This Post is the Reason Why People Who Interrupt My Sleep Deserve Death (524 hits)
Category: NoneRating: 1.6 on 5 reviews (Rate this item) (V)
Submitted by Allenson (View user info) at 2004-10-29 03:18:05 EDT
I'm always up late, and today, for some reason, I've been up since early. Yes, early. It's that magical time when people with 'real jobs' go to work, and when sensible folks get their sleep. That said, please excuse the shitty sleep-deprived follow-up to my shitty first post.
Get the -2 DIE's ready....
In the years that followed, the cockroaches were fruitful and they did multiply. And as they multiplied, they evolved. New, grand civilizations rose and fall on the bones of the world of man. Some were vaguely similar to those of humans; some were incomprehensibly bizarre. But all had one thing in common: they were free from the taint of mankind and his hatred of all things.
Years pass. As the small once-blue planet spins through the void, it begins to heal. Tiny clusters of cells writhe deep within stagnant water, the first beginnings of new life. Miniscule green shoots begin to hesitantly dot the globe.
The world's masters watch this all with mild amusement. They know the destiny of this new life. It is a destiny that their forefathers rose up to claim when the great mammals ended their short existence. A destiny they cannot stand in the way of, however they might try. And so, evolution recreates itself, under the careful supervision of the masters, who dare not interfere lest they meet the fate of their predecessors.
Then, the unthinkable happens. Against all odds, a certain species of ape has bred true, producing, each generation, offspring more cunning, standing more erect, and decidedly less hairy. It seems that there shall be no peace for this fragile, blue world, as Cro-Magnons rebuild the first tools of destruction. They craft clubs and spears, and build fires to protect themselves from the harsh world, but the masters know where it will lead. Psychotic mammals will once again rule the world, and they will be fated to one day destroy it. The cycle of creation, bizarre though it is, cannot be stopped.
There is talk among the masters of slaughtering these primitive men, but this is discarded in the end. And so it was that the cockroaches fled, they knew not where to, nor if they would ever have cause to return. But they left behind a small sampling of their original breeds, to repopulate, and rebuild the world once more when the time came.
Now one might ask, "How could a civilization so advanced and different from our own disappear so completely without our knowledge?" The answer is: it didn't. We are left with their stories, filtered so thoroughly from generations of verbal retelling that all their meaning is lost. Stories of Thor and Loki, Zeus and Athena, Gilgamesh and Enkidu, Sundiata and Sumaoro, Jesus and Satan, legends of lost Atlantis and its riches, all these hold a grain of truth about the descendents of tenacious household pests.
By the way, it's the middle of the night and I've got no damn ramen left. I'll be damned if I'm going to scrounge up change so I can go to the store and buy 20 cents worth of flavored sodium at 3 a.m. So instead I'll just sit here and bitch.
Moral of the story-COCKROACHES OWN!!!!
But only because the fuckers are FUCKING SCARY...don't deny it....
User Reviews
Submitted by jack11058 (user info) at 2004-10-31 03:19:58 EST (#)
Ranking: 2
This was good.
Submitted by Socialist_Joe (user info) at 2004-10-31 02:39:22 EST (#)
Ranking: 1
sleep is the cousin of death
Submitted by Sofa_Ace (user info) at 2004-10-29 11:09:36 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
+2 because I read "interrupt" as "interpret" and thought to mself "what the fuck does this have to do with dream interpretation?". It would be kind of wierd if this was about dream interpretation though, because last night I had dream that I died, then this morning i woke up dead. Now who says that shit isn't accurate?
Submitted by tinactin (user info) at 2004-10-29 03:26:53 EDT (#)
Ranking: 1
Stick to it. Your writing style isnt bad, although this post didn't really interest me.
Submitted by DJMattB241 (user info) at 2004-10-29 03:21:48 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
i can't deny it.