Bush wins it! (692 hits)
Category: NoneRating: 0.89 on 10 reviews (Rate this item) (V)
Submitted by Fox (View user info) at 2004-11-02 10:10:54 EST
Voters upset the Democratic party today by re-electing Bush. In a speech given shortly after his reelection, Bush said "you haven't seen anything yet". Despite the ambiguity of this statement, republicans nation wide still thing he will "do okay", and also say "Kerry is a pussy, he only got shot three times. If Bush had gone and fought, he would have taken ninety bullets before going home. Fortunately Bush knew where his allegiances lie and chose to stay here, in America, during the war". Simply amazing. Lets look at the breakdown of how the states voted starting with the obvious:
Kerry:
Washington
Oregon
California
Maine
Michigan
Illinois
New York
Rhode Island
Vermont
All the other shit eater, New England states
Florida
Bush:
All the big states in the middle
Texas
Georgia
The southeast, excluding Florida
Some other states that no one cares about
The startling upset came when Bush stole (literally, the guys a thief) Ohio, Pennsylvania, and new hamster (sp?) pushing him over the edge at 272 electoral votes. Iraqi citizens are in despair over the election, understanding that Bush has intentions to kill and maim more of their women and children.
Civil rights activists say that all hell is about to break loose. And as if to prove their claim, the earth did split open near D.C. and a large, reddish man climbed out of the hole. Some Christians claim this is Satan himself, but Bush refutes these this, saying that the man is "my good friend from the south... The Deep South". Adam sandler tried to sue Bush for stealing his uncomedic line from the movie "Little Nicky", but was stricken by the black plague and died several minutes later. The world is glad to be rid of him.
User Reviews
Submitted by abefroman42 (user info) at 2004-11-09 17:36:44 EST (#)
Ranking: -2
derka derka derka. muhammad jihad.
Submitted by idiot at 2004-11-05 11:17:00 EST (#)
Ranking: -2
No Comment
Submitted by strider (user info) at 2004-11-02 15:49:03 EST (#)
Ranking: -2
congrats! your first -2 on this post!
Submitted by Zandy1123 (user info) at 2004-11-02 13:31:20 EST (#)
Ranking: 2
I was gonna -2 you for this line: "All the other shit eater, New England states"
But then I kept reading...clearly, you're anti-Bush...right?
please?
Submitted by Kristen (user info) at 2004-11-02 11:51:37 EST (#)
Ranking: 2
Bush refutes these this, eh?
Funny stuff, even though you grouped the state I live in under "some other states that no one cares about."
Submitted by firefly (user info) at 2004-11-02 10:46:39 EST (#)
Ranking: 2
No Comment
Submitted by Loren1 (user info) at 2004-11-02 10:44:39 EST (#)
Ranking: 1
new hamster....
HAHAHAHAHAHA! I love it.
Submitted by miss_behvn (user info) at 2004-11-02 10:33:55 EST (#)
Ranking: 2
funny
Submitted by Adamdidit2u (user info) at 2004-11-02 10:22:34 EST (#)
Ranking: 2
That was good
Remember to "Rock the vote!"
or umm...
"Vote or die!"
fuck it..
just go here
http://www.ubersite.com/m/50351
Submitted by X-File (user info) at 2004-11-02 10:16:48 EST (#)
Ranking: 1
+1 For a Adam Sadler being killed by the black death.