Fat Tony's goomba guide to tipping & bribery (updated) (3557 hits)
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Submitted by Fat Tony (View user info) at 2004-10-29 19:10:28 EDT
Who deserves a tip? Who don't deserve a tip? Society makes it seem unethical & ruthless. Even a small crime. Fuck that! If a server doesn't do their job properly, do they deserve a tip? Sure, it's added in the bill, an extra 20% and they'll make it seem like a law. There is no law that says you've got to tip a waiter. Listed below is my list of who deserves a tip and more importantly who doesn't deserve a tip.
WHO DESERVES A TIP
BARTENDERS: Unlike a snobby waiter at a restaurant, the barkeep will actually give you something in return for your tip.What will it get you? A longer pour, a stiffer drink, the occasional "on da house pal", your drink never hits bottom and they're always around if you need anything.
WAITRESS AT A CLUB: Definitely deserves a tip. Unless you want to fight your way to the bar every 20 minutes then try to get the bartenders attention with a "Yo buddy!". Tip the waitress well and she'll always come around just when you want her. Your drinks will get top priority and they may even be a lil stronger then average.
DOORMAN: Of course you tip the doorman. Slip him a $20 every time you come in and regardless of VIP list, lines, dress codes, tickets only, whatever it is, the velvet rope will part and bad-a-bing you're in while the well dressed asshole gets mad "I've been in line 30 minutes!". Kiss my ass buddy. Seen a hottie in line? "Yo, she's with me" and bam! She's in too. Ice breaker, she's impressed because you got her in without a wait. Rest is up to you. By the third time you go to the club, you can cut the line (so long as there's a Jackson in your palm as you shake hands with the doorman).
CASINO: Always tip pitboss. ALWAYS, no exceptions. He's got the pull to get you perks beyond your imagination. There's lots of times I walk into a crowded casino in L.A. and I get seated the second I walk on the floor. Sure there's a 1 hour wait for a 3-6 hold'em table, but not for me. Meals? I never paid for a meal in a casino in 15 years. Why? I tip the pitboss. I get something for my money and I'm loose with it when there's something in it for me. From comp cigars to comp meals and drinks, anything I want in the Commerce/Bicycle casino is mine. I've even switched dealers because "I don't like her fucking face, get her off my table". What did they say? "Right away Tone, this is her last hand". Shows? I never paid for a ticket. Why? The pit boss has complimentary tickets to give to high rollers. Am I a high roller? Shit no, I just know who to tip. Fifth row center. Ahhhh! (this will not work in Vegas, too big, too many people for you to get noticed/remembered. Local casino, no problem)
HOST: Restaurant is usually packed? If you go there often slip him a 5 or 10 and you'll never wait. First time? It does nothing for you, forget it.
SERVER: IF! Only if he/she does her job. Attitude? Have to ask more then once for a refill or spoon? Deduction. Servers think they are Gods. Let them eat shit. Work for your tip dammit. Server fucks up then says sorry? Hey, everyone makes mistakes NO DEDUCTION. Server gives you a dessert and tells you it's off the bill or forgets to put it on the bill? Tip the dessert amount & 20%. Server has attitude, treats you like shit. Fuck em, nothing. Get manager. Never get pressured into tipping when you don't feel like it. There is NO LAW that says you must tip, regardless what the restaurant owner or anyone says. There is no law in any state that says you gotta tip. If there is, then I'd like to see it.
SERVICE DEPARTMENT AT CAR DEALER: Always tip this guy! OMG if you are going to tip anybody, it's the guy at the service department. Drive up, tell him what's the matter tell him very plainly and very directly "do the best you can and I'll take care of you when I pick up my car". They all know what this means and you will get royal treatment. The loaner car is out, but take this one. Free detail. Free shampoo. Problem wasn't under warranty, but he pulls a few strings to get it taken care of free of charge. Instead of rebuilding the AC unit as stated in the contract, I made them install a brand new one for you. You get all kinds of shit from the service department. Tip him well. I say the minimum is $50 and cap is a hundred (or more depending what kind of car). I've gotten a LOT of stuff for my money at service departments. Treat him well, always go back to the same guy, service only gets better from there. Never switch guys. Call make sure "your guy" is there. Ever hear the expression "I got a guy" and you get amazed. Know how he got that guy? Fat Tony's guide to tipping & bribing, that's how.
MOVERS: They are getting paid by the hour. They are charging you an obscene amount of money to move your belongings from point A to point B. You offer to take care of them if they can help you out with the time card. If they say sure, then guess what? You need to tip their ass royally. For every hour he takes off of the card, that's an extra $35-$50 off of your bill. Tip 50% of what he saves you. Saved you $150 off your bill? He deserves $75 minimum. Most of these guys are more then happy to work on the side. Get his phone number, next time somebody needs to move you can say "I got a guy". They didn't do anything special for you? Fuck em, they get nothing.
AIRPORT: Always tip the skycap. ALWAYS! You're going to Phoenix and your bag is in Jersey. Why? Forgot to tip the SKYCAP! Arriving from a flight? Skycap gets your bags, say thank you muthafucka and load your bags. He gets nothing, he is like a lion with a broken jaw, harmless. Remember, DEPARTURE = TIP, ARRIVAL = FINGER.
SPORTING EVENT: It's the 7th inning/4th quarter and 1/3 of the people left. Usually the usher will not let you in the good seats without a stub. When they ask to see your stub, show them a 5 or 10. Tadaa. Open seating. Keep going to the same guy, you can go earlier in the game to the abandoned seats. Dodger stadium, we usually buy right field $7 seats. When you go to the gate where the humans sit, there's sombody watching. Tell them you want Krispy Kreme or whatever food is on that side and they let you thu. Make it to sections 1,7,12, or 13 (right behind home plate) and look for an old man (seating usher) with a navy tat on his forearm, "Pops!" It's $10 per seat. He'll show you where to sit, only works after the 3'rd inning.
BUYING A NEW CAR: You tip/bribe the finance manager (not the salesman). You really want this new car, but the interest rate over the life of the loan is kicking your ass. Man, just a few shaved points off of my interest rate and I can easily afford this. Guess what? Finance managers get tipped from the bank when they reel in a big fish. Once the salesman tells you "This is as low as we can go, there is nothing else we can do for you" then ask for the finance manager. Offer him a minimum of $250 to see if he can drop your interest rate down, let him know it's in cash and if he gets a dynamite deal you'll go as high as $500. The finance manager then takes a 5 minute break and comes back with the actual interest rate the bank offered you. Your $250 is in cash, the $400 or $500 from the bank is in check and goes on the taxes, etc. Now, if the finance manager only knocks off a point or two, ask him "which bank is that with" remember the name he tells you and walk the fuck out. Go to the next dealer and apply again, same bank will pick you up (bank could care less which dealer you buy from). Approach the finance manager again and repeat. I've done it 10 times, works like magic.
NOTE ON TIPPINIG/BRIBING FINANCE MANAGER
My wife's brother is a finance manager at a huge Dodge dealer. When he proposes a loan to the bank, (if it's a bank he's dealt with a few times) will tell him "We'll finance him at 7%, but would more comfortable if you can sign him at 10%+". What this translates to is PAYOLA. The finance manager will push for the higher interest rate, and get a nice gratuity from the bank if signed at a higher rate. NOW! When you are at rock bottom and can't get a better deal on your car, that's when you have a lil sit down with the finance manager. Work your best deal, then talk to him last. When you propose your indecent offer, he will take into consideration the cash now or the gratuity from the bank in 2 months, or he will consider both. 99% of the time your interest rate will go down considerably. Think about it. If he saves you 2% on your loan over 4 years, that's a few grand. Well worth a few hundred bucks. Even is he saves you $25 per month, it's still worth two hundred, after 8 payments you are saving money. Oh, and a side note. Got 5G's for a down payment. Tell them you only got 3. Then go 3500, then 38, etc. Never tell them you got 5Gs for a down cause they'll ALWAYS want more.
NURSES AT HOSPITAL: Oh yes. Let's say your wife is having a baby or your grandmother is having surgery. Be nice to the nurses, bring a box of candy, ask them if you can order them a pizza, etc. and watch how they don't come in your room to tell you "visiting hours are now over". Works every time. Be a prick, nurse will be there 5 minutes before visiting hours are over and she'll make sure you leave. Be cool, be smooth, be polite, you can stay as long as you don't make noise. Works every time. This works in reverse also, don't like the person you're visiting and wanna leave early? Ask "Hey, are you the head nurse?" When she says no, "I thought you was because your knees were dirty". You'll be thrown out in minutes.
YOUR GARDENER: If the guy is self employed, fuck him he's already over charging your ass.. If it's a company and they got employees doing the work, then you always tip the gardener. When you "Take care" of them, they take care of you in return. Fertilizer at no extra charge. Minor tree trimming at no extra charge. Extra care when cleaning up. All because of a five or ten here and there. Remember, these guys don't even make the minimum wage, they are illegal and work like slaves for $30 a day. Your extra 5 or 10 means meat in them thar burritos! How often to tip? Once or twice a month and let them know it's an ongoing thing. Got a huge yard? Tip him every time he comes over. Grass is greener, flowers are alive, tree isn't attacking your house with rogue limbs. All because of a lil grease.
BODY SHOP: Your car is damaged. You already agreed on a price to fix it. Find out what day it's getting banged out and talk to the repair guy. Slip him a $50 and tell him to fix this ding, that scratch, etc. Find out what day it's being painted then come over and talk to the painter. Slip him $50 and watch that mutha shine. Never tip the salesman or manager, they will do nothing except enjoy your money. The guys that actually do the work deserve the tip. Be sneaky, be cool, be smooth. Like ya need something from your car.
THE DJ: Wedding? Party? Always tip the DJ, he's there because he agreed to be there for a specific amount. He'll spin regardless of your tip. BUT! Your tip will get him to stay a lil longer, play a lil stronger and get everyone in a par-tay mood. "I tipped the DJ and he didn't do anything special" That's because you tossed him a fiver you jackass. Take a $20 out of your pocket, then go to a few friends and have them chip in a few fives, a few ones, then put it in the DJ's hand. Amazingly the songs get better.
DOING SOMETHING TO YOUR HOUSE: Remodeling? Just painting the house? Laying down carpet? You need these guys on your side like they are marines and you are behind enemy lines. Slip each of them a minimum of $20 (20 is low, if you can, do 50) and watch how much better the days work goes. You'll get some minor free work done, some extras, and they'll care just a lil bit more about their work. If you're a big shot, get them to eat & drink and then start getting bitchy on their ass. Whatever you want is a few bucks away and completely off the books. Manager wanted $500 to knock down a wall? Slip the boys $30 each and a few Subway sammiches and it's done for under a hundred. Want the other room painted, but it's not on contract? Slip em a few bucks, buy some food, some beers, and 5 extra gallons of paint. Whadda ya know, room is painted for 70% less then original quote. Tip em well enough, they'll work for you on the side cutting the bosses prices by 50% or more. Be careful, some contractors/painters are family operated. Then you tip gets you Zip.
GOPHER: Most offices have one. Go for coffee, go for lunch, get me this, get me that. Shit job. Take care of Gopher and he'll take care of you. Give gopher an attitude, he'll forget whatcha want. Ever notice how some people get taken care of while others get shitted on? I wanted a plain bagel, not poppy seed! They tipped gopher.
CABLE GUY: Tip him only if he's willing to do something extra for you. Otherwise fuck him, he's of no use to you and your future list of "guys".
HOOKER: She wants $30? Offer her $40 and hold on. Do I need to explain this one?
TEACHER: You usually bribe your kids teacher with being nice, sending a card, a ($20) basket of flowers, soaps, etc. On the holiday, etc. If your lil bastard does something wrong or is failing, you'll get a lil help from the teacher if you kiss her ass. Yes, kissing ass goes against my rules, but if my kids are involved there are no rules.
NAIL SALON: When you droop off your woman (like any good man should) wait for your woman to go to the bathroom (they always gotta pee when they go to the salon, give her 5 minutes). When she's gone go to the Chinese broad at the counter, slip her $50 to $100 and tell her to give your woman "the works". Only do this if you want kinky sex. Wife thinks she's getting her nails done. Next thing ya know, there's a Gook broad doing her feet, waxing her face, etc. Women love attention.
THE GUY YOU BUY WEED FROM: You always end up arguing with this guy. Why? Cause you a cheap pot head that's why. Pay his first price, slip him an extra 5er, by the third buy, the Maui Waui or Chocolate Tiestick will magically become available. If he's got homegrown pissweed, he's got Super Weed too, trust me.
TRAVEL AGENT: The travel agent has guidelines to follow. Trip to NYC is $800 and there's nothing she can do about it. Yeah right. Tell her it's worth a hundred for a lower rate and she'll end up giving you the direct coupon code for the $500 flight. She makes money per sale. Give her the money she'd make on the sale and you'll get the tickets at cost. Most travel agencies are family owned & operated, be careful. This does not work on huge artsy fartsy agencies. Small lil hole in the wall? No problem.
CAR STEREO INSTALLER: Dayum straight. The bitch at the counter tells you it's $65 for installation, $20 for harness, $20 for adapter, blah blah blah. Try to go to the back, talk to the installer, offer him 50 on the side and 9 times out of 10 he'll give you his home number. They only pay the installer $10 per hour, it's a 2 hour job and the harness is like 3 bucks.
ANYBODY WITH A LIL BIT O PULL: All these people above have a certain pull. You want something from them and they have the power to give you more then what you paid for. If they don't give you more, they get nothing. If they do something for you for free, then tip up the ass. But if they're already getting paid and don't agree to do anything "more" for you, fuck em.
EVEN THE PAPER BOY: Yes, tip this lil sombitch. No more then a buck a month. Your paper will appear within 3 feet of your porch or in your fucking box. If he has freckles, don't give him shit, he's the devil or Irish, both the same thing.
CAR DETAIL: Sure, pay the check. Then go to the guy who is doing the work and slip him a 5 or 10 before he begins (if you do it after, it gets you nothing, get to him before he starts) and tell him to do a nice job. The Q tip will go between your speaker grill to gather the extra dust.
RUG SHAMPOO: You agree on a price for the entire room. Tell him you'll tip him if he does a good job and uses extra soap. Magically your carpet will be like new. That machine is inside a van and makes more noise then a 747. You mean it can't get out that piss stain? Yes it can, slip him a 5er and watch the piss vanish.
COMPUTER GEEK: Taking your PC in for a tuneup? Sure the counter girl is cute, but ask to speak to the tech and let him know that if it gets done early and blah blah blah (what ever you need) he'll get taken care of. Tadaa! Two weeks is now 72 hours!
When you tip, be smooth. Don't pull out a wad of bills and flick thru them like you're looking for a single. Have the money in your pocket, then in a hand shake slip it and make eye contact. You're not actually tipping, you're bribing. Bribes get you more then tips.
WHO DOES NOT DESERVE A TIP:
STARBUCKS: Why do they have a tip jar? One grande latte, $34.95 and they have the nerve to put out a tip jar. Does that get you anything except a smile from the cute girl who wouldn't otherwise look at you? No, it gets you shit. Not even one fucking penny for a tip jar at a coffee place. They're getting paid. They have on clothes. Save your buck for the bum outside who is freezing. There is no good reason to tip at Starbucks. They're young, they're healthy, if they don't like it let them get a better job.
VALET PARKING: Go git my car muthafucker! You applied for this job, you got it, you are getting paid for it. STFU and get my car. Don't touch my CDs or change in the ashtray bitch. You paid for parking, he's getting paid to park your car, he is useless to you. Why tip him? UNLESS! You go there a lot.
DELIVERY GUY: Got new furniture? It's his job to bring it in and set it up. Fuck him, he gets nothing.
PIZZA GUY: Iroc driving, zit face sombitch wants my two dollars? Suck my cock. You get nothing. Even if you're on time. You're getting paid, you have a nice car, you get free pizza. Save your buck for a bum who needs it. There is no reason to tip this freak.
GUN CLUB: I only go to one gun club and people tip this kid all the time. He looks at me like I'm a shit. It's skeet. You say PULL and he pushes a button. People tip this guy $5 and $10 per round. Why? He pushes a button sitting on his ass waiting for you to say PULL. Not a hard job, don't give you anything else for your money. Fuck him.
HOTEL: Fuck em. Bellboy, bellcap, manager, worthless and can do nothing for you. Room Service? $15 for a burger and you want a tip? Fuck you.
CASINO DEALER: He has no pull. Regardless what TV or friends tell you, he is useless. Curse his mother, tell him to suck your cock, he's harmless. You're expected and allowed to curse a dealer. The casino will do nothing to a person who verbally assaults a dealer. They pay the dealer. You pay the casino. No contest.
FOOD COURT: HA! Fuck em. They do nothing for you.
TIP JAR: At a counter, nothing pisses me off more then a tip jar at a counter. Bagels, coffee, oy! You don't deserve it. You are getting paid an hourly wage. Do a better job and you'll get better pay, even a cashiers position. Fuck tip jars. You chose to work there. You wanted that job, you got it, now get my bagel/pizza/coffee/counter food dammit! Don't be pressured by tip jars.
OIL CHANGE: Why? Some people say to tip them. Never fucking happen. Next.
THE WATER GUY: Oh yeah, like he's gonna get a tip. Do you get a free bottle of water from him? No. Does he take away your empties? Yes! THAT'S HIS JOB. He knew what he was getting into when he applied. Short pants wearing water jockey gets shit from me. I even give him some shit. NO NOT THERE! MOVE THOSE BOTTLES OVER 2 FEET! And he does it. Stupid bitch.
REAL ESTATE AGENT: They make enough money off of your purchase/sale. Fuck them. Don't even invite them to dinner afterward. They made 5 digits off your hard working ass, they should tip/bribe you. Bastards.
SERVERS/WAITERS: Attitude? Give them attitude right back. ZERO tip. Leave a dime just to prove you didn't forget. You are paying, they should not give you attitude. They should kiss your ass a lil bit if they expect something from you. Muthafuckers.
POLICE: Yes they deserve a tip/bribe but it's not worth it. They'll take what they want from you if they're corrupt. Otherwise you're just adding to your troubles.
CAR WASH: Wetback just dried your car and he has the nerve to stick his hand out for a tip? He is in America and got a job. He's useless to you. Yet he did a good job? Hmmm. Well, if he didn't do a good job, he wouldn't have a job. Fuck him.
UPS FEDEX: Fuck em. The got jobs, they got benefits, they got health insurance. ZIP.
PIZZA PARLOR: Why tip? Cheap food, fast. McDonalds. Ya don't tip him and he special makes it for you?
CLEANING LADY/MAID: Prolly a wetback pretends not to speeeeek english. She'll steal if given the chance. Why tip her?
CHAMBER MAID: People started tipping the maid who cleans your hotel room? Do you tip your mother? Do you tip your wife/girl friend? Why tip this bitch. Unless she makes you a burger and sucks your cock, then she is just doing her job. Anything she finds is hers anyway and you know you forgot something in the room. Never tip the maid at a hotel. Want extra towels and shampoo? Go outside dumbass. They are right there on her cart.
THE GUY WHO SHOWS YOU TO YOUR SEAT: Some people usually tip this person. Why? Did he get you a good seat? Did he do anything for you? You have a predetermined seat and he showed you where it is, that's his job that he gets paid for. Now, if you're not happy with that seat, you simply ask "Can you get me a better seat? I'll make it worth your time". If he does anything for you, sure he deserves a tip.
MAIL CARRIER: Can you believe this shit? People actually tip the mail man. Why is it custom to tip somebody who is already doing their job? To show your appreciation? Here's my appreciation muthafucker, I wont call your supervisor and tell them what a shit job you're doing bitch. Gimme my mail muthafucker. Oh, have a nice day :)
MALL: Anything you do at the mall does not deserve a tip. Perfume (they're supposed to give you samples it's company policy), food court, gap, pay for what you got and nothing more.
ANY SALESMAN: That tells you he is working on a percentage and needs this sale. Really? How much ya making? $250? Wow. Tell ya what, if you need this sale, split the percentage with me and I'll buy it, otherwise I'll come back tomorrow and talk to the other guy? :) See what he says then.
There it is. Fat Tony's guide to tipping & bribery. Usually you ask before you bribe, after you do it 7 or 8 times you get a feel for who's buyable and who's loyal. Stay away from the loyal ones. What ever it is you're doing there's usually a bribe option to you. Not sure if it's family run business? Ask. "You like workin here?" That opens the door, if they say "workin with family is good/bad" then you know not to even attepmt bribery. Usually eye contact with the simple phrase "Can ya help me out a little?". People in a position to get bribed always know what this means. Think you should be on the bribe list?
User Reviews
Submitted by FALLEN (user info) at 2007-08-22 13:34:20 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
Gold,
so noted, thanks T.
Submitted by Deamon (user info) at 2005-03-22 02:15:51 EST (#)
Ranking: 2
Bike Techs and Ski Techs like 6 packs.
We do a better job and you can hang around and drink with us.
Submitted by peckerhead (user info) at 2005-02-07 20:38:44 EST (#)
Ranking: 2
Submitted by great_angst (user info) at 2004-10-29 22:17:35 (#)
Ranking: 1
WTF I JUST READ ALL THAT
Very (very) good post -- but then (as always) have to throw in the racist bullshit near the end. It doesn't add anything to the quality or point of the post ... it just makes you sound like a bigot (less so than some of your previous posts, though). I doubt you give a fuck, but some of us do.
That said, good reading and advice. Made me smile (reluctantly) +1
___________________________________________________________________________
great_angst: You and a few others criticize Fat Tony (politely in your case) but consider this: He calls himself "FAT Tony". I am aware of schools where calling someone "fat" will land you in serious trouble because of Discrimination. Maybe Tony does make some racist remarks but in a way he is consistent or non-hypocritical by labelling himself Fat. I guess what I am trying to say is enjoy the funny parts when and where you can and let the rest go - if possible. People who are very sensitive to racist remarks and personal criticism probably shouldn't come here. I understand that those who go TOO far eventually get banned from the site. All that aside, I found this one mostly funny :-)
Submitted by Freight_Train (user info) at 2005-01-13 19:00:21 EST (#)
Ranking: 2
I learned something new
Submitted by thecaes (user info) at 2005-01-05 21:53:23 EST (#)
Ranking: 2
That was informative.
Submitted by BoogieFevuh (user info) at 2004-11-28 16:43:10 EST (#)
Ranking: 2
You, sir, are doing a valuable service to the community, and I thank you.
Submitted by polyamorousaj (user info) at 2004-11-01 12:09:43 EST (#)
Ranking: 2
Holy shit, I read the whole thing. The paper boy bit was good, but this right here was fucking hilarious: "Ask "Hey, are you the head nurse?" When she says no, "I thought you was because your knees were dirty". You'll be thrown out in minutes."
Submitted by tidalfae (user info) at 2004-11-01 11:45:08 EST (#)
Ranking: 1
Not tipping people who bring you food = spit ( or something worse ) in your food. Always tip anyone bringing you food if there is even the remotest chance that they will be in the vicinity of your food in the future. Delivery guys have a ridiclously good memory for where they got screwed over, and they are more thank happy to return the favour.
Submitted by domenad (user info) at 2004-10-30 14:16:29 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
Long. And useful. Just like me.
Submitted by FatTony (user info) at 2004-10-30 14:09:25 EDT (#)
Ranking: 0
Julia: If sombody tells you "I got a guy" whether you're moving, doing some painting or etc. You
always ask details. Does he work on the side, is he self employed, is it a family business, etc.
If he's self employed, a bribe/tip does nothing for you. If he works on the side, charm, personality
and a little extra cash do wonders.
Submitted by AvrilLaPete (user info) at 2004-10-30 11:45:19 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
Hey degreeless... SHUT THE FUCK UP...
Oh, and nice post. Took some time I can tell.
Submitted by creep_firebombing (user info) at 2004-10-30 08:51:37 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
Fat Tony's the dad I never had.
Submitted by great_angst (user info) at 2004-10-29 22:17:35 EDT (#)
Ranking: 1
WTF I JUST READ ALL THAT
Very (very) good post -- but then (as always) have to throw in the racist bullshit near the end. It doesn't add anything to the quality or point of the post ... it just makes you sound like a bigot (less so than some of your previous posts, though). I doubt you give a fuck, but some of us do.
That said, good reading and advice. Made me smile (reluctantly) +1
Submitted by spedmonkey (user info) at 2004-10-29 21:48:42 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
Yep.
Submitted by Julia (user info) at 2004-10-29 21:42:56 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
Informative. Question for you. If someone gives me the name of his "guy" (plumber, mechanic, whoever), should I assume he's tipping the guy and do the same? Do you think the guy expects a tip from me if my tipping friend referred me to him?
Submitted by jack11058 (user info) at 2004-10-29 21:05:26 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
Great ideas, but I didn't appreciate the racism, you wop dago piece of crap.
Submitted by Degreeless_Capibara (user info) at 2004-10-29 20:27:24 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
LOLZRZ
Submitted by Degreeless_Capibara (user info) at 2004-10-29 20:27:14 EDT (#)
Ranking: -2
SHUT UP FATASS
Submitted by Degreeless_Capibara (user info) at 2004-10-29 20:27:05 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
In Deutschland, the tip is included in the receipt.
Submitted by Degreeless_Capibara (user info) at 2004-10-29 20:26:41 EDT (#)
Ranking: 0
WTF IM NOT READING ALL THAT!
Submitted by Degreeless_Capibara (user info) at 2004-10-29 20:26:38 EDT (#)
Ranking: 0
WTF IM NOT READING ALL THAT!
Submitted by mikethescottish (user info) at 2004-10-29 20:26:36 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
Good stuff- though tipping is a pretty rare practise over in the UK.
Submitted by Degreeless_Capibara (user info) at 2004-10-29 20:26:34 EDT (#)
Ranking: 0
WTF IM NOT READING ALL THAT!
Submitted by Degreeless_Capibara (user info) at 2004-10-29 20:26:32 EDT (#)
Ranking: 0
WTF IM NOT READING ALL THAT!
Submitted by Degreeless_Capibara (user info) at 2004-10-29 20:26:30 EDT (#)
Ranking: 0
WTF IM NOT READING ALL THAT!
Submitted by Degreeless_Capibara (user info) at 2004-10-29 20:26:28 EDT (#)
Ranking: 0
WTF IM NOT READING ALL THAT!
Submitted by Degreeless_Capibara (user info) at 2004-10-29 20:26:25 EDT (#)
Ranking: 0
WTF IM NOT READING ALL THAT!
Submitted by Degreeless_Capibara (user info) at 2004-10-29 20:26:22 EDT (#)
Ranking: 0
WTF IM NOT READING ALL THAT!
Submitted by Degreeless_Capibara (user info) at 2004-10-29 20:26:20 EDT (#)
Ranking: 0
WTF IM NOT READING ALL THAT!
Submitted by Degreeless_Capibara (user info) at 2004-10-29 20:26:17 EDT (#)
Ranking: 0
WTF IM NOT READING ALL THAT!
Submitted by Degreeless_Capibara (user info) at 2004-10-29 20:26:13 EDT (#)
Ranking: 0
WTF IM NOT READING ALL THAT!
Submitted by Degreeless_Capibara (user info) at 2004-10-29 20:26:10 EDT (#)
Ranking: 0
WTF IM NOT READING ALL THAT!
Submitted by Random Joe at 2004-10-29 20:19:29 EDT (#)
Ranking: -2
Fucking die you fat fucking moronic obeise asshole American.
Submitted by Tigre (user info) at 2004-10-29 20:01:36 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
I almost shat myself laughing..4 times.
You need to add welders/blacksmiths. It's not hard to leave a little flaw in your car, or in the plumbing in your home. Give us $20, and you'll get the smoothest, most streamline weld you've ever seen.
Submitted by Sepsis (user info) at 2004-10-29 19:55:40 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
No Comment
Submitted by CoachMagirk27 (user info) at 2004-10-29 19:51:27 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
goomba guide = +2
Submitted by Kristen (user info) at 2004-10-29 19:41:29 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
I actually laughed out loud a couple times. LOLWTFOMG!!1
Do you really say "bada-bing" in your every day life?
Submitted by kai070169 (user info) at 2004-10-29 19:39:02 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
Nice update.
Submitted by nitty34 (user info) at 2004-10-29 19:35:51 EDT (#)
Ranking: 1
-2 because this was done before, and I got shitted on for a repost.
+2 because you said to tip bartenders.
+1 because the new shit made me laugh like hell.
Very fine work, sir.
Submitted by Phinch (user info) at 2004-10-29 19:35:19 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
some good advice there.
Submitted by Degreeless_Capibara (user info) at 2004-10-29 19:18:56 EDT (#)
Ranking: -2
Didn't you make this a long time ago? Or was it Lisa? Whatever, it still sucked.
Submitted by Adamdidit2u (user info) at 2004-10-29 19:17:16 EDT (#)
Ranking: 2
THE GUY YOU BUY WEED FROM: You always end up arguing with this guy. Why? Cause you a cheap pot head that's why. Pay his first price, slip him an extra 5er, by the third buy, the Maui Waui or Chocolate Tiestick will magically become available. If he's got homegrown pissweed, he's got Super Weed too, trust me.
ohhh yea