid white people. Too bad the Red Skittle didn't kick your asses while you were still drawing your sword - I know I would have.
Submitted by polyamorousaj (user info) at 2004-10-28 20:13:42 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
It's about fucking time, Bart.
Submitted by JonnyX (user info) at 2004-10-28 18:10:54 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
No Comment
Submitted by hidden101 (user info) at 2004-10-28 18:06:42 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
wat r u talkin about i cant undrstand u
Submitted by Naomi at 2004-10-28 18:04:44 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
I'm sorry, but who the fuck dresses up as a skittle or a m&m? how lame
u had a good comeback tho with ur swords and stuff
I would so like 2 see the stupid sweetie costumes
Submitted by mles76 (user info) at 2004-10-28 17:55:05 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
Haha that was great.
Submitted by Jaxal1 <jaxal1.at.yahoo.com> at 2004-10-28 17:48:51 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
Nobody has commented on this yet, so I figured I'd chime in. If he was a skittle and she was an M&M, then they were labeled S&M.
Submitted by Starlet (user info) at 2004-10-28 17:47:46 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
Submitted by Jared_IRL (user info) at 2004-10-19 10:03:33 (#)
Ranking: 2
Submitted by Spuds002 (user info) at 2004-10-19 09:22:41 (#)
Ranking: 2
so you have a puffy legged faggot, and a dude in black, with swords. and a asian in a skittle costume ready to throw down. oh i need a picture of this to surface from a security camara.
----
Fucking awesome.
Submitted by Strut <ssanchez.at.scif.com> at 2004-10-28 17:42:05 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
Hehehe.. math and karate.
Submitted by Method (user info) at 2004-10-28 17:35:07 EDT (#)
Ranking: 0
Holy shit, popped my B@W cherry
Submitted by strider (user info) at 2004-10-28 15:46:34 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
fantastico
Submitted by Gnome (user info) at 2004-10-28 15:25:19 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
heh, it WAS pretty good. who'da thunk?
Submitted by GodLovesALittleLovin (user info) at 2004-10-28 10:15:04 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
Congrats on the B@W.
Submitted by RyuFu (user info) at 2004-10-28 09:10:20 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
Now THAT was fucking hilarious. Yay B@W!
Submitted by kamaji (user info) at 2004-10-28 08:46:09 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
pure genius. in a can.
Submitted by Dead_0hi0_Sky (user info) at 2004-10-25 22:44:00 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
the dragon kick is something to fear, i concur.
Submitted by someone (user info) at 2004-10-25 22:39:27 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
I went to Salem last year and am going again this Sunday. Pretty good times, gotta love getting ridulously drunk and insulting a witch coven on a ceremonial walk. It's even better when they all look at you and mumble random "curses" and "spells" and your direction. People are CRAZA!
Submitted by BridgetJones (user info) at 2004-10-22 05:11:28 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
Hee hee, good work.
Submitted by Random Joe at 2004-10-22 01:47:19 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
Hahahahah brilliant.
I hate the red skittles...
Submitted by AlwaysAnEagle (user info) at 2004-10-22 01:28:48 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
"Well, see this Skittle attacked me, so I drew my sword and defended myself."
My new life's mission is to get myself into a situation in which that sentence is not only usefully, but out and out necessary.
Submitted by PeteyD4 (user info) at 2004-10-21 06:21:30 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
doo dee doo...
Submitted by Soley_Trinity (user info) at 2004-10-21 06:13:29 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
No Comment
Submitted by funk_boy (user info) at 2004-10-21 05:52:47 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
Submitted by titmouse (user info) at 2004-10-21 04:01:37 (#)
Ranking: -2
retaliate again
----------------------------------------------------------------------------------------
You really are a full time gimp arn't ya?
Submitted by titmouse (user info) at 2004-10-21 04:01:37 EDT (#)
Ranking: -2
retaliate again
Submitted by val <i miss george@i suck.com> at 2004-10-20 17:42:36 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
who is this girl you speak of?
call me bitch.
Submitted by someone at 2004-10-20 14:49:55 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
TASTE THE RAINBOW BITCH!!!
sounds like a line from a gay porno.
Submitted by RamJetMax (user info) at 2004-10-20 14:15:20 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
"Taste the Rainbow, bitch"
Awesome.
Submitted by BlinkSparky (user info) at 2004-10-20 05:47:19 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
love your shit mate
Submitted by Method (user info) at 2004-10-20 05:13:37 EDT (#)
Ranking: 0
My name is Laquishia.
20 bucks says the next review is a -2 from titmouse.
Submitted by triple_optics (user info) at 2004-10-20 05:09:28 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
method's name is george?!
i thought it would be leroy or tyron.
or maybe a winston!
Submitted by polyamorousaj (user info) at 2004-10-19 23:50:15 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
B@W.
If not, College Humor.
Seriously, George, you could write for that site.
Submitted by boredgurl210 (user info) at 2004-10-19 21:22:43 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
"Yeah, that's right , Taste the Rainbow, bitch."
Best. Line. Ever.
B@W
Submitted by stevie_says (user info) at 2004-10-19 21:20:26 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
I want pizza now
Submitted by monkey at 2004-10-19 21:20:13 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
Abso-fucking-lutely hilarious.
Submitted by Rainer (user info) at 2004-10-19 21:07:29 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
Marry me.
Submitted by DonkeyOnTheEdge (user info) at 2004-10-19 13:50:29 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
*ahem*
B@W?
Submitted by knucklesnelson (user info) at 2004-10-19 13:44:02 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
ha
Submitted by ToxicNarcotic (user info) at 2004-10-19 13:39:03 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
for life
Submitted by munkeypants (user info) at 2004-10-19 12:54:04 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
"My hand was on my sword hilt the entire weekend."
hmmmm.....
Submitted by Millie_Grace (user info) at 2004-10-19 12:47:16 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
perfect
Submitted by jew baggage <geraldm.at.ucla.edu> at 2004-10-19 12:13:44 EDT (#)
Ranking: -1
as far as made up stories go, this one sucked.
Submitted by tidalfae (user info) at 2004-10-19 11:32:25 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
Hooray for violent skittles.
Submitted by Shlongy (user info) at 2004-10-19 11:31:06 EDT (#)
Ranking: 1
Skittles have always seemed to be the toughest and most menacing of all the candy-related costumes.
Submitted by hyprspacd (user info) at 2004-10-19 11:07:41 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
...Excellent
Submitted by UBERDOOBIE (user info) at 2004-10-19 11:03:18 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
Did u get permission from Skittles to use their trademark?
Submitted by Phallic_Cymbals (user info) at 2004-10-19 10:58:59 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
This was funny up to the bit just after the ending...
Submitted by thaumaturge (user info) at 2004-10-19 10:57:59 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
Watch out for that kung fu grip.
Submitted by DeathJester (user info) at 2004-10-19 10:43:02 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
No Comment
Submitted by Dervel (user info) at 2004-10-19 10:36:06 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
My hand was on my sword hilt the entire weekend.
---
By sword hilt, I assume that you do of course mean penis.
Submitted by xenon (user info) at 2004-10-19 10:31:28 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
golden
Submitted by Vertigo (user info) at 2004-10-19 10:26:08 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
No Comment
Submitted by MyNameIsTim (user info) at 2004-10-19 10:25:12 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
good story. a better ending would have been if one of the m&ms were a peanut, and you made trailmix out of them. oh well...
Submitted by creep_firebombing (user info) at 2004-10-19 10:13:36 (#)
Ranking: 2
I've seen how big you are, motherfucker. If I saw you in a pizzaria with a sword drawn, I'd leave too.
I'm not gonna speculate how it would turn out. I just know that no good could come of the situation.
--------------------------------------------------------------------------------
what bitch, how dare you stereotype him because he's big? pussy.
j/king...linkskanking... http://www.ubersite.com/m/46657
Submitted by creep_firebombing (user info) at 2004-10-19 10:13:36 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
I've seen how big you are, motherfucker. If I saw you in a pizzaria with a sword drawn, I'd leave too.
I'm not gonna speculate how it would turn out. I just know that no good could come of the situation.
Submitted by Jared_IRL (user info) at 2004-10-19 10:03:33 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
Submitted by Spuds002 (user info) at 2004-10-19 09:22:41 (#)
Ranking: 2
so you have a puffy legged faggot, and a dude in black, with swords. and a asian in a skittle costume ready to throw down. oh i need a picture of this to surface from a security camara.
Submitted by NerfHerder (user info) at 2004-10-19 09:56:34 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
Well done, Method.
Submitted by precision (user info) at 2004-10-19 09:45:52 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
we need pictures of this
Submitted by TigerLilly (user info) at 2004-10-19 09:44:44 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
Superb! Asian M&M..sounds like
something sexual.
Submitted by garyhal (user info) at 2004-10-19 09:29:35 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
Blirriant. U have velly velly good wliting skill.
Submitted by Spuds002 (user info) at 2004-10-19 09:22:41 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
so you have a puffy legged faggot, and a dude in black, with swords. and a asian in a skittle costume ready to throw down. oh i need a picture of this to surface from a security camara.
Submitted by triple_optics (user info) at 2004-10-19 08:56:23 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
Submitted by I_Have_a_Kristen_Fetish (user info) at 2004-10-19 06:50:05 (#)
Ranking: 2
God dammit Method! Quit posting good shit. You might make Optics leave.
------------------------------------------------------------------------
Yes i would.
nice to have a bit of consitancy in a post.
good stuff.
Submitted by Spookster (user info) at 2004-10-19 07:20:52 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
Need pictures.....
Must have pictures!!
Submitted by I_Have_a_Kristen_Fetish (user info) at 2004-10-19 06:50:05 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
God dammit Method! Quit posting good shit. You might make Optics leave.
Submitted by funk_boy (user info) at 2004-10-19 06:30:26 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
No Comment
Submitted by zakalwe (user info) at 2004-10-19 05:45:13 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
Great mental image.
Submitted by Valacosa (user info) at 2004-10-19 05:38:39 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
"The plague of verbal locusts that spewed forth from her mouth from time to time was enough to scatter the Four Horsemen of the Apocalypse to the winds."
GOLD
Submitted by Method (user info) at 2004-10-19 05:29:31 EDT (#)
Ranking: -2
She had a - oh, fuck off
Submitted by Kristen (user info) at 2004-10-19 05:26:13 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
YOU NEVER SAID THAT!
NUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUURRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRR
...So how do you know she wasn't a lime Skittle?
Submitted by Method (user info) at 2004-10-19 05:24:57 EDT (#)
Ranking: -2
There was an S on his chest.
NUUUUUUUUUUUURRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRR
Submitted by Kristen (user info) at 2004-10-19 05:22:22 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
How do you know he wasn't a red M&M?
Submitted by Avals (user info) at 2004-10-19 05:16:47 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
+2 for the image of you and your friend brandishing your broadswords (no, not THESE broadswords, goddammit!) at a giant red skittle. Fucking priceless!
Submitted by Sideburns (user info) at 2004-10-19 05:16:43 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
UberMethod: WHATEVER I DONT NEED YOUR SYMPATHY
UberMethod: FUCKER
UberMethod: whatcha up to
Submitted by landyuk (user info) at 2004-10-19 05:01:20 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
Yeah, that's right , Taste the Rainbow, bitch
good yarns you weave!
Submitted by jack11058 (user info) at 2004-10-19 04:27:42 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
Fucking. A.
Submitted by Quartermain (user info) at 2004-10-19 04:06:51 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
No Comment
Submitted by shitfuck (user info) at 2004-10-19 03:40:25 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
Taste the Rainbow...BITCH!!!!
AHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHHAAHAHAHHAAHAHAHHAAHAHAHHAAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHHAAAHAHAHHAAHAHHAA
Submitted by Adam2127 at 2004-10-19 02:14:55 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
I nearly shat myself. Good stuff; finally some 2 material
Submitted by tinactin (user info) at 2004-10-19 02:07:07 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
You're a son of a bitch. I'll tell you why some other time.
Submitted by hidden101 (user info) at 2004-10-19 01:58:25 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
i love it.
Submitted by MouRNIngLoRY (user info) at 2004-10-19 01:45:53 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
"I wasn't planning on actually stabbing anyone, and neither was my friend, but we had big sharp swords, and goddammit, I was going to use it at least once that weekend."
BEAUTIFUL. Fucking beautiful.
Submitted by kai070169 (user info) at 2004-10-19 01:41:21 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
"Yeah, that's right , Taste the Rainbow, bitch."
Submitted by Method (user info) at 2004-10-19 01:32:40 EDT (#)
Ranking: -2
You dare utter that blasphemous word here, filthy mule?
Submitted by QueenAshlee (user info) at 2004-10-19 01:31:28 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
Please say this really happened. Please.
Submitted by DonkeyOnTheEdge (user info) at 2004-10-19 01:31:23 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
Shenanigans.
Submitted by Tigre (user info) at 2004-10-19 01:25:22 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
PHAZ0000R!
Submitted by sparkle_pink (user info) at 2004-10-19 01:08:37 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
"goddamm Asians are good at karate and math"
Hahahaha. And music. Whenever I see I'm competeing against someone Asian, I know I'm going to lose.
Submitted by Lechuga (user info) at 2004-10-19 01:05:55 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
Oh, (V)eTHoD, That was great. Unfortunately, I must linkwhore, because a similar incident happened to me. That was wicked funny though.
http://www.ubersite.com/m/43914
Submitted by GodChicken (user info) at 2004-10-19 01:03:14 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
hahahaa
Taste this!
Submitted by professorfuckface (user info) at 2004-10-19 01:02:47 EDT (#)
Ranking: 0
Blah blah blah azn h8er
Submitted by bob (user info) at 2004-10-19 01:01:50 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
i love skittles.
Submitted by TheMidnight12AM (user info) at 2004-10-19 01:01:29 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
Awesome writing.