Dodecahedrons-- Why? (694 hits)
Category: PoliticsRating: 1.2 on 10 reviews (Rate this item) (V)
Submitted by DemoLocke (View user info) at 2004-10-28 13:54:26 EDT
Long renowned as a three-dimensional shape, the dodecahedron has come under recent fire by protest groups across the nation. Touted on the nightly news as the second coming of the triangle, the average citizen may be unaware of the recent controversy surrounding the pervasive presence of dodecahedrons in American public classrooms.
Most dominantly in 7th grade math classes across the nation, students are being forced to create these monstrosities for extra credit, only to have them hung from the ceiling days later. What do the students gain from all this? The victims tell an interesting tale:
"This failed to prepare me for the real world," said 11-year old Tyler Ronald* of Witchita, KS*, gazing despairingly to the ceiling where his so-called project was on display.
Other students were not so pessimistic. "They're OK," Alice Gregiore offered of the dodecahedron. "Though I don't think they should be singled out like they have been recently."
One theory in particular has been catching fire throughout the halls of a Redmond, WA middle school. Said one student who wished to remain anonymous, "It's similar to that week we spent learning how to spell 'antidisestablishmentarianism', a-n-t-i-d-, well, I actually haven't done it in a while."
Continued Ronald: "Dodecahedrons are in the curriculum mainly to give us the impression of being smart. Similarly, throw the words 'dodecahedron' and 'I made a' into a sentence at a party and you're bound to score some tail." Little did he know that all students interviewed were kept anonymous, by default.
* All names and locations have been changed to protect the identities of the victims and their families
User Reviews
Submitted by MaximusPadus (user info) at 2004-10-28 22:37:57 EDT (#)
Ranking: 1
Late cousin of the soccer ball.
Submitted by domenad (user info) at 2004-10-28 20:50:27 EDT (#)
Ranking: 1
You fucking IDIOT! We learned about dodecahedronso that when you play Planescape: Torment you know what it is when you find it!
Good satire.
Submitted by Snark (user info) at 2004-10-28 20:48:17 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
Very well written
Submitted by WhatTheHell (user info) at 2004-10-28 14:26:05 EDT (#)
Ranking: 0
Hey I got an idea!!
Try to work the word "GOFUCKYOURSELF" into a story next time, mmmmmkay ?
Submitted by thaumaturge (user info) at 2004-10-28 14:08:49 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
Nice.
TheOnion.com would be proud as hell.
Submitted by wookie (user info) at 2004-10-28 14:07:16 EDT (#)
Ranking: 1
No Comment
Submitted by freebie (user info) at 2004-10-28 14:01:16 EDT (#)
Ranking: 0
I ilkes this.
Submitted by bignasty (user info) at 2004-10-28 14:00:01 EDT (#)
Ranking: 1
No Maggie....DO-DEC-A-HEDRON
-Lisa Simpson
Submitted by zakalwe (user info) at 2004-10-28 13:59:53 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
"Similarly, throw the words 'dodecahedron' and 'I made a' into a sentence at a party and you're bound to score some tail."
Works for me.
Submitted by comicbookguy (user info) at 2004-10-28 13:57:43 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
Long renowned as a three-dimensional shape, the dodecahedron has come under recent fire by protest groups across the nation. Touted on the nightly news as the second coming of the triangle, the average citizen may be unaware of the recent controversy surrounding the pervasive presence of dodecahedrons in American public classrooms.
BAAAAAAAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA
I have always been suspicious of the dodecahedron.