I just can't throw them away (How Nicole will end up killing herself) (832 hits)
Category: NoneRating: 1.82 on 25 reviews (Rate this item) (V)
Submitted by Nicole <nakita963.at.yahoo.com> (View user info) at 2004-11-18 09:59:45 EST
In December 2002 I was invited to the pre-opening party for a bar. I put on a cute little outfit, my brand-spanking-new pair of 4" spiky black boots and headed out. I sat at the bar with a couple friends, Chris (female) and Joe, and chatted with the bartender and other people while having a few drinks, all on the house. Yes, I was a bit tipsy, but nothing serious.
At some point my bladder became full so I headed for the restroom, which I found to be occupied. Rather than wait, I headed for another bathroom downstairs. Unfortunately the steps had those metal treads at the edge of the steps that stick up and are supposed to help traction. Well, they hindered my traction a bit as the heel on my left boot caught on the tread and sent me hurtling, face first down the stairs. When I reached the bottom I did a chin plant on the hard floor, cracking it open and spewing blood everywhere. My endorphins are pumping so I don't realize how bad the cut was. I figured I'd just head back upstairs, grab my friends, tell the owner about the mess and then sneak out. So I grabbed a few paper towels to try and staunch the flow and headed upstairs.
My plan didn't last long as when I peaked into the bar and only saw Joe, but I did hear some hurling coming from the kitchen area. Great. The pain had started to creep up by this point, but another round of endorphins was brought on by one look at Chris. There was a trashcan within two feet but she had chosen a food preparation sink to puke in. A food prep sink! As if the pint of blood I had left at the bottom of stairs wasn't bad enough, now there was puke in their sink.
I tried to comfort her as much as I could as she blew chunks while I attempted to wash as much of it down as possible (I have washed and physically smashed more puke down sink drains than I care to remember though I have never committed this horrible faux pas myself). All the commotion drew the bartender to the kitchen. For some reason he found the sight of one girl puking her guts out in a sink while another held her hair with one hand while the other held a bunch of paper towels to her chin as blood dripped down onto her clothes and floor a little bit surprising. For some reason he insisted on looking at the wound even though I assured him it was only a scratch (keep in mind I hadn't seen the wound myself yet). The look on his face when I removed the wad of paper towels told me what I needed to know. My evening was only getting started.
The bartender went and grabbed Joe, our designated driver, and helped the three of us out to our car. If I had my choice I would have driven the extra 10 minutes to a better hospital but I ended up at the emergency room of one of the worst hospitals in the region at one o'clock in the morning. I continued to bleed into a stack of paper towels as the receptionist asked me 100 questions and took care of all of the insurance crap before allowing me to see a doctor. During all of this time, I could hear Chris as she puked in the waiting room restroom. A little bit telling, I would say.
***********************
"Have you been drinking?" Nurse Ratchet asked.
"Yes, I had three drinks. Two beers and gin and tonic over a two hour period," I responded truthfully. I could tell she wasn't buying it but I didn't care. I just wanted sewn up.
"Are you sure?"
"Yes. Absolutely. Joe can verify it." Why in the hell would I lie, anyway? I'm 23 years old and can drink as much as I want.
"Are you pregnant?"
"No."
"Are you sure?"
NO! I'm just fucking with you because I feel like sitting here for a few more minutes in pain bleeding all over myself! "Yes, I'm positive I'm not pregnant. No chance whatsoever."
"Well, we're going to take a blood sample just to be sure." WTF! It isn't like I'm undergoing anesthesia. Just take a needle and some thread and sew up my fucking chin.
**************************
After they took my blood I sat in the hospital bed for 45 minutes before a doctor even came to look at me and I was the only person in the emergency room. Good thing I was only bleeding profusely. Joe did manage to find a mirror while we were waiting and I removed the gauze that they had given me to hold on the wound. At this point things took a turn for the worse. One look and my stomach started to get a little queasy. The more I looked and thought about it the worse I started to feel. Within a few minutes I was now hurling up my cheeseburger dinner. Oh, the fun.
Eventually I was seen by the German accented doctor who didn't feel it necessary to use much anesthetic when we sewed up my chin as I nearly kicked him in the stomach a couple times. He was either an incompetent German (oh, I bet he would have liked to hear that) or Germans think anesthetic is for pussies. Probably a bit of both.
We eventually arrived back at home at 4 am and immediately crashed. In the morning, I took one look at my spiky boots and put them in the back of the closet. Those things were dangerous.
It has now been almost two years and this morning I had an urge. It may find it was an urge to commit suicide, but I gave in anyway and put on those boots for the second time ever. As I was heading out the door this morning, my left foot buckled slightly. Upon closer inspection I found that the heel, the very one that had caused my bloody accident, was very wobbly. Whether it was that way before the accident or catching it on the metal tread had damaged it, I don't know.
For two years I have been waiting to build up the courage to wear these boots again. I couldn't just throw them out. They were brand new. Now that I've put them on I find that they are damaged. I've held on to them for two years. I'm not ready to give up on them just yet. I'm breaking out the epoxy glue.
User Reviews
Submitted by Quartermain (user info) at 2004-11-18 17:36:15 EST (#)
Ranking: 2
Submitted by JMG114 (user info) at 2004-11-18 13:40:20 (#)
Ranking: 2
Boots are hot.
Submitted by munkeypants (user info) at 2004-11-18 16:35:18 EST (#)
Ranking: 2
Posts with blood, puke, and sexy boots always get +2's.
ALWAYS.
Submitted by antluvdog (user info) at 2004-11-18 15:54:46 EST (#)
Ranking: 2
Wow.
Submitted by Nicole3 (user info) at 2004-11-18 14:52:30 EST (#)
Ranking: 0
That would take a lot of training. Someone asked me if I had a sore foot today as I appeared to be limping. 4" heels may just not be for me.
Submitted by polyamorousaj (user info) at 2004-11-18 14:04:07 EST (#)
Ranking: 2
You'll just have to train yourself in them so you can wear them around when we get down there. Just put pillows on all the sharp corners in your house and walk around in them.
Submitted by Donitsu2002 (user info) at 2004-11-18 13:50:00 EST (#)
Ranking: 2
Submitted by Shlongy (user info) at 2004-11-18 10:33:03 (#)
Ranking: 0
Donitsu- Shows what you know.
I can fuck whomever I choose, whenever I want.
Sometimes, it just takes more force than other times.
So, shut the fuck up.
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Shows what you dont know.
Submitted by JMG114 (user info) at 2004-11-18 13:40:20 EST (#)
Ranking: 2
Boots are hot.
Submitted by Nicole3 (user info) at 2004-11-18 13:37:06 EST (#)
Ranking: 0
AJ, my fear with that is that someone would try wearing them and really hurt themselves. Then I would get sued and die homeless and destitute, all because of Uber.
Submitted by whataefag (user info) at 2004-11-18 12:50:05 EST (#)
Ranking: 2
Epoxy glue won't work.
Sorry ... I had a similar experience. Don't ask.
Submitted by polyamorousaj (user info) at 2004-11-18 11:29:00 EST (#)
Ranking: 2
Bring them to Vegas.
Submitted by Loren1 (user info) at 2004-11-18 10:51:49 EST (#)
Ranking: 2
"(I have washed and physically smashed more puke down sink drains than I care to remember though I have never committed this horrible faux pas myself)."
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Don't forget pots and pans!!!
Too bad you didn't notice the damaged heel two years ago. It would have made an ass-kicking law suit.
:-)
Submitted by Shlongy (user info) at 2004-11-18 10:33:03 EST (#)
Ranking: 0
Donitsu- Shows what you know.
I can fuck whomever I choose, whenever I want.
Sometimes, it just takes more force than other times.
So, shut the fuck up.
Submitted by DeathJester (user info) at 2004-11-18 10:28:10 EST (#)
Ranking: 2
"Have you been drinking?" Nurse Ratchet asked.
+2 One Flew Over The Cuckoo's Nest reference.
Submitted by Donitsu2002 (user info) at 2004-11-18 10:25:30 EST (#)
Ranking: 2
Submitted by Shlongy (user info) at 2004-11-18 10:05:09 (#)
Ranking: -1
What are the chances that I can fuck you while you're wearing the boots?
That way, you wouldn't have to really walk in them too far and they wouldn't be the dangerous weapon that they seem to be.
Think about it, OK Toots?
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amazingly enough i've met Nicole... I've never had the opportunity of meeting you but... I can definitely say that without a doubt....
you have no chance.
Submitted by TigerLilly (user info) at 2004-11-18 10:20:22 EST (#)
Ranking: 2
Damn boots! You must rid yourself of them Nicole.
Give them to Nurse Ratchet for Christmas!!
Submitted by Donitsu2002 (user info) at 2004-11-18 10:15:33 EST (#)
Ranking: 2
haha, good stuff
Submitted by CJRipley (user info) at 2004-11-18 10:15:23 EST (#)
Ranking: 2
It's not a good night until somebody gets hurt.
Beautiful!
Submitted by Judoka (user info) at 2004-11-18 10:13:26 EST (#)
Ranking: 1
Dont drink and walk
Submitted by BLITZKREIG_BOB (user info) at 2004-11-18 10:12:44 EST (#)
Ranking: 2
The boots are cursed. Glue them up and give them to the Salvation Army.
Submitted by Lunch_Pail (user info) at 2004-11-18 10:12:40 EST (#)
Ranking: 2
Pretty good.
Submitted by Jeanneee (user info) at 2004-11-18 10:12:37 EST (#)
Ranking: 2
www.thebachelorisahomo.com
Submitted by R.P.McMurphy (user info) at 2004-11-18 10:11:38 EST (#)
Ranking: 2
"I sat at the bar with a couple friends, Chris (female) and Joe, and chatted with the bartender and other people while having a few drinks, all on the house. Yes, I was a bit tipsy, but nothing serious.
At some point my bladder became full so I headed for the restroom"
__________________________________
I thought: OH NO! german urine porn- when I read that.
I hate that bitch Nurse Ratchett.
Submitted by Caulaincourt (user info) at 2004-11-18 10:09:06 EST (#)
Ranking: 2
no material to argue with here...good post! :)
Submitted by Adamdidit2u (user info) at 2004-11-18 10:06:16 EST (#)
Ranking: 2
No Comment
Submitted by Shlongy (user info) at 2004-11-18 10:05:09 EST (#)
Ranking: -1
What are the chances that I can fuck you while you're wearing the boots?
That way, you wouldn't have to really walk in them too far and they wouldn't be the dangerous weapon that they seem to be.
Think about it, OK Toots?