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Train Shennanigens (531 hits)

Category: None

Rating: 0 on 4 reviews (Rate this item) (V)
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Submitted by WhoJustShat? (View user info) at 2004-10-23 15:43:46 EDT


If the conductor goes on this site, he'll kill me. Or at least I'll never get any free train rides...

I travel to and from college on a train. It's a hell of a ride, but at least I get an extra 45 minutes of sleep before class starts. I have some observations to share and then two short stories.



1. I absolutely love the sense of revenge I feel toward the mult-million dollar houses along the train route. These people spend about 2 mil for a three story stone mansion and a swimming pool in the shape of kidneys, ovals, or penises (whatever floats their boat). Lucky bastards. I feel jealous until I realize that trains go by every 15 minutes. Loud train whistles, horns, and engines are constant. They wake up every 15 minutes to blaring bells. It makes me giggle knowing I get uninterrupted sleep in my little house.

2. People watching is incredible on trains. The conversations people have on public transportation are hilarious. One man was trying to pick up a woman and she blew him off. I laughed. And he couldn't go anywhere to get away from the embarassment. It brightened my day. And a Mexican immigrant asked me to be his girlfriend. At least I think that's what he asked, but it's hard to understand him. I think he said his name was Ernie, and he told me that after he asked me to be his girlfriend. He didn't ask my name at all. So I called my boyfriend, Tim, and said that if a Mexican named Ernie asked, Tim and I are engaged.

3. The more important it is for you to catch a train in time, the less of a chance you'll make it before the train leaves. 'Nuff said.

Now for the stories. This first one was told to me by a veteran train rider who has taken the train for 4 years to school. One wintery day, she was riding along with all of the commuters toward their daily activities. Nothing is out of the ordinary. All of a sudden, the train stops at an isolated forest area and everyone is ordered out into the snow and wind. Fifteen minutes goes by. A half hour. An ambulance finds its way to the service road along the tracks. Everyone begins wondering what happened. Did someone have a heart attack? Did the train hit someone? Panic sets in. I bet you're wondering what happened. Apparently, a man had taken the 6:30 am train into the city. During the ride, he went into the dirty train bathroom cubicle. Four hours later, someone found him dead of a heart attack on the toilet. That's a happy commute, huh?

My final story actually has nothing to do with the train ride, but it's a dream that one of the conductors had about my fellow train rider, we'll call her Jane. For some reason, the conductor felt compelled to tell Jane this.
He meets Jane on the train and she asks if he wants to see her tattoo. She shows him and ends up stripping down naked. He gets naked too. As dreams do, everything shifted around. Next thing he knows, they're still naked, but he's sitting in a high chair, wearing a bib. Jane is feeding him apple sauce and wiping his chin with a silk hankerchief.

Anyone do dream analysis? And is this sexual harassment?

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User Reviews


Submitted by purringbubbles (user info) at 2004-10-23 22:01:53 EDT (#)
Ranking: 0

i was amused and i wrote down my thoughts.

Submitted by TheMidnight12AM (user info) at 2004-10-23 19:50:44 EDT (#)
Ranking: -2

What?

Submitted by boredgurl210 (user info) at 2004-10-23 17:18:42 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2

I, too, ride trains sometimes to get to school. People watching is interesting then.

Submitted by kai070169 (user info) at 2004-10-23 16:31:23 EDT (#)
Ranking: 0

I felt harassed.


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