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Saturday Night Live! (2084 hits)

Category: None

Rating: 1.69 on 51 reviews (Rate this item) (V)
Labels:

Submitted by Lyric (View user info) at 2004-10-24 04:49:56 EDT


You know, Saturday Night Live used to be a really funny show. I remember way back when only the *good* people were on and every skit was awesome, and it was a guaranteed good time if you decided to watch it.

Lately, it's been going to shit. It's all the NEW people's fault. They just come in and ruin it for everyone else!

Whoa, am I talking about Saturday Night Live or Ubersite? HA. Alright, I'm just kidding.

Anyways, my entire point of this admittedly short post is, tonight's episode of Saturday Night Live was, bar none, the fucking funniest SNL I have ever seen in my life. Any other time I watch this show will NEVER match up to the gloriousness that was tonight.

Why?



Well, tonight, they had Ashlee Simpson as a muscial guest. You know that annoying wannabe "pop punk" singer who only got a record deal because her sister thinks buffalo have wings? The one that can't carry a tune to save her life? Yeah, her. So I'm sitting there, watching the rather tasty-looking Jude Law introduce her for a second song. She comes on, starts dancing around like she's Queen HotShit, and I notice there's something wrong with the music. It's all tinny and weird. Suddenly, her voice booms out the first couple vocals of that song of hers, "Pieces of Me". Now here's where it gets gold... she had her hands by her sides. HA!

She jumps around in shock, stares up at the drummer, and some techie quickly turns down the music. There's nothing for a few seconds, she's just standing there. The band quickly starts playing the song, and she turns around and walks off stage. Cut to commercial.

When the show ends, she's onstage and she quickly yells out that her band started playing the wrong song and she's SO SORRY!


Yes.


Yes.



YES.


I haven't laughed that much in a long, long time. I mean, yeah, of course all those fucking pop tarts lip synch, after all, that's unfortunately what passes as talent these days. But to be caught so blatantly red-handed...

Silly Ashlee, tricks are for kids.




Thank you, Saturday Night Live. Thank you.

ashleesimpson.jpg (94 kB)

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User Reviews


Submitted by TragicKingdom (user info) at 2004-12-31 16:34:14 EST (#)
Ranking: 2

I wish I'd seen that one...

Submitted by Schwarzes_Glas (user info) at 2004-12-31 16:22:21 EST (#)
Ranking: 2

Two words:

(Fucking)Horacio Sans

Submitted by munkeypants (user info) at 2004-12-20 19:36:12 EST (#)
Ranking: 2

I feel kinda bad for her.

Submitted by Istaros (user info) at 2004-11-12 17:11:12 EST (#)
Ranking: 1

"The one that can't carry a tune to save her life?"

what do you mean, "THE ONE"?? THERE'S HUNDREDS OF THEM



as for SNL: fucking aye. Cheri Oteri is nutty enough to make me laugh once a month or so, however.

Submitted by Lechuga (user info) at 2004-11-12 07:15:21 EST (#)
Ranking: 2

Well, this just ruled all over the place.

If you had a good time when you go and see Ashlee Simpson, and tell your friends that "She's an amazing vocal talent," Kill yourself.

Submitted by Ingsoc (user info) at 2004-10-27 19:45:03 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2

I told you homeboy!

http://www.ubersite.com/m/40372

Sound the bell, school's in sucker!

Submitted by Sideburns (user info) at 2004-10-27 06:54:33 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2

Submitted by Lyric (user info) at 2004-09-25 05:47:20 (#)
Ranking: 2

Girls are fucking sluts. Stay away from them, they're nothing but trouble. Seriously.

Although...

My offer of marriage still stands. ;)
-------------

I never answered that, did I?

I accept.

Submitted by DJMattB241 (user info) at 2004-10-26 18:08:50 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2

owned?





owned!

Submitted by Thankful_Slapshot99 <Kidding_Right@napolean_complex> at 2004-10-26 14:20:14 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2

Ashley needs......More Cowbell...

Submitted by Adamdidit2u (user info) at 2004-10-26 14:07:51 EDT (#)
Ranking: 0

-2 for still watching SNL
+2 for hating Ashlee Simpson

Submitted by RamJetMax (user info) at 2004-10-25 11:20:37 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2

Saturday Night Not So Live

Submitted by Brianthetruthspeaker (user info) at 2004-10-24 21:42:12 EDT (#)
Ranking: 1

What is sad is that these performance artists are everywhere
Millie Vanillie was run out of Music for lip-syncing
Now its common practice, we all could name about a dozen of them that if they had to sing. Wouldn't make the first cut on "Star search"
This is coming for a No talent non-singing person. Myself.
However, with my friends' audio washer and some dubbing, I sounded like I could win an AMA award.
It is what it is.
it is sad. Nevertheless, she is nice eye candy.


Submitted by sublime (user info) at 2004-10-24 18:26:15 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2

Submitted by polyamorousaj (user info) at 2004-10-24 17:55:19 (#)
Ranking: 2

AHAHAHA

One of the many reasons I stopped watching SNL years ago.

The only ones worth a damn on it now are Tina Fey and Tracy Morgan.
-------------------------------------------------------------------

Weren't you only allowed to stay up past 12 last year?

Submitted by Karl Rove at 2004-10-24 18:08:25 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2

No thanks required.

Submitted by polyamorousaj (user info) at 2004-10-24 17:55:19 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2

AHAHAHA

One of the many reasons I stopped watching SNL years ago.

The only ones worth a damn on it now are Tina Fey and Tracy Morgan.

Submitted by DonkeyOnTheEdge (user info) at 2004-10-24 17:50:15 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2

No talent pseudo pop bitches who get owned on live TV always get a +2.

Submitted by Blitzen (user info) at 2004-10-24 16:17:55 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2

i wholeheartedly agree

she is a dirty, dirty tramp and this made me all warm inside

Submitted by BoogieFevuh (user info) at 2004-10-24 16:09:23 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2

Awesome!

Submitted by hidden101 (user info) at 2004-10-24 15:01:55 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2

i hope she dies.

Submitted by GhostWriter (user info) at 2004-10-24 14:42:05 EDT (#)
Ranking: 0

yea, i loved how she said it was her bands fault...conceited

Submitted by professorfuckface (user info) at 2004-10-24 14:21:55 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2

That has got to be a fucking joke. Even I could lipsynche and air guitar it without practising.

Submitted by HatMan (user info) at 2004-10-24 14:11:23 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2

I knew there was a reason I watched SNL last night. I laughed my ass off at what happened. Oh, and the CH link is kinda swamped right now, here's another link: http://x.dirtytrain.com/rico/ashlee.simpsons.big.snl.fuck.up.mpg

Submitted by Lyric (user info) at 2004-10-24 14:05:52 EDT (#)
Ranking: 0

WillZone, thanks for the link!

Submitted by landyuk at 2004-10-24 14:05:14 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2

I fucking despise her!

Submitted by I_Have_a_Kristen_Fetish (user info) at 2004-10-24 13:55:40 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2

Auto Lyric +2

Submitted by WillZone (user info) at 2004-10-24 12:38:49 EDT (#)
Ranking: 0

find it here:

http://www.collegehumor.com/news/ashlee_snl.wmv

Submitted by GodLovesALittleLovin (user info) at 2004-10-24 12:10:18 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2

I thought the whole point behind SNL was that all music and entertainment was live and on the spot? Boo to SNL for even letting her try to get away with it in the first place.

Submitted by Rainer (user info) at 2004-10-24 12:08:01 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2

I actually like the new SNL. There hasn't really been a season of SNL that I didn't like.

Ashlee Simpson, however, sucks donkey balls. +2, sir.

Submitted by StonedSilly (user info) at 2004-10-24 11:53:20 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2

Lyric...

Do you have AIM?
If so, hit me up on 'harmlessness,' please.

Or, e-mail me.
harmlessness.at.gmail.com

Thanks.


Submitted by kai070169 (user info) at 2004-10-24 11:30:10 EDT (#)
Ranking: 0

MAD TV is better, American pop stars bore me.

Submitted by Bigmike (user info) at 2004-10-24 10:26:17 EDT (#)
Ranking: 1

"when SNL had its good cast (Farley, Spade, Carvey, etc.) it had good musical guests."

No.

No.

No.

When SNL had it's GOOD cast, the not ready for prime time players featuring John Belushi, Dan Aykroyd, Gilda Radner, Chevy Chase, Jane Curtain, Larraine Newman, Garrett Morris, and later Bill Murray were the best. Most of you guys don't remember seeing these players live like I did. 1975-1979 were the best years SNL ever had. Much better than any cast since. The musical guests were great as well. SNL was an experience then. Now it just kinda sucks.

Submitted by TigerLilly (user info) at 2004-10-24 09:57:33 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2

I saw! It was sooo funny. She sucks.

Submitted by Kristen (user info) at 2004-10-24 09:02:58 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2

Haha

Submitted by Caulaincourt (user info) at 2004-10-24 08:52:39 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2

Can I be your male groupie?

Submitted by Random Joe at 2004-10-24 08:52:02 EDT (#)
Ranking: 0

lorne michaels sucks. he has destroyed the show. He doesn't know what is funny anymore!

Submitted by Sideburns (user info) at 2004-10-24 07:33:56 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2

And I missed it. Damnit.

And all you betta recognize this--


SIDEBURNS IS A PLAYBOY

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Submitted by heyzues (user info) at 2004-10-24 07:19:19 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2

WOOOOOOHOOOOOO

Submitted by corn_nugget (user info) at 2004-10-24 06:04:31 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2

No Comment

Submitted by PWNstar (user info) at 2004-10-24 06:04:17 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2

when SNL had its good cast (Farley, Spade, Carvey, etc.) it had good musical guests. Paul Simon (friend of Lorne) was on the more than any other musical guest. when was the last time he was on? exactly. bad cast, bad guests.

Submitted by BlinkSparky (user info) at 2004-10-24 05:55:26 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2

lyric u make me laugh
but i'd do her





































in the pooper

Submitted by Poster_Boy_KoolMang (user info) at 2004-10-24 05:16:30 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2

She would be attractive if it weren't for that fucking witch nose. I saw her on some MTV awards thingy a couple of days ago (rerun), and she was doing her "Pieces of me" song. How is her music original? Then she does that "Shadow" single, and it's so fucking gay, and she acts like a retard in the video. Then at the end, she does this gibberish, and after saying it, she says "Shadow."

WOW. DEEP. MAKE A SONG ABOUT FUCKING MILKY FRUIT LOOPS, AND SAY SHADOW AT THE END, AND YOU AUTOMATICALLY HAVE A SOUL!

I hate her a lot. I honestly wonder what her sister thinks about her. I think this is Avril Lavigne's fault. She's like "I can dress punk and sing shit music if I want to!", so Ashlee decided she'll only sing country music, and dress like...whatever.

+2 for hating Ashlee Simpson.

Wanna know another thing that's gay? In the U.S, the drinking age is 21. I know that even 14 year olds in the U.S drink heavily, but I mean the freedom of going to the beer store and getting a case of Guinness when you're of legal age is the best part of going to college. I mean, isn't it a bit fucking stupid that you're old enough to live on your own, buy cigarettes, get married and have kids, make your own decisions, your parents FORCE you to pay for tuition on your own...

...and the fact that most colleges/universities have a bar you can just stroll into, no bouncers, no tape to cross, just go to bar and order.

My question is: isn't it gay that you go into college, yet you can't buy your own booze? Again, I know about the fake ID thing, I'm just saying, if you're a college student, you should automatically have the RIGHT to drink alcohol.

Submitted by Lyric (user info) at 2004-10-24 05:01:49 EDT (#)
Ranking: 0

Even better. This was on her website.


From Lucky Magazine interview:

LM: What are your takes on lip-synching?

AS: I'm totally against it and offended by it. I'm going out to let my real talent show, not to just stand there and dance around. Personally, I'd never lip-synch. It's just not me.












YES.

Submitted by Method (user info) at 2004-10-24 05:01:24 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2

No Comment

Submitted by sparkle_pink (user info) at 2004-10-24 05:01:11 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2

OH! Perhaps people smarter than me will understand right away. Plus it's pretty late. I get exponentionally dumber as the day goes on.

Sorry I'm a retard.

Submitted by stevie_says (user info) at 2004-10-24 04:59:58 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2

That was the funniest thing I've seen in a while. I laughed until my sides hurt.

Submitted by professorfuckface (user info) at 2004-10-24 04:59:31 EDT (#)
Ranking: 0

Ha. If people were watching her for her music then it might make a difference.

Submitted by Lyric (user info) at 2004-10-24 04:59:08 EDT (#)
Ranking: 0

:( Don't tell me I didn't make it clear enough.

In her hand, was her microphone.

The music, and more explicitly, the vocals, came on as her hands... were at her sides.


Lip synching is bad, especially when you run offstage when you're caught.

Hey, I tried. I wrote this fast. I'm so sorry, it was my band's fault!!!!

Bahahaha, just kidding ;)

-2 DIE Ashlee Simpson!

Submitted by Pringles4eva (user info) at 2004-10-24 04:58:48 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2

it IS a comedy show, after all...

Submitted by sparkle_pink (user info) at 2004-10-24 04:57:11 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2

So you can't lip-sync with your hands at your sides? Why?

Submitted by Lyric (user info) at 2004-10-24 04:54:58 EDT (#)
Ranking: 0

Because she was lip-synching!


I wish I had talent like that.


Unfortunately, my only talent is in my pants.

Submitted by sparkle_pink (user info) at 2004-10-24 04:53:14 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2

I don't understand what happened. What does it matter that her hands were at her sides?

Either way, +2 because I hate Ashlee Simpson.


Homer: I keep hearing this horrible irregular thumping noise.

Pump Jockey:
It's your heart. And I think it's on its last thump.

Homer: Whew, I was afraid it was my transmission.

Homer's Triple Bypass