Gotta get this off my chest... (986 hits)
Category: NoneRating: 1.42 on 42 reviews (Rate this item) (V)
Submitted by Nomad <Drainoe.at.hotmail.com> (View user info) at 2004-10-25 00:03:44 EDT
Sex and dating.
I remember in High School, the football players got all the girls.
Now, I've been out of touch with the whole dating scene. I'm not good at approaching women, I don't really know how to flirt and I don't have the confidence to back any of that up.
It hurts. It hurts really bad.
I got a call from this girl I've been seeing. She asked me if I wanted to get a cup of coffee. I said sure.
She picked me up and we chatted over coffee. As we are sitting there this guy comes in. Athletic hot type of guy. As we get up to leave, she gives him the eyes.
You know, the "come fuck me" eyes.
I can't remember ever getting those eyes. What can I say about that?
Well, I've always been overweight. Sometimes very overweight, sometimes slightly overweight. So I've never been hot. I'm cute, I've heard that enough to believe it. But sexy? No, never that.
I am jealous. I don't have the social experience at 21 that your average 17 year old has. I'm not good at turning women on. I'm not confident enough to withstand rejection in a normal manner. And having a girl that I've "been seeing" giving another guy the come fuck me eyes right infront of me has been happening to me for a long time.
I never really got the girl.
Now, I'm getting older. I've lost alot of weight recently. I'm hitting the gym really damn hard to get myself in shape.
But I'm tired of this. This girl is great, everything about her. Except for the fact that she will sleep with other guys. Hot guys.
And not with me. I've received no signals as to that sort of thing. But SHE keeps calling ME and asking ME out to do stuff. I don't buy her stuff, so that's not it.
She wont look me in the eyes. Like she's afraid that I will see something. We've talked about sex and she has openly admitted to having casual sex a few times before. But I get the funny feeling that she's been fucking around while calling ME up and inviting ME places. And seeming to be interested, yet not.
I'm at a loss. I don't understand my position in this game. Does anyone know guys like me? Why don't I ever get attention? Or even respect? She openly flirted with that guy right infront of me! And he openly flirted with her, right infront of me!
I honestly think that there is a good chance she's fucking that guy as I type this. I would not be surprised if she dropped me off and went right on back to dunkins. 7 minute round trip.
Can you imagine how that makes someone like me feel?
Look, like I said, I understand that I'm not a hot guy. But damnit, I'm not THAT BAD.
What am I doing wrong?
User Reviews
Submitted by MickGinny (user info) at 2004-10-26 08:20:50 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
You obviously have something about you that is appealing to this girl, it is the same thing that has appealed to me; your honesty.
The thing you lack is self confidence. Not looks. No one can teach you how to attain confidence. Going to the gym helps, but again, how attractive someone is does not automatically mean they are confident or happy.
Example:
Woody Allen- confident mofo, self-made successful man, tagged more tail than a nymphomaniac rabbit, ugly as sin.
Submitted by RandomJose (user info) at 2004-10-25 15:22:42 EDT (#)
Ranking: 0
It may already be too late, but give my advice a shot anyways.
http://www.ubersite.com/m/42056
Submitted by big_wigger (user info) at 2004-10-25 11:50:41 EDT (#)
Ranking: 1
get a hooker
Submitted by RamJetMax (user info) at 2004-10-25 11:26:04 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
Dumb the bitch, she just likes having you around because are comfortable and are easy to talk to. You give her self confidence and positive self esteem. She is using you.
Submitted by Phallic_Cymbals (user info) at 2004-10-25 11:20:12 EDT (#)
Ranking: 1
This woulda been better if it was a photoshop of a chick with cum all over her tits sayin' "I gotta get this off my chest"...
But still, it was pretty solid
Submitted by Kaelic (user info) at 2004-10-25 11:18:36 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
I wish you could roll out with me, dude. I understand the way this shit works pretty well. Inner strength is more important than outer strength ... take it from someone who benches 315.
Submitted by Soley_Trinity (user info) at 2004-10-25 11:12:25 EDT (#)
Ranking: 1
You say that you're seeing her...have you kissed, exchanged sweet nothings, anything of the sort?
Is it possible that she looks on your relationship as totally platonic?
Submitted by drfeggphd (user info) at 2004-10-25 10:59:01 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
What everyone said.
And if all else fails, pretend you don't want her.
Submitted by Thereisnogod (user info) at 2004-10-25 10:52:54 EDT (#)
Ranking: 1
I hate to tell you this but she's using you for her self esteem. Seriously, if she can keep you coming back as often as you do, that makes her feel "sexy" or "wanted" or whatever. She has no personal interest in you, just that she can keep you coming back. If she can keep you on your toes like that, imagine what she does to other men. Dude, she's a ho. A HO. Tell hare to fuck off unless she's interested 'cause I know you wanna fuck her. But, don't let a slut walk on you to better herself.
Submitted by GodLovesALittleLovin (user info) at 2004-10-25 10:37:05 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
We all need to vent sometimes.
Submitted by Circe (user info) at 2004-10-25 10:32:10 EDT (#)
Ranking: 1
Submitted by DanielH (user info) at 2004-10-25 01:11:50 (#)
Ranking: 1
Even when casually talking to a girl, not only caress her hair but gently pull it (from behind, and never pull up) as you look her dead in the eye. Words don't matter at this point. Don't blink as you tell her you'd love to see her again, just not tonight, even if she says she's not doing anything tonight. You are. You've got plans.
___________
Yep. I wish that didn't work, but it does.
Another thing: self confidence. If you don't have it, get it, and if you can't get it, fake it.
Submitted by mrwolf (user info) at 2004-10-25 08:56:18 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
Actually my advice is do what I did (I was short not fat) wonder why girls won't go near you, turn 21, find girls won't leave you alone, never know why and be glad you didn't sleep with any of the slags at school anyway.
Submitted by mrwolf (user info) at 2004-10-25 08:48:13 EDT (#)
Ranking: 1
This is the perfect advice for you...
http://www.ubersite.com/m/46718 making out102/how not to get pussy whipped
Submitted by MyNameIsTim (user info) at 2004-10-25 08:38:13 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
Submitted by Nomad (user info) at 2004-10-25 00:56:55 (#)
Ranking: 0
You know, something occurs to me here:
You guys that do well, or even do okay with the ladies are basically giving me the same advice.
"Man the fuck up pussy boy."
I mentioned football players. Now, I'm starting to think about why they got all the girls.
They had 4 things:
Strength: They were athletic. Strong. You kind of need that to be an effective football player.
Status: Football players are popular. It's just the way it is. With that much exposure, that much female attention, it's just a given.
Power: In high school, popularity is power. You can influence masses.
Personality: Football players (aside from the dumbass ones) were socially adept.
Just a thought.
--------------------------------------------------------------------------------
true story. exactly right. as a football player in HS, you had it all. it was awesome. but when you graduate high school, you're left with a shadow of the body you once had, and your status and popularity are all but gone. all that can carry you on in college is the personality.
As an ex-football player with a 'quiet confidence leader' personality, i'm in your shoes now. it sucks. i used to get all kinds of high school cheerleader pussy when i was in high school. now, that's illegal, and i'm stuck going to bars like everyone else.
bottom line - tell your friend you love her. why not? don't want to lose your friendship? if its really that good, you won't.
i've been there...minus the best friend fucking other 'hot' guys part
Submitted by munkeypants (user info) at 2004-10-25 08:19:49 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
"But I'm tired of this. This girl is great, everything about her. Except for the fact that she will sleep with other guys. Hot guys. "
wait wait wait... hold up. How do you know this? Or are you jumping to comclusions?
You are way too hard on yourself. You are expecting to lose even before you
start the race. You'll never win anything that way.
Submitted by Kent_Weirdo (user info) at 2004-10-25 05:49:37 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
No Comment
Submitted by DanielH (user info) at 2004-10-25 05:46:42 EDT (#)
Ranking: 1
re-read my review below, and get Tori Amos, Mazzy Star, Anne Lenox cds, along with some Snake River Conspiracy, and a little Wu-Tang, and let her "find" these cds, as if you're a little embarrassed she "discoved" them.
Submitted by heyzues (user info) at 2004-10-25 05:15:46 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
I am you. but replace fat with short, and that's me. I know exactly how you feel, more so than I'd like to admit. That shit hurts real bad, to see this girl who says you're so NICE, and so DIFFERENT from all the other guys, and then she'll go out and fuck every body but you.
Yea, it hurts.
Submitted by Istaros (user info) at 2004-10-25 02:34:31 EDT (#)
Ranking: 0
ignore the ladder theory. it's basis is sound, and its great for getting into a mutual bitchfest with the guys, but it makes several critical flaws.
"I mentioned football players. Now, I'm starting to think about why they got all the girls.
They had 4 things:
Strength: They were athletic. Strong. You kind of need that to be an effective football player.
Status: Football players are popular. It's just the way it is. With that much exposure, that much female attention, it's just a given.
Power: In high school, popularity is power. You can influence masses.
Personality: Football players (aside from the dumbass ones) were socially adept."
let's see... wrong, wrong, wrong, and wrong. they like guys like that for two very simple reasons: 1) they don't hide their sexuality, 2) they are unreliable. think about this for a second. you have a girl friend. for the sake of argument, we will accept the theory that you are not initially attracted to her(i know that this is quite impossible in reality, but this is in theory). she is always there for you. talks about anything. listens. doesn't let you down, ever. puts your own needs before hers. does anything she can to make you happy or to bring you pleasure -picks you up from work, watches a movie with you that she doesn't really like, anything. you know that you will never have to worry about offending her or driving her away no matter what. basically, you ARE more important than she is.
when you do all this to her, its even worse than if she were doing it to you. basically, you become a no-risk, no-excitement, no-value, bastion of stability and an emotional repository. in so many words, a cuddle bitch. now tell me, why would she want to fuck that? why would she want to be thought of as fucking that? there's no attraction because there is no RISK OF LOSS. you can't value something if it is guaranteed, can you? as for sexualty, stop worrying about offending her. offend her if that's what it takes to show that you have a dick, and that pussy is always hungry for some dick.
you want help? we all need it from time to time. those of us who don't usually need it, can still improve ourselves; we can always get better. in that vein, go to fastseduction.com, it has everything you need to know. stop worrying about your appearance and focus on your personality.
Submitted by sparkle_pink (user info) at 2004-10-25 01:23:55 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
My advice is that females are stupid.
It's true.
Submitted by DanielH (user info) at 2004-10-25 01:11:50 EDT (#)
Ranking: 1
Getting poon 101.
Watch the movie "Magnolia" every night, on dvd, so you can replay the important parts, for a week. Forget weight or working out. Get a tattoo if anything.
Even when casually talking to a girl, not only caress her hair but gently pull it (from behind, and never pull up) as you look her dead in the eye. Words don't matter at this point. Don't blink as you tell her you'd love to see her again, just not tonight, even if she says she's not doing anything tonight. You are. You've got plans.
Then set a date, before you go out, watch J. Depp in "Don Juan Demarco" several times. During the date, tell her how awesome she looks but also find a reason to tell her she why she needs a spanking; and when you get home, after you're all comfy, pull her over your lap, by her hair (gently, the first time) and deliver said spanking. (1st date, you may leave the panties on, second date, if you haven't already scored, yank then down, with authority.)
Once she has a rosy hot ass, she will curl up next to you, if she doesn't, pull her up to you. Eye contact. Tell her how hot she looks, and how hot she makes you feel. Kiss her then, the juices will be flowing. If you can't take it from here, there's no hope.
Submitted by professorfuckface (user info) at 2004-10-25 01:03:03 EDT (#)
Ranking: 0
Don't be hung up on your looks. Ron Jeremy is one ugly motherfucker, but look at all of the action that he sees.
---
Ron Jeremy has the biggest dick of the entire white race. It isn't the personality that drags those whores in, its the tape sales a 13 incher brings.
Submitted by Freight_Train (user info) at 2004-10-25 01:00:41 EDT (#)
Ranking: -2
stop crying and join the army
oh and SHUT THE FUCK UP
Submitted by Nomad (user info) at 2004-10-25 00:56:55 EDT (#)
Ranking: 0
You know, something occurs to me here:
You guys that do well, or even do okay with the ladies are basically giving me the same advice.
"Man the fuck up pussy boy."
I mentioned football players. Now, I'm starting to think about why they got all the girls.
They had 4 things:
Strength: They were athletic. Strong. You kind of need that to be an effective football player.
Status: Football players are popular. It's just the way it is. With that much exposure, that much female attention, it's just a given.
Power: In high school, popularity is power. You can influence masses.
Personality: Football players (aside from the dumbass ones) were socially adept.
Just a thought.
Submitted by seanfogy (user info) at 2004-10-25 00:56:09 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
Submitted by celine (user info) at 2004-10-25 00:21:58 (#)
Ranking: 1
one big, long, word: http://www.intellectualwhores.com/masterladder.html
read it. it'll help explain blitzkrieg bob's answer. then join the forums.
holeeeee shit that site is awesome. that guy has it broken down to a science. it is bookmarked and will never be deleted so long as i shall live
Submitted by Tigre (user info) at 2004-10-25 00:45:36 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
OOOOOHH!! MAN YOU GOT ADVICE FROM SIDEBURNS!!
SHIIIIIIIIIT!!!
Submitted by seanfogy (user info) at 2004-10-25 00:42:57 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
You've got it all wrong. How ironic that I would be giving out dating advice, but I have been in your situation before and have reigned supreme master of aforementioned vagina.
You like the girl, obviously and she knows it. That's your first mistake. You come off as a reasonably nice guy, and she sounds like a cunt. She's using you for comfort and compliments. What you have to do here is:
Just say no.
Next time she calls you, decline, UNLESS (repeat: UNLESS) she calls to tell you she's on her way over to your house for a round of "snake in the grass". If she calls to ask you out for coffee, shoe shopping, or something equally useless, tell her you're doing laundry, dishes, or something that would make her feel unimportant. Fuck, tell her that youre jacking off watching squirrels fight over nuts in your front yard, whatever. Just so long as she feels not needed.
It will only be a matter of days until she gets the hint and will either:
a) try to win your attention back with the warm, wet hole that we all have come to know and love -OR-
b) just stop calling all together, but doesn't really matter because if this happens you weren't going to give her rugburns anyway, no matter what you tried.
In either case, this is guarenteed to get her to stop playing you like a fucking fiddle. In all honesty, you'd be a lot better off without her fucking with your head in the first place.
Submitted by Zoidberg (user info) at 2004-10-25 00:42:35 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
I advise you to stop playing Dungeons and Dragons
Submitted by Adam2127 at 2004-10-25 00:39:27 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
I know what you are going through, I'm going through a similar situation also. One second I'm on her bed flirting and hanging out and the next she's asking me to give her a ride to her boyfriend's apartment, who is a drunken ass who ignores her and treats her like shit
Submitted by Random Joe at 2004-10-25 00:29:13 EDT (#)
Ranking: 0
Maybe she just considers you as a friend?
Submitted by Nomad (user info) at 2004-10-25 00:29:10 EDT (#)
Ranking: 0
Some really good shit here.
Thanks guys.
Submitted by celine (user info) at 2004-10-25 00:22:58 EDT (#)
Ranking: 0
i meant duke.
Submitted by celine (user info) at 2004-10-25 00:21:58 EDT (#)
Ranking: 1
one big, long, word: http://www.intellectualwhores.com/masterladder.html
read it. it'll help explain blitzkrieg bob's answer. then join the forums.
Submitted by JinkyWilliams (user info) at 2004-10-25 00:19:34 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
Firstly, sit down and define the relationship with her. If you care about it, it will help. Setting boundaries can't help but shed light on the subject.
Secondly, you'll not ever be satisfied in a relationship with someone else until you are first satisfied with yourself.
Stay orange.
--JW
Submitted by maiorano84 (user info) at 2004-10-25 00:17:41 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
Tigre - Good advice.
Submitted by Sideburns (user info) at 2004-10-25 00:15:32 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
Sideburns' pimp advice:
Sometimes, you just have to regulate. Just look her gently in the eyes the next time you're alone, put your hand softly on her cheek, and say:
"Listen, bitch-- I haven't been getting any nookie and you've been fucking every guy that walks past you and his father. I think it's time you start using those lips for something besides talking to me. Now come to my house, get in my bed, and open your legs. I'll do the rest."
Submitted by BLITZKREIG_BOB (user info) at 2004-10-25 00:14:45 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
Firstly, you're in the 'friend zone'. Once you enter the 'friend zone', your chances of doing the horizontal hokey-pokey are flushed down the shitter. The only way to get out of the friend zone is to start being a prick. I dunno if that's your style or not, but some chicks like slight abuse in small amounts. Ignore her for a few days...let her chase after you.
Don't be hung up on your looks. Ron Jeremy is one ugly motherfucker, but look at all of the action that he sees.
Do something badass. Next time some dude starts eye-fucking your woman, give him a little bit of a hassle over it. Chances are he'll back down and then you'll feel better. It'll give you that Johnny Wayne swagger.
Submitted by Duke_Diggler (user info) at 2004-10-25 00:13:30 EDT (#)
Ranking: 1
good story and good points. first of all, i was fat my whole life until junior year in high school. then i ran a lot and lifted weights and lost it all and am now in better than average shape. It can be done, it just takes a little initial effort and some perseverence. second of all, I doubt she is fucking that exact guy , that is just your paranoia setting in, but she very well might be stringing you along and doing other guys. girls are selfish and evil. you should bring up the subject of what she thinks of you , as far as the relationship between you. you deserve a straightforward answer so that at this point you can either become happier, or straight up cut your losses.
Submitted by YELLOW-MAN (user info) at 2004-10-25 00:12:33 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
http://www.ubersite.com/m/49584
Submitted by Tigre (user info) at 2004-10-25 00:11:01 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
You're trying too damn hard bro. Be strong, act tougher. Mentally, women do not find weak men attractive. Hell, get in a fight with some guy over somthing stupid. Win. Do somthing to prove your masculinity. You could even try flirting with another girl. that sends signals that her place with you is being disrupted, and she'll try to recement that; possibly by flirting with you:or more.
Maybe bust out a couple psycology books. I admit I'm not the most gorgeous guy. I get a natural workout from my job, and I've got big muscles. But muscles aren't the only thing; It's your mind man. Have a setforth attitude. Kick some ass, don't give such a hard shit all the time.
+2 for your confidence. I'm sure It'll be huge.
Submitted by bob (user info) at 2004-10-25 00:07:08 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
good shit.
i had the same weight problems and have the same issues so my advice is not to be trusted.
however, i say that you openly ask her about it, see what she says, then keep an open eye if she says no.
Submitted by professorfuckface (user info) at 2004-10-25 00:06:33 EDT (#)
Ranking: 0
You are just the fat fuck. You know how some people like to keep a fat fuck handy at all times? For carrying heavy stuff/scaring away sexual predators etc.? You are like a bouncer or something to her. You'll always be her bodyguard. Did you ever know that you're her hero? You're everything that she would like to be.